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| Topic: why do people think... | |
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Morning urine smells best. Especially when you do it in a ziplock bag, zip it closed, and overhand toss it onto a reckless drivers windshield. SPLASH!!! Then it runs down and gets into your heater defroster vents. Worse than spilled bongwater in your car. "Ewwwww! Dude! What's that smell"? "Uh, that eau de morning trucker piss".
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Edited by
lighthouselover
on
Tue 07/28/09 08:26 AM
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<---texts boogers while driving. Gonna snot your headlights because you've been following me for 20 miles with your high beams on. Ooops! No boogers? Just blew your nose? That's ok. Reaches into ashtray and pulls out a tube of daisy BBs for a BB gun. Pours 10 to 20 of them into hand. Rolls down window. Holds hand out with BBs. Drops them straight down. At 70 miles per hour they bounce and spin and turn into little bullets smashing out your inconsiderate high beam headlites. One headlight dark. Two headlites dark. You're on the shoulder with your flashers on. Ooops. Don't make me angry. Ben franklin stores had a sale on kids toys. Ball and jacks? I bought em all. Steel jacks. Filled snapple tea bottles full of those steel jacks. Better than police stop sticks. Just toss a bottle out the window- 4 flats- right now. My snapple stopper. Just call me mcgyver. Or james blonde 006. *furiously taking notes* Great ideas!! I love it!! I have a whole bunch of BB's!! and we have a Dollar store here too!!! toys toys toys!!  Brilliant!!
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20 years. 3 million accident free miles. I can pick my nose while driving. I'm entitled to it. Its my right. Not a priveledge.
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I always attempt to let them know by screaming that very statement out the window.
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I can't tell you my worst of my mcgyver dangerous little highway tricks for bad drivers. Gotta keep some secrets. Let's just say um uh, certain ceramic materials are really small and are conducive to automotive glass. They won't see it or hear it until their side window explodes. Its called "The wakeup call". And I put up my disclaimer now- do not try any of these ideas at home. I'm a trained professional *******. Trying any dirty tricks may result in injury or death. I do not use or endorse these dirty road tricks unless I absolutely have to. I have a satphone and 911 is a voice command away. Check your expectations- always. That girl that cut you off? Well she might be in a hurry to the hospital because her grandmother is sick and she's worried and preoccupied. That guy that's driving like an absolute maniac? You didn't see his pregnant wife lying down in the back seat where her water broke and she's giving birth. He's on his way to ER! Checking your expectations works best while driving. Not physical confrontation or reckless wicked revenge tactics. Safety first. Pick boogers.
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that, just because they are driving in their car -- that they can pick their nose... I mean... I CAN SOOOO SEE YOU!!!... 
I noticed that as well...wonder why they do that...in plain sight 
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Thank you for your consideration and kleenex.
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I can't tell you my worst of my mcgyver dangerous little highway tricks for bad drivers. Gotta keep some secrets. Let's just say um uh, certain ceramic materials are really small and are conducive to automotive glass. They won't see it or hear it until their side window explodes. Its called "The wakeup call". And I put up my disclaimer now- do not try any of these ideas at home. I'm a trained professional *******. Trying any dirty tricks may result in injury or death. I do not use or endorse these dirty road tricks unless I absolutely have to. I have a satphone and 911 is a voice command away. Check your expectations- always. That girl that cut you off? Well she might be in a hurry to the hospital because her grandmother is sick and she's worried and preoccupied. That guy that's driving like an absolute maniac? You didn't see his pregnant wife lying down in the back seat where her water broke and she's giving birth. He's on his way to ER! Checking your expectations works best while driving. Not physical confrontation or reckless wicked revenge tactics. Safety first. Pick boogers.
and that is why you have all those miles accident free!! |
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Ever wonder where all those buggers go???? the ones that don't get eaten (gagging now) end up somewehre....never buy a used car that isn't THOROUGHLY detailed!!!!!
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that, just because they are driving in their car -- that they can pick their nose... I mean... I CAN SOOOO SEE YOU!!!...
I guess that is why I see people staring at me in my car, they just want to see if I am picking my nose!!!! |
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