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| Topic: Promiscuity | |
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@ cowboy .. You are gorgeous .. I can understand their frustration. Just means you have yet to find someone who shares your values. Keep looking.. She will come to you :-) Or a woman who loves herself enough to be able to wait till the emotional feelings get that far. I don't want to be just "another". And there's always that thought if she's "clean" down there so to speak if she moves to fast like that, makes me wonder how many other men she's done that with. I know I probably won't ever get to be somebody's first again, but I do know I want to be their last and I will some day, when I find a woman that wants a "last". |
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Edited by
CowboyGH
on
Wed 06/04/14 04:33 PM
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@ cowboy .. You are gorgeous .. I can understand their frustration. Just means you have yet to find someone who shares your values. Keep looking.. She will come to you :-) Or a woman who loves herself enough to be able to wait till the emotional feelings get that far. I don't want to be just "another". And there's always that thought if she's "clean" down there so to speak if she moves to fast like that, makes me wonder how many other men she's done that with. I know I probably won't ever get to be somebody's first again, but I do know I want to be their last and I will some day, when I find a woman that wants a "last". on the other hand if shes 'clean' that wont mean she is NOT promiscuous either. Maybe shes really handy with a condom. True, but it makes it less likely. I mean yeah someone could be with 100 people and never get anything and someone could be with 1 or maybe 2 and catch something. BUT, it narrows the chances of it if she has had less or not partners before. And her partner must have been unfaithful. Because the herpes virus can only survive a very short time outside the body. We're talking only a matter of seconds outside of the body. |
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People people people please let's all just have an orgy  hey franky i didn't overlook the offer, i'm down here on the floor waitin for the rest of the writhing hotbodies to join in...and i dont see anything promiscuous about havin' a little ca.. ca ..ca.. Cat Fight while we're going at it,either.... RaWR... 
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maybe you would be interested in this: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/evil-deeds/201111/what-motivates-sexual-promiscuity Great article showing both sides of the argument. This part stood out: Although both aspects of Eros, sex and love are not the same thing, and, indeed, sex can sometimes unconsciously be engaged in to defend against love and intimacy. Someone who has been severely wounded during childhood in the way Guggenheim reportedly was would typically avoid situations in which they could be rejected and abandoned again. That becomes their primary motivation: the frantic avoidance of abandonment, even if that means engaging in ultimately self-destructive, superficial, sometimes abusive sexual relationships with emotionally unavailable partners. This one as well: The question of whether Peggy Guggenheim engaged in promiscuous sexuality to avoid inner feelings of emptiness, anxiety and loss is very much to the point: Could that have been the reason she frantically flitted from bed to bed? Because of exactly what you cite May as saying: That in a purely sexual (i.e., merely physically intimate) relationship, "it is only a matter of time before the partners experience feelings of emptiness." This is exactly what sexual (or any) addiction is all about. The initial "high" from sex, from orgasm, from infatuation, from novelty, from romance rapidly fades away. And then the sex addict searches for that next "fix." That new lover. That next conquest or opportunity to "get off." Over and over and over. As with any addictive behavior, such a pattern can serve as a kind of self-medication, a way of managing or avoiding depression and anxiety, and of filling the vacuum created when feelings of sadness, grief or rage are chronically repressed. What really motivates sexually addictive or compulsive behavior? Extraordinary sex drive? I would disagree. It is more likely the same thing that primarily motivates any addictive behavior: Avoidance of anxiety, anger, grief or pain. Or, perhaps in this case, loneliness. That too can be a powerful motivation: avoidance. As Freud well understood. Sometimes even more motivating than the pleasure of sating one's sexual appetite and releasing sexual tension. |
