sports

Toenail fungus?

Adult diapers?

E D meds?

Only if you're in a hot tub.

When the restroom is clogged.

When the guys are talking about how much libido they have.

What are some good small talk topics you've found to be helpful ice breakers in social situations where you may not know many people?

films/movies; fashion; how to do away with one's boss; bizarre co-workers; food; drugs; sport: should sex be allowed as an Olympic sport? How social services are all dysfunctional and managed by idiots and criminals; should NASA flights to Mars be racially balanced, not forgetting Native Americans, Arabic Americans, Orientals and anti gun lobbyists; make-up for men; would it be inappropriate to pack swim suits and pool toys for the trip to Mars drinking hair tonics, perfumes or after-shave lotions for cheap highs; do garter belt stocking fasteners go on under a woman's panties or over them...the list is potentially endless as it is hilarious. Use your imagination!..Hey, Cheech, pass me another joint, man!

But Traumer, some of those might be better used AFTER you've broken the ice....

....with your new cell or asylum mates.

If you're in a store, buying a certain CD, by one of your favourite bands/singers, sometimes someone will come up to you and say something like "Oooh, I love them", so you get talking about it. Or when I let my dog into the front garden, people see it through the gaps of the bars in my gate, and that has passers-by asking me all about him. I've been to group therapy before, and it was nice to just be able to vent to people who had more time to listen. I prefer group therapy, to one on one, as you can conversate with other phobics.

My therapist told me a way to achieve inner peace was to finish things that I had started. Today I finished two bags of potato chips, a chocolate cake, a half bottle of bourbon and a cartoon video of Betty Boop that had been sitting in my VCR for 3 weeks. I feel much better already.

Well, if a bona fide therapist says so...then I guess the healthiest thing for me to do is finish this bottle of wine I just opened.

My therapist told me a way to achieve inner peace was to finish things that I had started. Today I finished two bags of potato chips, a chocolate cake, a half bottle of bourbon and a cartoon video of Betty Boop that had been sitting in my VCR for 3 weeks. I feel much better already.

Serial killers.

This is why "They" lock me here in this room and tell me "See? See why we can't let you have nice things?"

No, but honestly...It doesn't matter what I break the ice with as soon as the question of "What do you like to do?" is followed by the answer "I like to study serial killers." Well, I mean, it doesn't typically go too far past that point.

I had a friend once that whenever he saw a dead bird, he would pick it up and give it a proper burial or cremate it. He lost some girlfriends over that. He also liked to hurt people emotionally; he said it gave him a kick; we both used to place fake obituaries in papers of people who we didn't like, especially at work. We uses to make lists of people who had either hurt us, judged us or angered us and other things. The lists once had over two hundred names on them. The hit lists were for alleviation...but the hate was real. We were 15 or so at the time. We did all sorts of things together, but the one thing that I stopped was going with him to the hardware store because he would roam up and down isles fantasizing over the different tools to kill people with; 15 minutes at least always in the hammer section. Different strokes as they say. He went on seven tours during the Vietnam war and was arrested for sending his mother ears...he later became a grief counselor...go figure.