Topic: Real Men: are most of us fake?
navygirl's photo
Sun 02/26/12 09:12 PM






He probably sleeps on the couch.


I'm a silver lining kind of guy. If I were to sleep on the couch, it would show her: a) That I cared about her comfort, b) Respected her wishes and c) That I was always going to protect her even when we are fighting.


How is sleeping on the couch protecting anyone?


The couch is closer than a friend's house or a hotel room. If someone comes through the front door, I'll be there to greet him. :wink:


So a woman can't protect herself? She has to have a man around?



Yes if she has a loaded gun.

In general, women are the physically weaker sex.



Damn, I better bulk up and increase the kick boxing workouts. bigsmile

no photo
Sun 02/26/12 09:50 PM
Edited by Jeanniebean on Sun 02/26/12 09:51 PM
Women don't "bulk up" unless they take steroids. I have a friend who can bench press more than most men and she is 5"2" and shows no muscle at all. She does professional weight lifting. She can work loading logs as good as any man. She lives in France.

You can learn some self defense, be very strong, and never show it, and you can kick a man's butt.

Because of hormones, men will bulk up but woman won't.


navygirl's photo
Sun 02/26/12 09:54 PM

Women don't "bulk up" unless they take steroids. I have a friend who can bench press more than most men and she is 5"2" and shows no muscle at all. She does professional weight lifting. She can work loading logs as good as any man. She lives in France.

You can learn some self defense, be very strong, and never show it, and you can kick a man's butt.

Because of hormones, men will bulk up but woman won't.



I was just trying to be funny; although I am showing a bit of muscle which was intimidating to my last date a few years ago. LOL

mscherbear's photo
Sun 02/26/12 11:30 PM

When women refer to such thing, I think they mean the want a man, not a boy or fake make I guess...

I'm gonna say a "real man' is a guy that is responsible and somewhat mature.

- Doesn't play the ever popular games.

- Has a job/car/own place.

- Can possibly provide in a monetary sense/cents.

You know, your basic quintessential perfect person.




Nailed it! drinker

oldhippie1952's photo
Mon 02/27/12 12:27 AM

I have always viewed it as a matter of opinion. What is right to one person may seem wrong to another. Why not talk about it and come to a mutual agreement together.
Isn't that how it should be?


Yes.

indianadave4's photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:07 AM
He probably sleeps on the couch.


This comment was never stated while I was married. If the ex would have made that statement my response would have been "if you do not like the sleeping arrangements the couch is not being used".

A couples bed belongs to him as much as it does to her. If she wants to fuss and fume all night that's her problem. I see no reason (except for abuse) that a wife has the legal or moral right to "Kick him out" of the bed that he normally sleeps in.

Just another image established by the movie and entertainment media.

Besides, I've never been one to go to bed without making an attempt to settle a disagreement that still existed between myself and wife or myself and one of our kids.

navygirl's photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:12 AM
Edited by navygirl on Mon 02/27/12 09:15 AM

He probably sleeps on the couch.


This comment was never stated while I was married. If the ex would have made that statement my response would have been "if you do not like the sleeping arrangements the couch is not being used".

A couples bed belongs to him as much as it does to her. If she wants to fuss and fume all night that's her problem. I see no reason (except for abuse) that a wife has the legal or moral right to "Kick him out" of the bed that he normally sleeps in.

Just another image established by the movie and entertainment media.

Besides, I've never been one to go to bed without making an attempt to settle a disagreement that still existed between myself and wife or myself and one of our kids.


I for one am for equality and if I am the one mad at him; I would gladly sleep on the couch. No point staying awaks all night in bed with someone I am pissed off with. At least on the couch; I will get a good night's sleep. There are worse things in life than sleeping on a couch. We all need a little time away from each other; even in bed.

no photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:17 AM






He probably sleeps on the couch.


I'm a silver lining kind of guy. If I were to sleep on the couch, it would show her: a) That I cared about her comfort, b) Respected her wishes and c) That I was always going to protect her even when we are fighting.


