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Topic: WIDOWS AND WIDOWERS
oldsage's photo
Wed 06/25/08 02:10 PM
Deanna, hope you make some friends here.
We are a pretty decent bunch, enjoy good conversation & helping eachother cope.
11 yrs for me & I agree on staying single.

GREATGUY's photo
Wed 06/25/08 05:25 PM
You will do just fine. Its humbling here. You think you are the only one with troubles and you find everyone has something going on, more some days than others.

There is something good about that, it means when people respond to you, they have been there and done that so they have nothing to prove, only help and understanding to offer.

For me, I would like to find someone. Heck the longer you look at yourself in a mirror the better looking you think you are. Besides,its not good talking to youself all the time.

no photo
Wed 06/25/08 09:34 PM
Thanks Auburn for inviting me here. It's obvious that our lives are different from others who have not gone through what we have. For those who do not have belief in the spirit and soul it must be terrifying. For us who know there is a beyond, we still go through the nightmares, but also get to experience that strange peace "in the still".

One thing I do understand is the pity that many go through, or even put themselves through. I think that (for me any way) it's important to start learning how to get over the guilt that it is not your fault. The if only's can drive you crazy.

Another thing that people say is "put it behind". I don't want to put it behind. I don't want to start a new. I want to continue (good or bad). Continue in this world and the next.

God bless all of you you are trying to deal with this.

with love,

michael

Rapunzel's photo
Wed 06/25/08 10:03 PM
flowerforyou Greetings Auburn Girl flowerforyou

& Everyone else...flowerforyou


:smile: i just noticed you online here drinker dear Brother Michael :smile:


flowerforyou & i thought i'd stop by & say hello flowerforyou


:cry: i was unaware that you are also widowed ...:cry:


:heart: Love to you & to your dear, sweet Bonny Miss :heart:


:smile: i agree with your idea of <not putting it behind>, :smile:

drinker but starting fresh & brand new drinker


flowerforyou God Bless You flowerforyou





auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/26/08 04:43 AM
Good Morning all flowerforyou


Welcome Deanna I'm so glad you found us!flowerforyou

((((Michael)))) Glad you came by! flowerforyou Love to Bonnyflowerforyou


(((((Vanessa))))))flowerforyou

carold's photo
Thu 06/26/08 05:21 AM

Thanks Auburn for inviting me here. It's obvious that our lives are different from others who have not gone through what we have. For those who do not have belief in the spirit and soul it must be terrifying. For us who know there is a beyond, we still go through the nightmares, but also get to experience that strange peace "in the still".

One thing I do understand is the pity that many go through, or even put themselves through. I think that (for me any way) it's important to start learning how to get over the guilt that it is not your fault. The if only's can drive you crazy.

Another thing that people say is "put it behind". I don't want to put it behind. I don't want to start a new. I want to continue (good or bad). Continue in this world and the next.

God bless all of you you are trying to deal with this.

with love,

michael I so agree with that what you were saying about people saying put it behind you. My husbands death was expected and it is over 3 years and when he left he was in so much pain I was ready and he is free now. But my sister was unexpected and allot younger than me. I don't have words for people that say that because they don't know. And someone else was talking about guilt. With her so much guilt because of our relationship I was always there for her if I did this or that maybe this wouldn't have happened. It has been 6 years only time helps it heal. Life I know our love ones want to see us happy so I just try for that. Smiles

Rapunzel's photo
Thu 06/26/08 07:38 AM

Good Morning all flowerforyou


Welcome Deanna I'm so glad you found us!flowerforyou

((((Michael)))) Glad you came by! flowerforyou Love to Bonnyflowerforyou


(((((Vanessa))))))flowerforyou




flowerforyou Thank you so much dear Auburn Girl, for your sweet hospitality flowerforyou



:heart: You are always so kind, generous, & such a precious blessing :heart:

auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/26/08 08:27 AM
{{{{{Vanessa}}}}} you are so kind to me! flowerforyou

no photo
Thu 06/26/08 08:48 AM
Thanks for all the heartfelt welcomes. So far I like this site alot and I do feel welcome.

auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/26/08 09:19 AM
Deanna, when was your loss if I may ask you that?

auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/26/08 09:20 AM

Hi,
Just wanted to say hello. I found and joined this site today and i really, really like it. I am a widow and have been one for 18 years. I have been single since I was 30. My children are now 21, 25, and 28. I don't date; I tried that for a little while here and there and got so tired of it that I quit completely in 2001. I'm alone and most of the time not lonely. If and when I get lonely I find something to do. As I said I like this site and I'm realy glad I found it.



OPPS, nevermind, I see it now!

I'm very sorry for your loss. flowerforyou I have been widowed 9 yrs. My husband died of cancer when he was 37 and I was 3 weeks from my 36th birthday.

auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/26/08 09:22 AM
OH CATHY?????????? WHERE ARE YOU????



I know you have a couple of significant dates the end of this month and I'm wondering how you are?!!!!! flowerforyou

im4roses's photo
Thu 06/26/08 11:48 AM
well we are heading into July.... to many dates that mattered this nest month his bd, anniversary stemm cell transplant he would have 5 years nold by transplant date.. gma bd. can I slip July and move to augest.. have to find a job... to much to do here.. just overwhelmed today sorry

auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/26/08 12:52 PM
HUGS Rose flowerforyou It's tough when so much comes so close together. We understand.

no photo
Thu 06/26/08 01:20 PM
Edited by deanna48 on Thu 06/26/08 01:25 PM
My husband died 18 years ago. I know that's a long time to stay single. It took a long time to heal. he was an alcoholic and a drug addict, and everything else that goes along with those 2 things. I didn't plan to stay single this long, but that's the way it's worked out.

Hey Rose - find a place to go to or do something you normally wouldn't do during some of those days. Go to a movie, take an unexpected day trip, etc. That helps

auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/26/08 01:41 PM
Hugs Deanna! flowerforyou

no photo
Fri 06/27/08 03:17 AM
Hi back to my friends,

You have made this thread such a warm place.

love and peace always

michael

And a special thanks to Bonny for all of her support and kindness!!!!!

auburngirl's photo
Fri 06/27/08 10:48 AM
Thank you Michael I/we have all tried to. We hoped to get our own board to break the topics up a bit so information already covered would be easier to find, but that didn't happen. Maybe one day.

I'm thrilled with the response here. Entering the dating world again for people who have lost a spouse can add quite the twist can't it? I've even thought of setting one evening a week perhaps to be here at a specific time to chat for any who could do that. We'll see



Have a GREAT Friday everyone!!!! flowerforyou

auburngirl's photo
Sat 06/28/08 06:14 AM
GOOOOOD morning to all widows and widowers!

I hope you all have a GREAT day! flowers

carold's photo
Sat 06/28/08 06:27 AM

GOOOOOD morning to all widows and widowers!

I hope you all have a GREAT day! flowers
Back at yah Smiles

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