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This part stood out: Although both aspects of Eros, sex and love are not the same thing, and, indeed, sex can sometimes unconsciously be engaged in to defend against love and intimacy. Someone who has been severely wounded during childhood in the way Guggenheim reportedly was would typically avoid situations in which they could be rejected and abandoned again. That becomes their primary motivation: the frantic avoidance of abandonment, even if that means engaging in ultimately self-destructive, superficial, sometimes abusive sexual relationships with emotionally unavailable partners. This one as well: The question of whether Peggy Guggenheim engaged in promiscuous sexuality to avoid inner feelings of emptiness, anxiety and loss is very much to the point: Could that have been the reason she frantically flitted from bed to bed? Because of exactly what you cite May as saying: That in a purely sexual (i.e., merely physically intimate) relationship, "it is only a matter of time before the partners experience feelings of emptiness." This is exactly what sexual (or any) addiction is all about. The initial "high" from sex, from orgasm, from infatuation, from novelty, from romance rapidly fades away. And then the sex addict searches for that next "fix." That new lover. That next conquest or opportunity to "get off." Over and over and over. As with any addictive behavior, such a pattern can serve as a kind of self-medication, a way of managing or avoiding depression and anxiety, and of filling the vacuum created when feelings of sadness, grief or rage are chronically repressed. What really motivates sexually addictive or compulsive behavior? Extraordinary sex drive? I would disagree. It is more likely the same thing that primarily motivates any addictive behavior: Avoidance of anxiety, anger, grief or pain. Or, perhaps in this case, loneliness. That too can be a powerful motivation: avoidance. As Freud well understood. Sometimes even more motivating than the pleasure of sating one's sexual appetite and releasing sexual tension. 17 afreakinbortions???!!!!!! Yeah an obvious one. The parts where he analyzed and question why were the best. |
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Edited by
kc0003
on
Wed 06/04/14 05:15 PM
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 what time does the orgy begin? i have other things to do...
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what time does the orgy begin? i have other things to do... 1, 2, 3 o'clock 4 o'clock rock....we're gonna rock... around...the clock tonite 
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Here's a question I pose for you all: Do you believe men and women who are promiscuous (go with lust and not feelings when they sleep around) have abandonment issues from their parents? Promiscuity most likely doesn't come from issues with parents, although it would be difficult to pinpoint a cause. For some it's a need to be loved and love equals sex. For others it's related to alcohol or drug abuse, where they lose inhibition through the addictive consumption. Some are simply addicted to sex. Others for vengeance, if they were cheated on; they will pay their partner back in the same fashion. The list keeps going. |
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Here's a question I pose for you all: Do you believe men and women who are promiscuous (go with lust and not feelings when they sleep around) have abandonment issues from their parents? Promiscuity most likely doesn't come from issues with parents, although it would be difficult to pinpoint a cause. For some it's a need to be loved and love equals sex. For others it's related to alcohol or drug abuse, where they lose inhibition through the addictive consumption. Some are simply addicted to sex. Others for vengeance, if they were cheated on; they will pay their partner back in the same fashion. The list keeps going. For some it's a need to be loved and love equals sex. And unfortunately for them in that way of thinking, love and sex have absolutely nothing to do with one another. One can love another and not have sex, and someone can have sex with another and not love them. People get these two confused often it seems these days. |
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maybe you would be interested in this: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/evil-deeds/201111/what-motivates-sexual-promiscuity Great article showing both sides of the argument. This part stood out: Although both aspects of Eros, sex and love are not the same thing, and, indeed, sex can sometimes unconsciously be engaged in to defend against love and intimacy. Someone who has been severely wounded during childhood in the way Guggenheim reportedly was would typically avoid situations in which they could be rejected and abandoned again. That becomes their primary motivation: the frantic avoidance of abandonment, even if that means engaging in ultimately self-destructive, superficial, sometimes abusive sexual relationships with emotionally unavailable partners. This one as well: The question of whether Peggy Guggenheim engaged in promiscuous sexuality to avoid inner feelings of emptiness, anxiety and loss is very much to the point: Could that have been the reason she frantically flitted from bed to bed? Because of exactly what you cite May as saying: That in a purely sexual (i.e., merely physically intimate) relationship, "it is only a matter of time before the partners experience feelings of emptiness." This is exactly what sexual (or any) addiction is all about. The