I have an awesome idea for a gift but it's definately for a later relationship type gift but it takes a lot of prep.

Get a dvd camcorder and just use it quite a bit throughout the relationship and then once you've been together for a long time (assuming you get to that point) edit it, add music or whatever and make a dvd.

So YOU'RE the one who won't kiss this guy...that's mean lol.

No rings, no jewlery unless it's a pretty cheap but cool looking piece. I think the best gifts are the gifts that show you've listened to her, perhaps she's mentioned something she likes.

Victoria Secrets is awesome lol. Yes it's a gift for you but it is a gift for her as well. But it's more of a after you've had sex type gift I think, otherwise she might take it as pressure for sex. But lingerie's great, makes a girl feel sexy and I think it loosens up inhibitions, like it allows her to be in a fantasy.

Hmm mix a cd for her? Make a meal for her? some socks perhaps lol.

I wouldn't, you talked to her earlier already and let her know that she could call if she wanted to. Don't turn into "that" guy.

Usually I don't put much into the whole wait 3 days things. If I have fun talking to a girl I'll call her back right away. But if I make it known that she can call me if she wants to, the ball's in her court.

You should sleep with all his friends. You might not know it but I was one of his friends.

sorry not really a joking topic, but I agree with tulsa. A lot of women fall for jerks cause a lot of nice guys are too scared to come up and talk to women, sometimes we just don't want to look like jerks and playas. The jerks probably have more practice hitting on girls so they're more comfortable doing it. Which is what kills me when women complain about PUA (pick up artists) or dating coaches who try to help nice guys be more confident in approaching women.

If the nice guys knew how to do it women would meet a lot more of them.

That makes you automatically 1000 times better than the last date I had, and NO I do NOT want to talk about it.

*curls up in fetal position and sobs*

We're just a scared bunch of wusses. Sorry to say but the women here got more balls than us.

thanks man,

16. When you're teasing him, telling him your vibrator is broken and you need something to use to get off....he won't get the hint and he'll go fix it. (actually this could go into either category now that I think about it)

Had to add more here cause I added more to the other one, you understand right? It's a yin yang thing deal with it roundeye.

15. If he pisses you off just put the condoms on the top shelf and leave a childrens Thomas the train step stool nearby, it's quite emasculating to have to use a fisher price toy when you want to have sex.

16. coutesy of a friend: free pedicures and manicures,

17. Asian countries have a time zone difference of 12 hours so there's only about 3 hour window for his family to complain about the "gwai lo", it means ghost person, or whitey.

18. Chinese New Years is based on a lunar calender it's between Jan 21 and Feb 20th. You aren't expected to know exactly which date so you might as well binge drink and celebrate for a full month.

addition (just a quick note, additions are usually made when someone says or does things in my real life that make me want to punch them for abject stupidity)

13. You may go Deaf from having people yell at you. For some reason people think that if you don't understand english they think you'll understand LOUDER english. I speak and comprehend english just fine thank you very much, it's stupid that I have a hard time understanding.

14. Our hairstyles are taken directly from anime movies, which is pretty cool looking, but they might take out your eye. Better wear safety goggles to bed. (on the plus side we find that sexy)

15. Foreplay will consist of sequentially harder higher order mathematics...eh not that bad though cause what that other guy does is just as boring.

the one in the middle. I'm a powerful mindreader. Actually I just clicked and saw her other pics.

wow this board moves fast, now I just look like a douche....eh it happens a lot with me.

something I wrote awhile back after my father had passed, it's something I read from time to time to remind myself about the important things in life amongst the drudgery of doing the 9-5 and all the miniscule chores. Just wanted to pass it on:

Sometimes the world is cold and dark. Somedays nothing seems to go right and it feels as though the hole is too deep, the hill too steep. Sometimes the demons seem too strong and they cut through your heart and strangle your soul. It is during these times that the grace and love of those who care for you will illuminate the path, however, you are the only one that can make the choice to accept their hand and lift yourself from darkness.

