Definition of money: a trade medium that has intrinsic value.
Today what passes as money is "colorable" ( what it proports to be - hence it is not), therefore in the 16th century there was money ie gold and silver coins, today there is colorable money for the purpose of imposing indentured servitude on the masses.
I do think a majority of women choose men based on how much money they can get from men, at the same time I do think
there is a higher percentage of men that want women primarily for sex. The worlds oldest profession shows this line of thought.
I feel there are but a small percentage of men and women today whom desire and are able to enter into a trusting relationship whereas money is not front and center, but the desire for the others well-being is the priority, making the monetary second for the couples ability to cope with lifes demands in concert with both financial capabilities.

I do not see that here where I live, now things can be different in the US of course but many women posting here saying it is not true ARE American. They all say they have their own job/income and many of them their own home. They don't need a man's money.
So you may want to rethink that belief.

What I do see here (again not where I live) is a reflection of man's collective wound. That is the masculine collective wound then: not being able to get into their heart, their heart space.
Women's collective wound is very different. It's more in the belly area that we sustained wounding. And that is all about being seen and heard, being allowed to be seen and heard, to speak our minds, to have an opinion, to be an equal and not arm candy or used for sex, and so on and so forth.

As such it again doesn't compute with what you believe to be true as women wanting to be seen & respected it is logical they make sure they can take care of themselves. Over the last couple of decades women have worked their behinds off to get some much needed respect, to be equal, to be allowed to work, make good money, to have a mind of their own, to be accepted into politics and higher positions and so on and so forth.

We've come a long way although not there yet, but men are still behind with working and healing their collective wound.
And being able to get into the heart space mean you can open to love, feel love, flow love, forgive, heal, be generous and kind and caring, and to step into the empowered masculine that provides and protects.
And no, that is not about men paying for everything. But if you're still fully stemmed in the masculine wound you may not get what I'm saying here. If you can step out of that wounding you know what provide & protect means and what it feels like, how wonderful it is to feel that way, to live that way, and to relate that way to women.

Personally I think this is the biggest reason why so many women from 40 and up have difficulty finding a great partner. Most men in that age group are too deeply stemmed in that old belief and masculine wound while the woman isn't resonating with that at all anymore. They've moved to a different level and they need a man who resonates with that. These are (still) few and far between.
In that sense I think for the younger generation it will be easier as younger men often have evolved to this new level.

And anyone having a knee-jerk reaction to what I'm writing here can be sure they are in that wound still.

If man's goal is mostly to use women for sex, then why not end that issue by legalizing prostitution? That would completely change the man-woman dynamic and men would spend time with women based on personalities and not sexuality! Probably would also destroy the careers of many female celebrities!

My last divorce, less than 10 years ago, cost me over $250k including part of my assets obtained prior to that marriage. When divorce settlements become based on what you brought into a marriage and what each earned during the marriage, then we will have a level playing field and a man can afford to take a chance on marriage.

Yes, Crystal. I am wanting a life partner to treat me as an equal and not just want me for sex and to clean up after them. I try to stay as independent as possible monetarily speaking.

Yep, equal for sure! And also a man who is ready for new love, meaning truly healed and okay with a previous relationship having ended and not latching on to that anymore.
Not easy to find.

The money thing I've always seen a bit as a team thing. Which includes that if one has less or nothing the other fills in. That's love, at least how I see it.
And I find it self-explanatory that if both have equal income both invest equal in everything.
You're a couple and you don't suddenly un-couple because you have invested E100 and they didn't because they didn't have it. If that's a problem you better stay single. My view.

I understand this is easier to find when both are still young, the first time round relationship.
But then there's this things again: if I can heal and do that all over again, even after 2nd or 3rd relationships, why can't a man do the same?

Most women I know are like me, they heal after a breakup and enter a new one all-in. Sure you have a bit of fear as you've learnt it can go wrong, but you still go for it.

Why can't & don't men do the same? Would make life and love relationships a helluva lot easier, hihi.
There'd be a lot less singles too if men could, and thus many many happy people!

Equal risk for a woman. Did you think of that? The way you present it is as if only a man ever brings stuff & money into a relationship. Women do the exact same thing so it's THEIR risk just the same. Yet, they still do it.

And men can screw their ex over big time. My mom is a good example of that. She was owed half of the house they'd had built, some $150.000, and some $2-3000 a month in alimony. Never seen a cent! He was living in luxury with it, my mother in poverty.
She couldn't do a thing as he lived abroad and still does to date.

If you don't want that risk you can go for a prenup. That's what it's for. Problem sorted.

Yes, in some cases women should have the same concerns IF they have assets. One of the problems with international forums are the difference in laws. What you describe from your mom, could never happen in the US assuming her ex actually had assets. Most men that were behind in child support or alimony didn't get any stimulus checks; they went to the ex! Can cost you any business license you may hold, any sportsman license, and your drivers license. In my state your employer now pays child support directly from your paycheck!! The universal problem is those who don't work or have anything worth taking!!

