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Topic: If your gf will cheat on you, will you give her the second c
Xaynah's photo
Fri 05/27/16 10:36 PM
What if your gf is having an affair with any other person or had intimate relationship.. and if she confesses and is guilty, will you forgive her?

mightymoe's photo
Fri 05/27/16 10:39 PM

What if your gf is having an affair with any other person or had intimate relationship.. and if she confesses and is guilty, will you forgive her?


no...

PacificStar48's photo
Fri 05/27/16 10:41 PM
I don't do girlfriends but I would not tolerate anyone cheating on me. I have more self respect than that.

no photo
Fri 05/27/16 10:42 PM
Edited by unknown_romeo on Fri 05/27/16 10:43 PM

What if your gf is having an affair with any other person or had intimate relationship.. and if she confesses and is guilty, will you forgive her?


No. I can't stand cheaters but if she was honest enough(which most women aren't) i will simply wish her good luck & be out of her life. You don't know the pain of being cheated on i would not even wish that upon my enemy...altho i don't have any enemies drinks


no photo
Fri 05/27/16 10:44 PM
I seriously do not understand why people cheat. Why get into a relationship if you have fkd up morals why??

Kathyzee's photo
Fri 05/27/16 10:45 PM
Ya sure why not.
But only if I could watch the next time it happens again :wink: rofl
Not....rofl

Robxbox73's photo
Fri 05/27/16 10:57 PM
About as much forgiveness, as a woman scorned!!! That means no, mY dear...

Newuwood's photo
Sat 05/28/16 01:35 AM
now thats a good question...forgiveness is given with a change of heart...if u see the same steps and character then theres your warning sign...but yes u can forgive and forget...its up to that person if they will let u remember.

Duttoneer's photo
Sat 05/28/16 01:43 AM

If she was a recent girlfriend probably not, because I would feel this happening so early on in the relationship would mean it will just happen again, and someone who does that is not worth the risk long term. In a more long standing relationship, I would try and forgive by understanding why it happened, but I would be so devastated that forgiveness may not be enough for our relationship to survive. Until something like that actually happens, you don't really know what you would do and what the outcome would be, this is just my opinion.

peggy122's photo
Sat 05/28/16 04:03 AM
Edited by peggy122 on Sat 05/28/16 04:18 AM
I agree with Duttoneer. Since I am looking for someone who demonstrates the qualities of being a compatible life partner down the road, I probably would not give a boyfriend who cheats a second chance. If they dont have the self control to remain faithful for 4 or less years , then they are not likely to remain faithful over a lifetime.

However, when it comes to marriage, I am not quick to abandon my vows .

I would really have to go through a period of separation and some couple's counseling to assess FOR MYSELF what is the attitude of my mate to their infidelity.

The people who are prone to cheating REPEATEDLY in my opinion, have a few common traits, and if I identify those traits , I don't think I would want to give them another chance.The traits are:-

1. They justify their cheating by listing their partner's inadequacies, that 'forced' them into the arms of another

2. They are arrogant and insensitive in their attitude, insisting that their apology is enough , and that their mate is unreasonable for being weepy or angry about the infidelity, or even mentioning the infidelity after the apology

3. Even after the cheating incident , they refuse to conform to a lifestyle of transparency, eg indicating their whereabouts,socialising with members of the opposite sex only in public settings, giving up their passwords for their social media, their phone etc. , and deactivating from all dating sites.

I don't look merely at apologies people offer after their wrong doing. I look for a change of attitude , actions/lifestyle.

Any mate displaying the 3 traits that I mentioned above, does not give me any hope that they will change their behavior in the longterm, and if that is the case, it is wiser for us to part ways.


zionnite007's photo
Sat 05/28/16 05:59 AM
well everyone of us here have different opion about cheeting but first some time we give our gf or bf the option to do so

Goofball73's photo
Sat 05/28/16 07:05 AM

What if your gf is having an affair with any other person or had intimate relationship.. and if she confesses and is guilty, will you forgive her?


