Previous 1 3
Topic: A Vacation From Your Partner?
peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 08:41 AM
Edited by peggy122 on Mon 02/20/17 09:29 AM
In the movie "Sex & The City 2" ,.the idea of needing space from one's mate is addressed.

How would you feel if your mate wanted to go on an annual vacation by his/her self? Not for work or with friends. Just.by his/herself

Would it make you feel insecure about the relationship?

Or is it something you have secretly wished for yourself, but were afraid to ask?

Let me add that the condition that the mate vacations with you at other times in the year, but does maybe a weekend getaway by his /herself annually.


TMommy's photo
Mon 02/20/17 08:43 AM
hahaaa..ya know my sister in law used to pull that one over on my brother

said she needed some 'me' time

used to go down to Florida with her mother

leave the kids and hubby at home




ya they're divorced now

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 08:54 AM
Edited by peggy122 on Mon 02/20/17 08:57 AM

hahaaa..ya know my sister in law used to pull that one over on my brother

said she needed some 'me' time

used to go down to Florida with her mother

leave the kids and hubby at home




ya they're divorced now


Hi Tmom waving

I know many divorced or broken up couples and most of them never took vacations apart from each other.

I cant say if any corelation can be made between the two . Lol

soufiehere's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:01 AM
Never done that, prolly never will.
My relationships are always built on
'together' time.

Now my mate likes to go home to visit,
(Texas) he went last year, and as I canna
fly he goes alone..but tis pretty much
torture for both of us :-)

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:15 AM
Edited by peggy122 on Mon 02/20/17 09:13 AM

girls nite out, yes.

full blown vacation on my own. wha?

idunno what the momcation thing was tho.



Well some single people go on vacation without friends sometimes klc just to decompress and reflect. Maybe some may still want that "me " time even after becoming an us??? Depends on the person's temperament I guess :)

Also bear in mind , it is possible to vacation by yourself for a weekend at one time in the year and vacation with your mate for a week at another time in the year

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:19 AM

Never done that, prolly never will.
My relationships are always built on
'together' time.

Now my mate likes to go home to visit,
(Texas) he went last year, and as I canna
fly he goes alone..but tis pretty much
torture for both of us :-)



Aaaawww... Thats so cute soufie. You guys seem to be an excellent match :)

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:24 AM



girls nite out, yes.

full blown vacation on my own. wha?

idunno what the momcation thing was tho.



Well some single people go on vacation without friends sometimes klc just to decompress and reflect. Maybe some may still want that "me " time even after becoming an us??? Depends on the person's temperament I guess :)

Also bear in mind , it is possible to vacation by yourself for a weekend at one time in the year and vacation with your mate for a week at another time in the year
yep. I was just giving my reaction to the idea.


I totally understand. I suspect it would freak a lot of people out lol.

I guess it would depend also on the history of the couple and the present condition of the relationship.

If my mate cheated on me in the past or if our relationship was presently rocky ,.and he announced a weekend getaway at that poiñt, I could see potential for massive speculation or panic

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:30 AM

Ha! What partner?


Maybe a partner who has a highly stressful life,.and needs quiet time? Different strokes for different folks?lol

Aries2500's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:33 AM
Ha! What partner?

soufiehere's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:40 AM

Aaaawww... Thats so cute soufie. You guys seem to be an excellent match :)

Like a house on fire :-)
It can happen to YOU!

no photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:42 AM
Bonsoir comment tu vas tu as bien

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:47 AM
Edited by SparklingCrystal 💖💎 on Mon 02/20/17 09:49 AM

In the movie "Sex & The City 2" ,.the idea of needing space from one's mate is addressed.

How would you feel if your mate wanted to go on an annual vacation by his/her self? Not for work or with friends. Just.by his/herself

Would it make you feel insecure about the relationship?

Or is it something you have secretly wished for yourself, but were afraid to ask?

Let me add that the condition that the mate vacations with you at other times in the year, but does maybe a weekend getaway by his /herself annually.



That's the kind of relationship I want. And with the man in my life, I could see that happen too. What's wrong with it? Nothing.
He likes a few things I have no interest in, so I cannot share that with him, I'd likely only spoil it for him. Why would I want to spoil something for a partner when I love him?
I don't own a partner.
I can see myself going to Glastonbury (UK) on my own at some point in time. Now if my partner happened to take an interest in that, I'd love for him to come with me. Otherwise I'd go on my own.

Loving each other doesn't mean you got to be glued together or joint at the hip. That's needy, clingy, smothering. If both need that sort of thing, fair enough. If both need some personal freedom and/or the space to enjoy what they love doing, it should be possible to do that.
And no, that does not extend to the local strip club or something.

