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| Topic: Permanent scars | |
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I think the rather long list of my scars would be rather boring. To many who have not had that kind of life unbelievable. So will just say "Scars are the lace of life." and not dwell on things that have little meaning out of context.
The past is only the predictor of the future if you remain stuck in the same patterns that created the failures to occur. You can learn and live. I do however believe we personally assign the "value" or "devaluation" of most of the scars we experience. Others may find them fleetingly interesting but become desensitized rather fast so we should not make too much of them either way if you survive. Psychological and physical healing is possible in even the most acute situations. It may not be the healing in terms some people use to define it but if it satisfies ones own then that seems to be what matters. The greatest suffering is really just kicking the "dead horse" after it can neither carry you or stomp you again. Will evil always exist in the world? Of course. Will it hurt if we encounter it again? Yes. But I refuse to become so paranoid to dig my own grave and live more dead than alive in terror when it is more likely that I am wiser and stronger and will avoid evil now that I know it exists. It may not feel like great justice at the time to just walk away from a bad experience but if you keep giving your present and future over to your past victimizer then your later misery is self inflicted. Why? because you deprive yourself the greatest victory of enjoying what was not taken. Bad experiences or injuries may disrupt your life, limit your life for a time, but if you live and grow from them they can not "ruin" your life or even tarnish it. Often the empathy and understanding you gain from scars actually make you a better person. More often than not we learn more from failure than success. I don't know where the definition of a REAL therapist ever was written to only be "listen and comfort" because REAL healing therapy rarely is passive of comfortable and often is exhausting because when you do the "work" to heal from anything it takes energy and pushing muscles , emotional or physical, to strengthen them. If someone is just placating you with pretending to listen and care without challenging you to find your own strength then you are being ripped off by nothing but a note taker. |
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I do not think it is possible to exist without some scars. Physically, emotionally or mentally. How you are able to fade those scars and accept that we all have them will determine how and if they affect your future.
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Most of my scars came from the fact that I was so unpopular elementary, junior high and high school that every one knew who I and I got my butt kick at least once a week sometimes more.
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Most of my scars came from the fact that I was so unpopular elementary, junior high and high school that every one knew who I and I got my butt kick at least once a week sometimes more. This kind of abuse of children makes me so angry and I wish that there was some way I could tell anyone how sorry I am that they have to endure this stuff. Not that I feel sorry for them as pity but that I am acknowledging it is wrong and they have aright to feel betrayed. All I know is I think you honor people who have been abused by trying to prevent it from happening any more. It is where someone who wants to; I don't believe ANYONE, victims especially, have to speak up, but I do think this is the only way it is anything more than just lip service to say you care if you don't. For me personally it does give me a sense of reclaiming my power to say no for those who can't. |
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Most of my scars came from the fact that I was so unpopular elementary, junior high and high school that every one knew who I and I got my butt kick at least once a week sometimes more. Yow - you definitely had it worse than I did.  I'll bet you turned into a pretty decent fighter though.   I knew better than to get deeply involved with rodeo,  so I don't have a ton of scars. I picked up 3 or 4 when I wrecked my bike into a car... Have a couple of nearly-invisible scars on one hand where I had to have pins put in to repair a boxer's fracture... Just a couple years later, I tore ligaments away from the bone in my wrist - that did some damage...  Heh - this thread reminds me of one of the songs that I'll sometimes play on the way to my workout class - gets me all psyched for a good workout!  
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I think the rather long list of my scars would be rather boring. To many who have not had that kind of life unbelievable. So will just say "Scars are the lace of life." and not dwell on things that have little meaning out of context. The past is only the predictor of the future if you remain stuck in the same patterns that created the failures to occur. You can learn and live. I do however believe we personally assign the "value" or "devaluation" of most of the scars we experience. Others may find them fleetingly interesting but become desensitized rather fast so we should not make too much of them either way if you survive. Psychological and physical healing is possible in even the most acute situations. It may not be the healing in terms some people use to define it but if it satisfies ones own then that seems to be what matters. The greatest suffering is really just kicking the "dead horse" after it can neither carry you or stomp you again. Will evil always exist in the world? Of course. Will it hurt if we encounter it again? Yes. But I refuse to become so paranoid to dig my own grave and live more dead than alive in terror when it is more likely that I am wiser and stronger and will avoid evil now that I know it exists. It may not feel like great justice at the time to just walk away from a bad experience but if you keep giving your present and future over to your past victimizer then your later misery is self inflicted. Why? because you deprive yourself the greatest victory of enjoying what was not taken. Bad experiences or injuries may disrupt your life, limit your life for a time, but if you live and grow from them they can not "ruin" your life or even tarnish it. Often the empathy and understanding you gain from scars actually make you a better person. More often than not we learn more from failure than success. I don't know where the definition of a REAL therapist ever was written to only be "listen and comfort" because REAL healing therapy rarely is passive of comfortable and often is exhausting because when you do the "work" to heal from anything it takes energy and pushing muscles , emotional or physical, to strengthen them. If someone is just placating you with pretending to listen and care without challenging you to find your own strength then you are being ripped off by nothing but a note taker. .. I might have to borrow that .. if you don't mind slice of life inevitable