Hi Sparkling Crystal,
perhaps reread my post without interjecting preconceived thoughts.
My 2nd paragraph - " I do think..." has nothing to do with a woman NEEDING my money! And my statement is NOT a belief, it comes from 45 yrs of experience - approximately 60%, including those who are financially self sufficient.
As far as your premise "the masculine collective wound" I agree with you on that point - most men, not all. And certainly is not a problem for me. My "heart space" is half open upon first meeting, as we get to liking each other and spending time together my heart space slowly opens more. When the relationship gets to a point where I feel she is withholding/ guarding her thoughts from me it's like a stab in the heart, if this persists of course at that point I do close my heart space and relationship is over. I've always wanted the woman in my life to speak her mind and have an opinion. What I don't understand is why, in the relationship, hide things of their heart from me when I ask about specific things.
In general I'm for equality, though can be quite subjective depending on the couples strengths and weakness of the woman and man.
What I've posted here are my thoughts and perceptions based on experience and knowledge.

what a very young man posting about this...too early a guy to have experienced a "Money"traumatic relationship....whos that woman ?lemme tell you not all ladies are like that....that woman and me are same 🤣 next time be extra careful of "US"

I find it interesting that not one woman posting here gave an answer to the OP's question posed "Do most women use men for money". Instead most women post that they have their own jobs and money. No men on here said that the women on here used men for money. No women here bothered to ask the men why they thought most women use men for money.

it only depends on women

I can remember the days here in England when it was expected a guy to pay every time they went out on a date, however long they had been courting the girl, when the guy had no money they went out for walks together, she was never expected to pay, ever. The girl was not using the guy, it was the culture here, it was the normal way of life and recent history, a different era.

The question is, what has changed that that has changed?
In essence the empowered masculine IS like that!
I've been there with a guy who wasn't empowered in his masculinity really and even he found it difficult to accept when I paid for things. He was flat broke, lots of debts to pay off, and I had a good job at the time. Since I don't have a money trauma but did want us to have a good time, I paid for things we did. That was going out and having drinks, but also great meals. And we went out all the time when together.
He didn't feel comfortable with that at all, even though I didn't care about it.

It may be considered old-fashioned that the guy pays but personally I feel it's quite normal he's wanting and willing to do that. Up to a point of course. Like when two live together, both having income, it'd be unfair to expect one party to pay for everything (rent, healthcare, and so on) and the other just pocketing their money, running up a nice savings account.
That is not okay. But that's self-explanatory.

But when dating it should be enough that the woman offers to pay her share, or occasionally pay for drinks or entrance fee or whatever. Not like keeping a balance book to make sure he didn't pay 10 cents more over the course of a month.
When a guy is so difficult with paying for something I lose my interest. Not because I'm after money but because I want my man to be caring and generous. I am too.

I think the laws are pretty similar here too, the problem for my mother was that he was living abroad.

As for the rest, I always get the impression that many men only look at the amount in their bank account and assets before and after. With that the value of what the woman brought in, other maybe in some cases than money or goods, is completely not valuated nor recognized.
As an example... because of how men & women are wired differently it's often woman who gives up her career or puts it on the backburner to take care of her family's needs. That means she can't build up money like the man that simply keeps working and building his career.
I am one of those who did that, I found it quite normal to do. But in retrospect I'm now in the financial difficult situation because of that. Had I not done it I would've had a great career and would've made much more money than my then husband.
Then 17 yrs after our divorce he has the audacity to ask me to give up my right to pension over the time we were married! I refused. Since I gave up my career I also said goodbye to building up a good pension.
He was PO that I refused and I can't believe the baws he has to even think of asking me! Clearly he's conveniently forgotten what we had agreed and what I gave up on to raise our two beautiful kids!
I wouldn't do it any other way if I had to do it all over again btw.
I was also the one that came up with selling our small house for good money and buy a brandnew larger one. DOUBLING the value of what we owned. Again I was the one with the acuity in that sense, being raised by a dad who made his money grow that way.

Another example... I have helped a partner do up his house so its value got higher. He couldn't work out himself how or where to start, I grew up with renovating, easy-peasy for me! I also helped him pay bills when he couldn't and was about to lose his house & car. He would've been in the street with 2 teenagers if it wasn't for me. He paid me back later when he could btw, but because of me he still had his house & car.
So I helped him, but that's never taken into account, only bank balance. Then when I was without a job he became difficult about him paying for my keep. Seriously? If it wasn't for me he'd have lost everything! And the fact I didn't get a benefit was because his income & bank balance was too high. So I was penny-less because of HIM.

Just a few examples to convey that it isn't always so black and white as "money & assets". There are loads of other things that have value but aren't taken into account. If you had to get someone in for the input I have provided in relationships it'd cost a frigging bomb! I gave it freely.

And that's me, but I know it often goes like that. Non-monetary input is disregarded while in actual fact the price-tag to buy that from an expert could likely vie with what the bloke has in his bank account.

no one uses anyone for Money..the point is..if the woman saw that your intentions with her is sex and after that you end up giving her money..what else do you expect..she will end up getting more money from the guy

If you are going to spend it anyway, it doesn't matter. If you start spending money on her that you wouldn't spend on yourself and it has nothing to do with anything, that is when you have a problem.