Make ya own dang sammich and get me some jello while ya up!


See do we really want them to talk? Some ok maybe but really just look pretty and rub me with lotion.

No.
But it is difficult to start a conversation where you are guaranteed the person you want to converse with will respond when you want them to, how you want them to, and it leads to fulfilling your ultimate ulterior motives and the ulterior motives are shared by both people.

Might as well be a cop and ask "is it really that difficult for potential suspects to just answer our questions?"



Depends on the guy, or person, as lots of people do it.
Main reasons IMO are:
1. They don't want to take responsibility. If they "nudge" you and you respond with something hurtful, or rejectful, or nothing at all, well, they can blame the nudge. It's not something they "said."
And online, that's really all anyone has...what they "said."

2. A lot of people are just online seeking social validation.
If they just "nudge" you and you come back and are all attracted, well then they must be hot, worth pursuing. They only had to "nudge" you and you started chasing them for information.
That's validating.
2.5 If they nudge, and you don't come back, well they didn't put a lot of their personality into what they "said," just a nudge, so you aren't really rejecting them, you don't know enough to reject "them."

3. They've "nudged" 3,223 other people in the last 10 minutes.
That's a lot quicker than sending out email after email after email.

4. They want immediate gratification. They've just signed on, and they want to talk now.
Maybe they're scared if they sit and type an email, you'll sign off in that time, or you'll find someone else. Or maybe you aren't online at all at the moment so why waste the time writing email not even knowing if you're online or going to come back ever.
Better to just "nudge" and see how long it takes you to respond.

5. Social dominance games much like the social validation games.
If you chase them after they nudge you, they feel they have "power" or "position" over you. Dissonance in social position helps engender a deeper demand for social reciprocity on your part.
In a way forcing you to commit to future interaction.

I agree, kicking a gal in the a*s is not a good ice breaker. Mingle should have a kick in the b*l*s symbol too.. so the gals can just .. give it back to them

Haha. Even better would be a "Hell No, never in a million years" emoji. How often I'd love to have used that!

For observation purposes. here is a typical response from a woman that men lose interest with fast. It just stinks with the cliche of,"us men just want to get the woman in the sack story". By the time you are 40 plus this gets so boring. When you write so many nice messages just to be ignored, just how much enthusiasm can a man have left. It does not feel such a big waste of time if you begin with a small introduction then if she likes you and replies then messages will become longer as there looks like a glimmer of worth while interest.

WORD. Just talk and enjoy reading other posts. The regulars are pretty cool. I'm gonna try and post more to join this funky bunch.

Down in the desert

Kinda addicted to it, coz it is funny

Is it really that hard to start a conversation? I mean, I don't get it why guys send nudges, wink at you or kick you in the butt instead of sending you a line or two.

Maybe it's their way to start a conversation - waiting for the very first move or a reaction of the lady .. to see if the girl is interested enough to get in touch or not.

Could be a lack of confidence as well .. coz it's very important to start the conversation right .. to make the other party interested .. otherwise there won't be a second chance.

Or these guys have looked at your profile, but have actually no intention to go further, but being nice fellows, they leave a sign by sending a nudge that have noticed you as an attractive girl.

Personally I get nudges from the girls .. and always respond the same way .. will nudge back, which usually leads nowhere.

Starting a mutually pleasing conversation is actually complicated .. sending a line or two is not just like that .. it means you expect to get also a response .. but it happens pretty rarely, if the girl responds you the same way .. aka is ready to talk to you or start something .. usually every attempt to get someone's attention by sending a message gets zero response .. and knowing that is not encouraging enough to make you waste your time or test your luck.

But what could be worst than getting nudges or winks from someone with unfilled profile and has no photo? How can a woman respond to that?

There is no need to respond at all .. just ignore them .. OR send a kick in the butt

Could be everything what you've said. Good point.

But what could be worst than getting nudges or winks from someone with unfilled profile and has no photo? How can a woman respond to that?

It's no harder for men than for women.I've never had a wink or a nudge from a guy but I've got pages of nudges from women And no I don't want any winks or nudges from men thank you.