Topic: Do we stop looking?
no photo
Thu 04/10/08 02:27 PM
Never got any approval or attention from my mom when was a kid cause I was male(she hates all men). Will/how do I stop looking for it in women?

Jill298's photo
Thu 04/10/08 02:28 PM
be more approving of yourself

azrae1l's photo
Thu 04/10/08 02:29 PM
date men?

tanyaann's photo
Thu 04/10/08 02:32 PM
I have the same problem, it has taken therapy and a lot of soul searching to try to curb it. It will never go away completely. It helps to be by yourself for a while and to find yourself. Good luck to you.

dejavieu's photo
Thu 04/10/08 02:33 PM
Edited by dejavieu on Thu 04/10/08 02:36 PM
It's never too late to learn...men are amazing, virile and exotic creatures! Learn it...live it...love it! If I didn't love being a woman so much, I'd envy you! :heart: flowerforyou :heart:

And date someone who knows it!

no photo
Thu 04/10/08 04:34 PM
thanks

AngelLight's photo
Tue 04/15/08 08:55 AM

be more approving of yourself


Jill is right. Yet the process of learning to do this can be difficult because what you are describing is "primal wounding" which often occurs in early childhood as a result of very difficult life experiences.

You may need someone professionally qualified to help you heal.

wickedlluccy's photo
Tue 04/15/08 09:09 AM
Edited by wickedlluccy on Tue 04/15/08 09:10 AM

Never got any approval or attention from my mom when was a kid cause I was male(she hates all men). Will/how do I stop looking for it in women?



....my mom did not/does not relate well to women (or female children)...I overcompensate for it, by loving my daughter fervently...and still do and always will...I feel blessed to have women in my life, even though I relate best to men and boys.....you just make that choice !!!and follow through with actions to back it up.....

:heart:~wicked~:heart:

unsure's photo
Tue 04/15/08 11:44 AM
I think you have to look deep inside and accept yourself. Sure sometimes parents make bad choices and do the wrong thing when we are children...but thats done and over with. Look at all of your good qualities and accept who you are! I am sure that you are a great person and I am sure that you are a great father. That right there should make you realize that you deserve a great life!!
You have to love yourself before anyone else will love you SO thats what you need to work on!! Good luck flowerforyou

no photo
Wed 04/16/08 06:53 PM

I think you have to look deep inside and accept yourself. Sure sometimes parents make bad choices and do the wrong thing when we are children...but thats done and over with. Look at all of your good qualities and accept who you are! I am sure that you are a great person and I am sure that you are a great father. That right there should make you realize that you deserve a great life!!
You have to love yourself before anyone else will love you SO thats what you need to work on!! Good luck flowerforyou


I never said anything about not liking or accepting myself, I f*ckin rock, was just wondering if I can find different type of woman than I am or have a better realitionship than what i was taught by my parents

Jill298's photo
Wed 04/16/08 06:55 PM


I think you have to look deep inside and accept yourself. Sure sometimes parents make bad choices and do the wrong thing when we are children...but thats done and over with. Look at all of your good qualities and accept who you are! I am sure that you are a great person and I am sure that you are a great father. That right there should make you realize that you deserve a great life!!
You have to love yourself before anyone else will love you SO thats what you need to work on!! Good luck flowerforyou


I never said anything about not liking or accepting myself, I f*ckin rock, was just wondering if I can find different type of woman than I am or have a better realitionship than what i was taught by my parents
yes you can... just make sure you are not subconsciencly picking women with the same traits...

franshade's photo
Wed 04/16/08 06:55 PM


I think you have to look deep inside and accept yourself. Sure sometimes parents make bad choices and do the wrong thing when we are children...but thats done and over with. Look at all of your good qualities and accept who you are! I am sure that you are a great person and I am sure that you are a great father. That right there should make you realize that you deserve a great life!!
You have to love yourself before anyone else will love you SO thats what you need to work on!! Good luck flowerforyou


I never said anything about not liking or accepting myself, I f*ckin rock, was just wondering if I can find different type of woman than I am or have a better realitionship than what i was taught by my parents


the possibilities are endless, it is entirely up to you which direction you follow.

downhomechik's photo
Thu 04/17/08 06:58 AM
what I want and what I think I need r 2 very different things.
what I look for and what I get r 2 very different things.

patience is the key here.

your parents did the best they could with the tools they had to work with. they didn't know any better. they shoulda but maybe didn't. forgive them. forgive yourself for looking for that validation


1956CLEO's photo
Thu 04/17/08 08:57 AM

It's never too late to learn...men are amazing, virile and exotic creatures! Learn it...live it...love it! If I didn't love being a woman so much, I'd envy you! :heart: flowerforyou :heart:

And date someone who knows it!


Beautifully said! We all want other's approval, but you must first and foremost approve of yourself. :heart: You must be happy with you!:heart: