Is it that time already? ****.... Do I have time to shave my head first? Will I be flying in first class or should I bring my fire suit? Are you here now because that woman I was with last night kept yelling out your name? I told that woman to shut up. Why don't she listen to me? Why are you trying to put the fear of "you" in me now? Can we all just get alone? Why is water wet? Why are my questions going over your head? Will Jon and Kate ever get back together? Why not? What about the kids? Why do we say "take the good with the bad" and not "take the bad with the good"? Of course I'm gonna take the Good with the bad. Why shouldn't I? Will you answer me please? Whats going on with the Tennessee Titans? 0-6? Do you remember the Titans? Denzel does. Do you have the time? What are your plans for Helloween? Any parties? If so, can you be my wingman? The "LADIES" just love that trick you can do. Remember.... that time you walked on water... ""C-L-A-S-S-I-C""

Or...


What the HELL were you thinking in the first place?


Or...

Oh - My - God...... People have been worried sick about you, how come you never call, don't you think you could at least leave a note, a email or a text message (OMG), and did you remember to bring something nice back, I thought you knew what size shirt I wear, oh why don't you comb that hair, this world has been a real mess, are you hungry or anything, why don't you eat more healthy. do you ever think about having kids, boy or girl, why don't you have kids, can't you be responsible and take care of things on time, is that wine and fish on your breath I smell, you know you're gonna start getting a reputation, if you keep frowning like that your face will stay like that forever, do you think these pants make me look fat, why don't you run along now and go to church like everyone else, good lord... oh my god it's running late, where has the time gone, it's so nice of you to come by even though you don't talk too much, we should catch up sometime and break some bread have some wine, speaking of bread...what was the best thing before sliced bread, does your mother know you're out so late, I love what you've done with your sandals, hey.... does this look infected, It does, Damn... I have no cream for this at all, wheres the closest Wal-Mart, why are you looking at me like that, do I have something in my teeth, why are you asking me what the bible says, you wrote that book right, I'm sure everything will be alright, you just sit down and make yourself comfortable, hey where do you think you're going, just a minute here, come back...


now that's just the funniest thing, I just don't understand what gets into you... sometimes you seem like such a nice God but a little unreliable if you ask me, almost rude in a way, probably better off without you anyways, the nerve of you to just up and leave us like that. Oh well. Now get off your fricken *** and do something to fix this damn mess you've created!


OH..... Hey God, Are we still on for Helloween? Who are you dressing up as? Bill O'Reilly???????

Uhhhhhhhh, on second thought.... No Thanks


Come Back Soon !!!! Bye

Where is my Spiro Agnew watch??????

I would ask; what came first, the day or the night

Why bother, would just be a riddle of an answer anyway...

who

Some dude.

I'd probably just ***** slap him, I wouldn't be able to ask him anything afterwards....

why didn't you just kill satan from the get go?????

Okay, I might ask that one

Truly. Or better yet,...

Why didn't you fix Adam up with a nice girl like Mary instead of a bimbo like Eve?

Why are there so many mean, uncaring peopleiods?

Because god refused to kill Satan and gave Adam a bimbo for a wife.



Or God might say, "Don't look at me. I didn't create that particular universe it just happened by accident from some goop that fell on the floor of my laboratory."

I don't really buy into the Adam and Eve thing..but why is Eve a bimbo?

Where's My New Car!!!

Well, "bimbo" might not be the right term to use.

But the point is that Eve fell to sin and dragged Adam down with her.

But then later in the story Mary came along who was supposedly the only 'sinless' mortal human to have every lived, and she was thus able to carry baby Jesus for the 'perfect' God.

But the question then becomes why didn't God create a woman like Mary for Adam's wife in the first place, and then there wouldn't have been any 'fall from grace' to start with.

So all of humanity now suffers because of God's poor choice of creating a mate for Adam.

(assuming we believe in that particular mythology)

I agree, that I don't buy into that story either.

You question is a good one.

Why are there so many mean peopleoids?

I would add to that question, "Why allow those mean peopleoids to exist on the same planet with the good peopleoids?"

Isn't the universe big enough to give the mean peopleoids their own planet?

I don't think they come to this planet mean..maybe there needs to be a ship to take them all to the mean planet when they well...go mean.

Much confusion with the Adam and Eve story..fall from grace..hummm

I would ask for clearer vision to determine what things GOd has sent into my life and what things the fallen angel is trying to CONVINCE me God sent in my life. The road to heaven isnt easy and it gets hard in the modern world to stay out of the gray and keep to the right choices.

Actually, if you read some of the Gnostic texts at Sacred-Texts, Adams a bigger twit then Eve ever could be. Adam keeps crying himself to death, and God kept ressurecting him. Eve was the one who kept things going. I'd have slapped him silly and left his butt.

That said, why does Adam have to do what Eve says? Not man enough to say, "Sorry hun. God said not to, and I'm gonna do what he says" Course, considering Adam's track record with Lillith, I guess that's a stretch.

I'd ask IT if it really has a gender. Then perhaps, if the Bible was really written by prophets who were writting the opinions of IT. Cuz, a lot of it seems to be written by old, biased, prejudiced men.

Great point !!