Topic: emotional abuse
no photo
Mon 02/08/10 12:17 PM

Abuse is for the weak souled pantywaists who are willing to put up with someone mistreating them physically, verbally or mentally. It is their CHOICE to put up with that crap.


So then you've never heard of child abuse? slaphead People become abused for MANY reasons, far too many to list in a thread such as this. Choice has nothing to do with it!

....that is a choice that the abusee makes consciously.

Really? You might want to pick up a psychology book before you paint with such a broad brush. Again, choice has nothing to do with it!

Before anyone jumps my @ss for my perspective, consider the possibility that I may very well have a s**t load more first hand experience than you would ever know.

In ego maybe but not in abuse. I can appreciate your "perspective" but you don't have a clue as to what real abuse is all about. Oh and by the way, just because you may be "exposed" to abused people doesn't mean jack about your understanding of their condition.



ambuh_massacre's photo
Mon 02/08/10 12:22 PM


another thread made me think of this and curious of the answers....

is it emotional abuse if you don't let it effect you?

sorry it's late and my brain is on over load lol


Yes the same way a push is still physical abuse even if you don't get hurt.


Agreed.

janeh's photo
Mon 02/08/10 03:27 PM
I grew up in an achololic home and I can say from first hand experience that abuse of ANY kind will effect you. You can try to just ignore it, but if it comes at you everyday and from someone who claims to love you, you do get effected from it. And as to why so many go back, because it's all they know. You see for some people having low self-estem is considered a step up.

silly's photo
Mon 02/08/10 03:58 PM
yes, I think it still is abuse even if u don't let it bother u.Just think of the type of person its coming from.No one should ever abuse another person,whether it be words or hitting.

irisheyes79's photo
Mon 02/08/10 04:01 PM
it is even if not physical it hurts just as much or in my case much more than nything anyone could ever do to me

Anton_k's photo
Mon 02/08/10 04:50 PM

another thread made me think of this and curious of the answers....

is it emotional abuse if you don't let it effect you?

sorry it's late and my brain is on over load lol


i believe it does affect you in ways you might not be awaye of ..you might dwell on what was said ..letting it hinder your future judgments , self doubting for example, it could take time to manifest before it affects you in a noticeable way.flowerforyou

krupa's photo
Mon 02/08/10 05:28 PM


Abuse is for the weak souled pantywaists who are willing to put up with someone mistreating them physically, verbally or mentally. It is their CHOICE to put up with that crap.


So then you've never heard of child abuse? slaphead People become abused for MANY reasons, far too many to list in a thread such as this. Choice has nothing to do with it!

....that is a choice that the abusee makes consciously.

Really? You might want to pick up a psychology book before you paint with such a broad brush. Again, choice has nothing to do with it!

Before anyone jumps my @ss for my perspective, consider the possibility that I may very well have a s**t load more first hand experience than you would ever know.

In ego maybe but not in abuse. I can appreciate your "perspective" but you don't have a clue as to what real abuse is all about. Oh and by the way, just because you may be "exposed" to abused people doesn't mean jack about your understanding of their condition.





Speaking of not knowing jack.........carry on with your analysis of my real world experience.


Quietman_2009's photo
Mon 02/08/10 05:40 PM
In ego maybe but not in abuse. I can appreciate your "perspective" but you don't have a clue as to what real abuse is all about. Oh and by the way, just because you may be "exposed" to abused people doesn't mean jack about your understanding of their condition.


I expose myself to abused people

but they keep calling the cops

krupa's photo
Mon 02/08/10 06:43 PM

In ego maybe but not in abuse. I can appreciate your "perspective" but you don't have a clue as to what real abuse is all about. Oh and by the way, just because you may be "exposed" to abused people doesn't mean jack about your understanding of their condition.


I expose myself to abused people

but they keep calling the cops



Hehehehehe. That's pretty good.

wannacuddlewthme's photo
Mon 02/08/10 06:49 PM
Any kind of abuse to anyone for so long.They will find a way to get back some how some way.Forgive but never forget.Just hope they aren't thinking about the abuser on their bad dayflowerforyou

no photo
Tue 02/09/10 01:51 PM

carry on with your analysis of my real world experience.


Experience is just a buzz word that just means that you’ve "observed" something. It does NOT mean in any way that you understand what you’ve observed, and it certainly doesn’t mean that you know how to treat it, or help those that have lived with abuse. It has also been noted that you were eerily silent trying to explain how children somehow have a 'choice' with their abusers. Have a nice day.

krupa's photo
Tue 02/09/10 04:26 PM


carry on with your analysis of my real world experience.


