Which is the goal?

We know not everything that makes us 'happy' is healthy and not everything that is 'healthy' makes us happy.

We also know there is a cultural push towards the goal and motivation of being 'happy'. Often times the idea of love is centered around an expectation that we just want another person to be 'happy'. or whatever makes them 'happy' is therefore making us 'happy'.

Do you agree that this cultural philosophy is a potentially damaging one? Or does it matter? Is 'happy' something that happens to us of something we can choose.

I think it may serve us better to embrace the possibility that happiness is one of those 'healthy' choices that we can have WHILE MAKING Healthy choices.

What do you think? Happy or healthy, or choosing to have both simultaneously?

A happy spirit lives in a healthy body ... old german proverb

thats a nice one.

I don't think many people understand "happy".
If you look at the synonyms for happy:
cheerful, cheery, merry, joyful, jovial, jolly, jocular, gleeful, carefree, untroubled, delighted, smiling, beaming, grinning, in good spirits, in a good mood, lighthearted, pleased, contented, content, satisfied, gratified, buoyant, radiant, sunny, blithe, joyous, beatific, fortunate, lucky, favorable, advantageous, opportune, timely, well timed, convenient and the list goes on and on.

Being happy is a personal state of mind.
Nobody can make anyone happy or sad.
Those states of mind happen only within.

"Making someone happy" actually means to placate.
synonyms for placate are: pacify, calm, appease, mollify, soothe, win over, conciliate, propitiate, make peace with, humor.

The thing about emotional state is that the person is supposed to be in control over the emotions, not the other way around.
Emotions are 'fluid', they change naturally.

Holding onto anger, sadness, happiness or joy causes those emotional states of mind to stagnate. Its unnatural and becomes forced.
We all know that forced sadness leads to depression.

Forced happiness leads to sadness because the happiness becomes the norm and more and more extremes are needed to get the desired effect.
If we allow those emotions to naturally occur and change, we recognize them with more intensity when they do occur.

I am alone.
I go weeks sometimes without talking to any people face to face.
Other people are also alone like me.
Most people are not.
We have a unique perspective on ourselves that most other can't have.
Some of us are lost in emotional turmoil but some of us are in control of our emotional states.
We realize that emotions are temporary. We allow them to flow in and out of us naturally.

You might have heard said, "You Can't Find Love By Looking For it".
You also Can't Find Happiness By Looking For It. It just happens.

If you ask a miserable person why they are miserable they may tell you its is because of someone or something else. If they are really honest they might say "Because I Can't Find Happiness".
They are miserable because they are looking outward for something that can only happen within.

That's a good reply tom4u. Whenever I see a profile with the words ....looking for someone to make me happy....I shudder

both

long-lasting unhappiness can make a healthy person unhealthy. this is something everyone can guess.

Well!
Can an unhealthy person or a sick person be happy?
The answer is simple: can't be happy.

In the context of what is told,
health and happiness:
day and night is like;
The night covers the slightest imperfections of the day, making it more alive the next morning.
happiness also covers the health of some unhealthy states, and then allows the health to be more active.

just a point of view...

[by the way, I won't end my words without saying that I want both.)))]

Happiness is often confused with contentment.
People tend to think in extremes.
Happy or sad, healthy or sick.
The reality is that there are shades of severity.

You can be content without feeling constant happiness or sadness.
You can be physical stable without feeling sick or healthy.

Most of us exist and function in the middle someplace.

"I just want to be happy...I just want to be healthy"
actually means I could be healthier or happier than I am right now.

What many don't realize is that happiness is something that is only controlled by you.
Health on the other hand is dependent on the condition of your body and can be controlled by someone (or something) else.

Generally, life is a process of slowly dying.
Its a deteriorating condition that is relative to aging.
Your condition can affect your ability to be content but it is not the deciding factor. You can be on your deathbed and still feel happiness or contentment.

Happiness is something that comes from a person's circumstances. Many people are unhappy.

Many people cannot help their circumstances they are put into. They cannot always choose happiness.

There are plenty couples in relationships not even happy.

I choose to be Healthy. I have joy and that is not found in human circumstances !!

Gave up on happy, I'm just trying to be healthy now.

When the answer to a superficial question is superficial,
When the answer to a medium-depth problem is at medium depth,
When the answer to a deep question is deep,

  I think it will be a more appropriate answer.

There is a little boy and he cries a lot. Because his father died. mother is comforting her;
Mom: baby, your father didn't die. We gave your father back to his mother/soil. The spirit is watching us. the father's spirit used to follow us through the body of the soil. Now we have returned the body, which is composed of soil, to the soil. but his spirit will constantly follow us. his soul will be between us.

