Community > Misc Advice, Help & Support

Topic: I hate my life
Mike6615 Joined Sun 09/18/16 Posts: 1503	Sun 05/05/19 08:16 PM
Everything you state indicates you need some professional help. Please make an appointment with a mental health counselor or your condition may get worse. Good luck!

Mark Joined Sat 01/12/19 Posts: 49	Sun 05/05/19 09:08 PM
I have seen one but I can't see him anymore because I think my insurance expired

Mike6615 Joined Sun 09/18/16 Posts: 1503	Mon 05/06/19 08:07 AM
I have seen one but I can't see him anymore because I think my insurance expired You might qualify for free or low-cost treatment under certain state or local programs. Please look into them. Good luck.

Mark Joined Sat 01/12/19 Posts: 49	Mon 05/06/19 08:37 AM
I don't know if I trust anyone besides the doctor I had before

Mark Joined Sat 01/12/19 Posts: 49	Mon 05/06/19 08:41 AM
for people that say don't worry about getting married and all that I am worried because I feel like a complete failure knowing that everyone has a happy life except for me

Mark Joined Sat 01/12/19 Posts: 49	Mon 05/06/19 08:46 AM
I'm also tired of getting ignored or not getting any responses on here or any other site I especially hate when people flake out on me I should just give up already knowing I'm destined to be alone because God hates me

jaish Joined Wed 03/20/19 Posts: 1383	Mon 05/06/19 11:08 AM
I'm also tired of getting ignored or not getting any responses on here or any other site I especially hate when people flake out on me I should just give up already knowing I'm destined to be alone because God hates me It's not so; just that a lot of advises have piled up and after Mike's comment we are all worried whether we are contributing or confusing and damaging / because some suggestions are contrarian; frankly, the window of love shuts down by 28. this is my opinion. what one can hope for is a working relationship / rubbing each other's back. Your case is further complicated because you want MMA title and a girl; and Option A: the right girl would respect / come with the title. Option B: the right girl would support you to strive for the title So while we may understand that warriors need their women; none of us have the experience of being professional fighters You have also mentioned losing your father and so on. I think warriors need to be mentored by a former warrior; a boss who may even be totalitarian to get you ready; given the time constraints. i'm in India where jobs, any jobs are hard to get; forget dream jobs. But some of us convert / grow from boring ones, to take up new opportunities. But yeah, who will point these thing out? E.O.C. --xx-- if you are serious (considering you are able to analyse & write well) i would suggest reading Dr. Eric Berne's books, any one, written in the 70s though. As i mentioned earlier, a book can be a mentor and you may even start a new conversation on this thread; who knows. (a few of us may be interested to join in such a new conversation; I certainly will; If i'm around) or it could be your MMA story in Sports Section taking this 'hate' thread has now become exhausting my suggestion is lets take some time out. Also because if you check the forum rules it implies that while debates and discussions are allowed; any counselling, particularly since yours appears to be critical in nature; is frowned upon. best of luck

Mike6615 Joined Sun 09/18/16 Posts: 1503	Mon 05/06/19 12:16 PM
I'm also tired of getting ignored or not getting any responses on here or any other site I especially hate when people flake out on me I should just give up already knowing I'm destined to be alone because God hates me Don't worry about being ignored on these sites; focus on getting the help you need. And remember, God is on your side and wants you to be mentally healthy and happy.