initial "high" from sex, from orgasm, from infatuation, from novelty, from romance rapidly fades away. And then the sex addict searches for that next "fix." That new lover. That next conquest or opportunity to "get off." Over and over and over. As with any addictive behavior, such a pattern can serve as a kind of self-medication, a way of managing or avoiding depression and anxiety, and of filling the vacuum created when feelings of sadness, grief or rage are chronically repressed. What really motivates sexually addictive or compulsive behavior? Extraordinary sex drive? I would disagree. It is more likely the same thing that primarily motivates any addictive behavior: Avoidance of anxiety, anger, grief or pain. Or, perhaps in this case, loneliness. That too can be a powerful motivation: avoidance. As Freud well understood. Sometimes even more motivating than the pleasure of sating one's sexual appetite and releasing sexual tension.  These are very good articles Audrey!...Might be a good place for me to add a "real" life experience about a young teen I know (and love )...She is quite pretty, a straight A student, and sexually promiscuous...This is her story...She was three years old when her father began sexually molesting her...She was five when it was discovered as a result of her "acting out" sexually in kindergarden...Her promiscuity was explained to me this way....Because the incest began at such a young age she associates sexual arousal with love...I still cry and I still get angry when I am reminded of the psychological damage she will always suffer....So yes, there are many reason for promiscuous behavior and abuse is one of them...And can I just say I am really enjoying your thread young lady!...  |
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For some it's a need to be loved and love equals sex. And unfortunately for them in that way of thinking, love and sex have absolutely nothing to do with one another. One can love another and not have sex, and someone can have sex with another and not love them. People get these two confused often it seems these days. nothing to do with each other? if i tried i could not disagree more with this statement. while it is true they do not necessarily rely on each other, they can and do hold an important role when teamed together. i'm not sure they get them confused, but some do attach one to the other and often use one as a means to get the other, misguided as it may be. |
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what time does the orgy begin? i have other things to do... 1, 2, 3 o'clock 4 o'clock rock....we're gonna rock... around...the clock tonite franky, as the organizer, i feel it was your responsibility to have posted the schedule. now i have some rearranging to do. |
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maybe you would be interested in this: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/evil-deeds/201111/what-motivates-sexual-promiscuity Great article showing both sides of the argument. This part stood out: Although both aspects of Eros, sex and love are not the same thing, and, indeed, sex can sometimes unconsciously be engaged in to defend against love and intimacy. Someone who has been severely wounded during childhood in the way Guggenheim reportedly was would typically avoid situations in which they could be rejected and abandoned again. That becomes their primary motivation: the frantic avoidance of abandonment, even if that means engaging in ultimately self-destructive, superficial, sometimes abusive sexual relationships with emotionally unavailable partners. This one as well: The question of whether Peggy Guggenheim engaged in promiscuous sexuality to avoid inner feelings of emptiness, anxiety and loss is very much to the point: Could that have been the reason she frantically flitted from bed to bed? Because of exactly what you cite May as saying: That in a purely sexual (i.e., merely physically intimate) relationship, "it is only a matter of time before the partners experience feelings of emptiness." This is exactly what sexual (or any) addiction is all about. The initial "high" from sex, from orgasm, from infatuation, from novelty, from romance rapidly fades away. And then the sex addict searches for that next "fix." That new lover. That next conquest or opportunity to "get off." Over and over and over. As with any addictive behavior, such a pattern can serve as a kind of self-medication, a way of managing or avoiding depression and anxiety, and of filling the vacuum created when feelings of sadness, grief or rage are chronically repressed. What really motivates sexually addictive or compulsive behavior? Extraordinary sex drive? I would disagree. It is more likely the same thing that primarily motivates any addictive behavior: Avoidance of anxiety, anger, grief or pain. Or, perhaps in this case, loneliness. That too can be a powerful motivation: avoidance. As Freud well understood. Sometimes even more motivating than the pleasure of sating one's sexual appetite and releasing sexual tension. These are very good articles Audrey!...Might be a good place for me to add a "real" life experience about a young