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Topic:
Nice to meet you.
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Hello and welcome to Mingle2
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Topic:
Any work or tip or help
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You could try, Renting a obscenely expensive phone number, put the phone number on a big sticker on your car, that reads " hows my driving?" And then all you have to do is drive like an flippin idiot   Good answer 
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Topic:
Curtains
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A wife says to her husband "Can you close the curtains please as I don't want the neighbours to see me naked".
Husband replies "If the neighbours don't want to see you naked they'll close their own curtains !!!". |
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Topic:
Tea
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Did you hear about the Red Indian chief who drank a gallon of tea per day ?.
He was found drowned in his teepee |
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Topic:
NEWBIE HERE
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Hello and welcome to Mingle2
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Topic:
Chinese Take Away
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Ironically,many years ago I used watch an American tv series and in the end credits was a man called Ralph Wanka
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Topic:
Love is life
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Welcome to the asylum of Mingle2
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Topic:
He Rocks (Adult content)
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Deep and meaningful without being offensive
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Topic:
Parrot
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A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, 'Jesus knows you're here.'
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head and continued. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard 'Jesus is watching you.' Startled, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. 'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot. 'Yes', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he's watching you.' The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?' 'Moses,' replied the bird. 'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?' 'The kind of people who would name a Rottweiler Jesus.' |
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Topic:
Robber
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Brave asda shop assistant fights off robber with her labelling gun.
Police said there will be a price on his head |
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Topic:
Tech Support
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New employee rings IT for help:
Hi,I'm trying to log into my colleague's computer as I need information from it and I'm locked out. Have you put in the right password ?. Yes,I've been watching him all day and it's six stars. |
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Topic:
Chinese Take Away
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Topic:
Chinese Take Away
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I rang a Chinese take away the other night.
A voice answered and said "Hi,I'm Wang King the chef. No worries I said,I'll call back later |
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Topic:
Tourists
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Topic:
Only the Irish
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Old but gold
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Topic:
women rate me
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How about wanted by FBI and CIA ?
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Topic:
Magic trick
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Nice one
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Topic:
Whisky
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Two Chinese men break into a distilliery.
One says "Is this Whisky ?" His accomplice says "Yes,but not as whisky as wobbing a bank". |
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Topic:
SuperSex
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A wife walks into the bedroom,opens her dressing gown to her husband revealing she isn't wearing anything underneath and says to him "SuperSex".
Husband replies "I'll have soup". |
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