Topic: DOES IT MATTER TO YOU
Ladywind7's photo
Fri 09/25/15 11:57 PM

chronicliar75's photo
Sat 09/26/15 12:31 AM

NO MATTER WHAT ~ Boyzone

No matter what they tell us
No matter what they do
No matter what they teach us
What we believe is true

No matter what they call us
However they attack
No matter where they take us
We'll find our own way back

:heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:


My Question is...

Does it matter to you what others think of you?
Or you just shrug it off your shoulders?

DISCUSS




It always matters to me.

Why else would I
take time to write long posts
if I dont.

It is the degree of how much it matters to me,
because it is different in each person I interact.

It matters very much if I respect that person.
It matters very much if I hate disappointing that person.
It matters very much if I want an approval of that person.
I always do my best to make it right,
not for that person-
but selfishly for myself :)

It matters if I like the person,
it challenges me at a certain point.
What matters more is his/ her acceptance
after he/she sees both bad & good in me.
I do not like to change myself for others.
I certainly would like to improve myself though.

It even matters if I do not like the person,
Part of me, makes me want to let them think the worst of me.
Part of me, is always curious of their perspective & motive.
I do not mind at all if he/she cant accept me.
Part of me is even thankful & relieved that he/she cant accept
my being me:)









isaac_dede's photo
Sat 09/26/15 01:09 AM
Edited by isaac_dede on Sat 09/26/15 01:11 AM
I used to care a lot more of what others thought of me,

if they didn't want to hang out with me, I'd wonder why, what's wrong with me, what am I doing wrong, what could I do right...etc..etc..I'd drive myself nuts over it.

but honestly I think all I was doing was trying to validate myself through others...seeking external validation constantly in order to 'prove' to myself that I was valuable.


now I've done a 180, Im proud of what I've accomplished, and where I've been able to go in life....I'm still hoping to get places, but now I know I can trust myself enough to make it there...even if it takes some time.

in short, now I find validation in myself, so other people's opinions are just that, opinions, they're entitled to them, I'll listen, and I'll try to learn something from them (I believe EVERYONE has something they can teach me) if during that process I learn they can't stand me, thats fine...their prerogative. but Hopefully by that point I've gleaned enough insight into who they are that I understand, and if I don't, hopefully I learned at least one thing from them.

so in a nutshell it depends, If I respect the person it may matter...for a short while...

if I don't respect them, then I don't really respect their opinions either

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 01:46 AM

If I answer, "no" then why am I here ? I believe the majority of real people here are seeking approval in one form or another.As others have said it depends on who is giving the opinion and also on the importance of the matter under consideration.The most important thing is to remain true to your own values and beliefs.However,my values and beliefs should also be subject to scrutiny.If people disagree with me on trivial matters then it doesn't bother me.Then again we might argue over what is trivial and what is important. :wink:


flowers

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 02:18 AM


It always matters to me.

Why else would I
take time to write long posts
if I dont.

It is the degree of how much it matters to me,
because it is different in each person I interact.

It matters very much if I respect that person.
It matters very much if I hate disappointing that person.
It matters very much if I want an approval of that person.
I always do my best to make it right,
not for that person-
but selfishly for myself :)

It matters if I like the person,
it challenges me at a certain point.
What matters more is his/ her acceptance
after he/she sees both bad & good in me.
I do not like to change myself for others.
I certainly would like to improve myself though.

It even matters if I do not like the person,
Part of me, makes me want to let them think the worst of me.
Part of me, is always curious of their perspective & motive.
I do not mind at all if he/she cant accept me.
Part of me is even thankful & relieved that he/she cant accept
my being me:)




PERFECT

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 02:19 AM

I used to care a lot more of what others thought of me,

if they didn't want to hang out with me, I'd wonder why, what's wrong with me, what am I doing wrong, what could I do right...etc..etc..I'd drive myself nuts over it.

but honestly I think all I was doing was trying to validate myself through others...seeking external validation constantly in order to 'prove' to myself that I was valuable.


now I've done a 180, Im proud of what I've accomplished, and where I've been able to go in life....I'm still hoping to get places, but now I know I can trust myself enough to make it there...even if it takes some time.

in short, now I find validation in myself, so other people's opinions are just that, opinions, they're entitled to them, I'll listen, and I'll try to learn something from them (I believe EVERYONE has something they can teach me) if during that process I learn they can't stand me, thats fine...their prerogative. but Hopefully by that point I've gleaned enough insight into who they are that I understand, and if I don't, hopefully I learned at least one thing from them.

so in a nutshell it depends, If I respect the person it may matter...for a short while...

if I don't respect them, then I don't really respect their opinions either


i think i can almost 100% relate to this Isaac... ditto !!!

