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Topic: Divorce
pkh's photo
Thu 08/16/07 04:16 AM
Well after only 2 yrs of marriage my son and his wife are getting a divorce.She left a month ago,and came back yesterday while he was working to get the rest of her and the kids things.I had a bitter divorce,and the ones that suffered most were my kids.Now my grandkids,she's so angry she won't even pick up the phone when I call to talk to them.For the last year I've been with those kids 3 days a week.Kids are smart they no something is up.It wouldn't be so hard is she didn't move so far away and I could see them all the time.So I guess what i'm asking is to remember the kids in your prayers,in the long wrong the kids are the ones that really get hurt.I know I'll be there for them no matter what.But the parents need to realize what it does to the kids.Thanks Pam

coco56's photo
Thu 08/16/07 04:19 AM
prayers are with you pkh

Native_Grl39's photo
Thu 08/16/07 04:23 AM
I agree...just because the parents are having trouble and seperating is no reason to keep the kids away from you...They should be wanting to keep things as normal as possible for the kids right now to soften the impact of their seperation on them!!!!!!! It's a shame when a parent lets their own feelings and emotions get in the way of what's best for their children especially when it has to be just as bad if not worse for them right now!!!!!!!!!!

flowerforyou flowerforyou

Puffins1958's photo
Thu 08/16/07 04:24 AM
{{{{{Pam}}}}}

I'm so sorry honey that your not able to see them. How could your daughter-in-law be so cruel as to take them so far away from you. Your grandchildren will miss you dearly I'm sure. This must be so hard for you, I am so sorry that you have to go through this. My prayers are with you, that you get to see them soon.

flowerforyou :heart: flowerforyou :cry: flowerforyou

joshyfox's photo
Thu 08/16/07 04:31 AM
My sympathies, this can't be easy.

My brother went through a Divorce once himself before finally marrying someone who seems to be good for him for once.

nu2topcat's photo
Thu 08/16/07 04:32 AM
Its a shame that people let anger control their emotions to the point they don't think clearly. In situations like you discribe there are no winners. Everyone is a loser. After we were divorced about a year, my exes new hubby decided to move a 1000 miles away just so we wouldnt be so close.she wouldn't listen to reason. they divorced about 5 yrs later. she and the kids were stuck there and to this day she is sorry she didn't liston to reason from her family. people need to quit thinking of themselfs

ccrzyolfool's photo
Thu 08/16/07 04:42 AM
Children are the true victims of divorce . I can understand the need for distance sometimes ( new job ,need to be away from area )but to not answer the phone is cruel to both you and the kids .No matter what is happening between your son and her it is still between them not you and the kids ,and as said in earlier post the need to try and maintain some sense of normalcy in their lives should be #1 priority for the children . It is things like this that make me think that when you decide to file the papers you need to have a talk with a conselour first as far as some guidelines to follow to make this simpler for all concerned . I hope she takes her head out of the sand and starts to think about what this doing to the kids soon .

catchme_ifucan's photo
Thu 08/16/07 04:50 AM
flowerforyou ((((((((Pam))))))):heart:
:cry: :cry: :cry: I'm So Sorry!!!

Here is angels to carry you all thru this
^j^ ^j^ ^j^ :heart: ^j^

You can file for visiting..ohwell

Duchess_Athena's photo
Thu 08/16/07 05:03 AM
I am sorry you are your family are going through this. I am sure there is more to the story then just them seperating. I moved away from my husband and live no where near his family we are seperated. I don't know if she is doing like i am doing and that is living closer to my family so that they can be there for me. If she has I can understand wanting to be near your own family.

kissngrl's photo
Thu 08/16/07 05:22 AM
Divorce is very hard on everyone involved. I will remember all involved in my prayers tonight. (((hugs)))

HillFolk's photo
Thu 08/16/07 05:24 AM
Divorce can make victims of everyone involved especially the kids. My prayers are with you.

jennicunningham's photo
Thu 08/16/07 05:27 AM
Marriage is the number 1 cause for divorce. LoL

oldsage's photo
Thu 08/16/07 05:37 AM
Pam

Might try writing a letter to the daughter in law, telling her you won't take sides. Just want to be there for the grandkids & will recognize her rights as custodial parent.
Also ck on Grandparent rights. You can take her to court for your rights. That is a last resort of course.

