The Correct Way to Come Home Drunk

Two married friends are out drinking one night, when one turns to the other
and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after
we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the
driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage, and take my
shoes off before I go into the house. I sneak up the stairs, and get undressed in
the bathroom. Then I stick my foot in the toilet and pee down my leg to prevent splashing sounds. I tiptoe into the bedroom and ease into bed. My
wife STILL wakes up, and yells at me for staying out so late!" His friend looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, pee hard into the toilet water, then use the full flush, throw my shoes in the closet, undress in the bedroom, then jump into be d, slap her on the ass and shout, WHO' S HORNY????!!! and she acts like she's sound asleep! It works every time!!!

NYUCK, NYUCK, Chortle -chortle !!!!

lol...her loss! ;)