Possessiveness in a relationship is generational conditioning.
Many people have a problem showing true equality to all others.

I do not possess my girlfriend and she does not possess me.
We are together because each of us want to be together with each other.

Jealousy is rooted in possessiveness.
Since we are both our own person, we are both free to conduct ourselves as we see fit.
When conflict arises, we discuss and come to an agreement.
Each of us has the option to end this relationship at any time.
Yet, we stay together because we can allow each other to be the person we want to be.
It has a lot to do with the fact we respect each other as the one we choose to share ourselves with.

I keep seeing her because I enjoy her as the person she is, not the person I decide she should be.
She keeps seeing me because she enjoys the person I am not the person she thinks I should be.
Its a mutual respect, understanding.

Believe me, I've tried the possessive thing from both positions and its not very good at all.
What we have, works!

Choose wisely

Loving someone and telling them is not courageous.
Anyone can tell anyone I Love You anytime.
When you love someone, saying I love you is the easiest thing in the world.

Actions speak louder than words.
Demonstrating your love for another shouts I LOVE YOU!
I have no problem demonstrating love for the people I love.

Some people say I love you but really don't.
Saying I love you means very little when that love is not demonstrated.
Saying I love you when they couldn't possibly know you well enough to know they love you is a lie.

A teenage boy in the back of his car with a girlfriend can say I love you so he can get laid.
I love you is said many times to manipulate the heartstrings of another.

Saying and demonstrating love only in private is not love.
If you say and demonstrate love only when the two of you are alone but when in public, change how you treat them is lying.

When you love someone, you love them all the time, not just when you are alone with them.
Its something you can't help but to demonstrate.
No courage needed.

Many people who think they are open-minded are not.

Being self-centered in itself is not necessarily a bad thing.

Each of us exist withing the realm of ourselves, from birth to death.
Our selves 'should' be the 'most important person' in 'our' lives.
Nobody else lives behind your eyes.
Nobody else has lived your life experiences exactly as you..
Nobody else has ultimate authority over your life.
No one knows 'you' better than you.
It doesn't matter which gender you are.
Empathy is not the same as actual experience.

TxsGal3333 has a point.

Many men and women are of the old mindset that a woman should be subservient to their men.
Some cultures still hold onto this idea, the idea that the woman is property.
In the 'free' world women are considered people and are granted 'permission' to be their own person. All the while, with the inner 'feeling' women should be property.
So women are granted a 'conditional', public acceptance which is often challenged behind closed doors.
In the 'free' world this often leads to breakups, hostility and divorce.
When a woman exercises her right to be herself, make her own decisions and conduct her affairs as she see's fit it secretly challenges or insults some men.

Its rooted in generational conditioning.
Its taught in child development.
Little girls are taught to act like a lady, play with dolls to teach family care, pretty dresses, makeup, hairdos, showing their feelings (its okay to cry) and on and on.
Little boys are taught manual labors and practices which build a power base.
Be dignified and be a gentleman, leadership, hiding feelings (don't cry), dedication, planning, dexterity and on and on.

Then as adults, these traits/skills, which have been taught for generations, saturate how each gender approaches the world as 'right'. When someone comes into their lives who goes against this conditioning, problems/inner conflict arises. The conflict is hidden, kept in check in public because of public correctness but behind closed doors, it causes relationship problems because they witness a condition they were not prepared for.

Different conditions play different roles in how we accept individual freedom in others.
On one hand, you have how mom & dad, grandma and grandpa and other family members taught their roles.
On the other hand, you have how the public, the media and lone individuals demonstrate their independence.

Many people forget it was the woman's independence and strength which caused there to be a connection in the first place. Behind those closed doors, the generational conditioning leaks into the relationship. Conflict arises and the woman's independence threatens the man's masculinity. The man, conditioned for assertiveness, tries to control the woman.
It happens more than you might think.

As this human species evolves, individualism rises in our population. Media influences, laws and self-awareness adds to the speed at which our species evolves.
Some of us have the ability to see all others as their own person at all times. We are not threatened by their strength of selves because we are strong ourselves.
We don't seek to control others.
We encourage inner strength in others because we already possess inner strength.
Some of us have no problem sharing the power when another demonstrates the ability to conduct their own affairs according to what we consider is true and right.
It doesn't matter their gender, their race, creed or color.
Some of us have actually let go of old discrimination.

