Topic: First Meeting
no photo
Wed 01/27/10 07:51 PM
I recently started chatting with a man that was interested in meeting and I too am interested.

HOWEVER, he wanted to meet at his apartment. The fact that I have at least half a brain has forced me to decline his offer, and suggested we meet in a public place.

His response was almost angry, and he said that if I feel unsafe forget it. My response was that if I felt unsafe I wouldnt meet at all however I feel its best for BOTH of our safety that we meet in public.

My question is to those that feel its ok to meet someone for the first time in such a personal setting. WHY? And if someone you may be interested in feels that it is uncomfortable why would you push the issue?

Needless to say I am not going to meet him. Even in public. Just not worth the hassle. But I am interested to know why some men (and maybe women) become almost hostile when first meeting.

This has happened to me once before, where I went to meet a man at a casino, and when I got there and called him to find out where exactly to meet, he directed me to his hotel room....I left that time too.

no photo
Wed 01/27/10 07:56 PM
You did the right thing. If it feels wrong, it probably is.
Meet and Greet for a coffee, then maybe lunch another time.............

Although I did do lunch the first time I met someone here, it was a three hour drive.

If the guys gets all angry about not meeting him at the Apt. or hotel room.....move on.

Updawg's photo
Wed 01/27/10 07:58 PM
always meet in public

Goofball73's photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:04 PM
I meet in public places, with plenty of exits, and plenty of cops around. I mean....chicks be whack these days man.

wraithme66's photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:06 PM
You did the right thing... The guy was a freak sociopath.

tbone1955's photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:15 PM
Any so called man that would not want to meet you in a public setting for the first time or even the second is a LOSER. How much of a pig do they have to be to think that it is acceptable to go directly to a private place.

The guy is a great big DOUCHE bag and don't ever let a man talk you into this.

This is excactly why it is so hard for us respectable men to get dates.

TBONE

no photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:15 PM
Edited by CyPoet on Wed 01/27/10 08:16 PM

You did the right thing... The guy was a freak sociopath.

With an Anger Management certificate folded up in his wallet.laugh

STARTRAVELER's photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:24 PM
Good for you !You did the right thing .I would'nt even think about meeting the first time in private .this ai'nt the old days anymore !

Tod66's photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:28 PM
To me its just sad that guys assumed the wrong thing on someone that should have been their friend first and foremost on here..It just makes me angry you were treated that way

no photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:30 PM
He was a pervert. NEXT!!!!

STARTRAVELER's photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:36 PM

He was a pervert. NEXT!!!!
Bingo !

kaadeshka's photo
Wed 01/27/10 08:56 PM
Personally I found it strange that he new exactly what you were thinking and tried to accuse you of fear. A valid fear for anyone no matter gender.

Seems to me he was guilty of something aside from being a huge creep.

no photo
Thu 01/28/10 04:21 PM
I am grateful for the support. Its nice to know this isnt the norm among men.

I find it funny that no one has said that they dont see a problem with meeting in a private place. I havent done a whole lot of internet dating, and already I have had 2 men insist on meeting in a private place.

So where are all the proponents of this? I want to hear your side....

STARTRAVELER's photo
Thu 01/28/10 05:03 PM
No you do'nt it's just BS to get you where you should'nt be !

wiley's photo
Thu 01/28/10 08:00 PM

I am grateful for the support. Its nice to know this isnt the norm among men.

I find it funny that no one has said that they dont see a problem with meeting in a private place. I havent done a whole lot of internet dating, and already I have had 2 men insist on meeting in a private place.

So where are all the proponents of this? I want to hear your side....


Does common sense suggest to you that meeting a complete stranger in a private place is perfectly ok? Sorry "meeting" someone online doesn't count. An online "persona" can be very different from a real live person.

no photo
Thu 01/28/10 08:29 PM


I am grateful for the support. Its nice to know this isnt the norm among men.

I find it funny that no one has said that they dont see a problem with meeting in a private place. I havent done a whole lot of internet dating, and already I have had 2 men insist on meeting in a private place.

So where are all the proponents of this? I want to hear your side....


Does common sense suggest to you that meeting a complete stranger in a private place is perfectly ok? Sorry "meeting" someone online doesn't count. An online "persona" can be very different from a real live person.


Of course I would NEVER meet someone in a private place. I am just curious as to who does engage in such risky behavior, and why they do. This is my only reason for this post. Obviously there are those that do it. I just want to hear their justification.

wiley's photo
Thu 01/28/10 08:32 PM



I am grateful for the support. Its nice to know this isnt the norm among men.

I find it funny that no one has said that they dont see a problem with meeting in a private place. I havent done a whole lot of internet dating, and already I have had 2 men insist on meeting in a private place.

So where are all the proponents of this? I want to hear your side....


Does common sense suggest to you that meeting a complete stranger in a private place is perfectly ok? Sorry "meeting" someone online doesn't count. An online "persona" can be very different from a real live person.


Of course I would NEVER meet someone in a private place. I am just curious as to who does engage in such risky behavior, and why they do. This is my only reason for this post. Obviously there are those that do it. I just want to hear their justification.


Or at least those who attempt to get others to do it. bigsmile

TheShadow's photo
Fri 01/29/10 09:51 AM
To the OP,I was sitting here thinking about your question. Then I stopped myself and started thinking, why would I myself really want to know this question. Nothing ment to you, but for me it's looking at what I don't ever want to feel. If people are like this and they are. Better them then me. I like being happy. So if i'm going to meet someone I want them to feel comfortable. I guess over all, what is even the point of getting upset at all knowing, that we or the person were going to meet don't even know each other.

no photo
Fri 01/29/10 02:07 PM

To the OP,I was sitting here thinking about your question. Then I stopped myself and started thinking, why would I myself really want to know this question. Nothing ment to you, but for me it's looking at what I don't ever want to feel. If people are like this and they are. Better them then me. I like being happy. So if i'm going to meet someone I want them to feel comfortable. I guess over all, what is even the point of getting upset at all knowing, that we or the person were going to meet don't even know each other.


I just like to know what makes people tick.

Goofball73's photo
Fri 01/29/10 02:58 PM
Meet them for put put golf. That way, you can get a good feel for the person, and then if they start to act a fool, whack them one time with the club.:tongue: laugh