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Topic: getting over shyness
Sandy9876's photo
Fri 09/25/09 03:19 AM
I used to be such an outgoing person when it came to men, very forward and and full of life however I've become the opposite after my last breakup a few years ago and it's really annoying.

I've become shy. I know there are many out there that are shy. A man I find attractive talks to me and I go all red and can barely speak!

How to start, any suggestions?

southern_bee's photo
Fri 09/25/09 03:55 AM
ya might need to work on why he turned you shy..

no photo
Fri 09/25/09 03:56 AM
http://www.shyfaq.com/overcome.html:smile: flowerforyou

Jtevans's photo
Fri 09/25/09 05:07 AM

I used to be such an outgoing person when it came to men, very forward and and full of life however I've become the opposite after my last breakup a few years ago and it's really annoying.

I've become shy. I know there are many out there that are shy. A man I find attractive talks to me and I go all red and can barely speak!

How to start, any suggestions?



get drunk and get naked



hey it works for chicks on Girls Gone Wild :thumbsup:

LewisW123's photo
Fri 09/25/09 05:14 AM


That is a good article. Make a list of your own, from their list of situations and work on those.

Make a point of talking to strangers when you are out at the store, asking clerks for assistance, etc. Eventually it will come a little more naturally, so when that dude you have your eye on approaches you, you don't stand there and say "Uhhh, duhhh...." The conversation will come easily, because you've been practicing.

Lilypetal's photo
Fri 09/25/09 05:17 AM
Until you get comfortable with him, don't make too much eye contact. Glance around the room or pick one spot on his face to look at.

unsure's photo
Fri 09/25/09 05:30 AM
I use to say that I was shy and all of my friends would say, OMG are you kidding me! I kept thinking they were crazy because I always thought I was shy...my problem isn't that I am shy, my problem is that I get bored very easily. For some odd reason, men have trouble holding my attention. I can talk to men for awhile but then it seems like I get this urge to get away from them and quick. I usually tell my friends, OMG I didn't even hear what he was saying because he couldn't get past talking about himself. All they do is laugh at me and tell me that I am just not really interested in finding anyone right now.
Do you think this could be what you are going through? I think when we have gone through certain things, we begin to wonder IF we really want to experience that AGAIN!!
But to be totally honest, I enjoy being single. I love spending time with my boys and my soon to be daughter-in-law. I keep busy and I truly believe that being single has its advantages that a lot of people overlook!!! I think it starts with being happy with YOU!!
Good luck flowerforyou

poohbearface19's photo
Fri 09/25/09 08:49 AM

I use to say that I was shy and all of my friends would say, OMG are you kidding me! I kept thinking they were crazy because I always thought I was shy...my problem isn't that I am shy, my problem is that I get bored very easily. For some odd reason, men have trouble holding my attention. I can talk to men for awhile but then it seems like I get this urge to get away from them and quick. I usually tell my friends, OMG I didn't even hear what he was saying because he couldn't get past talking about himself. All they do is laugh at me and tell me that I am just not really interested in finding anyone right now.
Do you think this could be what you are going through? I think when we have gone through certain things, we begin to wonder IF we really want to experience that AGAIN!!
But to be totally honest, I enjoy being single. I love spending time with my boys and my soon to be daughter-in-law. I keep busy and I truly believe that being single has its advantages that a lot of people overlook!!! I think it starts with being happy with YOU!!
Good luck flowerforyou


yeah thats my point i sometimes get bored easilly... with a guy.... not always but it happens all dought iam meeting up a guy today.. so i hope my shynesss have got oever we worked on getting over my shyness we were on cam aah both ways him starrring me starring kidna ackward at first..... but i loosened up a little hahaa

Sandy9876's photo
Fri 09/25/09 05:30 PM
http://www.shyfaq.com/overcome.html

OMG! this is a primo article. I must admit it bought tears to my eyes as I was reading it, can't explain why.
It seems an excellent way to try and overcome my particular shyness.

Especially the part about making friends and striking up conversations with strangers, that seems to be really hard for me.

Thank you CyPoetflowers

Roco's photo
Fri 09/25/09 11:47 PM
interesting, i didn't think people could revert back to shyness...i'd like to go back to shyness, it's a reflection of modesty, of innocence

roko

msharmony's photo
Fri 09/25/09 11:49 PM

I used to be such an outgoing person when it came to men, very forward and and full of life however I've become the opposite after my last breakup a few years ago and it's really annoying.

