Community > Posts By > ckitchin

 
ckitchin's photo
Tue 03/11/08 10:50 AM

If you're "looking for a woman for intimate encounters", I'd take the kids names AND pictures off your profile... IMO.

Otherwise, BOL to ya...




Thanks but I'm also looking for friendship.And my kids are the biggest part of my life.If someone is looking at me for friendship, it's a package deal..

ckitchin's photo
Mon 03/10/08 10:41 PM

I can understand.....I always date older guys. They tend to be gentleman and more settled.


Not necessarily...I've dated a few that were more childish than my baby bro (4 yrs younger).

ckitchin's photo
Mon 03/10/08 10:17 PM

ummm if you are looking for partners for swapping, maybe try an adult site......


Thank you. We did try another site but alot of the people on there were so ignorant I don't know if I really want to try one of those sites again. We are also looking for friends...so I figured we would try here.

ckitchin's photo
Mon 03/10/08 10:16 PM

Try marrage couseling


We don't need marriage counseling. Our relationship is perfectly fine and so is our sex life...we just want to try some new things. What's so wrong about that?

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 10:55 PM

indifferent ohwell :tongue: not goin there......

been there before have you...laugh

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 10:54 PM

dont worry i thought it was funny


me too! I'm a homemaker and I don't take it personally...my husband thought it was hilarious..

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 10:53 PM
Purple horseshoes....not completly true but wanna try some....devil

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 10:24 PM
Hey new here.Anyone from GP or area???

By the way...

FLAMES KICK ASS!!!!

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 10:21 PM

calgary blows, same with thier **** ass sports teams


Why don't you bite me and get a real f*cking team.:tongue:

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 10:16 PM

dose any1 here loves the toronto toronto maple leaf and what do u all think about the team do they have what it takes to win or they need to shape up some more and play better


Sorry Flames fan all the way

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 10:12 PM
I have two kids..a little girl Emily 2yrs and a little boy Austin 3mo. (pics posted)

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 10:01 PM

flowerforyou If I find a girl can we set up a swap ??flowerforyou Hikerchicky done said she would go for it if I was there.flowerforyou Howabout it?flowerforyou

frown unfortunatley there is a huge distance problem...We're in Grande Prarie,Alberta.

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 09:59 PM


Helllo.I'm new here and I would like any possibe feedback so that my husband and I have a better sucess rate here than other sites.


Just to clarify, you and your husband are here, together, looking for dates?


That is correct

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 09:58 PM
It's doubtful but only because of the distanc....We're in Grande Prarie,Alberta. Trust me a wife swapping thing is something that has entered his mind..

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 08:42 PM
An old lady was rocking away the last of her days on her front porch, reflecting on her long life, when--all of a sudden-- a fairy godmother appeared in front of her and informed her that she would be granted three wishes.

"Well,now," said the old lady, "I guess I would like to ve really rich."

**POOF**

Her rocking chair turned to solid gold.

"And,gee, I guess I wouldn't mind being a young,beautiful princess."

**POOF**

She turned into a beautiful young woman.

"Your third wish?" asked the fairy godmother.

Just then the old woman's cat wandered across the porch in front of them.

"Ooh-- can you change him into a handsome young prince?" she asked.

**POOF**

There before her stood a young man more handsome than anyone could possibly imagine.

She stared at him,smitten. With a smile that made her knees weak, he sauntered across the porch and whispers in her ear.

"Bet you're sorry you had me neutered."

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 05:23 PM
Don't cheat! Before you read on, choose your favorite marshmallow bit from Lucky Charms from the list below:

Pink Hearts
Yellow Moons
Orange stars
Green Clovers
Blue Diamonds
Purple Horseshoes
Those icky oat bits

Okay.Have you got one in mind? Now you can read on. And don't change it!

An amazing new study shows that your favorite Lucky Charms marshmallow bit shape determines what you're like in bed!

Yes,it's true--just take this simple test to determine your true bedroom personality:

GREEN CLOVERS:You're a happy-go-lucky type in bed. You don't take anything too seriously in the bedroom or elsewhere and always manage to have a good time, even if you have someone else with you. You don't have any patience with depressed people and tend to sit on them until they cheer up.

BLUE DIAMONDS:Your thoughts in bed are mostly about what you'll get later. "If he really enjoys this,will he buy me that mink coat?" is probably what's going through your mind.People who like blue diamonds have a notebook of preprinted fill-in-the-blank palimony suit forms and are the people most likely to file their nails while making love.

ORANGE STARS:You expect to be the center of attention in bed. You expect your partner to spend most of his/her time pleasing you and when you do something for him/her, you expect enthusiastic moaning if not applause. People who like orange stars have mirrors over their beds,not because they are turned on by watching what is being done, but because they want to be able to watch themselves having a good time. They often moan out their own names while making love.