"you are now at a crossroads. This is your opportunity to make the most important decision you will make. Forget your past. Who are you now?Who have you decided you really are now? Don't think about who you have been. Who are you now? Who have you decided to become? Make this decision consciously. Make it carefully. Make it Powerfully"
Anthony Robbins

Life is a great gift. It allows one to feel the exhiliration of achievement, the love of friends and family, the cheer of a beautiful day, the gentle kiss of a loved one. It is a responsibility, an obligation. A life that is spent with grace, love, charity in the heart is truly worthwhile. Be free of your time, be free of your wealth and love. Love is infinite...the more you give, the more there is and the world becomes a better place. Know that you DO matter, you count, you can make a difference. You may not win a war, or save a rainforest but those you touch with laughter, those you comfort with compassion...you will mean the world to them. And that positivity will vibrate outward and continue to touch others. You do matter...the things you do will affect others and yourself.

Each day you have an infinate number of choices to make. Will you walk the path of mediocrity? Will you fall to the demons? Will you lie, cheat, steal, or hurt others? or Will you work hard? Will you touch those around you ina positive manner? Only you can decide.

"destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved"

William Jenning Bryan

Life is an opportunity. Embrace it, make it worthwhile, the things you do only for yourself will die when you die, the things you do for others will live on in eternity. True greatness does not come from wealth, it doesn't come from strength of weapons, nor does it stem from intelligence. True greatness comes from living a worthy life, one in which you enlighten the lives of others, one in which you make the world a better place to be in just by loving your fellow man, aiding those in need, being there for the people that matter to you. True greatness is not measured by what you have...it is measured by what you give.

I don't remember if I posted this before, if I have, sorry for the double post, just tryin to lighten up the atmosphere here.

Things we say and what we mean by them a rosetta stone to understanding just what the fuk your other half is trying to tell you:

Woman: We need to talk.
What it means: I need to talk, scream, yell, or cry YOU need to sit there and just listen, just nod your head in agreement God help you if you even think about arguing with me.

Man: We need to talk.
What it means: I want to have sex with someone else, or I have already been having sex with someone else, I wouldn't even be telling you this but it has become abundantly clear that trying to have sex with you is way more trouble than its worth.

Man: I think we should try something to spice up our love life
Meaning: your friend is hot, and I want to have a threesome

Woman: i think we should try something to spice up our love life
Meaning: You have long ago abandoned any attempt at foreplay.Not that you did that much of it to begin with. And that one move you keep trying...STOP IT, I am not a porno chick.

Man: you have beautiful eyes
Meaning: Nice tits

Man: you have a nice smile
Meaning: Nice tits

Woman: you have nice eyes
Meaning: that's one expensive watch you got on

Woman: you have a nice smile
Meaning: Those shoes look expensive too.

Man: Whew I had a rough day at work
Meaning: I want you to give me a blow job

Woman: Whew I had a rough day at work
Meaning: You had better ask me about my day and then shut the fuk up and listen. If you ask me for a blow job tonight I will be kicking you in square in the junk so do yourself a favor and just shut the fuk up and give me a back rub and foot massage.

Woman: Do these pants make me look fat?
Meaning: I'm insecure and need you to reassure me that I'm physically appealing. I will kill you in your sleep if you do not answer correctly. I don't throw out freebie questions like this very often so you had better not **** it up.

Man: Do these pants make me look fat?
Meaning: I have just figured out that I'm gay.

Man: I have a headache tonight
Meaning: I already had sex with my secretary at work, now let me just go to sleep before I incriminate myself further.

Woman: I have a headache tonight
Meaning: Listen jerk off, I told you to stop doing that one move you keep trying, it hurts and it feels like an alien in probing me with a bowie knife, until you stop that **** you are not getting any.

Man: MMM we should cuddle
Meaning: I have finally been able to get her to sleep with me, I better cuddle or else I ain't getting any tomorrow. Please don't fall asleep on her, please don't fall asleep on her, please don't fall asleep on her

Woman: mmm we should cuddle
Meaning: If you don't give me some cuddle time you sure ain't getting any tomorrow. If you fall asleep on me I promise you that you'll never even wake up to see tomorrow.