How is sleeping on the couch protecting anyone?


The couch is closer than a friend's house or a hotel room. If someone comes through the front door, I'll be there to greet him. :wink:


So a woman can't protect herself? She has to have a man around?


You must have run into some very bad guys in your life to get such a negative impression from the posts I have made.

Women can protect themselves, does that mean that a man shouldn't want to protect the woman he loves?


What I've said in response to your post has all to do with your posts and nothing to do with other men I know.

no photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:20 AM

What I've said in response to your post has all to do with your posts and nothing to do with other men I know.


I can't think of how you are getting such a negative impression from my posts.

no photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:29 AM
And I'm not sure why you were assuming what I said was about others. :smile:

MariahsFantasy's photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:42 AM





who's not real? every guy is real, the issue there is there are good guys and bad guys.


Girls always want the bad guys....personally I find the good blokes more of a catch.



same

but u can't always tell a book by it's cover....

just as u outgrow wanting the bad boy

the bad boys can become good men

not that I'd hold my breath counting on it - I try to see the good in everyonelaugh


Its all in his eyes, how he treats others. His heart. Being in his presence.

The reformed guy? Maybe, hell, the movie "Falling Down" was JUST an all-in-the-day type of floozy right? LOVE that guy btw. Totally honest, just batchit crazy out and proud!! What's better? Awww, sucha turn on. love




don't be fooled mariah -they're all either teasers or pleasersdrool


Yeah but hell, those are mah people. I attract dem like Liza to xanax. They flock to me, speak my language. The normal ones run from me. :tongue:

no photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:46 AM
Edited by Spidercmb on Mon 02/27/12 09:47 AM

And I'm not sure why you were assuming what I said was about others. :smile:


That's easy, you seemed to be responding to a nonexistent subtext to my posts, rather than my posts.

MariahsFantasy's photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:48 AM
Edited by MariahsFantasy on Mon 02/27/12 09:48 AM
How come NO ONE said anything about the wommens?? I know its a man's topic and all but hey, women really got the fake/catty/chit down when it comes to screwing over good men. I truly believe this might be a reason most men seem to give off the impression of being "fake" or maybe not all quite there; possibly insecure. One can argue, this chit starts from his childhood. Women have no idea how vital they are to their child's upbringing. Strong women deserve their cred. There are damagees and damagers, they exist on both corners mmk?

no photo
Mon 02/27/12 09:55 AM


And I'm not sure why you were assuming what I said was about others. :smile:


That's easy, you seemed to be responding to a nonexistent subtext to my posts, rather than my posts.


I agree. There seems to be a lot of assuming going on.

no photo
Mon 02/27/12 10:01 AM
Edited by singmesweet on Mon 02/27/12 10:02 AM


And I'm not sure why you were assuming what I said was about others. :smile:


That's easy, you seemed to be responding to a nonexistent subtext to my posts, rather than my posts.


Well, I was asking questions about your posts, rather than making statements about other things. Sorry if that was confusing. Though, you were making assumptions that I was talking about something completely different. So, that was confusing as well.

You want to protect the person you're with. Not a bad thing.

navygirl's photo
Mon 02/27/12 11:55 AM




For me a real man isn't afraid of a strong independent woman and can accept me as his equal as well as for who I am. However; that kind of man doesn't exist so guess it really doesn't matter anyways. :banana:


Men (especially older men) really aren't interested in dealing with a low self-esteem, high maintenance, woman. A man can tell if a woman has self confidence or low self-esteem in a matter of minutes of meeting her. A self confident woman is nice to be around.

Sometimes women trying to portray themselves as independent come across as arrogant. Presentation is the key.

A "Real Man" doesn't have to advertise it: his life portrays it.

An "Independent Woman" doesn't have to advertise it: her life demonstrates it.

Having to advertise and tell others is usually an indicator of a "wanna-be" personality.

A loving, self-confident woman is a prize. While some quantity of complimenting a woman is normal and (I'm sure) appreciated having to prop up low self-esteem gets old. Men are not afraid of a self-confident and independent woman. It's when she comes across as arrogant we walk away.


