They don't run in the streets. I don't believe I gave the impression that they do, or that I was ok with people who let their animals do that.

Are people making excuses for their pets being uncontrolled where you live? Is that why this is such a big deal?

I never assume anyone's dog is bad, unless or until it behaves that way. As for being worried about one biting me, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it, but I'm pretty sure most owner's never mean to let their dog harm anyone. Dogs act on instinct. They're more intelligent than people give them credit for. My aunt had two dogs. The black, small one, used to constantly jump up at me, but I knew I'd be okay because he was just excited to see me. As long as I knew why it was jumping up at me I was fine. I knew not to ever get too close to it's face though, as it didn't like anyone doing that. It was quite playful. I'll happilly play fetch with a dog no problem. They seem to like it when I massage their ears.

I am not saying yours do but many pet owners here do let their pets run loose. The paramedic that got bit is a prime example of people not keeping control of their pets even in their home. I could see if it was a criminal that came through the door but the owner of the house let the paramedic in to help someone in the house.

Thank yourself lucky you never got bit as its very traumatizing. Anytime a midsize dog comes near me; I freak out.

Yes, its also necessary for them to look a certain way, smell a certain way, be a certain height, race and be in a particular tax bracket. They only look for conditional relationships, who you are is the least of their concerns...

Sometimes it almost seems that way.



People are making excuses for their pets HERE





Interesting priorities and perspectives

I, personally prefer adult human relationships over love relationships with animals

They aren't mutually exclusive and it's a false dichotomy. Women love their children and will even put their needs before yours but that doesn't mean that I'm doing anything apart from cutting down my options if I decide that I don't want to date women that have kids. I've read your posts and you're saying that you prefer the company of people but you're also saying that you can't actually find anyone that wants to date you. I can and I've never had a woman telling me that I'm not her type because I have a dog, apart from here on this forum. I'm not looking to jump into marriage or living with someone and I've never had a live in girlfriend. Having a dog doesn't stop me from dating, or going on holidays if I want to do that. I have family that are more than happy to look after my dog for me if I need to go somewhere where I can't take her. My ex girlfriend didn't want me bringing my dog along when we went out together and she didn't want me bringing my dog to her house because she wanted to relax without dogs there demanding attention and I went along with that, even though she would start an argument about anything.

The majority of people have no problem at all with dogs and many people really like them and see it as a plus. The last girlfriend that I had did ask me if I wanted to go for a walk as our first date because I have a dog and she did say to me that her first impressions when she saw me and my dog were good. Everybody that I know likes my dog and quite often people are more interested in the dog than they are in me. There may be some people out there that care for their pets or kids more than they care for the opposite sex but you can tell quite a lot about a person from how they treat their pets or children and it's a bit like something that somebody said on here about meeting family giving you a better idea of what someone is like. It is all about compatibility but it's more about judging someone's character than anything. Seeing what sort of mother my ex girlfriend was helped to give me a better insight into what sort of woman that she was and I am sure that women make those sorts of judgments when they see me with my dog. It's really no different from asking what someone does for a living, or what they do in their spare time. If a guy is a workaholic he will probably be a crap boyfriend or husband but if he gets the balance right there's no reason for it to be a problem unless you are a control freak that wants you to be his whole world, or if your own lifestyle makes dating impractical.

KLC the only thing I am "passionate" about is lack of consideration, and some of the opinions on here that I read that seem to "expect" that others must tolerate their animals. That is selfish, inconsiderate and immature. For the most part I can get along just fine with "considerate" pet owners. I used to have several pets.

I now have no pets (health, lifestyle, and convenience reasons).

I dated someone who was inconsiderate about forcing his pet on me, and bringing it into my home which can introduce fleas and pet hair/dander that I am somewhat allergic to. TBH it had a big influence on my decision to simply call it quits.

I think as long as a pet owner is considerate there would be no problem....at least for me. But I admit I would always have to have some space in my dwelling that was always pet free...like a den or office. I would not want to do pet "duties" but I am a very clean person and confident that I 'd get "stuck" with the pet duties because of that. I also would want my bedroom pet free. So there are some circumstances where I could tolerate a pet, but most pet owners would not be willing to understand those needs.

I find it odd that someone would place a pet before a loved one. But I definitely understand that they often do, and it most certainly is part of the compatability equation, I agree.

I do most of my animal loving out in the wild. :)

For those who just don;t "get it" that they should restrain their animals...I have the law on my side....'nuff said. The problem is not that EVERYONE needs to learn to behave around dogs. Some may have no interest in that. dog owners need to realize that (I think most do.)

this is the reality. They are %100 responsible for their pets and it is all on the owner. Like it or not, opinion really does not matter there as far as incidents off of the owners property/home.

Correction: 1) company of people need not involve "dating". Friendship does not equate to courtship. 2)I have not encountered women here with whom I choose to spend time. Most are far away; some are obsessed with pets, children, food, entertainment, etc; very few are physically fit or active (my obsession); and none seem compatible (for various reasons).