This answer to his mother's solace to comfort the child has been a deep answer. and there has not been a proper answer for the child. that is to say, a wrong answer to the child.

the child says: my father is dead.
clear and understandable. the answer should be deep within itself.

her mother should have said:
Your father always loved us. We will always love him forever.
Your father is dead. that's right. he no longer. we will try to get used to it. Because we have no choice.

so;
The deep answer given to the superficial question of a child is not the same setting.
is not in the same weight.

///

only one example for understanding the phenomenon in its context is given. this example has nothing to do with the people on this site.

///

health and happiness.

I think the depth of it is now more clear/visible.

Tom

Many people think that Happiness is something that comes from a person's circumstances.
Its a delusion.
Happiness is an emotional state of mind, nothing more.
Nobody can make anyone happy if that person doesn't want to be happy.
Its purely personal.
People can be disgusted with their circumstances in life but still feel happiness. Nobody feels constant happiness.
The only view that really matters is the view from behind your own eyes. Afterall, its your life you live.

I guess we're not exactly saying the same things. We understand our texts differently. or I couldn't translate it exactly.
no problem.

21.09.2018 and my time is 01:00.
it is time to sleep.
Goodnight Tom...

In a perfect world it would be great to be happy and healthy but this is not a perfect world. I would choose healthy over happy because why be happy if you do not have the health to enjoy your happiness? If you have your health it is only a matter of time before the unhappiness becomes happy.

My Opinion still Stands !!

I see plenty people unhappy. Not choosing to be.

I do know people who have joy like myself !!

We can Disagree ! That is fine.

Me too!

Many don't/can't understand that concept.

Um? I wasn't disagreeing with you?
I was merely stating that we choose to be content/happy/joyful/sad/depressed/angry no matter the circumstances.
I would already be dead from suicide if I couldn't find contentment with my circumstances.
It would be really easy for me to be unhappy or depressed over my failing health, my income, my detachment from the world and personal solitude.
I CHOOSE not to be.
This is because I am in control of my emotional states, they don't control me anymore.
I don't try to exist in constant blissful joy and happiness.
When I do feel joy and happiness, I acknowledge that it is a temporary swing in my emotional state. I don't NEED to hold onto it longer than it naturally occurs.

Neither?
Seems for them to be "goals" it means I have to have little to none of either...
And if/once I find one, or both, I have no more goals and my life is pointless, or I'm constantly chasing the dragon trying to find more happy or more healthy, or I'm adding stress in risk to protect healthy and/or happy.

Other than that, there is much more to life for me than two simplistic concepts.


I hear that's why they're adding vitamins and strawberry flavor to heroin now.


Not...really.
Although true that utilitarianism was ingrained in the founding of American culture just as much as "capitalism" and "democracy" and "christianity."
The whole "goal and motivation of being 'happy'" is just because people don't really understand how deep society/culture was influenced by our forebears adoption of utilitarianism.


...All cultural philosophies are potentially damaging.


To whom? The universe? No. To the random Chinese person? Maybe, they have a different culture. To another American that was raised in the same culture as you? Probably, to some degree, which they may not understand.


Depends on the definition you want to use.
It can be one, the other, both, or neither.


I think when most people talk about happiness it's because they can't understand anything more complex than vague emotional terms.


They're relative terms.
Might as well ask "medium size, cooked, or to have both simultaneously."
Only people that have a defined bias by which to couch the terms can really answer.
And that ultimately defeats the purpose.
...Unless you're looking to identify that bias, but there are better questions to determine those.

happiness and health;

generally, with first meaning to mind two of them are beautiful and we want both. that's all. over.
I think this is a proper way of thinking.

but;
When we dig a little bit of happiness and health, the eyes are witnessing more things.

yes, let's open it a little;

///

health;

one who lost his health, for a certain fee is a doctoral examination. then buy the necessary medicines for a certain fee. So there's money in this. This is okay.
don't need to go too deep.


as for the other, so:

happiness;

Generally speaking, it is not sold in the market, pharmacy, meat department with money. It doesn't rain like rain. and the plant does not grow in the soil.

just so good though. there is more;

not visible. no smell, no taste, no particular hometown.
For that, perhaps no one can express her fully.

Then let us!
How do we find him. where to find. on the floor? in the sky? under the ground? in the dream?

If so, how could it be?;

relativistic phenomenon.
Theoretically abstract concept.
but
in the practice of life we see its concrete manifestation as behavioral in man.

in other words,
The behavior of a cheerful person is a concrete reflection of happiness.

///

There are many organizations such as WHO (World Health Organization), FAO (Food and Agriculture Organization). everyone knows this.
but
world happiness Organization, never heard of such an organization. even if it only remains local. it is only limited to the region.

///

just a point of view...
just a gym.

///

I guess that's enough to dig up the soil in this subjects...

they are not mutually exclusive.
neither hinges on the other.
i choose both.
i will work to stay healthy and seek happiness over sadness