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Most of my scars came from the fact that I was so unpopular elementary, junior high and high school that every one knew who I and I got my butt kick at least once a week sometimes more. This kind of abuse of children makes me so angry and I wish that there was some way I could tell anyone how sorry I am that they have to endure this stuff. Not that I feel sorry for them as pity but that I am acknowledging it is wrong and they have aright to feel betrayed. All I know is I think you honor people who have been abused by trying to prevent it from happening any more. It is where someone who wants to; I don't believe ANYONE, victims especially, have to speak up, but I do think this is the only way it is anything more than just lip service to say you care if you don't. For me personally it does give me a sense of reclaiming my power to say no for those who can't. The saddest part is when the victims of bullying feel their only option is to become the aggressor and attempt to retaliate with stolen guns because the system has failed them. |
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Most of my scars came from the fact that I was so unpopular elementary, junior high and high school that every one knew who I and I got my butt kick at least once a week sometimes more. This kind of abuse of children makes me so angry and I wish that there was some way I could tell anyone how sorry I am that they have to endure this stuff. Not that I feel sorry for them as pity but that I am acknowledging it is wrong and they have aright to feel betrayed. All I know is I think you honor people who have been abused by trying to prevent it from happening any more. It is where someone who wants to; I don't believe ANYONE, victims especially, have to speak up, but I do think this is the only way it is anything more than just lip service to say you care if you don't. For me personally it does give me a sense of reclaiming my power to say no for those who can't. The saddest part is when the victims of bullying feel their only option is to become the aggressor and attempt to retaliate with stolen guns because the system has failed them. yes that is why it is so important for adult volunteers to work on school campuses and see what is going on and give a kid a friendly face to talk to. I remember being so grateful for our school janitor hanging around when the "mean girl stuff started" just his presence slowed that stuff down. |
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Heh - this thread reminds me of one of the songs that I'll sometimes play on the way to my workout class - gets me all psyched for a good workout! I just realized that the above link probably doesn't work because it contains a dash (or hyphen) character. That SHOULD have worked like this (crossing my fingers): Heh - this thread reminds me of one of the songs that I'll sometimes play on the way to my workout class...
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I have a few scars, too.
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Edited by
Spike1964
on
Sun 12/20/15 12:00 PM
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Got a few tiny scares nothing anybody would notice ones on my foot from sharp rock on the beach another from a
Fall down a cliff knocked myself out got small scare on my head was chasing after a kite that was a fun day in Cornwall lol. Have no other types of scares I'm blessed. |
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I believe nobody gets out of this world unscathed, it could be physically, emotionally or mentally. I have garnered a lot of scars since childhood until now, and I consider it the prize of life , from all the experiences I have gone through, the scars (visible and invisible) served as a lesson for me on how to get up, bear the pain, heal myself, fight or try again and face whatever challenges life will throw at me. Some Scars may have healed badly forming a kelloid, oh what a disgusting look, but it's a souvenir, a memory of a painful experience that you have once overcome and it made you more brave and stronger......not bad at all
Most of the scars I got where scratches from running and tripping, playing basketball and falling from the stairs where I got 5 stitches on my forehead , ouch it really was painful but I learned to get up, compete and fight with life's challenges. As for the invisible scar, my heart and my brain are luckily not totally damaged only hardened a little and sharpened, now I am gifted with knowledge and wisdom  
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Physical scar
i was about 5-6yrs old i remember this well the neighbor cat just had kittens and i went over there and pick up one of the kittens mamma was not happy she scratch me on my face and came close of hitting my eye of course the scar is still there emotionally scars YES!! which we all do but i wish not to mention mine and i hope you would understand |
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Physical scar i was about 5-6yrs old i remember this well the neighbor cat just had kittens and i went over there and pick up one of the kittens mamma was not happy she scratch me on my face and came close of hitting my eye of course the scar is still there emotionally scars YES!! which we all do but i wish not to mention mine and i hope you would understand And keeping scars physical or emotional private is always a person's foremost right. One of the things I like MOST about Mingle is that is respected. Another is many here are kind and supportive. Even if they have different life experiences. Many of us know life is not always easy and most of us have had loss at one time or another or understand sometimes things do seem more lonely or difficult and try to deal with it with honesty, sharing, and caring with a dash of humor at the level that is hopefully comfortable. |
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The few I have on my body hurt less then the ones on my soul, but I learned from all of them.
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that is because in order to be a warrior in life
we will all carry battle scars |
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that is because in order to be a warrior in life we will all carry battle scars Very true. You sit at home in your nice little safe cocoon you are not going to get bruised or scared. Personally I have the theory if I slide into heaven a little scarred up I have just lived a full life. lol |
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