I wouldn't like it if it was more than a week. And also wouldn't be happy if we never went on holiday together. There's gotta be a balance.

Friend of mine used to stay home with the 2 youngest, her hubby would go on holiday with their eldest. They both liked cycling & camping. They buggered off for 2 weeks sometimes. What's wrong with that? Nothing at all.
And they're still happily married btw.

In a healthy relationship you (can) give each other space when it's needed. Most ppl think and behave as if the other is their property, just because they're in a relationship. I think that's relationship killer No1.
.
.

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:48 AM


Aaaawww... Thats so cute soufie. You guys seem to be an excellent match :)

Like a house on fire :-)
It can happen to YOU!


Throw some gasoline in there for me soufie. Im waiting patiently happy

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 09:54 AM

Bonsoir comment tu vas tu as bien


Comment ca va jeanhorn57? waving

no1phD's photo
Mon 02/20/17 10:03 AM
Hmm I get the need for alone time
But having to get far away from me.
Ummm..go have fun...I will do the same...lol...look out Vegas here I come..lol

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 10:03 AM

sure thing.

My boyfriend goes on bike tours (if thats what you call em). And I spose its sort of a vacation. I dont go. Its something that keeps him in shape, and he likes the accomplishment of it. I have no problem with it. We communicate a lot while we're apart.

If I felt distrust for him I would break up with him rather than deny him a vacation I reckon.

Personally, I get alone time at home.


Yeah. Trust is a huuuuuuuge dealbreaker here and you made a good point about communication. Remaining in contact while apart is key even if its just a couple of texts a day. Everyone likes the reassurance that they are being thought of even while apart.

But while you get alone time at home, there are some who feel burdened by the idea of chores to be done around the house or burdened by feeling an obligstion to chat with their mate when they desperately yearn for some silence

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 10:39 AM


In the movie "Sex & The City 2" ,.the idea of needing space from one's mate is addressed.

How would you feel if your mate wanted to go on an annual vacation by his/her self? Not for work or with friends. Just.by his/herself

Would it make you feel insecure about the relationship?

Or is it something you have secretly wished for yourself, but were afraid to ask?

Let me add that the condition that the mate vacations with you at other times in the year, but does maybe a weekend getaway by his /herself annually.



That's the kind of relationship I want. And with the man in my life, I could see that happen too. What's wrong with it? Nothing.
He likes a few things I have no interest in, so I cannot share that with him, I'd likely only spoil it for him. Why would I want to spoil something for a partner when I love him?
I don't own a partner.
I can see myself going to Glastonbury (UK) on my own at some point in time. Now if my partner happened to take an interest in that, I'd love for him to come with me. Otherwise I'd go on my own.

Loving each other doesn't mean you got to be glued together or joint at the hip. That's needy, clingy, smothering. If both need that sort of thing, fair enough. If both need some personal freedom and/or the space to enjoy what they love doing, it should be possible to do that.
And no, that does not extend to the local strip club or something.

I wouldn't like it if it was more than a week. And also wouldn't be happy if we never went on holiday together. There's gotta be a balance.

Friend of mine used to stay home with the 2 youngest, her hubby would go on holiday with their eldest. They both liked cycling & camping. They buggered off for 2 weeks sometimes. What's wrong with that? Nothing at all.
And they're still happily married btw.

In a healthy relationship you (can) give each other space when it's needed. Most ppl think and behave as if the other is their property, just because they're in a relationship. I think that's relationship killer No1.
.
.



I think most people need space from their partner at some point. Part of the challenge however is that one person often appears to need more than the other and it results in hurt feelings. It would really require a secure and understanding partner and a stable relationship for such a free arrangement to thrive. And you seem to have found that. Congrats crystal! flowerforyou

soufiehere's photo
Mon 02/20/17 10:41 AM

Hmm I get the need for alone time
But having to get far away from me.
Ummm..go have fun...I will do the same...lol...look out Vegas here I come..lol

The media has been alerted.
No one will turn their back to you :-)

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 10:50 AM

Hmm I get the need for alone time
But having to get far away from me.
Ummm..go have fun...I will do the same...lol...look out Vegas here I come..lol


I think when people need space, its usually not from their partner alone. They need a break from work, chores,kids, care giving responsibilities for their parents, studies or any number of things . It is not always personal.

Some individuals rather than take that breathing time, stay amidst all the stress and become very unpleasant to be around

peggy122's photo
Mon 02/20/17 10:55 AM
Edited by peggy122 on Mon 02/20/17 10:45 AM

Ah, thats why
'she shacks, or man caves' are so valuable.:wink:


Its great for those who have that luxury. I agree :)

Previous 1 3