Many people know the saying Do unto others as you would have them do unto you and might 'think' they align with that ideal but within themselves, they can't. They are conditioned to assign power, mostly with themselves at the top of the ladder of power. It seems to happen within, anytime more than one person meets up.
Another aspect is when they assign the top of that power to another person.
Its an example of a conditional inferiority complex.

The interrelationship struggles of a man and a woman in an intimate relationship has a tendency to align with the man as the superior and the woman as the inferior. Yet the courtship of the two usually develops because both genders demonstrate the same type of personal independence.

You can see this right here in the discussions at mingle 2.
Men want a strong independent woman able to support herself, control her own life, have her own job, her own car, her own place.
Then, when they find her, the relationship which develops reverts back to their generational conditioning. Problems arise in the relationship and both parties are unhappy.
Many times, neither knows exactly what is wrong but both know, something is certainly wrong. Then the relationships spirals down that hurtful road to resentment and sadness.
Most of the time "you changed" is the reason each will give.
Problem is, you both changed, rather, reverted back to your generational conditioning.
Equality in a relationship is rare.
Some of us can maintain it for awhile but that conditioning always seems to seep in somehow.
A lot of people say relationships take a lot of work.
Problem is, many don't seem to realize the work which needs to be maintained is in how you, yourself maintain the initial ideals which lead you two to be in a relationship in the first place. You have to work to keep the generational conditioning at bay and have the ability to accept that other person as your equal.

I agree in how men and women have similar feelings dealing with break-up.

What I've seen tho, men seem to take the news no matter how its given, as valid.

I think there is no 'better way'/'worse way' a man can be broke up with because the breakup itself is what is important and how he finds out is not as important as the fact it happened in the first place.

After some time has passed to digest the news, the method may become significant but its an after-thought. A review of the events which already occurred.

In high school and college I've seen guys who get the news from their girlfriends friends. I've never heard the guys complain about the method till after the event has past and they've had time to digest the news and become resentful.

When my daughter was in high school her bf broke up with her by text.
She was highly pissed at the fact it wasn't in person. She was more angry about the method than the fact he broke up with her.

My oldest son and his long term girlfriend broke up by phone. Her dad would no longer allow her to be with him because of religious conflicts, they were catholic and we were christian. My son understood and the method wasn't as important as the fact neither of them actually wanted to end the relationship.

I think one of the reasons I break up in person is because I tend to respect the women I get into relationship with and I believe they deserve the personal respect of a face to face experience. It also helps to completely end the relationship so she isn't left hanging with questions or unfounded hope. When I break up its final. Face to face is the only way to drive that point home without hurting them. Just because we are not right for each other doesn't mean I don't care about them. I don't enter into bf/gf relationships unless I do care about them.

Strong men, men who are truly role models,
don't need to put down women to make themselves feel powerful.
~ Michelle Obama

I haven't read any scientific articles but I think wet Mars' water was blown off into space over millions of years when its magnetosphere started collapsing.
Solar wind forced the water into space, which became water ice.
The ice was then swept outward to Jupiter/Saturn and as time ticked by, gathered on moons and in the ring systems.
Its a known fact the Jovian and Saturnian systems have large amounts of water ice surrounding them.

Since our star is slowly rising in temperature as it ages, there may come a time in the far distant future when the Jovian and Saturnian water ice rises in temperature enough to cause water droplets to form on the different moons.
Perhaps 3 or 4 billion years from now. The Earth will be a burnt cinder and Mars may have Earth's water from the same process which caused Mars to lose its water in the past.

Mars could turn wet again but the planet has no protection from solar/cosmic radiation because its magnetosphere no longer exists. Basically, a planet of water but only simple life forms at the bottom of very deep oceans..

Eventually, when the Sun reaches red giant stage, some of Jupiter's moons may be warm enough for liquid water and protected by Jupiter's magnetosphere, eventually develop life.