Eh. I'll go have a pint at the pub, talk to my bartender/psychiatrist about the issue, drive while drunk, get pulled over and arrested, sit in jail until the cheating whore bails me out, then have make up sex with said cheating whore, wake up the next morning and attend temple, cleanse the soul and all and then go to work on Monday and act as if nothing ever happened. Life is all about perspective. drinker

mightymoe's photo
Sat 05/28/16 07:08 AM
Edited by mightymoe on Sat 05/28/16 07:09 AM

well everyone of us here have different opion about cheeting but first some time we give our gf or bf the option to do so


what, are going to keep her chained up? please explain just how you don't give her an option to cheat...

RustyKitty's photo
Sat 05/28/16 07:12 AM
i don't do girls either.. but if a man cheated on me.. he's already made his decision.. there is NO second chance..

IgorFrankensteen's photo
Sat 05/28/16 07:32 AM
Forgiveness again.

The thing is, it took me a long time to work it out, but I finally realized that people CAN'T just decide to truly forgive someone.

You can say the words, and you can try to deal with your emotions about whatever it is by yourself, but real forgiveness only happens when a person understands and agrees with(on some level) the person who upset them.

It's fairly easy for most of us to forgive small children, because we've been there, and made the same mistakes ourselves, and we know why they messed up.

But when it comes to infidelity, unless we've done it ourselves, and have thoroughly worked out why, and adjusted our own vision of life to include it as okay, we CAN'T forgive it in someone else.

Most people who try to "forgive" a straying mate, never really do. Most of them have crippled relationships if they try to stay together, and often suffering either ongoing resentment, or severe loss of self esteem.

Short answer, I learned the hard way, as many do. No.

no photo
Sat 05/28/16 09:28 AM
If your gf will cheat on you, will you give her the second c

Like the hep-c?

What if your gf is having an affair with any other person or had intimate relationship.. and if she confesses and is guilty, will you forgive her?

No.
No such thing as "forgive."
"Forgive" is a religious concept, not a rational one.

All information is change.
Once you have information you change.
The more traumatic the information the more you change.
"Forgive" implies you can keep from changing, you can go back to a reality/image/paradigm that doesn't exist by letting something go.

So, no.
I can't "forgive" cheating.

I can determine what is relevant and what I am willing to take responsibility for and what I'm willing to do about it, though.

I will respond very differently between:
"Ha ha! I cheated on you with the dog because you have a tiny penis and smell worse than he does!"
vs.
"Ever since the miscarriage I've been drinking more often, too much stress, just can't handle it, got too scared and living in my own head, and one night got drunk at work and banged some guy in accounting, I need help, I don't know what to do."
vs.
"I've been talking to Roger for 3 years on the internet, I told you I was visiting my sister's but instead I met him at a hotel and we had sex for the 3 days, and broke up with him. I'm never leaving you, but I like building up these fake relationships, banging them at their highest point, and then dumping them before they fall apart. It's more fun than needlepoint."


Annierooroo's photo
Sat 05/28/16 09:42 AM
Edited by Annierooroo on Sat 05/28/16 09:43 AM
My advice for anyone including myself

Hell no, don't be a dumb ***.(donkey).

mightymoe's photo
Sat 05/28/16 09:49 AM

My advice for anyone including myself

Hell no, don't be a dumb ***.(donkey).

a dumb donkey? ... is that like a monkey without a hat?

adivorcedone's photo
Sat 05/28/16 09:49 AM
cheating is never good for anyone.....I dont care how great you are...in and out of bed.....you will be history, as far as I am concerned, if found out....and you will be.....

Annierooroo's photo
Sat 05/28/16 09:55 AM


My advice for anyone including myself

Hell no, don't be a dumb ***.(donkey).

a dumb donkey? ... is that like a monkey without a hat?

The word I was using isn't allowed so I was using the other name in brackets so you call see it wasn't a swear word lol.

Arse?
I spelt different above to check if it will do it
Your examples could work lol

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