Being indepedent comes with self confidence. I don't have to advertise it or even say a word as men know it because I served in the military. If a man sees it as arrogance; then it just shows me how narrow-minded he is as he obviously can't think out of the box. This is the crap that society puts in our minds which is why I couldn't be bothered to date.


Ya need a military man, someone who's been through combat and has confidence, so he can accept you as you are!


I agree but they are all spoken for or married around here. The good ones get taken real fast. frown

no photo
Mon 02/27/12 12:07 PM





For me a real man isn't afraid of a strong independent woman and can accept me as his equal as well as for who I am. However; that kind of man doesn't exist so guess it really doesn't matter anyways. :banana:


Men (especially older men) really aren't interested in dealing with a low self-esteem, high maintenance, woman. A man can tell if a woman has self confidence or low self-esteem in a matter of minutes of meeting her. A self confident woman is nice to be around.

Sometimes women trying to portray themselves as independent come across as arrogant. Presentation is the key.

A "Real Man" doesn't have to advertise it: his life portrays it.

An "Independent Woman" doesn't have to advertise it: her life demonstrates it.

Having to advertise and tell others is usually an indicator of a "wanna-be" personality.

A loving, self-confident woman is a prize. While some quantity of complimenting a woman is normal and (I'm sure) appreciated having to prop up low self-esteem gets old. Men are not afraid of a self-confident and independent woman. It's when she comes across as arrogant we walk away.


Being indepedent comes with self confidence. I don't have to advertise it or even say a word as men know it because I served in the military. If a man sees it as arrogance; then it just shows me how narrow-minded he is as he obviously can't think out of the box. This is the crap that society puts in our minds which is why I couldn't be bothered to date.


Ya need a military man, someone who's been through combat and has confidence, so he can accept you as you are!


I agree but they are all spoken for or married around here. The good ones get taken real fast. frown



Both of my X-husbands were military men, war veterans. Viet Nam. That war only screwed them up royally.


navygirl's photo
Mon 02/27/12 12:14 PM






For me a real man isn't afraid of a strong independent woman and can accept me as his equal as well as for who I am. However; that kind of man doesn't exist so guess it really doesn't matter anyways. :banana:


Men (especially older men) really aren't interested in dealing with a low self-esteem, high maintenance, woman. A man can tell if a woman has self confidence or low self-esteem in a matter of minutes of meeting her. A self confident woman is nice to be around.

Sometimes women trying to portray themselves as independent come across as arrogant. Presentation is the key.

A "Real Man" doesn't have to advertise it: his life portrays it.

An "Independent Woman" doesn't have to advertise it: her life demonstrates it.

Having to advertise and tell others is usually an indicator of a "wanna-be" personality.

A loving, self-confident woman is a prize. While some quantity of complimenting a woman is normal and (I'm sure) appreciated having to prop up low self-esteem gets old. Men are not afraid of a self-confident and independent woman. It's when she comes across as arrogant we walk away.


Being indepedent comes with self confidence. I don't have to advertise it or even say a word as men know it because I served in the military. If a man sees it as arrogance; then it just shows me how narrow-minded he is as he obviously can't think out of the box. This is the crap that society puts in our minds which is why I couldn't be bothered to date.


Ya need a military man, someone who's been through combat and has confidence, so he can accept you as you are!


I agree but they are all spoken for or married around here. The good ones get taken real fast. frown


Both of my X-husbands were military men, war veterans. Viet Nam. That war only screwed them up royally.



Four of my ex-boyfriends were screwed up royally and none of them even served in the military.

no photo
Mon 02/27/12 12:16 PM
The last few guys I dated were in the military. There are a lot of military guys around here.

navygirl's photo
Mon 02/27/12 12:19 PM

The last few guys I dated were in the military. There are a lot of military guys around here.


The base here closed so all we have are reservists. I know most of them through playing with the band but as I said they are married. Great bunch of guys actually. Don't know any my age that are single.