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 02:20 AM




:heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:

TxsGal3333's photo
Sat 09/26/15 02:39 AM
Sure at times it does then at times it does not..

When it does it would be if it was from those that are family or dear friends. For I would never intentionally say anything about anyone that I will not say to their face.

And then there are times I tend to just brush it off when I hear someone has said something about me that truly does not know me. And they are out to spread false rumors..

To me those are the ones that have too much time on their hands and always out to stir something up.. I'm a pretty open person, and if someone came right out and asked me if I said something I have no problem telling them what was said and why..

But at times it does amaze me when I hear someone is talking about me.. To me it is a sign that person must be intimidated by me. For what reason I have no clue.. Specially when they really have no reason to be. I think many times those that start rumors only do it cause they are trying to make themselves look good to someone else. Or maybe they feel if they start rumors about others then the attention goes there instead of the one spreading the rumors.. But most of the time sooner or later others see the true person behind the rumors..

For those that spread false rumors sooner or later they will do it to the ones they are gossiping too... So those I do brush off and sit back and wait for Karma to turn the tables on them...whoa


no photo
Sat 09/26/15 05:33 AM

NO MATTER WHAT ~ Boyzone

No matter what they tell us
No matter what they do
No matter what they teach us
What we believe is true

No matter what they call us
However they attack
No matter where they take us
We'll find our own way back

:heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:


My Question is...

Does it matter to you what others think of you?

Or you just shrug it off your shoulders?

DISCUSS



Jaan Doh 's photo
Sat 09/26/15 06:02 AM
I like and agree what DatWasntMe wrote

dont bother me
would i like every one to like me yes
but if they dont that is up to them
do things sometimes people say get to me , yes i am human and have feelings
but 99 % of the time i just dont care lol
<shrug>



I also agree with with what MissTina2 wrote

flowerforyou no because some people are fools as long as i know the truth and those true to me know flowerforyou



And with Msharmony wrote

yes it matters, in terms of character, amongst those with good character

doesn't matter so much what those of little or poor character think

but

it matters to me how I touch others lives which undoubtedly then affects what they think of me and

it matters to me how I 'represent' my faith, and my family when I am in public

an honest and kind reputation is important to me,,,,



I also like and agree with what Chroniciliar Wrote

It always matters to me.

Why else would I
take time to write long posts
if I dont.

It is the degree of how much it matters to me,
because it is different in each person I interact.

It matters very much if I respect that person.
It matters very much if I hate disappointing that person.
It matters very much if I want an approval of that person.
I always do my best to make it right,
not for that person-
but selfishly for myself :)

It matters if I like the person,
it challenges me at a certain point.
What matters more is his/ her acceptance
after he/she sees both bad & good in me.
I do not like to change myself for others.
I certainly would like to improve myself though.

It even matters if I do not like the person,
Part of me, makes me want to let them think the worst of me.
Part of me, is always curious of their perspective & motive.
I do not mind at all if he/she cant accept me.
Part of me is even thankful & relieved that he/she cant accept
my being me:)



So to kind of wrap it in a nutshell,

YES - I care what others think or say about me,
Especially if it is someone I am fond of of think highly off

NO - I could not give give a flying monkey what someone thinks or say about me,
Especially if it is somone who has rub me up the wrong way,
or someone who I dont respect as much as I normally respect the majority of people.

RESPECT - Although given freely, does have to be earned to some lesser degree,
Lesser degree because you could respect someone simply from the way they write their thoughts and feelings/emotions,
Most times I like to love and respect those who treat me how they would like to treated themselves.


TMommy's photo
Sat 09/26/15 06:11 AM
Edited by TMommy on Sat 09/26/15 06:13 AM

NO MATTER WHAT ~ Boyzone

No matter what they tell us
No matter what they do
No matter what they teach us
What we believe is true

No matter what they call us
However they attack
No matter where they take us
We'll find our own way back

:heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:


My Question is...

Does it matter to you what others think of you?

Or you just shrug it off your shoulders?

DISCUSS




not really
some will get my humor
others will just get irritated
some will understand the serious side of me
others will just get confused

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 06:13 AM
I'd like to think that I leave mostly smiles, and not anger, in my wake. However, do I lie awake at night wondering if so and so likes me? No....

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 06:22 AM

Sure at times it does then at times it does not..

When it does it would be if it was from those that are family or dear friends. For I would never intentionally say anything about anyone that I will not say to their face.