Tom4Uhere Joined Sat 12/17/16 Posts: 16240	Mon 05/06/19 04:26 PM Edited by Tom4Uhere on Mon 05/06/19 04:31 PM
I'm also tired of getting ignored or not getting any responses on here or any other site I especially hate when people flake out on me I should just give up already knowing I'm destined to be alone because God hates me Holy Crap on a Cracker! Building Healthy Self-Esteem http://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-integrationist/201308/building-healthy-self-esteem 1. Ask yourself, “What is it that I value?” Another way to phrase this may be, “What qualities do I admire in others.” Even if we may envy someone’s swanky pad or trim thighs, chances are, what we respect about them has a lot more to do with how they conduct themselves, what’s important to them, and how we feel when we are with them. Is this person charitable? Kind? Loving? Helpful? These qualities are likely the ones we, too, possess, or would like to further develop in ourselves. 2. Once you have answered the above, ask yourself, “What do I need to do to live in accordance with what I value?” For example, if you value charity, find ways in which you can be charitable. This could be through formal volunteer work or by helping out a friend or loved one. There is a good reason that people all over the world know who Mother Teresa was, and why no one ever mentions her thighs or hairdo. Her charity and service to others were legendary. 3. Practice (self) forgiveness. Often it feels safer to consciously focus on something external or material that seems “not good enough,” and not on the things we wish we’d done differently. I emphasize to patients that making mistakes is a normal part of learning. No one walks right out of the womb – we first learn to sit up, and crawl, and toddle - falling innumerable times – before we can walk, and run, and play! Acknowledge what you’d like to do differently now – the only time period in which we can act to make things better. 4. Set goals that are discreet, measurable, and in accordance with what you value. Leave room for goals that are fun when possible. Realizing you can accomplish the things you set out to do – even mundane things – is part of how we build self-esteem. 5. Ask yourself each day, “For what am I grateful?” Everyone – and I do mean everyone -- if they are willing -- can find at least one small thing each day for which they can be thankful. Even when things seem bad, we can be grateful for someone’s kindness, for some part of our body that works (even if we are ill), for the sun shining, for the lessons we can learn even from the difficult people in our lives, etc. 6. Visualize yourself shedding the harsh, outdated ideas about yourself that you (really!) no longer need. They actually don’t do any good. See yourself feeling as you’d like to feel, doing the things that are most meaningful to you. 7. If you find yourself needing additional help with the above, it’s worth consulting with a mental health professional. The ONLY person that can make you into who you want to be is YOU.

Final Dreamz Joined Tue 06/18/19 Posts: 391	Fri 07/26/19 02:22 AM
Yes seeking professional help is advised however... even in such case it is up to you to stand up as a man these little pills they prescribe they only help you with half the battle the rest is 80 percent mental of self will and determination that this is your moment you own this... and while the world doesn't understand some of us do... Your best friend is yourself cause he knows everything about you and things you hide from everyone even yourself. Your dreams for example forget your job... for now. What do you want out of life? Are you on Mingle for love, retribution or simply put to find some people that care? Because you found the right cornerstone and it's still up to you what to do with your life... Wish I could help more but it's always up to you... Work and make every day doing the best you can that's all you can really do...