Woman: i think we should see other people
meaning: i've already been seeing other people

Man:I think we should see other people
meaning: I've already been seeing other people

Man: You have a great personality
meaning: you're fat or flat as a board, but I'm in the midst of a dry spell and I'll take what I can get

Woman: You have a great personality
meaning: I don't want to have sex with you. But feel free to listen to me yap about my emotions, ambitions, my complaints about my other girlfriends or my b****ing about that asshole I'm actually having sex with.

Man: I love you
meaning: I have figured out that I am no longer attractive to any other women, so I guess I'm stuck with you.

Woman: I love you
meaning: GOTCHA

Abusive behavior is different, the OP mentions players not abusers. I've never been on those sites so I can't say if they only talk about abusers but I'm betting no. Some women are really vindictive and if they have a bad breakup or something with a guy they'll go out of their way to smear him. Some guys do the same with the women they date, once emotions get involved people just aren't as objective or reasonable as they should be. To only listen to one side is close minded.

I dated a girl who I felt was a bit of a gold digger, she never wanted to pay for anything and would complain that I'd cook for her but wasn't taking her to expensive restaurants (I just don't have that kind of money) or buy gifts. She probably thought I was cheap and wanted to sleep with her without "treating her right". 2 sides to every story.

I think some guys can pull off long hair some can't. I like to keep mine pretty short. I think taller guys are able to pull off the look better. Short guys with long hair end up looking shorter. But if you have a receding hair line, go with the shaved look, seriously, I don't care if your hair is made of solid gold, or gives you god like strength, nobody looks good with the Hulk Hogan look.

If I only took the advice about my girlfriends from their exes I don't think I'd ever date. It's one thing if there's a long list of people who say the same thing about someone but if there's only one person, who's to say that that lady isn't a nut job.

If I had a bad date with someone or a bad experience with someone I still wouldn't go around smearing their name online, seems distasteful to me.

So that's the secret, pay for your drinks and shut the hell up.... I think I've already dated you.

Yes like when a young women is pulled into a train station at noon and raped (that happened in philly a while ago). Or someone get's their pocket picked, a student near where I work was sexually assulted at like 6 pm in a public building on campus recently....that kind of stuff makes me wary of strangers and careful of my surroundings. It's called common sense, there are a lot of scumbags in the world.

Different dynamic. In the vid, the guy holds up a sign for free hugs. he is being open to being hugged, he is not walking up to random people hugging them. He is not initiating the hugs, just allowing people to hug him and the other people are the ones hugging him. In this way, there is no invasion of space.

It's not space issues, I think most people would feel weird if someone just came up to them and started grabbing their hand.

Divorce yourself from the thought that confidence is based on success. Confidence is how you feel about yourself. Let's say you go up to a girl and stike out, one person might feel, oh I suck, I'm not attractive, I'm an idiot. Another person might feel oh well, we are not compatible so I'm better off at least now I know. Person 2 is confident that they had something to offer but that there was an incompatibility there, person 1 feels like they did something wrong or there is something wrong with them. It's just a shift in perception but that makes a difference in how one feels about themself which in turn influences how others think of them. This situation also touches on your second part where you mention separating the consequence.

You don't have to act like a jerk, nobody is telling you that that is a good idea. PUA ideas aren't set in stone. Some of the master PUAs disagree on a lot of things. Mix the parts of what they say that make sense to you with your natural personality. ie make it your own.

If confidence were solely based on success then those who haven't had success could never change and would be fated to a life of lonliness and misery unless they just got lucky and found a girl who was attracted to the guys leaning against the wall in the club not talking to anyone, not having fun, and being sullen. If you aren't confident you need to ACT like you are until it becomes a self fullfilling prophecy. It takes practice. I've begun to open up more to the world simply by smiling and saying hello, how's it going to people waiting for the train, or people at work who I don't know, or people in the grocery store. Look people in the eye, don't walk with your head down, be conscious of your posture and your body language and try to use confident body language until it's natural.

You control your own behavior, if you don't want to be rude, then don't. Disconnecting from consequence doesn't mean that you should be a jerk, it just means don't worry about being yourself. Be a good, honorable, "nice" guy, have confidence that you have something great to offer because of who you are, and then don't worry about people shooting you down cause there's nothing wrong with 2 people just not clicking, it's not a knock on you, it's just the way it is.