Really sorry for the kids, ex used them against me till she pissed a judge off.

MsTeddyBear2u's photo
Thu 08/16/07 07:18 AM
Prayers for the children...
Yes divorce is really hard on the children.
Unfortunately some of the parents are so pissed off they
fail to see what it is doing to their children...

Goodluck dear... I hope things calm down, and you get to see them soon... flowerforyou

TxsGal3333's photo
Thu 08/16/07 08:32 AM
Pam, okay I have been were you are right now and yes when my son and dauthter in-law got a divorce. Well I'm not one to shut my mouth very vocal person. But there comes a time in life we must hang up our guns put our tail between our legs and coward down to another. Don't mean we like it but at times it is the best for all in the long run. You see I would rather admit I did that instead of lose my granddaughter Kaitlynn is the Sunshine in my life. I would not only give my life for her but my pride as well for it was for a very good cause.

So what did I do I packed up my pride shut down my opinion took my voice and the solution I came up with and grabbed my tail and ran to her and said we need to talk. I agreed that neither her nor my son was doing right we agreeded that we would never be best friends but I also told her anything that Kaitlynn needed to contact me and also let her know that my one wish was anyone she dated I WANTED TO MEET because if Kaitlynn was gonna be around them I wanted to at least know who they were and I would be nothing but nice to them. I explained that I wanted Kaitlynn to remain in my life as before I wanted to keep her the same way if she wanted to go out fine bring her to me it was not my sons business they were going differnt ways now. All I was concerned about was my grandbaby they both could live there lives the way they chose to.And I would not tell her how to raise Kaitlynn not as long as Kaitlynn was being taken care of. And the truth is if another man was to hurt her I would be the first one there if she called me and she knows that. I told her that what was discussed between her and I would remain. That we did not have to even mention my son but she could tell me if he was not doing right or harrassing her for I would deal with that in my own way. I went through the divorce were rhe ex followed me around and threaten me it is not a good feeling and I be damned if I would let my own son get away with that.

So now what happen I have my grandbaby any time I want her and have meet each person she has dated yeah it was a bit strange but they did finally understand were I was coming from. lmao

So in the end I do hope you also can find the solution that will work best for you as well. In the end it is worth giving up what ever we have too.bigsmile flowerforyou Because really we are only gaining never losing if we get our grandbabys by us to hold and cherish through the years:heart: bigsmile flowerforyou smooched love

nurjoyce's photo
Thu 08/16/07 08:36 AM
yes the kids are the ones that suffer if the parents "fight" each other

my ex and i get along well and my kids know it
they also know they can not "play us against each other"
because it will not work


hugs, prayers, thoughts to you and your family especially
the grandkids

pkh's photo
Thu 08/16/07 08:53 AM
Thanks to all of you for your thoughts and prayers.I know just what you saying Txsgal,I would do the same as you. My daughter-in-law knows what they mean to me.And I've always told her no matter what happened with her and my son, I would support her and love her just as I always did.I just hope she's taking some time to clear her head. There's alot more to the story,but believe me I have made calls and did everything possible,but sad to say it's almost like something has to happen before they'll get involved.And grandparents really don't have to many rights.My grandson will be 1 on the 23rd and right now I can hardly even look at his picture without crying.Thanks again for your thoughts and prayers.

TxsGal3333's photo
Thu 08/16/07 08:57 AM
Pam the grandparents laws that are in effect today check with your state you might be surprised yes in the end if it would have came to that you could bet your sweet azzz I would have taken that route for in Texas Grandparents Rights are up there with the parents rights.bigsmile flowerforyou

cajunwhitetiger's photo
Thu 08/16/07 09:05 AM
i was about to ask in ur state do u have grandparents right but txgal beat me to it..
i know how the kids feel coming from a broken him. and i know how the parents feel as well. i been thru a divorce my self.
well i only know partly what they feel. no knows anyones pain but the person with the pain

dont give up. the problem will work out. it might take a while

no photo
Thu 08/16/07 09:05 AM
My ex and I swore our divorce would never drag the kids into it, but there is NO way thats not gonna happen, u just have to minimize the hurt they go through!!!

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