ragin' cajun Joined Wed 07/10/19 Posts: 550	Fri 07/26/19 12:45 PM
I'm probably going to end up in a group home anyway because I'm too retarded to do anything also I have seen a doctor but I don't know if I want to see another one because when I do see one some bull ** always happens to where I can never see them again and the one I was seeing recently is like a father to me also every friend I make is either retarded and are job less losers living off the government playing Pokemon all day or ****** that ignore me as time goes by or people that use me for my money Based on how you write, you don't seem "retarded" to me. Your writing is very clear. The only thing wrong with it is punctuation. Therefore, I don't see a lack of intelligence. What I see more is a lack of self-confidence. That could be caused by any number of reasons, including some form of disability. From what you've said, I think it's safe to say you have a learning disability of some kind. But not all learning disabilities are equal. Maybe you were judged for being a special needs class, but that does not necessarily mean your disability is anywhere near as severe as others you have known. From what you have shared, I can deduce that you already recognize this which is why you feel you have not been judged fairly. Two of my neighbors have Autism. They live by themselves in their own apartments. But they are not fully functional socially. They put forth a good effort though, and I don't mind having them as neighbors. In fact, I drive one of them to various places he needs to go. We even talk about doing things together, like eating at a restaurant or going bowling. I had another friend who had Autism, and he's a graduate of Yale University. I use them as examples, not a diagnosis. I have known another person with a Traumatic Brain Injury. He is functional and self-supporting. Yet he also qualifies for disability. I have known people with schizophrenia who also were functional and self-supporting. My brother was diagnosed with ADHD at age 40. He has had a successful career, plus a wife and 2 sons. In the field, there is a saying: "You are not your disability." In other words, if you identify yourself solely by your disability rather than your other attributes, then you alone are responsible for limiting what you can accomplish. It is your mindset, not your disability, that ends up limiting you. You may not be able to change your disability, but you CAN change your mindset. Me? I have an anxiety disorder. I have a depressive disorder which has caused numerous episodes that I can recall going back to age 5. I likely have a third undiagnosed disorder. Among the disorders considered by psychiatrists have been Borderline Personality Disorder, ADHD, and possibly mild Autism. I was treated for anxiety and depression. I no longer receive medication nor therapy. I have been through 3 Intensive Outpatient Programs plus individual therapy. The biggest hurdle for me was to stop defining myself by "what is wrong with me". It's okay if you don't want to tell us your disability. That's your decision, and we can respect that. I, for one, am not going to judge you based on your disability or your friends (I don't even know them!). In the end, if you want help or support from the Mingle2 community, then we need to fully understand your personal situation. Otherwise, most of the advice we offer won't be good nor appropriate.

ragin' cajun Joined Wed 07/10/19 Posts: 550	Fri 07/26/19 12:53 PM
I'm probably going to end up in a group home anyway because I'm too retarded to do anything also I have seen a doctor but I don't know if I want to see another one because when I do see one some bull ** always happens to where I can never see them again and the one I was seeing recently is like a father to me also every friend I make is either retarded and are job less losers living off the government playing Pokemon all day or ****** that ignore me as time goes by or people that use me for my money Based on how you write, you don't seem "retarded" to me. Your writing is very clear. The only thing wrong with it is punctuation. Therefore, I don't see a lack of intelligence. What I see more is a lack of self-confidence. That could be caused by any number of reasons, including some form of disability. From what you've said, I think it's safe to say you have a learning disability of some kind. But not all learning disabilities are equal. Maybe you were judged for being a special needs class, but that does not necessarily mean your disability is anywhere near as severe as others you have known. From what you have shared, I can deduce that you already recognize this which is why you feel you have not been judged fairly. Two of my neighbors have Autism. They live by themselves in their own apartments. But they are not fully functional socially. They put forth a good effort though, and I don't mind having them as neighbors. In fact, I drive one of them to various places he needs to go. We even talk about doing things together, like eating at a restaurant or going bowling. I had another friend who had Autism, and he's a graduate of Yale University. I use them as examples, not a diagnosis. I have known another person with a Traumatic Brain Injury. He is functional and self-supporting. Yet he also qualifies for disability. I have known people with schizophrenia who also were functional and self-supporting. My brother was diagnosed with ADHD at age 40. He has had a successful career, plus a wife and 2 sons. In the field, there is a saying: "You are not your disability." In other words, if you identify yourself solely by your disability rather than your other attributes, then you alone are responsible for limiting what you can accomplish. It is your mindset, not your disability, that ends up limiting you. You may not be able to change your disability, but you CAN change your mindset. Me? I have an anxiety disorder. I have a depressive disorder which has caused numerous episodes that I can recall going back to age 5. I likely have a third undiagnosed disorder. Among the disorders considered by psychiatrists have been Borderline Personality Disorder, ADHD, and possibly mild Autism. I was treated for anxiety and depression. I no longer receive medication nor therapy. I have been through 3 Intensive Outpatient Programs plus individual therapy. The biggest hurdle for me was to stop defining myself by "what is wrong with me". It's okay if you don't want to tell us your disability. That's your decision, and we can respect that. I, for one, am not going to judge you based on your disability or your friends (I don't even know them!). In the end, if you want help or support from the Mingle2 community, then we need to fully understand your personal situation. Otherwise, most of the advice we offer won't be good nor appropriate. I'm disable traumatic brain injury have siezures and mild Autism but I see the world as beautiful place look around at all the beauty don't let your disability define who you are you are not your disability

