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Topic: Being shy
Blaq112's photo
Mon 03/26/12 04:42 PM
I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?

pennyg281's photo
Mon 03/26/12 04:53 PM
I'm shy too. but you have to try and step out of your comfort zone if you wanna grow. try getting involved in a small group that side something you like. UFO to a small bible study and I try to talk to at gemstone person I don't know the days I go swimming at the pool. the more you step out if your comfort zone the easier it will be. good luck :)

mightymoe's photo
Mon 03/26/12 04:54 PM

I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?


so tell me about yourself...

krupa's photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:02 PM
I am shy too. It will take some effort to get over it but, it can be done BabyDoll.

First things first....

DIRECT EYE CONTACT WITH A SMILE. Anywhere you go...Everywhere you go. Chin UP! Head held high.

Next....Roll up a pair of socks and stuff them in the FRONT of your pants...not the back....(take my word for it) It is a confidence booster....unless you put that lump in back...then the laughter probably won't help.

Most importantly...remember that you are as good and as worthy of love and respect as anyone out there. If you can't do that...you are screwed.

You're welcome.

:)

Totage's photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:09 PM
Edited by Totage on Mon 03/26/12 05:12 PM

I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?


Don't dive right into being more social, take small steps, outside of your comfort zone. Smile more often and say "Hi" to strangers. Go out a bit more often. You don't have to hit the bar or club, but maybe the library or local bookstore, or coffee shop? Heck, even the mall or Wal Mart can do. Take walk through some local parks. Volunteer in your community. Any singles events in your area? There's all kinds of things you can do, just TRY. Step out of your shell a little bit at a time.


Oh, and when you see yourself in the mirror, look into your eyes and SMILE. In the morning, say "Good morning beautiful, as you look yourself in the eyes and smile. May sound silly, and may be awkward at first, but this works to boost confidence.

no photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:10 PM
indifferent

metalwing's photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:13 PM
Start by walking around your home naked ...

Totage's photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:14 PM

Start by walking around your home naked ...


That can actually work as well.

RainbowTrout's photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:23 PM
You have come to the right place. Mingling here or in the real world is a great idea to begin with. Little social get together with people of common interests for a common goal works for forming friendships.

krupa's photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:28 PM


I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?


Don't dive right into being more social, take small steps, outside of your comfort zone. Smile more often and say "Hi" to strangers. Go out a bit more often. You don't have to hit the bar or club, but maybe the library or local bookstore, or coffee shop? Heck, even the mall or Wal Mart can do. Take walk through some local parks. Volunteer in your community. Any singles events in your area? There's all kinds of things you can do, just TRY. Step out of your shell a little bit at a time.


Oh, and when you see yourself in the mirror, look into your eyes and SMILE. In the morning, say "Good morning beautiful, as you look yourself in the eyes and smile. May sound silly, and may be awkward at first, but this works to boost confidence.


We got opposite approaches brother.

I can talk a turtle out of it's shell to go drinkin and skinny dipping.

Not saying your approach is wrong...I just think...stick a toe in the pool or go swimming.

Swimming is more fun.

Totage's photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:38 PM



I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?


Don't dive right into being more social, take small steps, outside of your comfort zone. Smile more often and say "Hi" to strangers. Go out a bit more often. You don't have to hit the bar or club, but maybe the library or local bookstore, or coffee shop? Heck, even the mall or Wal Mart can do. Take walk through some local parks. Volunteer in your community. Any singles events in your area? There's all kinds of things you can do, just TRY. Step out of your shell a little bit at a time.


Oh, and when you see yourself in the mirror, look into your eyes and SMILE. In the morning, say "Good morning beautiful, as you look yourself in the eyes and smile. May sound silly, and may be awkward at first, but this works to boost confidence.


We got opposite approaches brother.

I can talk a turtle out of it's shell to go drinkin and skinny dipping.

Not saying your approach is wrong...I just think...stick a toe in the pool or go swimming.

Swimming is more fun.


Yes, the point is to eventually swim, but some people are more comfortable taking baby steps to get there. If you're not used to swimming, it's not always a good idea to start at the deep end.

thewaterbearer's photo
Mon 03/26/12 05:54 PM

indifferent


laugh indifferent

krupa's photo
Mon 03/26/12 06:01 PM




I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?


Don't dive right into being more social, take small steps, outside of your comfort zone. Smile more often and say "Hi" to strangers. Go out a bit more often. You don't have to hit the bar or club, but maybe the library or local bookstore, or coffee shop? Heck, even the mall or Wal Mart can do. Take walk through some local parks. Volunteer in your community. Any singles events in your area? There's all kinds of things you can do, just TRY. Step out of your shell a little bit at a time.


Oh, and when you see yourself in the mirror, look into your eyes and SMILE. In the morning, say "Good morning beautiful, as you look yourself in the eyes and smile. May sound silly, and may be awkward at first, but this works to boost confidence.


We got opposite approaches brother.

I can talk a turtle out of it's shell to go drinkin and skinny dipping.

Not saying your approach is wrong...I just think...stick a toe in the pool or go swimming.

Swimming is more fun.


Yes, the point is to eventually swim, but some people are more comfortable taking baby steps to get there. If you're not used to swimming, it's not always a good idea to start at the deep end.


You never met my older brother Buddy Lee.

Comfort got zero to do with it.

You have your brother throw you into the deep end of the YMCA swimming pool and walk out laughing...you learn to swim.

that is exactly how I learned

My line of thinking.....take a schitt or get off the pot.



Back on topic...this girl gotta learn to swim with us sharks.

It is easy...but, it has to be done. You don' stick a toe in the water.....you get wet.

Totage's photo
Mon 03/26/12 06:13 PM
I agree with your view too. I think we just have to figure out what works best for us. If diving right into the deep end works for you, go for it. If you need to take baby steps, take baby steps. You won't accomplish your goals by doing nothing, but you can do something to reach your goals.

motowndowntown's photo
Mon 03/26/12 06:21 PM
Yes, get out of your comfort zone.

Take acting or public speaking courses.

Read a lot of current stuff so you have something to talk about.

Ask people about themselves.

People love talking about themselves.

no photo
Mon 03/26/12 06:25 PM
If you lay back too far...well how will anybody know your available..smokin flowerforyou

no photo
Mon 03/26/12 08:10 PM


I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?


Don't dive right into being more social, take small steps, outside of your comfort zone. Smile more often and say "Hi" to strangers. Go out a bit more often. You don't have to hit the bar or club, but maybe the library or local bookstore, or coffee shop? Heck, even the mall or Wal Mart can do. Take walk through some local parks. Volunteer in your community. Any singles events in your area? There's all kinds of things you can do, just TRY. Step out of your shell a little bit at a time.


Oh, and when you see yourself in the mirror, look into your eyes and SMILE. In the morning, say "Good morning beautiful, as you look yourself in the eyes and smile. May sound silly, and may be awkward at first, but this works to boost confidence.


I think going to a bar and talking to strangers is actually easier than a store, the mall or library. People are there to be social. At stores and some other places you listed, they're often there for their own reasons, not necessarily being social.

Volunteering is a good idea, though!

pyxxie13's photo
Mon 03/26/12 08:13 PM
I am not shy sorry..I don't have anything to contribute. Making yourself more approachable is always key.

Totage's photo
Mon 03/26/12 08:21 PM



I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?


Don't dive right into being more social, take small steps, outside of your comfort zone. Smile more often and say "Hi" to strangers. Go out a bit more often. You don't have to hit the bar or club, but maybe the library or local bookstore, or coffee shop? Heck, even the mall or Wal Mart can do. Take walk through some local parks. Volunteer in your community. Any singles events in your area? There's all kinds of things you can do, just TRY. Step out of your shell a little bit at a time.


Oh, and when you see yourself in the mirror, look into your eyes and SMILE. In the morning, say "Good morning beautiful, as you look yourself in the eyes and smile. May sound silly, and may be awkward at first, but this works to boost confidence.


I think going to a bar and talking to strangers is actually easier than a store, the mall or library. People are there to be social. At stores and some other places you listed, they're often there for their own reasons, not necessarily being social.

Volunteering is a good idea, though!


Just some ideas that came to mind, good point though. Not everyone drinks, so I was just trying to think off the top of my head of some other places people would be.

no photo
Mon 03/26/12 08:28 PM
Edited by singmesweet on Mon 03/26/12 08:28 PM




I am a quiet laid back woman who is very shy .This causes issues being single .I am trying to change this any suggestions?


Don't dive right into being more social, take small steps, outside of your comfort zone. Smile more often and say "Hi" to strangers. Go out a bit more often. You don't have to hit the bar or club, but maybe the library or local bookstore, or coffee shop? Heck, even the mall or Wal Mart can do. Take walk through some local parks. Volunteer in your community. Any singles events in your area? There's all kinds of things you can do, just TRY. Step out of your shell a little bit at a time.


Oh, and when you see yourself in the mirror, look into your eyes and SMILE. In the morning, say "Good morning beautiful, as you look yourself in the eyes and smile. May sound silly, and may be awkward at first, but this works to boost confidence.


I think going to a bar and talking to strangers is actually easier than a store, the mall or library. People are there to be social. At stores and some other places you listed, they're often there for their own reasons, not necessarily being social.

Volunteering is a good idea, though!


Just some ideas that came to mind, good point though. Not everyone drinks, so I was just trying to think off the top of my head of some other places people would be.


I was just giving my opinion :). The other places are just harder, as you actually have to walk up to complete strangers while they're doing whatever they're doing. Bars are easy, as you're often sitting next to or near people who are easy to chat with.

Bookstores may work, though. I find coffee shops hard, because people are usually absorbed in what they're doing and not very approachable. And I never go in walmart, so that doesn't work for me :P.

Volunteering is a great way to get to know people.

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