Yes. I have no judgment about it. No need to conclude that something is right or wrong. And certainly no need to tell others what to do with their bodies.

People are so locked up in judgment of themselves it is a wonder any of us can function at all.

If two consenting adult choose to have sex they are free to do so. I don't do anything that doesn't feel honouring of me and the one I am with so my personal choice is to not sleep around. But I certainly have sex when I am in a relationship and have no plans to marry again. I am not anti-marriage...and one day I may marry again but I don't require it to be fulfilled in my relationship with my special someone.

SEX is GREAT !
lol

Interesting thread of thought here.

Yes I can see how guilt and shame are so much more honouring of yourself. And how suppressing who you are is so much more honouring of another.

Dear Child...how wonderful it is that you are born. Welcome to this beautiful loving God creation called life.

Now I know that you are a creative expansive being. An infinite being that contains within you the seed ... The source... Of ALL creation. And I know that you are here to evolve, expand and grow. And i thank you for your willingness to do so because without you on this leading edge of evolution and discovery there could be no expansion.

But here's the deal. Once you make a choice you are never, ever allowed to change your mind. So to help you along your way....When those pesky urges come up ... . those silly knowings in your body that tell you it is time to grow, evolve and expand....And believe me, they will come up a lot because that infinite part of you know it needs to evolve....but don' worry i have a plan...

I have seen others use it to stop those knowings and i have been pretty successful at using it myself ..so here is my greatest gift to you dear child of mine...

there is this effective potion, you just need swallow it. I brewed it myself but most people have a similar recipe and I am told it originally came from God so we can't change the flavour of it. Because I love you though, I have made it taste the best that I could. It is super effective though and has a cumulative effect in the body so you will need less and less of it to produce the same effects over time.

what's that honey? What's it made of? Well I don't know think it is very appropriate that you ask those kinds of questions but if you must know it is mostly fear with health doses of blame, shame, regret and guilt.

Yes honey, I know it tastes bad but we all have to take it. No, no...I know it doesn't feel good but ....yes, I know you are a creative, expansive, joyful being but...here take a sip...and another...

Ahh sweet child. I love you so much. Now go into the world and be happy and know that you can be and do anything....well except change your mind of course....and except choosing again when circumstances change...other than that...have fun out there. But not too much fun because that would be bad too. In fact, you should probably take a swig or two of the potion daily just to make sure...

Ok...I love you. Be happy.

Sex is like everything else your going to experience. I'm not saying hookup at random every chance you get but there are certain things that some people are better at than others. Relationships need a healthy sexual consistency, and like everything else theres always work to keep it fresh and intense.

It's all up to you, this thing that is your life. Only you know if you feel truly ready. If you like him enough, why not? Unless your bound by religion and it's rules.

It's only when we stray from our own moral standards that we see a thing as wrong, so this answer is too relative for a singular answer.

Personally, it's wrong FOR ME to engage in sexual relations with someone I don't care deeply for. But that is my standard, because I feel anything less deminishes the value and anything more might eliminate the possibility altogether.

i personally conduct myself in a way that is honouring of me And the one I am with ...For me, I only have sex inside of a nurturing, monogamous relationship. Not because I think it is wrong not to but because that is what feels honouring of me.

But I won't decide what is right or wrong for someone else. It is a personal moral compass and choosing to honour yourself does not mean choosing to dishonour another.

Obviously, I was never considering having sex parties at the house or having multiple partners to the detriment of the care that I am giving. But it does seem that to deny a part of who I am, means also to deny some part of me too my wife. She can not be there to share with me and as much as I fight against it, there are times I resent her for it. I recognize that and try to keep it under control. But it does happen.

{{{ I agree with twatstrat }}

until you've walked a mile in one's shoes!

my friends dad had a head injury when he was a teen, and was on strong medication

for many years, leaving him impotent at an early age with no sexual desires.

his mother was very acractive and admitted not have a sex life for 10 years and eventually took

on a boyfriend that did move inn, in the end. As her husband's health deteriorated rapidly in
his late 40s.
she honored " til Death shall we part", after years of frustuation and unfulfillment, she looked after herself.
she's entitled to a full life as well!

her husbands passed, but she has been with the boyfriend for almost 20 years.

were only human and we're subject to change!

people change, the times change, situations change

{{{♥ his name's odd Rod ~ not dead rod ♥ }}} no pun intented to the story~ or was there

Rod is fine. I have seen and heard these kinds of stories. I have also seen the other side of people looking from the outside in and making their judgement. I know for a few years I had no desire at all. I was busy with recovery and rehabilitation. But there comes a time, when there is no recognition from her of what has been and no chance of rekindling something that was "never there" because she can not recall it and does not have the desire nor capacity to indulge in intimacy in the future ...

Is it a falling out of love thing? Am I just bound by the duty and honor thing? Some have suggested that divorce is the proper way to go, still have a hand in her care, but leaving me able to do what I will with my life. That seems harsh.

Some of you are starting to disgust me. But I ask myself why am I surprised.

Oh....sorry
...Wrong Thread

For me, it is morally wrong. I would have to be in a "committed" relationship, engaged/married. Many people do not have morals, so anything goes. It is a Choice that we make for our own personal lives.

I am still kinda new here. I don't know the ways of Mingle or the people that are here yet. I expected a cross section like what I see outside of the computer. I am not disappointed. I expected to find some that would be of the same mind as you lilredhollyhood and I expected to find others that would be all the way on the other side.

I don't really have any arguments yet that are stronger than the one that have been in my head already.

The only thing I can suggest is to think if it were your Mom and Dad or brother/sister and their spouse. The physical cost of taking care of someone over a long period of time in tremendous. And sometimes the care taker does not make it out either and in fact may go first. Do you just shrug your shoulders and say well that is the way it should be.

I love it actually...that whole judge not lest he be judged kinda vibe going on in here. I should have brought popcorn. Very 2013!

I don't actually see anyone really condoning rampant sex with anything moving ... although if that is your thing ... fly at it.

Most people are talking about a relationship with someone ... not necessarily marriage and not necessarily leading to marriage but a relationship that can be every bit as committed.

Some days I just look around and let the circus music play in my head...life's greatest hits!




Rod, you need to do what is right for you ... not for anyone else. I sent you an email this morning ... not sure if you got it.

This sums up my feelings exactly.

I cannot tell a lie.
I fck on the first date.

I did not see an email. I will look again and send you one if that is ok.

Of course it is okay!

I sent it again in response to your email. Let me know if you didn't get that one either.