Actually psychologically speaking, time should ensue following a break-up of any relationship lasting any span or length of time. This allows you to put to rest issues from previous relationship in order to not bring issues from the past relationship into the emerging romance. When issues left unattended, makes a self-destructive pattern into new or budding relationships.

If you meet someone that you are interested in, or think that this person could be someone that could be great for you, then why would you pass that up? Is it a risk? Sure it is. But Holy Crap.....if you stay secluded then you will never experience anything.

If your not pining away for another, you've been able to forgive and your heart is open then, like Goof said..ya may not want to let a good thing pass ya by.

If your still pissed off, still in love with that person and have you walls up, it may not really be fair to the 'new' person.

I dunno, I think some people can't be at peace alone.

Well, if ya can't enjoy your own company how can ya expect someone else to???

at peace?

Hardly. I seen some real basket cases throw themselves back into the dating pool before the bleeding has even stopped let alone giving wounds time to heal.

nope,just gotta make sure i hide my porn collection before she finds it

sound real healthy...think their still together now?

yep.

I get a kick out of how so many people make dating seem like a "chore". I feel that when people are wanting to date, then it turns into more "work" for them. Thus, you have endless frustration when the dating process is taking longer than you feel it should.

My point is this. If you are feeling that dating isn't something you want right now, then make the call to not date and deal with it. If you want to leave yourself open to the possibility of meeting a great man or woman, then do it. Don't make dating harder than it is.

Self imposed isolation is fine, but when your first friend or family member says "you need to get back out there" take the advice. Sometimes you just need to feel back in the swing of things to get yourself centered. I guess it's kind of realizing that "no, I don't have to be alone, but I can if I want too." Then you'll be back to breaking hearts in no time.

I do think you need to be at peace with yourself before you can give whole-heartedly to a relationship, but I do think folks use this as an excuse sometimes to stay or get out of relationships...sorta the whole 'It's not you, it's me' or 'I need space' thing.

I've been hearing that for awhile now (months!), but I just can't find anyone who interests me or appeals to me at all.

Well that's a completely different beast.

Roaming, I hear what you are saying. Unfortunately friends and family just want you to be you again and they think finding someone else will get you there. I still have some me work to do I think.

Let the horse find its own water to drink! The more they try to help, well it doesn't help. Find your own Water!

Ok. I am gonna implode here. Why on God's green Earth is it that we make up these excuses to not date? If you have a legitimate reason, then fine. If you need time to heal, then by all means....heal thy self. But if you ask a question like this, then it means that you really do want to date.....you just don't know if you can get past the fear of the risk. Soryy...but it is true.

Example. I am not dating now because I have chosen not to. I have other things going on right now that dating has taken a back seat. Now, could a woman come along and blow my mind, thus making me change my stance on this? Of course. I am not narrow minded that I won't admit that it could happen. I might get lonely every once in awhile, and yeah....having a woman to be with is awesome. But I am also comfortable with my choice now, and thus comfortable with the path I have chosen. But if a woman did come along, and she and I hit it off, then yeah....I would make alterations to my path.

I'll second this. People in relationships seem to be uncomfortable with doing things on their own or taking some down time. Many seem to think you have to be with your partner every minute of the day, talking or doing something.

It's one of the reasons I can't stand the question "What are you thinking about?" If I thought it was important, I'd talk it out with ya... but in general, it's really not all that big a deal.

At peace? No. Confident? Yes. And be true to yourself and to them about what your expectations are in a relationship.

Once at peace with yourself before starting a new relationship and you finally put yourself out there, you begin to realize how many people have'nt done the same.

It's great for yourself, but with others it's sometimes best to be a little naive.

So I would say Yes you need to be at peace with yourself, but it should'nt be an excuse not to try.