I've become shy. I know there are many out there that are shy. A man I find attractive talks to me and I go all red and can barely speak!

How to start, any suggestions?


I think one way to break out of the shell is by making a habit of complimenting strangers throughout the day. They will hardly be upset by it and the more used you get to speaking up about pleasant things, the more you will become comfortable with speaking up ,,period.



just a suggestion

CatsLoveMe's photo
Sat 09/26/09 02:42 AM
Edited by CatsLoveMe on Sat 09/26/09 02:43 AM
Hi sandy, what are the chances I'd meet another Queenslander on here? My ex was from there, Cooktown and Cairns to be exact. She was one of those never knows a stranger types and blah blah blahed to everyone, and sadly her ego and personality got her into trouble again and again. Sometimes you should realize that maybe the other person would like to say something too, and you are not always the life of the party. What I'm saying is don't be shy, open up, take some risks, but don't take it to extremes, either.

no photo
Sun 09/27/09 05:37 AM
Malls are a great dojo for overcoming shyness and I would frequent them and pick out ten random people to say Hello to and record their responses. (Some people wouldn't even respond!)

Next trip, I would pick out ten random people and strike up conversations with using the weather as a subject i.e. Is it supposed to rain all day? Hot enough for you? just little subtle topics and weather was a great topic because most people pay attention to the weather or it concerns them.

And the next trip, start conversations with people and pay them a compliment about their shoes, jewelry, clothing, etc and follow it up with an open ended question, for example, "Those are some really nice shoes you are wearing, may I ask, where did you get them?" This does two things, You have complimented someone and that makes the other person feel noticed or special and people like to be noticed or admired. secondly, you have asked an open ended question and their response most likely won't be a No, Yes, maybe or a I don't know. Be prepared to ask more open ended questions if the subject person seems interesting.

rehearse your open ended subject questions before making the mall trips, sound genuine and sincere as well and mentally rehearse the stores inside the mall for the encounters, book stores and specialty shops are golden!

PacificStar48's photo
Sun 09/27/09 06:02 AM
Conversation Ice breakers/extenders.

Offer a compliment?

Noteing something that you have in common.

Asking people if they have brother's and sisters?

Asking how long they have lived in the area?

Asking if they like the movie or the book better?

Where was your last vacation?

Do they have pets? Or and interesting pet story from childhood.

What is the last thing you lost?


robert1652's photo
Sun 09/27/09 06:09 AM

I used to be such an outgoing person when it came to men, very forward and and full of life however I've become the opposite after my last breakup a few years ago and it's really annoying.

I've become shy. I know there are many out there that are shy. A man I find attractive talks to me and I go all red and can barely speak!

How to start, any suggestions?
Talk to me Kewi

Englishrose2's photo
Sun 09/27/09 06:43 AM
I can be shy and lost for words but then i compose myself and think hey girl your just as hot as her and modest to!!laugh laugh

Katzenschnauzer's photo
Sun 09/27/09 07:16 AM
I talk to strangers all the time but it's a crap shoot. Sometimes people are leery of you and give you a blank stare.noway
Go to the grocery store to the pet food aisle. First man to come along say, "Heh heh, this is SUCH a serious aisle isn't it? You mess up here and you're going to have trouble at home!"

Sandy9876's photo
Sun 09/27/09 01:38 PM

I talk to strangers all the time but it's a crap shoot. Sometimes people are leery of you and give you a blank stare.noway
Go to the grocery store to the pet food aisle. First man to come along say, "Heh heh, this is SUCH a serious aisle isn't it? You mess up here and you're going to have trouble at home!"

:laughing:

Sandy9876's photo
Sun 09/27/09 01:40 PM


I used to be such an outgoing person when it came to men, very forward and and full of life however I've become the opposite after my last breakup a few years ago and it's really annoying.

I've become shy. I know there are many out there that are shy. A man I find attractive talks to me and I go all red and can barely speak!

How to start, any suggestions?
Talk to me Kewi

Hi.
The weather's nice isn't it?
That's a lovely pipe your smoking where did you get it?
....lol

Sandy9876's photo
Sun 09/27/09 01:40 PM


I used to be such an outgoing person when it came to men, very forward and and full of life however I've become the opposite after my last breakup a few years ago and it's really annoying.

I've become shy. I know there are many out there that are shy. A man I find attractive talks to me and I go all red and can barely speak!

How to start, any suggestions?
Talk to me Kewi

Hi.
The weather's nice isn't it?
That's a lovely pipe your smoking where did you get it?
....lol

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