in short

I have been dating this girl for 4 1/2 yrs but things are not working out and I think we are going to end it soon. I dont want it to after 4 1/2 yrs but no matter what I do it is not good enough. She is about to finish teachers college and I saw her through University and now this. But I'm to the point where I want something more and she wants something but the communication is just not there. I do everything for our relationship, clean, take care of our cats, the car, work full time and now looking for a second job to pay all our bills. I tell her all the time how much I love here and that she is sexy all the time, even first thing in the morning or when she is sick. I have read so many blogs and I have visited so many website to learn more about how to communicate and make relationships work better. I’m out of idea’s and need some advice, I really want to save my relationship but to tell you all the truth I think it is too late.

Seems to me you are the one that is trying too hard

From reading what you've written, it sounds as if it's a one-sided relationship, or at least no where near "balanced" and that you are the one putting forth all the effort. "No matter what I do, it's not good enough", those were your words. Do you want to spend a life time feeling that way, or even another year? If she won't communicate with you about what the problems are in your relationship, then IMO, it's doomed anyway.

i agree; if you think it's too late, then it is too late.

and joining a dating site isn't going to help it any.

Sh!t. Even I'm feeling used in this thread.

mmmm, i'm hungry. what are you ^^^ eating in that photo?

Okay...let's assume that I do not know jack about the intricacies of your relationship.
That keeps me from coming across wrong.

The teacher's school (or any life-changing issue that consumes years of attention and growth) has got to have changed your sweetheart. I know that you've talked it out with her, probably during each semester, and helped her to burn the midnight oil a dozen times so that she could make her goals become a reality.
But...even if you two now embark upon a new type of living/loving agreement, the real issue is devotion/commitment for life. That is what seems to be missing in non-married long term relations, and it is the comfort of "forever until death do us part" that keeps these life changes from being an end to living-together relationships.

Example: My lawyer became a lawyer by going to law school, of course...but he could not afford law school until his wife first graduated from veterinary school and became successful. Her success was an offshoot of the marriage devotion, and then that grew into success for both of them, by the shared goals for life.
This is so similar to your situation that I just had to bring up the parallel...and the essential difference between their story and yours.

If your girlfriend were to commit to helping get you to reach a similar goal, as you have done with her, then would the commitment (at this time in her life/physiological development) logically require lifelong commitment?

have you tried professional joint counseling?
if she's willing try it.

I agree back up let her come to you all her needs are being met your a good guy. Looks like you need attetion. You try so hard for the communication and she is just into herself. When she finally hears you've got nothing to say she'll start talking. :)

sounds like u r being used, Turn around and RUN.

It takes 2 to communicate.

Am I the only one who read your profile? I noticed a VERY interesting statement.

That you've put your life on hold "3 times for 3 different women" .. and now 10 years of your life has gone by. hmmmm

I say this with all kindness but you know the phrase? .. "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over getting the same results."

I know the feeling and have done that in the past but you have to LEARN from the mistake and CHANGE the way you approach relationships then.

Sounds like this is a one-way street repeat. In the future try a 2-way instead

Just sayin