Additionally, due to the changes in gravitational waves from a larger less dense star, many long duration comets may impact the Jovian moons populating them with long dormant life-giving compounds and even more water ice.
Chances are, Europa could be similar to Earth, eventually.
Its large enough to have a similar gravity which would allow for the processes to occur for atmosphere and resultant weather to form. A water based atmosphere might also increase the pressure enought to allow for complex life forms to develop.
Given enough time, water and heat, it could develop an Earth-like environment.\
But, I'm talking about over a billion or more years.

Its a fact the Sun is growing hotter.
Its a fact as the Sun grows hotter the goldilocks zone moves outward.
Its a fact the Sun will become a red giant.
Its a fact the Earth will be too hot to allow water.
Its a fact Mars will get hotter and the frozen water ice will melt.
Its a fact the gravitational effects of the Sun will change over time.
Its a fact the solar system will have different periods of stability with periods of instability as the properties of our star changes.

All planetary systems will experience significant bombardment and material deposits.
Our Sun has a 10-15 billion year life span. It is currently in the early stages of its main sequence which gives its system a long duration stability.
Its getting hotter as it ages but currently slowly.
The red giant stage will have far greater periods of stability.
The red giant stage will slowly cool.
As it cools, the solar system will freeze again until evetually the entire system is a frozen, dead remnant circling a small white dwarf star. Eventually, even that will grow cold and dead.

The heliosphere will collapse and cosmic radiation and debris will invade our system until a nearby star forms or goes nova and sets the frozen husks of matter into new trajectories. What remains of Earth and other planets might, one day, be be captured by a nearby star and the life process restarted arond a different star. Or...The planetary husks could collide with other mass and be pulverized into dust.

In 8 billion years from now, the Universe will be over 20 billion years old (by some estimates). The Sun is a second generation star at least. This is fact because elements which form from stars already exist in our star system.
For those elements to exist here, other stars had to form them, explode the material into space and then gather that material by gravity to form our star system.

The fact Mars had/has water is insignificant.

[[[Thinking]]]
Which animals can be trained and which ones can never be trained?

I mean, you can train an octopus but can you train a fish?
You can train a bear but can you train ants?
You can train a chimpazee to read a picture book but can you train a raccon to recognize a can label?
You can train an elephant to paint a picture but can you train a beaver to sculpt a statue?

[[[/thinking]]]

This is the Dear John letter of recent history. Only now, instead of snail mail one-way communication, its phone or internet two-way communication.
In the service I've seen guys who get a Dear John letter and many take it hard.
Some can't let go. Will demand to 'see' her asap. Few can actually let her go and need to villify her in order to accept it. The knee-jerk reaction is to think she is cheating or already has someone else taking your place.


From what I've witnessed in other guys I've known who went thru a remote break-up those things are very low on the list of things they feel. Usually just fuel to a fire which has already been lit by far worse assumptions.

Many times, when a gal breaks up with a guy in any way, the guy feels betrayed.
The betrayal then gets justified by imagining she is doing all sorts of things which explain her behavior. Things which have some basis, even a hint, of being a possible motive.
Plus, many times the guy doesn't 'see' it coming.
Probably because most guys don't super-analyse the relationships they are in till something goes very wrong.

It all depends on how deeply a guy feels love for her.
Some guys keep love in their hearts so much it consumes them.
Some guys keep a cushion in front of the love they feel.
Some guys don't really love her at all and merely go thru the motions.

How a guy takes any break-up depends upon the love he feels for her.
Money, distance and time are usually secondary considerations.
Its the severity of the betrayal they feel which sets the reaction.
Plus, the method of break-up is not as important as the fact the break-up happened in the first place.

Then you have the fact she breaks up with him.
It sets a worthiness doubt in his mind.
This impacts a guy's self-worth like a sledgehammer.
His self-esteem takes a hit and his first response is usually anger.
It doesn't matter much how it was done, its the fact it was done and it wasn't his idea.

