We all have our preferences, don’t we? Yes, we do. Even when we attempt to find love in places including dating sites, dating apps, or a hook-up night out, we have these subtle biases such as, “I am looking for someone caring, fashionable, and who has a sense of independence”, and so on. But how do you attract the right dating partner for yourself, as you hope? Other than riches (or a stable source of income) and a promising career, many people aren’t sure about what they really want in a partner. Here are some dating tips to consider or adopt.
1. Have a clear direction about what you want and prioritise:
Many times, people aren’t always sincere with themselves. They want many things at a time, which may be unrealistic, and sometimes, the lack of a clear focus on certain things lets them go for “any option” available. Quite essentially, you should prioritise the features on your list. Although everyone has biases, for certain things, we can get caught up in other things. For example, in the bid to get a partner who is sexy, handsome, independent and unreasonable, you end up seeing a fine and handsome man and you feel he has to be the one, and you swing into a relationship, you will hurt yourself eventually if he ends up being a beauty without brain. So, know what you want and prioritise the features.
2. Build a true profile:
A true profile is a key point on this list. Although it may seem to be more applicable to online dating, it is not exclusive; a profile refers to a person’s personality and how they choose to portray themselves. Keeping an honest profile makes it easy for you to get someone that will love you for who you are. You don’t want to start a relationship based on lies. You, as well, would want someone with an honest profile. Isn’t it?
3. Be determined:
Whatever it is that you don’t want, then you should have a mind to be determined that you wouldn’t take it from anyone who would be your partner. This way, you do not have to patch a conduct or attitude, saving yourself from a waste of time.
4. Adopt positive attitudes:
Have you ever wondered why some people are naturally lovable? Well, it is not a star sign. It is just that there is an attitude, which easily shows on the face about certain things and makes people like them. If you want to get a good partner, easily, then you should adopt positive attitudes including being grateful, smiling, appreciating, giving impressionable compliments, and other things.
5. Be happy:
No matter where you choose to get your date from, please, do not make the decision to find a partner when you are not stable on the emotional aisle of happiness. Release negative energies. Forgive yourself and your past. Do not brood over past mistakes; see them as lessons learned and move on, a step at a time. Hence, begin to find happiness in yourself and things that make you happy. Being emotionally vulnerable when you get into a relationship can land you in the hands of a partner who tries to take advantage of your emotion and may not to help you heal, necessarily. Therefore, you may have to stay away from your favourite heartbreak songs, which ideally traps you more in sadness; get a new playlist that will inspire you and create positive energy vibes of happiness for you.
6. Be optimistic:
By optimism, I mean in a realistic way. You should believe that you deserve a good partner and you will get one. You should be optimistic about your plans, your future and the investments you are making to secure the future. This helps to build your positive energy.
7. Invest in yourself:
You will do yourself well by investing in yourself to develop yourself. Get good stuff for yourself and get relevant skills that will make you self-sufficient or independent. People feel obsessed with a relationship where they are the one that would keep investing in the partner to make them better. Eventually, it leads to frustrations in relationships and the dependant may be oppressed and hopeless. Certainly, this is not the kind of dating relationship that you want to be in, let alone a marriage.
The rule is, if you would want someone who is fit, invest in bodybuilding too. If you want someone who is socially active, you should also belong to a cycle of influencers yourself. And if you want someone who is rich, it is reputable that you also build your brand to a reputable income-generating level, too.
8. Be lovable, yourself:
Hey, everyone appreciates someone who holds himself or herself as being lovable. So, you need to build yourself to wear an aura of lovable consciousness. You like lovable people, right? That’s exactly how others love lovable people too. You can’t continue to live in pain/bitterness and say “I want someone that would love me like that”. No. Every human has a chance for a change. So, you can gradually learn to change too. Thinking of where to start from? Read the 5th point again.
9. Be a good conversationalist:
A conversationalist is one who listens well and engages with their conversation. This is a top-notch skill you need to develop in the current age. Being a good listener will help you catch important information about your date and know if the ride would be worth it with them. Although partners in a relationship should be mutually conversational, however, in a worst-case scenario, one of them must be a good conversationalist.
In conclusion, the law of magnets -like poles repel, while unlike poles attract- is not very much the same for relationships. Like poles (should) attract in a relationship. That strengthens understanding between the parties involved. This article has shared tips on how to attract the right partner for you. And certainly, the tips would work if you are having a hook up set by friends, or you are meeting on free dating sites, online dating apps, or in a religious setting.