If someone remarkable came along, wonderful -- if not, I am quite content without "dating" or "seeing someone". A solo, unattached lifestyle has many advantages -- without drama, obligations and/or imported baggage.

The forums and profiles seem more a form of entertainment or fantasy than a serious attempt toward relationships.

You don't think men do that? Many men have height/age/weight requirements for women, as well as other requirements.

Which people are doing this? Those who wrote what you talked about in your OP? People in this thread? Women you're interested in?

And that's exactly what it comes down to. People are passionate about different things. Getting upset because someone has different passions/preferences/whatever you want to call them than you do is pretty silly. There are lots of people out there. Find the ones who fit with you well, rather than trying to change those who don't.

I do find that some who don't like pets assume that others' pets can just be given up if need be. Being a pet owner is a huge responsibility. If someone gives up their pet at the drop of a hat because the person they're dating says they should, they're not being a responsible pet owner.

I personally DO NOT put pets over people nor do I force them on anyone.
I have a few relatives that are scared to death of dogs so when they are over I keep the dogs downstairs.
They are only here a few short hours and not that often so its ok.
My point is I am responsible to keep my dogs out of harms way ,as well as keeping people out of harms way of my dogs.
That's why anybody I date who will be at my house more often MUST love pets.
I once made the terrible mistake of dating a guy that didn't like dogs and I caught him kicking my dog for no reason...yes for no reason...I saw him do it.
I will never ever put my dogs in that position again

Being considerate goes both ways. Anyone I am with has to tolerate my pets if they come over, because my pets live here too. I would not lock them away, just because someone is coming to visit. It would be inconsiderate of someone to expect that. Luckily, I've never had a problem with anyone in that regard. The two cats I have are easy to get along with and no one has ever had a problem with them. If they did, we just wouldn't be a good match.

Since you ask, TawtStrat, for one, is vigorously making excuses for a pet ("just being friendly")

Although everyone is entitled to their chosen order of priorities, I choose to not get in line behind pets, children and religion (though other people may find it acceptable).

I opened the thread after a site sent me five "matches" -- four of which had one or more of the "qualifiers" mentioned (and the fifth appeared to outweigh me considerably).

If you (generic term) encountered a man who was (hypothetically) an ideal mate in every way EXCEPT "loving" pets, animals and god (perhaps neutral regarding all three), would you reject the relationship?

Yeah, meeting someone through being on the forums is unlikely. I'll agree with you about that.

I can't really conclude anything from your post here and from other things that you have said apart from that you aren't really that interested in women and that romance is such a low priority for you that most women would just see you as being too set in your ways and selfish even. Been there myself. I had a girlfriend that gave me a lot of drama because she thought that I was like that. If you aren't enthusiastic about doing the things that they want to do and just want to carry on doing all of your single guy stuff and prioritise that over their needs they aren't going to be happy. It is about getting the balance right and not just wanting everything your own way.

SweetestGirl, it really isn't one hundred percent the owner's responsibility. If someone has a cat and it scratches me, that's my fault. I've never been scratched by a cat or a dog that attacked me and it's almost always people doing stupid things that the animals find threatening. In my opinion, knowing how to behave around animals is like having road sense and knowing how to cross the road. It may be the driver's responsibility to watch out for pedestrians and other road users but someone that just jumps in front of traffic without looking is an idiot and drivers can only do so much to avoid accedents that are caused by idiots, unless you want to go back to everyone driving at five miles an hour with people walking in front of their cars waving red flags.

I have no idea what it's like where you live but the UK is a nation of animal lovers and there being dogs and cats everywhere is just part of the culture. Most people let their cats out to just roam about on their own and nobody apart from some sort of oddball has a problem with cats doing that. In most places here a dog would be pounded if it was wandering the streets on it's own but a large number of people don't use a leash and I have dogs coming up to me all the time, even in the city centre where there are crowds and busy traffic. They only bother me sometimes because I have a dog myself and dogs will either want to play with other dogs, or fight or mate with them. If you just ignore them or shoo them away they leave you alone but dogs do smell fear and screaming kids and hysterical adults will seem threatening to a dog. The only obligation that a dog owner really has is to watch out for people like that. If I pass a bus stop and there's a woman there with her kids and my dog wants to say hello to them I let her and a lot of children like petting my dog. If they don't they just back away and yes, sometimes they might show a bit of fear but I believe that showing people that dogs are not terrifying helps them to get over those irrational phobias.

So, by people, you meant person. Ok.

You started this thread generalizing about women, based on a few matches, complaining about these "qualifiers." Then you gave some of your own, based on wanting to be placed as a higher priority.

If those are important preferences for someone, then someone who doesn't do those things would not be an ideal mate.

Well said Sweetestgirl and yep I dated pet owners that tried to stick me with taking care of their pets but I refused to take care of them.