Adversity is like a strong wind,
It tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn,
So that we see ourselves as we really are.
~ Arthur Golden

Training penguins.

so do I, just sayin

Herbie - The Love Bug

http://www.imcdb.org/movie_64603-The-Love-Bug.html


1963 Volkswagen Sun-Roof Sedan [Typ 1] in The Love Bug, Movie, 1968


1964 Jaguar XK-E in The Love Bug, Movie, 1968

Internet Movie Cars Database
http://www.imcdb.org/

Welcome to the Internet Movie Cars Database. You will find here the most complete list on the web about cars, bikes, trucks and other vehicles seen in movies and TV series, image captures and information about them.

Movie - 44257
Animation Movie - 775
Movie made for TV - 6884
Mini-Series - 1349
TV Series - 5634
Animation Series - 839
Short Movie - 1887
Music Video - 6843
Documentary - 1878
Non-fiction TV - 324

You're Welcome...

The M1-L1 Triple-Pulse Rifle was a fictional assault rifle first seen used by a crew of pirates led by Hanover (Wes Studi) in the 1998 film Deep Rising. This rifle consisted of a rotating cluster of 5 barrels and was described by Hanover as being water-tight, air-cooled, and feeding from a 1,000-round magazine. The weapons' caliber is never stated, but during one scene where the guns are fired by the pirates, 5.56x45mm (.223 Remington) brass is shown dropping at their feet. The weapon was also described as being manufactured in the People's Republic of China (the crates containing the weapons were adorned with Mandarin characters).

In reality, the prop M1-L1 rifles were built upon Calico M955A submachine guns (chambered in 9x19mm) and outfitted with 100 round helical magazines, and the rotating barrels on the weapons were not functional (they were fitted around the real barrel of the Calico, and were rigged to spin when the trigger was pulled, hence giving the illusion that the weapon fired through them).

Besides Deep Rising, the M1-L1 was also re-used in the movie Wrongfully Accused (1998) and also appeared in at least one episode of Stargate: SG1, Smallville (Season 4, Episode 2 - "Gone") and the pilot episode of Sanctuary, sitting on a work bench in a science lab.


An M1-L1 Triple-Pulse rifle lying on the floor of an elevator in Deep Rising.


Calico M955A Submachine gun - 9mm

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No blood lately (I'm thinking sinuses).
The swelling in my legs is gone in the morning but by nightfall they're huge again (and painful). I go thru periods of this and its related to my disability. The burning soles of my feet seem to be related to the swelling.
Being morning right now, the swelling is down, no burning and my blood sugar is within range.

I had a headache when I woke up but coffee and time has soothed that pain.
I'm actually feeling better than I have the last week or so. I'm going to try to get some work done on the spare bedroom today. Still gunna take it easy tho.
I have housework to do as well.

Thanx for the concern, ladies. The blood spotting kinda scared me. I wasn't expecting it. I've had the windows open for about a week now so since its gone, I'm figuring it was my sinuses. It was bright red blood not dark digestive blood, plus I wasn't vomiting the blood, just spitting it out.

I agree about the dr but with my income level I'm kinda stuck with the VA medical system. I can't afford my medicare co-payment or the Rx coverage.
I'm aware of the ER and I know I can use it if I need to. I also know the 'E' in ER stands for Emergency and this wasn't an emergency. I also have the option to drive 25 miles to the VA facility ER where my doctor is on call.

I bought some dayquill and sudafed at the dollar store and those seem to be helping. I'll mention the swelling when I see doc in July.

Hugh, in my younger days of childhood if it wasn't nailed down I would steal it. I didn't steal it for any reason other than to just do it. I also lied, cheated and caused mischief. There was a lot of anger in me.

As I got older the anger faded and I was less of a nuisance. My friends (the gang of people I hung out with, maintained their destructive behavior and slowly we had less and less in common.

Those friendships faded out over time. Most of them ended up in juvenile detention and eventually prison. I didn't take that path.

When I grew up and assumed responsibility for my actions I realized there was something else in life besides causing mischief. I realized lying and cheating were underhanded and untrustworthy and I didn't want to teach my own children to have such anger.

At work, I didn't try to control others. This didn't mean I wasn't paying attention. I knew who I could and couldn't trust. I wasn't the type of person to turn them in or out them as liars but I also didn't encourage that behavior.