teen I know (and love )...She is quite pretty, a straight A student, and sexually promiscuous...This is her story...She was three years old when her father began sexually molesting her...She was five when it was discovered as a result of her "acting out" sexually in kindergarden...Her promiscuity was explained to me this way....Because the incest began at such a young age she associates sexual arousal with love...I still cry and I still get angry when I am reminded of the psychological damage she will always suffer....So yes, there are many reason for promiscuous behavior and abuse is one of them...And can I just say I am really enjoying your thread young lady!... All this unfortunate glorification leads me to think of children going through puberty, teens, young adults and even adults advocating despicable novels such as the 50 Shades of Grey series. Romanticizing this behavior and actually celebrating it as the norm. To quote E.L. James when asked to sum up her books: "people fall in love and they have sex." Even the title is summarizing Christian Grey's messed up childhood explaining what kind of man he grew into. Being "50 shades of messed up" direct quote from the book. 
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Here's a question I pose for you all: Do you believe men and women who are promiscuous (go with lust and not feelings when they sleep around) have abandonment issues from their parents? Promiscuous is subjective. For one person having two lovers in your life could be considered promiscuous. Would that person have abandonment issues? I would think intent would be what would determine the reason for the sex. Are they feeding an emptiness or do they just really like it? |
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But if you really do enjoy the dominance/sub type way of living who should be judging it as messed up? If those involved are consenting and of age to consent it is then their journey....
I say stay out of others sex lives and judge your own by your own morality which is your individual morality and should be used on others. Right? |
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Big, little, short or tall.. wished I could have kept them all... ummm I loved em every one...
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For some it's a need to be loved and love equals sex. And unfortunately for them in that way of thinking, love and sex have absolutely nothing to do with one another. One can love another and not have sex, and someone can have sex with another and not love them. People get these two confused often it seems these days. nothing to do with each other? if i tried i could not disagree more with this statement. while it is true they do not necessarily rely on each other, they can and do hold an important role when teamed together. i'm not sure they get them confused, but some do attach one to the other and often use one as a means to get the other, misguided as it may be. I mean yeah it's a great way to share that love with your partner. But for the love in itself it has no connection to the sex. The sex won't make you fall in love, nor make the other fall in love. Nor make the love stronger. It potentially makes the relationship strong through sharing the love that already exists through the sex. But again the sex in itself doesn't cause, make, or anything specific with the love in itself. |
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What is the point of arguing about promiscuity if the ones arguing haven't agreed as to what the definition of "promiscuous" is?
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What is the point of arguing about promiscuity if the ones arguing haven't agreed as to what the definition of "promiscuous" is? Promiscuous - Having casual sexual relations frequently with different partners; indiscriminate in the choice of sexual partners So basically, sluts or whores. Both male and female.. |
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Edited by
sweetestgirl11
on
Wed 06/04/14 06:25 PM
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But if you really do enjoy the dominance/sub type way of living who should be judging it as messed up? If those involved are consenting and of age to consent it is then their journey.... I say stay out of others sex lives and judge your own by your own morality which is your individual morality and should be used on others. Right? I agree with you on this, but with one item of caution....do not expect a man or woman who has refrained from promiscuity to be interested in you down the road if you are promiscuous (not you, Willow - just "you" in general) and I say this TBH more to the men because society has accepted, historically, male promiscuity. But that is changing. Quality female partners are just as likely to reject promiscuous men these days. I think often promiscuous people tend to be looking for that knight or knightess (if you will) to rescue them from the mayhem and provide stability, but that is mostly a fairy tale. Partners usually seek others with similar past behavior (despite the fairy tales) |
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