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| Topic: How to handle a narcissist spouse? | |
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Hey People,
I love the posts U folks bring-up & the reply that follows. I'm a 34 year old married man, have a Son who is 10 months old. I look good, very homely, Family is everything to me. When I step-out of home, there are several people at workplace who just wants to catch Ur attention, talk to U & be around with U. But, when I'm at home, My spouse is very nagging. She definitely has narcissist traits. She doesn't understand when I attempt to make her understand of her nagging behavior. It really hurts, honestly. All I do is... Home >Work >Home. What advise do U have for me? Kumaara |
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you sound like a hero
it would be interesting to see what she say's about you two side to every story right |
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Check your own ego. Women know when men purposely try to create jealousy.
What do you think she would think about you being on a dating site? |
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intuitive response joe
there really isn't enough information about the wife to support what makes her 'narcissistic',, and not enough info about what makes her 'nagging' either,,,,lol is she constantly in the mirror, constantly asking for gifts or money for herself? does she call for you every five minutes? ,,,etc,,, people who only have to see us in work have the luxury of believing what we choose to show them in a professional environment,, how they treat us is really irrelevant to our home life,,,imho |
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Edited by
mrld_ii
on
Sat 11/08/14 09:06 AM
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Check your own ego. Women know when men purposely try to create jealousy. What do you think she would think about you being on a dating site? Not to mention the fact that somewhere between joining last year (while "married and looking for a woman to date") and making this, his first post (while "married and looking for a woman to date"), he forgot the fact that according to his profile, he has no children AND "does not want" any. Charmed, I'm sure. Indeed, OP...how DOES your wife handle being married to a "narcissist spouse"? |
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is the wife a narcissist or are you just a complainer ? ?
really there are 2 sides to each and every story i do wish you the best wishes on your journey but really the out look depends on the way you look at things as well see if there is a reason for her complaints ? and be happy she is bringing them up , she could just bottle them and you could have a bomb go off one day (not meaning a bomb in gen just meaning she could go all out crazy etc etc etc) maybe she knows about the things you have been doing and that is why she is complaining with out pointing out the facts <shrug> but yeah this whole thing just seams a little fishy but going off what Mrld_ii just said you might want to have yourself and your other self's checked out : ) |
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intuitive response joe not really, it was the 'home-work-home' bit in the post that I found laughable, like he deserves some sort of medal, there's millions of men who do that, and women come to think of it |
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Edited by
Conrad_73
on
Sat 11/08/14 09:19 AM
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: Oh Lord it's hard to be humble when you're perfect in every way. I can't wait to look in the mirror cause ...
Mac Davis http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYKWch_MNY0  
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Apart from all of that, women are rarely narcissists .. Men are ..
Like men are rarely borderliners .. women are |
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Mingle, Mingle on the monitor who has most self-perception illusions of them all? LOL
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: Oh Lord it's hard to be humble when you're perfect in every way. I can't wait to look in the mirror cause ... Mac Davis http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYKWch_MNY0 I love  this song. Thanks for posting the link.
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Mingle, Mingle on the monitor who has most self-perception illusions of them all? LOL I am a bit surprised nobody noticed them was used instead of us. Hoped to be corrected, but... Perhaps it is wiser to keep those expectations on more realistic level, not too high one. After all http://youtu.be/s1ysoohV_zA 
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Hey People, I love the posts U folks bring-up & the reply that follows. I'm a 34 year old married man, have a Son who is 10 months old. I look good, very homely, Family is everything to me. When I step-out of home, there are several people at workplace who just wants to catch Ur attention, talk to U & be around with U. But, when I'm at home, My spouse is very nagging. She definitely has narcissist traits. She doesn't understand when I attempt to make her understand of her nagging behavior. It really hurts, honestly. All I do is... Home >Work >Home. What advise do U have for me? Kumaara Hey Known2U, still loving our replies?..... 
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Edited by
msharmony
on
Sat 11/08/14 11:49 AM
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to answer the question, aside from the added personal info,,
when handing a narcissistic personality (and I have encountered my share), I have found the best way to communicate is to make them 'feel' as if its about them for example, say you want them to wash the dishes or run the vacuum(if they ever have),,,,simply make sure to put them on a pedestal instead of belittle them instead of ' why don't you ever pick up after yourself?' I would try 'You are so much better at vacuuming than I am,, the floor just looked so clean when you did it. Can you show me how you did that?'...lol this also implies in conversation also,, throw in some compliment in whatever you say, they get distracted with themselves, and often loose the addiction to being 'right' or 'better' ,, just long enough to actually communicate instead of belittle or argue,,, ,,sometimes you really do catch more bees with honey, that is, if you are wanting to catch bees,,,, |
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to answer the question, aside from the added personal info,, when handing a narcissistic personality (and I have encountered my share), I have found the best way to communicate is to make them 'feel' as if its about them for example, say you want them to wash the dishes or run the vacuum(if they ever have),,,,simply make sure to put them on a pedestal instead of belittle them instead of ' why don't you ever pick up after yourself?' I would try 'You are so much better at vacuuming than I am,, the floor just looked so clean when you did it. Can you show me how you did that?'...lol this also implies in conversation also,, throw in some compliment in whatever you say, they get distracted with themselves, and often loose the addiction to being 'right' or 'better' ,, just long enough to actually communicate instead of belittle or argue,,, ,,sometimes you really do catch more bees with honey, that is, if you are wanting to catch bees,,,, I think you gave him the answer he was looking for. However you have forgotten to give him appropriate compliment to make a valid point. But perhaps it's not even necessary? Some people will do the rest on their own and give themselves a compliment (IF they apply given advice correctly), so you do not have to. |
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Edited by
msharmony
on
Sat 11/08/14 01:00 PM
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did I forget the compliment? guess I didn't have enough info to provide one,, but he SAYS he is very good looking,,,(I haven't bothered yet to go to the profile)
so maybe when people are good looking others hold them to a higher standard and 'nag' as a way to cry out for help in reaching that standard of awesomeness themselves,,  better? |
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did I forget the compliment? guess I didn't have enough info to provide one,, but he SAYS he is very good looking,,,(I haven't bothered yet to go to the profile) so maybe when people are good looking others hold them to a higher standard and 'nag' as a way to cry out for help in reaching that standard of awesomeness themselves,, better? Excellent!
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This is funny, he says he looks good but his wife is the narcissist.
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Hey People, I love the posts U folks bring-up & the reply that follows. I'm a 34 year old married man, have a Son who is 10 months old. I look good, very homely, Family is everything to me. When I step-out of home, there are several people at workplace who just wants to catch Ur attention, talk to U & be around with U. But, when I'm at home, My spouse is very nagging. She definitely has narcissist traits. She doesn't understand when I attempt to make her understand of her nagging behavior. It really hurts, honestly. All I do is... Home >Work >Home. What advise do U have for me? Kumaara Try marriage counseling maybe she feels somewhat neglected or like you do not care maybe she needs to get out of the house. You can not diagnose narcissism. Only a liceensed professional can. You may find that you could be partly at fault for some of the behaviors due to the fact that it takes teo to create the issues in a marriage and two to heal them. |
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WARNING...
Self pity can and does create narcissist... this warning brought to you by the world institute of narcissism studies and the counsel of the world emotion surgeon generals committee. |
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