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| Topic: detachment | |
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when would it be right time to get close and when to just detach in this world of cyber chat ? would there be like a gauge to know?
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I don't get your question.
You mean to ask 2 questions, being: 1 When is it time to get close 2 When is it time to detach from the internet Or: When is it time to take the budding relationship to the next level and continue outside of dating sites/chat? OR: When is it time when you're in a new relationship to stop participating on dating sites? I don't get it... |
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I don't get your question. You mean to ask 2 questions, being: 1 When is it time to get close 2 When is it time to detach from the internet Or: When is it time to take the budding relationship to the next level and continue outside of dating sites/chat? OR: When is it time when you're in a new relationship to stop participating on dating sites? I don't get it... hello Crystal  it is a question of when to get closer or just detach from someone youve met in cyberspace ... would one week suffice to be a reason to go on with knowing each other and not chatting for 3 days suffice for detaching already from the person
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i know im confusing myself too lol
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It's cyberspace for God's sake. Not a marriage contract. Not getting
an e mail for a couple of days is no big deal. If you enjoy chatting with someone then chat. If you don't then don't. If they don't like chatting with you they won't. |
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It's cyberspace for God's sake. Not a marriage contract. Not getting an e mail for a couple of days is no big deal. If you enjoy chatting with someone then chat. If you don't then don't. If they don't like chatting with you they won't. This. It's the holiday season. Might not be the best time to worry about a potential online romance. |
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would there be like a gauge to know? No. There's no gauge or easy way. You have to make an adult decision, deal with, and accept the consequences in case you're wrong, and realize it doesn't really matter if you're right. |
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ok the men have spoken
 summing it all up and note to self : do not over analyze and just be happy whatever/however it goes 
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Well, I like to add to that.
It depends largely on HOW the conversations went. If it is good, not remaining too superficial and feels like it is progressing, yes, get closer. Well, you automatically would in such a scenario. Not hearing from him for 3 days... again depends on how the conversations went. Did it get awkward, a bit difficult to keep conversation going? Then probably best to withdraw and move on. You could always send one more message and that message should be a statement. NOT, never ever a question, nothing that would demand a reply, nothing that says you're needy and/or waiting to hear from him. So you never ask something like "Are you okay? Hope to hear from you!" That's needy. You do not want to be needy. Just a statement (meaning: not a question that would require his reply) that is either a bit playful, a bit flirty or simply funny. Or funny with a hint of sexy. If he then doesn't reply, move on. Then he's not interested. |
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Edited by
SimpyComplicated
on
Thu 12/22/16 04:52 PM
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ok the men have spoken summing it all up and note to self : do not over analyze and just be happy whatever/however it goes Actually I think it is more you are under analysing it and trying to jump to conclusion too soon. As to attachment. My understanding of what constitutes attachment is that you feel another is part of yourself. I also believe it is possible that at a cosmic level we are all a part of a greater entity. Having said that I believe it is up to us to decide to what degree we attach ourselves to an other individual. So good analyses is good in helping come to a conclusion. Of course every conclusion leads to more analyses and more conclusions Well that's what I conclude.  PS Learn to be happy analysing and concluding |
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There is no set time. It's personally preference and gut feeling
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Well, I like to add to that. It depends largely on HOW the conversations went. If it is good, not remaining too superficial and feels like it is progressing, yes, get closer. Well, you automatically would in such a scenario. Not hearing from him for 3 days... again depends on how the conversations went. Did it get awkward, a bit difficult to keep conversation going? Then probably best to withdraw and move on. You could always send one more message and that message should be a statement. NOT, never ever a question, nothing that would demand a reply, nothing that says you're needy and/or waiting to hear from him. So you never ask something like "Are you okay? Hope to hear from you!" That's needy. You do not want to be needy. Just a statement (meaning: not a question that would require his reply) that is either a bit playful, a bit flirty or simply funny. Or funny with a hint of sexy. If he then doesn't reply, move on. Then he's not interested.  as always good advice there dear
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Edited by
NotPay4Play
on
Thu 12/22/16 07:52 PM
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Let's see. I would say if you haven't heard from the gal / guy for 365 days 12 hours 37 and a half minutes then maybe you've forgotten what you've talked about.
 Just use your best judgment. Good luck. |
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Edited by
GentleS0ul
on
Thu 12/22/16 08:22 PM
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I was totally unaware of some things...
So if you haven't heard from someone and ask if the person is OK it might be perceived as needy? How about concerned? Are you doing fine? How are you? What's going on? If someone gets the message totally wrong way and acts upon it because they simply didn't get it, didn't realize they are dealing with a real person who simply puts it as it is, well... I say good bye. Hey, there is no need to reply. If there is no communication, there is nothing.I am not a mind reader. I do not need anyone to report every move to me, nor would I consider doing it, but if someone truly cares...well, they do not serve anyone with an excuse, they find a time and a way to keep in touch. If not, they avoid taking a stand, making a statement, keeping in touch and who cares where they were and why they didn't text or call. In that case there is a delete contact option. Hey nobody is the only one out there. Everyone can move on and find someone else. : -) Just my 5 cents. |
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I was totally unaware of some things... So if you haven't heard from someone and ask if the person is OK it might be perceived as needy? How about concerned? Are you doing fine? How are you? What's going on? If someone gets the message totally wrong way and acts upon it because they simply didn't get it, didn't realize they are dealing with a real person who simply puts it as it is, well... I say good bye. Hey, there is no need to reply. If there is no communication, there is nothing.I am not a mind reader. I do not need anyone to report every move to me, nor would I consider doing it, but if someone truly cares...well, they do not serve anyone with an excuse, they find a time and a way to keep in touch. If not, they avoid taking a stand, making a statement, keeping in touch and who cares where they were and why they didn't text or call. In that case there is a delete contact option. Hey nobody is the only one out there. Everyone can move on and find someone else. : -) Just my 5 cents. Yes... life goes on
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Edited by
howed
on
Fri 12/23/16 12:24 AM
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I don't get your question. You mean to ask 2 questions, being: 1 When is it time to get close 2 When is it time to detach from the internet Or: When is it time to take the budding relationship to the next level and continue outside of dating sites/chat? OR: When is it time when you're in a new relationship to stop participating on dating sites? I don't get it... hello Crystal it is a question of when to get closer or just detach from someone youve met in cyberspace ... would one week suffice to be a reason to go on with knowing each other and not chatting for 3 days suffice for detaching already from the person Sounds like your already headed to the exit door. To draw close to one another over cyber space is very difficult.Understanding each other in this method of communications will take months to develop a close caring and loving relationship with each other. Do not give up so easily, it really is work take it on as a challenge! good luck |
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