Final Dreamz Joined Tue 06/18/19 Posts: 391	Fri 07/26/19 05:37 PM
I wouldn't even define a disability as anything but a gift... john Nash suffered from schizophrenia that movie was based off him for his contributions to mathematics, Einstein himself had Asphbergers his son suffered from schizophrenia... the interenet everything electronic we use today as a tool for vital knowledge would not be without the aid of Nicolai Tesla which is great he developed the first form of electrictity… when he was not busy dealing with heavy autism...

Final Dreamz Joined Tue 06/18/19 Posts: 391	Fri 07/26/19 05:42 PM
Plato once described this that mankind used to look as madness but anything but a gift otherwise the greatest contributions to art science philosophy could not be possible madness is a gift from the heavens... madness is from heaven where as sober sense is only human... the actual quote is more interesting than my lame attempts of remembering it :P

Alex Joined Thu 03/25/21 Posts: 8	Fri 04/16/21 04:39 PM
Time to buy your first house.

DoofusMaximus Joined Sat 04/28/18 Posts: 1861	Sat 01/01/22 09:25 AM Edited by DoofusMaximus on Sat 01/01/22 09:32 AM
That's nothing. I hate the very fabric of reality. I despise entrophy. The very fact that things decay from a pristine state is a defect in reality. Try living with that? Not only do I wish I never had to experience this reality, I hate the idea that I might live forever in any shape or form. All beauty in this reality is subject to decay. It doesn't matter what it is. The very fact that anything grows old at all is proof that this reality is defective. You can have it. Gladly, my time in this reality is almost up. Hopefully, it will be the end. I certainly don't want to go thru this again. Had these same thoughts. I would never do myself harm, but I'll be glad when the end-of-shift whistle blows. "It is an irksome task men have been given to do under the sun". However, I am very much looking forward to what is next -and eternity. The tendency toward decay -which is basically death -is a product of the opposite -a force which caused that potential in the first place -just as the presence of a voltage is the product of production of that voltage (think charged capacitor). From there, it is "just" a matter of circuit design, refreshing, efficiency, etc. (or even leaving the capacitor out of a circuit if desired). The fact that we decay within about 120 years -starting about the time we get the general idea about life (rather suspiciously) -does not mean it cannot be otherwise -that is a product of our design, not of overall reality. Life does not even have to require so much exhaustive effort -that is also a product of present design. It may be that we will always have to exert some sort of effort to maintain things, but it can be made a negligible amount compared to what it makes possible. Even when things are at their best here on earth, we spend most of our time and effort just keeping ourselves alive one way or another -with little time to simply enjoy or appreciate ("by the sweat of your brow will you have food to eat" as opposed to access to the tree of life!) -but that is a temporary situation. Even now we have learned to create more leisure time by being more efficient -but we also greatly appreciate it if we think back to difficult times -where otherwise we would not. Imagine if we were first immortal newbs unleashed on the entire universe! What a miserable mess we would have made! How long did it take us to invent something to destroy everything here? Thankfully, it is presently limited to this rock -and about a hundred years of personal experience. Our body design may also be changed to allow for greater efficiency and power over environment. We have actually found the clocks which determine our rate of decay -but the present situation -bound to this planet for now -does not make being eternal feasible. If that which is needed to maintain a state is always provided efficiently, there is no problem -or weariness. Even the tendency for the universe to collapse may theoretically be countered -like blowing up a balloon then tying it off rather than allowing it to simply go phthpthhthpthh until deflated again. We go through this so we don't have to go through it ever again! Otherwise, the tendency for us to choose it and cause it -choose decay and death in ignorance -remains. There is one very powerful natural force many fail to consider... and that is will. It is the power able to counter and redirect otherwise-natural tendencies. Given position, interface and opportunity, it is the most powerful of forces. "...that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God"