PINK HEARTS:You're the romantic type. You like your partner to whisper romantic phrases into your ear and, if he/she's too distracted to form coherent phrases, you'll settle for romantic syllables. People who like pink hearts read most of the romance novels published and are turned on by people wearing armor.

PURPLE HORSESHOES:Your tastes are modern,uninhibited,and somewhat warped.You like variety in the bedroom, especially when you can include handcuffs,chains,swingsets,and chocolate pudding. Be careful when going out on a picnic with anyone who likes purple horseshoes--she/he's likely to pin you down with croquet hoops when you're not looking and who knows what could happen next?

YELLOW MOONS:You're more interested in satisfying your partner's needs than your own. You prefer to lie back and wait for your partner to jump on you and express his/her needs verbally or nonverbally. People who like yellow moons usually own several pairs of handcuffs and other instruments of kinky sex just in case someone should ever want to tie them up and ravish them. Keep your eyes open for anyone who eats all the yellow moons out of his/her cereal as soon as he/she opens the box.

Those little oat bits that aren't marshmallows at all:You probalbly don't like sex anyway and don't need to read this article.

People who prefer the oat bits usually become accountants, librarians who work at the reference desk, or government employees;these people like to chow down on a big bowl brimming with oat bits before a tough day of protesting suggestive lyrics in rock music. People who like oat bits have more time to spend writing letters to the editor than any other type.

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 04:54 PM
Why don't women need a drivers license?.... Because there's no road between the kitchen and bed room.

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 04:10 PM
Charlie was visiting an old friend and his wife for dinner. When the time came to leave, his car wouldn't start, and it was too late to call the local service station.

The husband urged Charlie to stay over. There was no spare bed in the house; there wasn't even a sofa. So Charlie would have to sleep with the husband and wife.

No sooner had the husband fallen asleep when the wife tapped Charlie on the shoulder and motioned for him to come over to her. "I couldn't do that," he wispered. "Your husband is my best friend!"

"Listen, sugar," she whispered back, "there ain't nothing in the whole wide world could wake him up now."

"I can't believe that," Charlie said. "Certainly if I get on top of you and screw you, he'll wake up, won't he?"

"Sugar, he certainly won't. If you don't believe me, pluck a hair oout of his asshole and see if that wakes him."

Charlie did just that. He was amazed when the husband remained asleep. So he climed over to the wife's side of the bed a f*cked her.

When he finished, he climed back to his own side. It wasn't long before she tapped him on the shoulder and beconed him again.

Again he pulled a hair to determine if his old friend was asleep. This went on eight times during the night. Each time Charlie screwed the woman, he first pulled out one of the husband's asshole hairs.

The ninth time he pulled a hair, the husband awoke and muttered,"Listen, Charlie, old pal. I don't mind you f*cking my wife, but for Pete's sake, stop using my ass for a scoreboard!"

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 03:48 PM
A masked man walked into a sperm bank,pulled out a gun,and told the secretary that this was a stick up and to open the safe.

The secretary replied, "You idiot, this is a sperm bank, there's no money here!!"

The masked man insisted that if she did not open the safe he would shoot her on the spot. Reluctantly, she opened the safe and stood back. There in the open safe were two vials of sperm.

The robber pointed his gun at the two vials and ordered the secretary to drink them both or he would blow her head off.

When she had finished drinking the second vial the robber took off his mask. There stood her husband with a grin on his face!!

"See Doris", he said."that didn't kill you, did it?!"

ckitchin's photo
Sun 03/09/08 03:42 PM
1. "I was kidding about being sterile,you know."
2. "Do you always fart like that when someone shoves it in?"
3. "How come it's so BIG in there?"
4. "You've done this with a lotta guys before--right?"
5. "Next time I come over, don't bother with the underwear,...OK?"
6. (Sniff,Sniff) "Is that CAT food?"
7. (Yelling) "OK guys, it's a wrap, cut, and print it!!"
8. "You are great in bed, but your sister gives better head!"
9. "My first wife was prettier, but you can screw a lot better."
10. "Do you know what a 'douche' is?"
11. "Maybe if you did some pushups, your boobs would grow."
12. "I want you to try some of MY deoderant."
13. "I'm not into relationships. Can't we just screw,like every Tuesday night or something?"
14. "Maybe if you lost some weight, I could get it all the way in!"
15. "I never saw a girl with hairy tits before!"
16. "I've been getting these blisters lately..."
17. "You wanna do the dishes before you leave?"
18. "You should go wash that, the cabbie will think something DIED in there!"

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