Previous 1
Topic: What to say when he comes on too strong?
no photo
Sun 06/23/13 09:30 PM
I would like to get both the male and female perspective on this.

We all know guys generally like to cut to the chase. So it's understandable when it happens, but what do you say when you like him and you don't want to totally shut him down, you just want him to ease up a little?

noway

soufiehere's photo
Sun 06/23/13 09:41 PM

Nice topic, I know exactly what you mean :-)
It is sort of like that guy who hangs in forever,
with indifference from you, and one day you
find that a wonderful/promising thing, eh?

You might heavily admire someone who actually
'cut right to the chase' while at the same time
being somewhat annoyed that he has not taken
the time to get to know you.

Hmmm...what to say.
I will wing this hahahaha

I might write down my phone number, hand it to
him, and say "Maybe on our 2nd date, we could
get to know each other a little better" and
walk away.


no photo
Sun 06/23/13 09:59 PM
Edited by CremeBrulee on Sun 06/23/13 10:00 PM
Uuuuuuummmm,
Well,
Maybe bang his head with a frying pan then nurse him back to good health????

no photo
Sun 06/23/13 10:24 PM
Nursing part doesn't sound that bad

germanchoclate1981's photo
Sun 06/23/13 10:35 PM
how about not sending the guy mixed signals and blaming him for getting the wires crossed. body language, place, time, alcohol, hair touching, perfume... all signals. the real question is why not say and portray what you want from us. we need women and a good 60-75% is decided based on the woman, even if she is submissive. clinical studies on pheromones have proven this. say what you mean, and do what you say. it makes everybody's life easier.

no photo
Sun 06/23/13 10:41 PM
Try this "ease up a little" and watch his reaction, but not only his first reaction but the one that follows when his ego is done with him. If he comes back cold, this will tell you one thing. If he comes back sweet and considerate of your needs, rush to Vegas and marry him cause you have found a one in a million type of guy.

Keep this in mind but in a good way. You are the teacher and he is the student. Once in a while the man is the teacher of love but most of the time it is the woman who teaches the man how to love.

You have to figure out what is behind his compulsive behavior. Is he selfish or is he truly your servant. A man who is a servant BTW is not a whimp. He just cherishes you. Sometimes though a woman is not ready to be cherished so the timing is off.

I'm only one guy though and my thoughts may only be from where I stand.

teadipper's photo
Sun 06/23/13 10:55 PM
I have literally said "Hey can you ease up on the throttle a little"?

no photo
Sun 06/23/13 11:02 PM

I have literally said "Hey can you ease up on the throttle a little"?


Yep, I've seen it be an issue for women, but most men (don't know maybe most) have a hard time with speed or lack of it. For me I don't even go there unless they throw the door open. That probably says how bad I would be at the task of timing.

ridewytepony's photo
Sun 06/23/13 11:32 PM
Tell him just that....we're lacking info here, help us help you
Is this like in the futre thing or its going on now repeatedly or if your talking guys at parties/bars
that intrest you then tell then no and just watch him walk right up to the next group of girls and do
the same because if these are the scenarios your talking about and he's that aggressive then he's
just a man on a mission playing the number game and he's the house and the house allways wins in the end. So you can allways change your mind if you say not interested and he's not mackn' on all
the rest.
as far as hangn' out going to the beach and you want him for a boyfriend then thats one thing
but if he takes you around his friend's family,stuff like that then good chance he likes you

thats the question that should matter is, if he likes you or are you going to get f....d & chucked
most young guys will not know themselves in most chases if lts like or just hormones
some girls will definitely be gf matirial and some definitely not but all the one's in the middle,, the guy
Wont have a clue until he orgasms, and you look like you would fall in the middle category.
so you have three chooses, give it up, tell him to have some respect get him off the sex subject
and play it out. take note to the places you go..and if he calls you 10:00 pm drunk with friends then that dosent countfor a positive, and third "phone sex" or cam, and have him finish then right after you say plans have change and I can see you now..and dont be surprised if he cant ..bin there way to many times.

no photo
Mon 06/24/13 02:15 AM

I would like to get both the male and female perspective on this.

We all know guys generally like to cut to the chase. So it's understandable when it happens, but what do you say when you like him and you don't want to totally shut him down, you just want him to ease up a little?

noway


honestly I usually block them or tell them the best way to get to know me is in the threads (here) if it's someone from here

whether it;s here or in real life, that behavior is usually a dealbreaker when someone presses for sex when it is fairly obvious that I do not want to move that quickly it leaves the impression that he is self centered, not very perceptive, uncaring and potentially abusive

so I'd recommend honesty. put them at arm's length and tell them why

no photo
Mon 06/24/13 02:26 AM

I would like to get both the male and female perspective on this.

We all know guys generally like to cut to the chase. So it's understandable when it happens, but what do you say when you like him and you don't want to totally shut him down, you just want him to ease up a little?

noway



When it is understandable,there would be solution.
From male perspective, if we find reason to ease up the chase,a simple conversation may work ..a humble request with smiling face may bind the person.
from female perspective..
Its always not promoting,communication may cause different issues,best thing is to ignore it at maximum and then decide the course of action.

1Cynderella's photo
Mon 06/24/13 08:45 AM
Edited by 1Cynderella on Mon 06/24/13 08:46 AM
I would simply tell him that I move a bit slower than others and if he wants to get to know me and give me the chance to know him, then he's going to have to be patient. The fastest way to push me away is to try to force something on me that I'm not ready for. flowerforyou

If he's not okay with that, then he probably wants someone else. I only know how to be me...so go fish. ohwell

oldhippie1952's photo
Mon 06/24/13 09:00 AM
Simply tell him you like him but not so fast, in a tactful manner of course.

no photo
Mon 06/24/13 09:48 AM

The guy has realized he can keep the game under control, leave it out, try to get more confidence in yourself, you're a beautiful girl and the world is full of men to subdue

no photo
Mon 06/24/13 09:51 AM
My affection is always unwanted and unappreciated
lol
So i have decided to never make advances or unwanted "passes"
At ladies
I flirt and tease but i am often misunderstood for that as well

Best of luck to you all !

biggrin


msharmony's photo
Mon 06/24/13 10:27 AM
slow down tiger,,,,

or how about

oh no, I Think I just got my period,, is there someplace I can clean up,,,?....lol




no photo
Mon 06/24/13 10:31 AM

slow down tiger,,,,

or how about

oh no, I Think I just got my period,, is there someplace I can clean up,,,?....lol






HAHAHAHAHAHA ..
That will do it for sure !
rofl


no photo
Mon 06/24/13 10:32 AM

I would like to get both the male and female perspective on this.

We all know guys generally like to cut to the chase. So it's understandable when it happens, but what do you say when you like him and you don't want to totally shut him down, you just want him to ease up a little?

noway


When subtle hints don't work, that tells me a lot about a guy...If he can't pick up on my body language or read between the lines during our conversations, he's probably not the guy for me anyway...Keeping that in mind, I would just spell it out nicely and with honesty and let the chips fall where they may... Welcome CC!... Luck, love, and happiness!flowerforyou

msharmony's photo
Mon 06/24/13 10:32 AM
:tongue:

dobermangal's photo
Mon 06/24/13 02:14 PM
I have a stalker on Facebook...may have to block him.

Previous 1