Ryan Joined Sat 01/01/22 Posts: 243	Sat 01/01/22 04:53 PM
for Christs sake.. you are 31! . your Mom most likely wants you to get the hell out.

katherine Joined Sat 02/05/22 Posts: 4	Sat 02/05/22 03:18 AM
Are you in a financial position to move? If not, I suggest setting aside money monthly or bi-weekly until you can afford to move out and live on your own or with roommates.

motowndowntown Joined Wed 11/19/08 Posts: 21307	Sat 02/05/22 09:32 AM
Thread is two years old. Dude is probably living in a van down by the river now.

jaish Joined Wed 03/20/19 Posts: 1383	Tue 02/08/22 04:12 AM
Thread is two years old. Dude is probably living in a van down by the river now. Two years! Funny, the following script in its entirety, makes more sense now. That's nothing. I hate the very fabric of reality. I despise entrophy. The very fact that things decay from a pristine state is a defect in reality. Try living with that? Not only do I wish I never had to experience this reality, I hate the idea that I might live forever in any shape or form. All beauty in this reality is subject to decay. It doesn't matter what it is. The very fact that anything grows old at all is proof that this reality is defective. You can have it. Gladly, my time in this reality is almost up. Hopefully, it will be the end. I certainly don't want to go thru this again. Had these same thoughts. I would never do myself harm, but I'll be glad when the end-of-shift whistle blows. "It is an irksome task men have been given to do under the sun". However, I am very much looking forward to what is next -and eternity. The tendency toward decay -which is basically death -is a product of the opposite -a force which caused that potential in the first place -just as the presence of a voltage is the product of production of that voltage (think charged capacitor). From there, it is "just" a matter of circuit design, refreshing, efficiency, etc. (or even leaving the capacitor out of a circuit if desired). The fact that we decay within about 120 years -starting about the time we get the general idea about life (rather suspiciously) -does not mean it cannot be otherwise -that is a product of our design, not of overall reality. Life does not even have to require so much exhaustive effort -that is also a product of present design. It may be that we will always have to exert some sort of effort to maintain things, but it can be made a negligible amount compared to what it makes possible. Even when things are at their best here on earth, we spend most of our time and effort just keeping ourselves alive one way or another -with little time to simply enjoy or appreciate ("by the sweat of your brow will you have food to eat" as opposed to access to the tree of life!) -but that is a temporary situation. Even now we have learned to create more leisure time by being more efficient -but we also greatly appreciate it if we think back to difficult times -where otherwise we would not. Imagine if we were first immortal newbs unleashed on the entire universe! What a miserable mess we would have made! How long did it take us to invent something to destroy everything here? Thankfully, it is presently limited to this rock -and about a hundred years of personal experience. Our body design may also be changed to allow for greater efficiency and power over environment. We have actually found the clocks which determine our rate of decay -but the present situation -bound to this planet for now -does not make being eternal feasible. If that which is needed to maintain a state is always provided efficiently, there is no problem -or weariness. Even the tendency for the universe to collapse may theoretically be countered -like blowing up a balloon then tying it off rather than allowing it to simply go phthpthhthpthh until deflated again. We go through this so we don't have to go through it ever again! Otherwise, the tendency for us to choose it and cause it -choose decay and death in ignorance -remains. There is one very powerful natural force many fail to consider... and that is will. It is the power able to counter and redirect otherwise-natural tendencies. Given position, interface and opportunity, it is the most powerful of forces. "...that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God" Gold. Got as far as, body-mind being a container for energy, a battery; discharged, nearly dead; and thankfully trickle charging now. Wrestling with the last para, yet Two years, whew!