When my x started lying to me it was the end of our marriage. I gave her many chances to change her ways, even tried to talk out why she was doing it but she just didn't care.

Now that I am much older I see no reason to lie or steal. I will not tolerate it in my life. I have the freedom to choose the people in my life. My children lie sometimes. They know I know they are lying. I believe they can't help themselves. I blame their mother but I also blame myself because they saw me tolerate their mom's lying.

I don't care if someone else lies or steals when they lie or steal from an entity but when someone steals from a person or lies to a person to hurt them, I won't tolerate that. There's different levels to lying and stealing.

I see people who shoplift as stupid. Pilferage is a different level of stealing unless its way over the top. Pick-pockets are awful. Breaking into a store is different than breaking into someone's home.

Lying with little white lies is different than lying to save-face. Lying to hurt someone is different than lying to build oneself up...and so on.

Lying and stealing is a sign of a weak mind. However, it can also be a sign of desperation. Plus, it can be a compulsive act which has the same effect as addiction.

What I do when I encounter it is directly related to who is doing it and why plus who they are doing it to and why.
I'm not a saint. I've walked those paths before so I am not as judgemental as others might be. I do know when I was doing it, I was dealing with many things which made me feel without control. My life was in turmoil and I lashed out or attempted to take control of something, anything so I could feel better. I found inner peace. I embraced responsibility. Not everyone has the inner strength to do that.

I don't live in Egypt so I am not familiar with your culture.
However, from a human being standpoint I suggest you find what you love and do it.
If your passion is numbers perhaps you will find opportunity in scientific fields.

I believe helping your family is honorable in any culture.

Write a professional resume and get it out there.
Even if the company isn't hiring right now, they may keep your resume for when they are.

Stay positive.

COVID-19 and the criminal justice system
https://www.prisonpolicy.org/virus/
From the beginning of the pandemic, it was clear that densely packed prisons and jails — the result of decades of mass incarceration in the U.S. — offered ideal conditions for the transmission of the coronavirus. Several months later, the virus has claimed thousands of lives behind bars and infected 1 out of every 5 people in prison.

The Prison Policy Initiative is providing data the public needs to demand a humane response to this pandemic. We're illuminating the worst problems in the criminal justice system — as well as the most promising opportunities for change.

A State-by-State Look at Coronavirus in Prisons
http://www.themarshallproject.org/2020/05/01/a-state-by-state-look-at-coronavirus-in-prisons
While new infections in prisons have dropped in recent months from their highest peaks in mid-December, this data no longer includes new cases from the Federal Bureau of Prisons, which has had more prisoners infected than any other system. In early March, the bureau’s totals began to drop because they removed cases of anyone who was released, a spokesman said. Similarly, in early April, the Bureau of Prisons lowered the number of deaths it was reporting among people held in private prisons. As a result, we cannot accurately determine new infections or deaths in federal prisons.

392,565 cases of coronavirus reported among prisoners.
265,888 prisoners have recovered.
2,516 deaths from coronavirus reported among prisoners.

The first known COVID-19 death of a prisoner was in Georgia when Anthony Cheek died on March 26, 2020. Cheek, who was 49 years old, had been held in Lee State Prison near Albany, a hot spot for the disease. Since then, at least 2,515 other prisoners have died of coronavirus-related causes. The week of April 6, the number of deaths reported rose less than 1 percent from the previous week. COVID-19 has killed prisoners in most systems. Only one state — Vermont — has yet to report the death of a prisoner attributed to COVID-19.

While we know more about how prisoners are getting sick, another group of people is also at risk in these facilities: correctional officers, nurses, chaplains, wardens and other workers. We know little about how the coronavirus is affecting them, though they have the potential to carry it both into facilities and back out to their communities. It’s difficult to assess how prison workers are being affected because many aren’t being systematically tested.

In the most recent week, 12 states — Connecticut, Illinois, Indiana, Michigan, Missouri, North Carolina, North Dakota, Oklahoma, South Dakota, Texas, Virginia, West Virginia — released information on the number of their staff members tested for the coronavirus. Where we do know about positive cases, most state corrections departments stress that the count includes only the employees who voluntarily report a diagnosis, often in the course of calling out sick.

