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Topic: Why are women so self centered?
no photo
Sat 04/17/21 05:08 PM
Every so often, like this morning, I get reminded about how obstinate women can be, from another guy who's married. Then I get thankful for being divorced, and am glad I'm not dealing with many of them.

Then I wonder why guys would even consider getting involved in that trap.

Trixie's photo
Mon 04/19/21 05:49 AM

Every so often, like this morning, I get reminded about how obstinate women can be, from another guy who's married. Then I get thankful for being divorced, and am glad I'm not dealing with many of them.

Then I wonder why guys would even consider getting involved in that trap.


Again I say women are not all the same, and you’ve obviously been in a bad relationship. :heart:

TxsGal3333's photo
Mon 04/19/21 06:17 AM
Humm so women that are strong, confident, and know what they want is deemed self-centered by some??

Or is it that those that think that way, think women should bow down to them?

Got news for some just cause a woman knows what she wants and goes for those traits have nothing to do with being self-centered. They are focused on life and what they want. And don't feel they should have to settle for who they know will not make a good partner..

Maybe it is the one that blames women for their shortcomings ~~ That have the problems..

And yes this goes the same for women that think the same way.


Slim gym 's photo
Mon 04/19/21 06:20 AM
Dang !! Where are these self centred woman hiding... I never seem to meet any ... I meet women and I end up filling dead air with my
Jokes and evaluations, get into trouble and they end up walking away.... like it's my fault ha ha!!

Tom4Uhere's photo
Mon 04/19/21 08:36 AM
Why are (anyone) so self centered?

Being self-centered in itself is not necessarily a bad thing.

Each of us exist withing the realm of ourselves, from birth to death.
Our selves 'should' be the 'most important person' in 'our' lives.
Nobody else lives behind your eyes.
Nobody else has lived your life experiences exactly as you..
Nobody else has ultimate authority over your life.
No one knows 'you' better than you.
It doesn't matter which gender you are.
Empathy is not the same as actual experience.

TxsGal3333 has a point.
those that think that way, think women should bow down to them

Many men and women are of the old mindset that a woman should be subservient to their men.
Some cultures still hold onto this idea, the idea that the woman is property.
In the 'free' world women are considered people and are granted 'permission' to be their own person. All the while, with the inner 'feeling' women should be property.
So women are granted a 'conditional', public acceptance which is often challenged behind closed doors.
In the 'free' world this often leads to breakups, hostility and divorce.
When a woman exercises her right to be herself, make her own decisions and conduct her affairs as she see's fit it secretly challenges or insults some men.

Its rooted in generational conditioning.
Its taught in child development.
Little girls are taught to act like a lady, play with dolls to teach family care, pretty dresses, makeup, hairdos, showing their feelings (its okay to cry) and on and on.
Little boys are taught manual labors and practices which build a power base.
Be dignified and be a gentleman, leadership, hiding feelings (don't cry), dedication, planning, dexterity and on and on.

Then as adults, these traits/skills, which have been taught for generations, saturate how each gender approaches the world as 'right'. When someone comes into their lives who goes against this conditioning, problems/inner conflict arises. The conflict is hidden, kept in check in public because of public correctness but behind closed doors, it causes relationship problems because they witness a condition they were not prepared for.

Different conditions play different roles in how we accept individual freedom in others.
On one hand, you have how mom & dad, grandma and grandpa and other family members taught their roles.
On the other hand, you have how the public, the media and lone individuals demonstrate their independence.

Many people forget it was the woman's independence and strength which caused there to be a connection in the first place. Behind those closed doors, the generational conditioning leaks into the relationship. Conflict arises and the woman's independence threatens the man's masculinity. The man, conditioned for assertiveness, tries to control the woman.
It happens more than you might think.

As this human species evolves, individualism rises in our population. Media influences, laws and self-awareness adds to the speed at which our species evolves.
Some of us have the ability to see all others as their own person at all times. We are not threatened by their strength of selves because we are strong ourselves.
We don't seek to control others.
We encourage inner strength in others because we already possess inner strength.
Some of us have no problem sharing the power when another demonstrates the ability to conduct their own affairs according to what we consider is true and right.
It doesn't matter their gender, their race, creed or color.
Some of us have actually let go of old discrimination.

Many people know the saying Do unto others as you would have them do unto you and might 'think' they align with that ideal but within themselves, they can't. They are conditioned to assign power, mostly with themselves at the top of the ladder of power. It seems to happen within, anytime more than one person meets up.
Another aspect is when they assign the top of that power to another person.
Its an example of a conditional inferiority complex.

The interrelationship struggles of a man and a woman in an intimate relationship has a tendency to align with the man as the superior and the woman as the inferior. Yet the courtship of the two usually develops because both genders demonstrate the same type of personal independence.

You can see this right here in the discussions at mingle 2.
Men want a strong independent woman able to support herself, control her own life, have her own job, her own car, her own place.
Then, when they find her, the relationship which develops reverts back to their generational conditioning. Problems arise in the relationship and both parties are unhappy.
Many times, neither knows exactly what is wrong but both know, something is certainly wrong. Then the relationships spirals down that hurtful road to resentment and sadness.
Most of the time "you changed" is the reason each will give.
Problem is, you both changed, rather, reverted back to your generational conditioning.
Equality in a relationship is rare.
Some of us can maintain it for awhile but that conditioning always seems to seep in somehow.
A lot of people say relationships take a lot of work.
Problem is, many don't seem to realize the work which needs to be maintained is in how you, yourself maintain the initial ideals which lead you two to be in a relationship in the first place. You have to work to keep the generational conditioning at bay and have the ability to accept that other person as your equal.


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