the difference I see is 'race' is something that one can do nothing about

not like BO, or poor hygiene, or other things that may singularly rule an individual out



so when one singles out one thing that an individual had some control over, its quite different than ruling out a whole group over a trait they have no control over

and because that one individual may come back later an no longer have that one thing that turns us off


and online, when we are looking at hundreds and hundreds of people, photos are only a way of 'narrowing' down the options and not the same as actual RT choices when we are getting to know the individual

for me,, race is a special 'category' for one to discriminate against because its socially constructed and not a 'thing' at all when it comes to individuals


so , to me, since we date individuals and not demographics, to pass over anyone that belongs to a racial demographic is sad enough,, but when that racial demographic is the very one we belong too,, it borders on self hatred


,,just my opinion though

what part are you not sure about?

everyone has it's own choose ..u like what attracts the most it's strong feeling and its fact... black guys do find white girls attractive most..because of indifferce not because of racial u guess..

Sorry lol. I understood what you meant afterwards but it didnt delete for some reason lol. I agree with you actually . And I also am very open to dating other races. It's all about the compatibility and connection

And I respect your opinion

My take on it is that most of us DO base our dating choices on demographics . Often we choose not to date people for physical characteristics over which they have no control. Sexual attraction is something organic and often superficially physical. We reject people sexually on the basis of features like height, a wide or protruding forehead or wide set eyes or a broad nose etc because we choose what is organically appeals to us. I am sorry if this offends anyone but black women commonly have prominent posteriors and if a white man or even a black man is not attracted to that feature, he is not likely to date black women. And you may say but there are many black women with small behinds, but REALISTICALLY, they are the exception to the rule and those exceptions may not be geographically accessible to the man in question. the heart wants what it wants and we disqualify people romantically on single physical traits ALL THE TIME. We insist on a certain height, the shape of eyes and lips etc -things that we have little to no control over and why should people feel condemned for rejecting what they are not organically drawn to just because it is offensive to a racial group? And there are other demographics we disqualify romantically based on other demographics like careers for example and you may say that you have control over changing a career but why should you have to if thats what you love? For many years for eg, I have been close minded to the idea of dating someone in the law enforcement services and its not because of the danger of their jobs, but it is because that particular demographic in my country are infamous for having several partners at one time. And yet I am fully aware that that there are possibly hundreds of men in my country who are the exception, but I am personally not willing to take the chance. Similarly, there are many people who have decided to dismiss any individual belonging to one of the countries we associate with online scamming. Most of the "Dissmissers" know that not EVERYBODY from that country is a con artist , but because it is rampant they have decided not to take a chance. My point is that our sexual or romantic dismissal of people often have grounds that are legitimate and real to us and even when race is taken out of the equation, we still romantically disqualify groups of people based on other demographics . It is just a reality of dating. People will date who they are organically drawn to or who they are willing to take a chance on and I dont feel personal choices which are not hurting anybody else should be subject to condemnation.

to each their own, there's beauty/ugly - good/bad in all races, we are all the same in that aspect...

to each their own, there's beauty/ugly - good/bad in all races, we are all the same in that aspect...

Well this white girl gave her heart to a Syrian boy . It was never a planned .. calculated or tactical move .. . It was pure attraction . Race was not a prerequisite and it certainly was not at the exclusion of my own bioological race . .. I did not join mingle with the intention of seeking out a man from the middle east .. ..or of rejecting men from my own culture .. no sympathy is warranted for the British or kiwi men .... To imply it is sad that i did not choose a man from my own culture . . Is absurd and judgmental . The chemistry we share speaks for itself and that we chose each other requires no validation from others .

I respect your opinon always as you express yourself with a consistently logical and humble opinion

I cannot help but judge,, but do not mean it to come across as condemnation

I feel individuals within any racial demographic have more differences than those between racial demographics,, and to exclude all the individuals on some ideal of a racial appearance is silly and especially sad if that race is own:





I can see from your posts that your heart beat is toward a society that gives every individual and group in the world an equal chance... And that is the common thread that will bind you and I for life But the dating world isnt based on equality. It is based on preference . I really do understand where you are coming from and why you would think, some of the bases for people's sexual /romantic choices are silly or unfair, but taking race out of it, the whole basis for sexual chemical reactions is often "silly" ...and embarrassingly superficial lol. Take our eloquent speech away and our stuffy clothes off, and we are often dogs in heat seduced by pheremonal emissions that ONLY the the dog in pursuit and the doggy respondent can see. ...

I can not tell you how many times getting to know a person has caused them to BECOME attractive to me,, there is no natural born trait that prevents me from being open to becoming attractive to an attractive person,,,,its not all about any one feature(which race is of course not actually a feature, physically) but about the totality of the individuals behaviors, hygienes, preferences, values,,etc,,,