Experience is just a buzz word that just means that you’ve "observed" something. It does NOT mean in any way that you understand what you’ve observed, and it certainly doesn’t mean that you know how to treat it, or help those that have lived with abuse. It has also been noted that you were eerily silent trying to explain how children somehow have a 'choice' with their abusers. Have a nice day.


I was there when a sister I used to have got bludgeoned into a vegetative state (she didn't make it). My father grabbed me and my bro and we left that psycho b*tch that night.

When I choose not to discuss something of a deeply personal nature, it is because it is none of your fukn business.

TxsSun's photo
Tue 02/09/10 04:27 PM

I'm talking about the inside. If you are strong enough to not let it mess with you....then is that abuse?


It may at the time seem to not bother you, but eventually it will.

no photo
Tue 02/09/10 10:07 PM

it is because it is none of your fukn business.


Don't flatter yourself, I couldn't care less about your business. I only care about making sure that your warped idea about what abuse is doesn't get spread. Choice has nothing to do with abuse, and it never will be.

AndyBgood's photo
Tue 02/09/10 10:23 PM

another thread made me think of this and curious of the answers....

is it emotional abuse if you don't let it effect you?

sorry it's late and my brain is on over load lol

Disclaimer....This topic is not based on personal experience. It is a topic for discussion only

I just wanted to add this laugh


Abuse is abuse, period. Short answer...

The emotional abuser deserves a spanking. A hard one.

huh


waving Hi Rose!waving

msharmony's photo
Tue 02/09/10 10:28 PM

another thread made me think of this and curious of the answers....

is it emotional abuse if you don't let it effect you?

sorry it's late and my brain is on over load lol

Disclaimer....This topic is not based on personal experience. It is a topic for discussion only

I just wanted to add this laugh




Great question yellow, as usual. I think its one of those endless debates about who gets to label it abuse. Obviously if the receiver didnt feel negatively affected it isnt abuse,, although others may claim it is. Likewise, if the receiver feels abused, all that is necessary is her revealing this feeling and any CONTINUING of that behavior is certainly abusive. A great example is spanking,,,some consider it abuse,, many children and adults who grew up with it,, do not.

krupa's photo
Wed 02/10/10 05:29 AM
Edited by krupa on Wed 02/10/10 05:41 AM
Flatter myself?

Right


I donno......sometimes a merciless beating is the right answer

AndyBgood's photo
Wed 02/10/10 11:28 AM

Flatter myself?

Right


I donno......sometimes a merciless beating is the right answer


Two wrongs don't make a right...


But three left turns do!


Seriously, emotional abuse is usually a tool of cowards and punk assed thugs. Krupa... drinker I got to agree. Sometimes abusers need a taste of their own medicine but then again there is no substitute for beating the crap out of someone who really deserves it and no matter what philosophy anyone goes by (meaning those who don't believe in corporal or capital punishment) there are people out there so bad and or so stupid the only thing they respond to is pain. Humans are not as smart as they think they are and I have had to beat on dogs that would not listen to simple commands like staying off of the dinner table when we were getting ready to eat and after the second smack down the dog stays off of the table even with food on it because the dog has something to reflect on for its actions. They think and they also are self determined and self indulging like us. What makes anyone think emotional abuse is tolerable? It isn't. Having to restrain myself while people I know have to endure emotional abuse is an abuse to me as well. Violence in any way "fans out" and does ripple to others who have to interact with an abuser and the abused. That is something I noticed a lot of humans do not understand it the effects past what we see for our actions. Imagine a child having to grow up in a a house where the husband always blames the wife for his failures or a alcoholic bit*h of a mother who gets drunk and goes off on everyone verbally including her kids. Been there! (Not my own mom. She never drank). Seriously, emotional abusers need to feel a ruler off the back of their hands or something. To me it is the same thing as Passive Aggressive and that is something I hate (justifiably).

Some people just can't get along with others. They need to stay in their own corner for everyone's sake. HARUMPH!

Can I get a Hallelujah?

:banana:

Besides, Mean people suck!drinker

XenomorphEyez's photo
Wed 02/10/10 12:20 PM

I'm talking about the inside. If you are strong enough to not let it mess with you....then is that abuse?

It's still abuse and maybe the person doesn't feel it on the inside because they are used to it and accepting it so they don't see it that way. Either way, someone calling you foul names (or whatever the mental abuse is) is still going to be abuse.

no photo
Wed 02/10/10 12:33 PM

maybe the person doesn't feel it on the inside because they are used to it and accepting it so they don't see it that way.


VERY good point XenomorphEyez! A persons CONDITIONING is very much a part of abuse. That's why working on their self-esteem can be so important. Thanks for illuminating such a great point :smile: