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| Topic: The missing element | |
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I'm sure we've all met lots of people that we've chatted to for a while, either on a dating site or IM, but then, when you meet, things just don't work out.
What, for you, is the most common reason that you don't pursue a relationship? For me, it's chemistry. That 'physical spark'. It doesn't matter whether you share common interests, goals, or whatever. If that spark's not there, it's just not going to happen! It's frustrating when you meet people you like but that spark is just missing. |
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That's the beautiful thing about chemistry, it's either there or it isn't....can't force it.
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I can get a long with pretty much anyone. So for me, and it may sound shallow but looks is initially what I go for. I can try and overlook it if a guy is hilarious, but even then it's still hard. I know it sounds shallow but if I can't see myself making out with them like french kissing because they have bad teeth or too many craters, then it's a no go.
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Gawd you ladies are shallow
 JK 
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LOL. Yes, I'm the first to admit it does sound shallow. But when you meet someone who's personality you really like, but they just aren't capable of 'turning you on', what can you do?
I guess, ultimately, we're all still primitive at heart! |
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Looks come first, but for me it's just a question of getting used to a new face: I don't have any aesthetical mold I want women to fit, luckily for both.
I do have, though, pretty tight standards about intellectual depth: "outgoing, easy-going and fun-loving" just won't cut it. They're nice extras (in small doses) but what I really want is depth and passion. I'm a honest person and I offer both depth and passion about the things I care for - my passion for another individual is hard to earn, but once earned it's there to stay. |
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When they go bat s*** crazy...yep, that will kill it.
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Meet someone? Wish I could get THAT far...
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The spark. Gotta have it. Even beyond being able to sit and talk with someone, there has to be that additional spark that makes it even more.
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I'm sure we've all met lots of people that we've chatted to for a while, either on a dating site or IM, but then, when you meet, things just don't work out. What, for you, is the most common reason that you don't pursue a relationship? For me, it's chemistry. That 'physical spark'. It doesn't matter whether you share common interests, goals, or whatever. If that spark's not there, it's just not going to happen! It's frustrating when you meet people you like but that spark is just missing. When you meet someone online you are only meeting a part of them. After you know them in real life, they may be completely different. |
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I do have, though, pretty tight standards about intellectual depth: "outgoing, easy-going and fun-loving" just won't cut it. They're nice extras (in small doses) but what I really want is depth and passion. I'm a honest person and I offer both depth and passion about the things I care for - my passion for another individual is hard to earn, but once earned it's there to stay. I like this answer, and I'd have to echo the sentiments about intellectual depth. Having read 12,882,092,313 profiles of women who are "laid back and easy going," I'd prefer to meet someone who had enough going on upstairs to assemble her own sequence of words instead of using everyone else's. |
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I've only met a few people on line and went on a date in real life. One was missing a personality. One was missing everything but a sex drive. And one was just right.
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I do have, though, pretty tight standards about intellectual depth: "outgoing, easy-going and fun-loving" just won't cut it. They're nice extras (in small doses) but what I really want is depth and passion. I'm a honest person and I offer both depth and passion about the things I care for - my passion for another individual is hard to earn, but once earned it's there to stay. I like this answer, and I'd have to echo the sentiments about intellectual depth. Having read 12,882,092,313 profiles of women who are "laid back and easy going," I'd prefer to meet someone who had enough going on upstairs to assemble her own sequence of words instead of using everyone else's. I am not laid back and not easy going. Marry me? 
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I do have, though, pretty tight standards about intellectual depth: "outgoing, easy-going and fun-loving" just won't cut it. They're nice extras (in small doses) but what I really want is depth and passion. I'm a honest person and I offer both depth and passion about the things I care for - my passion for another individual is hard to earn, but once earned it's there to stay. I like this answer, and I'd have to echo the sentiments about intellectual depth. Having read 12,882,092,313 profiles of women who are "laid back and easy going," I'd prefer to meet someone who had enough going on upstairs to assemble her own sequence of words instead of using everyone else's. I am not laid back and not easy going. Marry me? Well, if I was ever planning on getting married again, you'd be at the top of the list!  |
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Edited by
tanyaann
on
Sat 08/28/10 05:02 PM
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I am not laid back and not easy going. Marry me? Well, if I was ever planning on getting married again, you'd be at the top of the list! 
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That's the beautiful thing about chemistry, it's either there or it isn't....can't force it. I agree. Someone just can't explain himself into a relationship. If there is a missing chemistry..and you sense it is missing, and yet the person insist to go on, there are other motives taking him or her. It's not you, something else that by being with you is advantageous to her or him. This is also a disadvantage to you. Basically you've been played and tried to be fooled. |
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Resonance - Kindred Knowing - Tribal Re-Membering ...
 ... ... That goes for ALL my deepest relationships! They were family even before we met "this time" ...   ... EXTREMELY Olde Ancient Souls ... ALL the rest are lovely, or not so lovely, acquaintances ... |
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I'm sure we've all met lots of people that we've chatted to for a while, either on a dating site or IM, but then, when you meet, things just don't work out. What, for you, is the most common reason that you don't pursue a relationship? For me, it's chemistry. That 'physical spark'. It doesn't matter whether you share common interests, goals, or whatever. If that spark's not there, it's just not going to happen! It's frustrating when you meet people you like but that spark is just missing. |
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I do have, though, pretty tight standards about intellectual depth: "outgoing, easy-going and fun-loving" just won't cut it. They're nice extras (in small doses) but what I really want is depth and passion. I'm a honest person and I offer both depth and passion about the things I care for - my passion for another individual is hard to earn, but once earned it's there to stay. I like this answer, and I'd have to echo the sentiments about intellectual depth. Having read 12,882,092,313 profiles of women who are "laid back and easy going," I'd prefer to meet someone who had enough going on upstairs to assemble her own sequence of words instead of using everyone else's.
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If she has the phat azz, then I'm hooked.
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