And then there are times I tend to just brush it off when I hear someone has said something about me that truly does not know me. And they are out to spread false rumors..

To me those are the ones that have too much time on their hands and always out to stir something up.. I'm a pretty open person, and if someone came right out and asked me if I said something I have no problem telling them what was said and why..

But at times it does amaze me when I hear someone is talking about me.. To me it is a sign that person must be intimidated by me. For what reason I have no clue.. Specially when they really have no reason to be. I think many times those that start rumors only do it cause they are trying to make themselves look good to someone else. Or maybe they feel if they start rumors about others then the attention goes there instead of the one spreading the rumors.. But most of the time sooner or later others see the true person behind the rumors..

For those that spread false rumors sooner or later they will do it to the ones they are gossiping too... So those I do brush off and sit back and wait for Karma to turn the tables on them...whoa




i enjoyed reading this, tnx Kristi

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 06:24 AM


So to kind of wrap it in a nutshell,

YES - I care what others think or say about me,
Especially if it is someone I am fond of of think highly off

NO - I could not give give a flying monkey what someone thinks or say about me,
Especially if it is somone who has rub me up the wrong way,
or someone who I dont respect as much as I normally respect the majority of people.

RESPECT - Although given freely, does have to be earned to some lesser degree,
Lesser degree because you could respect someone simply from the way they write their thoughts and feelings/emotions,
Most times I like to love and respect those who treat me how they would like to treated themselves.



Very nice Jaan
Assalamu'alaikum

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 06:25 AM


not really
some will get my humor
others will just get irritated
some will understand the serious side of me
others will just get confused



:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

no photo
Sat 09/26/15 07:34 AM
What others think of me matters only depending on the source and what type of criticisms.People may think about us negatively to destroy us or positively to build us up. Some people are hurtful, malicious, jealous, vindictive, have nothing to do better in their lives but mind other's business, while others are truly honest , caring and concerned of your welfare that they want to let you know because they want to help you. There are two types of criticisms, Constructive and Destructive . Constructive criticisms are useful feedbacks or opinions both negative and positive that can help yourself improve. While, Destructive criticisms are thoughtless feedbacks or opinions that can hurt one's pride, destroy prestige, reputation, sel-esteem and confidence which often leads to stress, anger or aggression. Wherever we go or in whatever we do, people will always have something to say about each other. So, whatever you think of me, I will always try to keep my mind open, with self control and more understanding, may it be negative or positive, I will appreciate it to recognize or acknowledge my mistakes or weaknesses and try to improve, work on it and become a more better and able person with great self esteem and confidence. I ignore comments that are of totally no value , but some negative feedbacks are not at all bad if you take it in a positve way and make it a challenge to yourself to prove them wrong and show them the best that you can be.

MelMaxx's photo
Sat 09/26/15 07:45 AM
I tend to bend towards what everyone else has already said...basically, if I like the person then yes, I care very deeply what they think of me. If I don't like the person or I know the person is being beligerant or close minded then hell no, I don't care what they think of me.
Yes, I TRY to be kind and leave a good impression, but it doesn't really "worry" me.

(I always want my secret crush to like me :wink: laugh flowerforyou )

no photo
Tue 09/29/15 12:11 AM

What others think of me matters only depending on the source and what type of criticisms.People may think about us negatively to destroy us or positively to build us up. Some people are hurtful, malicious, jealous, vindictive, have nothing to do better in their lives but mind other's business, while others are truly honest , caring and concerned of your welfare that they want to let you know because they want to help you. There are two types of criticisms, Constructive and Destructive . Constructive criticisms are useful feedbacks or opinions both negative and positive that can help yourself improve. While, Destructive criticisms are thoughtless feedbacks or opinions that can hurt one's pride, destroy prestige, reputation, sel-esteem and confidence which often leads to stress, anger or aggression. Wherever we go or in whatever we do, people will always have something to say about each other. So, whatever you think of me, I will always try to keep my mind open, with self control and more understanding, may it be negative or positive, I will appreciate it to recognize or acknowledge my mistakes or weaknesses and try to improve, work on it and become a more better and able person with great self esteem and confidence. I ignore comments that are of totally no value , but some negative feedbacks are not at all bad if you take it in a positve way and make it a challenge to yourself to prove them wrong and show them the best that you can be.


nice...flowerforyou

no photo
Tue 09/29/15 12:12 AM

(I always want my secret crush to like me)


hehehe
:wink: :wink: :wink:

Dodo_David's photo
Tue 09/29/15 04:36 AM

(I always want my secret crush to like me :wink: laugh flowerforyou )


huh