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Topic: Holy Hell! I have been proposed to!!!..never saw it coming!
krupa's photo
Mon 10/20/08 04:56 PM
I am still in shock.

Saturday a.m....My cell rings at work and it is my first true love. We met when she was 13. I was 16. We dated until I was 21.

Fate seperated us and I hadn't seen or spoken to her in 16 years. She was in town and asked if I was willing to see her. I couldn't resist.

Seriously, it was like real magic. (Please bear in mind that niether of us ever lied to each other and had always been completely honest....even when we parted ways..so trust has never been an issue)

Within 2 hours of being with each other...she asked me to consider marrying her and moving to China (where she works).

She is not only beautiful, she is extremely intelligent and she is indeed my first real love. It just seems so over the top.

Weighing my options...(I swore I would never marry....buuuuuuuttttttt......)

I mean I am deliriously happy. But, still trying to think with a sense of practicality.

Any thoughts?

ljcc1964's photo
Mon 10/20/08 04:57 PM
Do it. Doooooooooooo it........

bad_girl's photo
Mon 10/20/08 04:59 PM
Do you love her enough to marry and move

ABS929cbrrr's photo
Mon 10/20/08 04:59 PM
well might as well sleep on it for a night, if ya got nothing to loose try it.

no photo
Mon 10/20/08 04:59 PM
Two words: Slow down.

Three more words: Think it through.

There's a reason why some wise man, probably Greg Louganis, said "Look before you leap"....

no photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:00 PM
If you know that she is your "head over heels"...don't let her get away...and best of luck to youflowerforyou flowerforyou flowerforyou

wraithme66's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:00 PM
Wow! That's really awesome. Good for you dude. Go ahead. What do you have to lose?

Ceci47's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:01 PM
Maybe think about it alittle? But, I still think you should. =)

justme659's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:01 PM
Just because you once swore you would never get married doesnt mean you cant change your mind. Just weigh your options, is there anything keeping from moving? Family, children, ect. Be sure you both are on the same page about finances and future plans for kids and such. Good Luck

no photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:02 PM

Two words: Slow down.

Three more words: Think it through.

There's a reason why some wise man, probably Greg Louganis, said "Look before you leap"....





You definitely should think long and hard before making such an important decision.

ledi180's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:05 PM
16 years is a long time to spend apart - people change over time for the good and for the bad sometimes. I think you take the time to see if she's still the girl you loved all those years ago. If the answer is yes and there are no obligations keeping you in the US, then pack up and go to her. It's a HUGE decision, take your time. If she's serious, she'll wait flowerforyou

adirtygirl's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:06 PM

Wow! That's really awesome. Good for you dude. Go ahead. What do you have to lose?



what does he have to lose??? How about 1/2 of whatever he owns if it does not work out if he gets taken to the cleaners...I would think about it before you go making some wild and fast decision....

Plainome's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:06 PM
Edited by Plainome on Mon 10/20/08 05:07 PM

Wow! That's really awesome. Good for you dude. Go ahead. What do you have to lose?


Sorry, for being pragmatic, but..........he hasn't talked to her for sixteen years?? Has a date on the fly because she was in town, talks for two hours??? She wants him to move to China, and you ask what he has to lose??

His single life, as she wants him to marry her. The place he lives. Any friends and family visits, as he won't probably be able to make it back on a weekly basis.

I don't know.........you were in love with her........I'd say give the relationship a try, but I find it a bit over the top for her to ask her to marry you after a two hour convo. I mean...........you broke up when you were 21.......have you had contact since then?? A lot happens and changes. I'd just hate to see you "go for it" and end up in China, and find out that.........well, she wasn't the "girl" you used to know.

But, then again, only you can say what you want.....

krupa's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:06 PM
Still got the Chills......Oh she is defineitely my "Head over heels" thing.

All my friends are really cool about it (they met her and are really impressed) My friends just don't want me to be alone. Not exactly sure how to break it to my small, close knit family.

Oh man! I am torn!....My heart knows that this is my shot at happiness.

My head is screaming that I have a good job and a really stable life...(though no romantic love)

I really need a beer........

no photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:09 PM
Yes yes, but make sure the wedding is at least 1.5 years away so you have time to reconsider, feel things through, and to see if she is serious and not rushing for personal reasons

veronyca's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:12 PM
A beautiful story indeed, besides your not getting anywhere online and from where I am sitting you are still in love with her. I just started seeing my ex after 8 years apart and my feelings stayed the same. I feel that if fate is giving you a second chance then you have to take it.

krupa's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:15 PM
Wise words guys......

Don't misunderstand....we ended up spending the whole weekend together.....(I realize that one weekend is not a lot of time)

However, the long conversations into the dawn hours about where we have been....what our lives have become...professional goals....her 15 year old son...her desire to return to her home town (where I still live)....it all just seemed to flow so naturally and smoothely....like it was meant to be.

Yet, I still have my cynical and jaded side...every woman who I have ever loved has cheated on me....everyone but her.


krupa's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:18 PM
I hear you Veronyca...(Beautiful name)

This whole thing is just screaming FATE!!!!!!! to the both of us.....

Plainome's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:37 PM
Yanno, I'm sure a lot of things running through ur head right now.......but, I think it boils down the the answer to this one question:

Would you be able to live with yourself if you didn't at least give it a go??? I'd still hold off on the marriage part for a year or more, and would be a little worried if she wasn't ok with that..........but other than that, ??????

krupa's photo
Mon 10/20/08 05:48 PM
Well, this just gets odder....

Picking up on some things from our conversations...I gleaned that she had been speaking to my parents.....

(Just got off the phone with Mom and Dad)

Apparently she has called every year or two just to check on me and apologize to my parents. (Only now do I find out from my own parents!!!!)

What ended our initial relationship was that she was getting better (materialistic offers) when I was young and I knew I couldn't compete so I let her seek her way. It hurt but, I didn't want her to settle for less (that would be me) because I really did want the best for her.

This weekend she was apologizing for it and I just didn't make the connection. I let her know that I never begrudged her a shot at a better life and held no resentment.

Turns out that my own parent knew that she had done quite well for herself and was just wanting to get back to a pure and understanding love. She had asked thier permission to contact me...(I guess that is how she got my cell #)

Ever had a day of a euphoria that is so overwhelming that you have to remind yourself to breathe?

I am not used to it and just really trying to assimilate it

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