Since the start of the pandemic, 108,264 prison staff members have tested positive — with new cases at an all-time high the week of Dec. 22. Testing information for staff remains spotty in most states. Prisons have publicly reported 198 deaths among staff.

We know very little about how many staff are tested, and in many states, it’s not clear how many people are working in prisons right now. What we do know is that in several states, prison employees began to get sick before the people they oversee did.

The Marshall Project will continue to track and publish data on the coronavirus in our prison systems.

Prison systems and the more than 11 million prisoners worldwide have been disproportionately affected by COVID-19. It's estimated there are more than 527,000 prisoners who have become infected with the virus in 122 countries with more than 3,800 fatalities in 47 countries.
~ https://news.un.org

Impact of the COVID-19 pandemic on prisons
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impact_of_the_COVID-19_pandemic_on_prisons
The COVID-19 pandemic has impacted prisons globally. There have been outbreaks of COVID-19 reported in prisons and jails around the world, with the housing density and population turnover of many prisons contributing to an increased risk of contracting the virus compared to the general population. Prison crowding and lack of sanitation measures contribute to the risk of contracting diseases in prisons and jails. As a mitigation measure, several jurisdictions have released prisoners to reduce density and attempt to reduce the spread of the illness. There have also been protests among prisoners and prison breaks in multiple countries in response to prisoner anger over their risk of contracting illness in prison conditions. Before the COVID-19 pandemic, health services within prisons had issues providing adequate care for incarcerated people, and this has only been exacerbated by the impacts of COVID-19. Minority groups within the prison system have been disproportionately affected by the COVID-19 pandemic.

https://www.health.state.mn.us/diseases/coronavirus/testingjail.pdf

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/community/correction-detention/faq.html

COVID-19: A Survival Guide for Incarcerated People
http://www.themarshallproject.org/2020/05/05/covid-19-a-survival-guide-for-incarcerated-people

Sounds pretty bad.
Are you on hospice?
Do you have a will set up.
Is your granddaughter setup to meet her needs?

I understand there's a big difference between a granddaughter and a partner.
You might consider activity where others your age gather.

When using a dating site to meet someone you need to be careful with whom you choose because your situation makes you prone to scammer activity.

Right now you could broaden your preferences and seek out another lonely soul. Companionship, in your state of affairs, can be very good and very fulfilling.

Choose for you first, then allow your granddaughter to get to know the person and see their value to you as you do.

As for doctors setting a time limit for you, the same happened to me.
I had 5 years to live 9 years ago. That death clock hanging over you can cause severe depression. Realize doctors can be wrong.
You may want to consider some counseling with a professional or join a support group.
I have COPD along with some other stuff which keeps me disabled and alone, yet I found someone right here on mingle 2 who matches me perfectly. It can happen but you must choose correctly and not be so picky.

These forums and other forums and social sites can help with the loneliness until you find someone special.

Disclaimer:
There is a certain number of people who will use terminal illness as a ploy to gain sympathy from women so they will date them.
I'm not saying it is you but many women have encountered this ploy and it is always in bad taste.

I'm past my expiration date but I already have a gf so I'm not looking.
Luckily I found a woman who knows my health restrictions and has no real problem with them. A woman who can readily see that I am a good man who is funny and interesting despite my disability. In other words, I wear it well.

My advice is to put it up front and allow them to come to terms with it.
Then, be strong enough to not put your health in the way of building the relationship. Yes, you might have restrictions but you can substitute those restricted activities with other stuff you can do.
I watch movies, talk and listen to music. We have a fun time together.
We go out and do things but she understands those activities can be cut short. Plans might need to be broken or rearranged.
You can still have sex when you both want but you might not have it as much as you think you should but any sex is better than no sex. Use those intimate moments to build the closeness which keeps your heart warm on those scary nights when death is on your mind.

One more thing...
If your granddaughter lives with you, technically you will not die alone.
Cherish that time with her and be the person you want her to remember when you do die.
Try not to be a miserable lonely old man.
Fill her with your history by telling her the tales of your life.
Give her you.