100% FREE ONLINE DATING
sponsored links
Previous
| Topic: a friend... a lover... where's the limit? | |
|---|---|
|
Edited by
DavidKamel
on
Mon 02/05/18 02:32 PM
|
|
In conjunction to the question before about "relation & sex", and to all the opinions came in it, I would like to ask:
what is the difference between 'FRIENDSHIP' & 'RELATIONSHIP'? ##between a man and woman of course.## here's the old topic link: https://mingle2.com/topic/548497 This question is specially forwarded to those saying SEX isn't an essential part of a true relationship. What differentiates a sexless Relationship from a Friendship? If there's no difference, then they are one thing... the same thing. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Well this is similar to your last post, isnt it?
Both are relationships in the fact that you both interact with each other... Maybe your problem is English is not translating to your way of thinking in your country. Relationship is something deeper....I do hope this helps. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Well this is similar to your last post, isnt it? Both are relationships in the fact that you both interact with each other... Maybe your problem is English is not translating to your way of thinking in your country. Relationship is something deeper....I do hope this helps. that post wasn't mine... |
|
|
|
|
|
Edited by
Ness_a
on
Mon 02/05/18 03:06 PM
|
|
Relationship can be a tricky word.
While a friendship is a type of relationship, being "in a relationship" most commonly means a long term romantic type of relationship. Otherwise the word generally has a reference in front of it. If someone is having a fling, they might use the term "sexual relationship" to describe it. If someone is dating someone now and again over a period of time, they might say "off-and-on relationship". If someone is staying with a partner they don't get along with but they both enjoy their "sexual relationship" too much to wish to stop seeing one another, the term "love-hate relationship" could be used to describe it. And friends with benefits or regular booty calls might fall under "casual relationships". That should just about cover you. Happy hunting. |
|
|
|
|
|
Edited by
Toodygirl5
on
Mon 02/05/18 03:24 PM
|
|
A friendship relationship is not always sexual, even if it is a Man and Waman.
A sexual relationship can be just about sex, no real friendship. A couple who is committed to each other has sex and friendship.  |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Edited by
DavidKamel
on
Mon 02/05/18 03:38 PM
|
|
Both are relationships in the fact that you both interact with each other... Maybe your problem is English is not translating to your way of thinking in your country. Relationship is something deeper....I do hope this helps. no this doesn't help, actually... And English is my second sense.. anyway... to read what you said... notice that you have copied me when you concluded that friendship and relationship are one thing... I already have said this above.. have you read my question before you hit 'Replay'?? I said in my original post above that if a relationship doesn't have sex, then this turns it into a normal friendship. so, to say they are one thing but one is deeper doesn't help... if friendship is the same thing of relationship, then men can have sex with their female friends... you see where you are taking us? ((lol....I'm seeing many heads nodding so cheerful, now)) Also, it's not about culture differences... trying to move the topic to other field of study is hopeless and helpless... because basic instincts are universal among all species, alike is the social behavior. So, culture does nothing in this regard. Finally to your notice... any man in your culture can has many friendships with many females, BUT only one relationship with one femal... correct me if I am wrong. While, to your remind... In my culture... a man can have as many friendships with females as he like.... and ALSO as many relationships as he like... some limit it to four women (wives) only... some say it's open. Mohammad the Conquerer, just Like King David and King Somalian, has over 100 females in his harm. (call them wives, call them girlfriends.. I don't care now). Somalian is said to have over 700 females in his palace. So, if there's any cultural problem, then it is not in my culture... I (or we) know the difference... You see...?? it's not about difference between cultures... it's about the difference between the two things: Friendship & Relationship. So, what do you think??? ---------------- Anyway... here's my argument for the topic: Friendship & Relationship. I will start by a tough question forwarded to all women. If you are a woman reading this, please, answer those two questions put in black below: If friendship and relationship are one thing, do you accept your partner in your relationship to have other relationships with other women??? you know... relationship is just like friendship.. so, do you allow him to have many relationships??? I guess the answer undoubtedly NOOOOOOOOOOO WAAAAAAAAAAAY. well, why?? Because friendship is not like relationship... Now, what about the other way round??? what about friendships with other females??? Is it acceptable to you (as a woman) to know your partner has many friendships with many women???? I guess you would be consent with this... maybe tightly, but it's ok. as long as we are speaking about friendship, then it would be ok. You see the difference between your answers to these both questions???? to one question you answered with NOOOOOOOOOOO and to the other question you might answered with YES. Why??? why have your answer changed? if friendship and relationship are one thing, then why do you accept one and reject the other? Hence, I have proved to those with blurry understanding that friendships and relationships are not the same! But why? What is The Difference??? |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Both are relationships in the fact that you both interact with each other... Maybe your problem is English is not translating to your way of thinking in your country. Relationship is something deeper....I do hope this helps. no this doesn't help, actually... And English is my second sense.. anyway... to read what you said... notice that you have copied me when you concluded that friendship and relationship are one thing... I already have said this above.. have you read my question before you hit 'Replay'?? I said in my original post above that if a relationship doesn't have sex, then this turns it into a normal friendship. so, to say they are one thing but one is deeper doesn't help... if friendship is the same thing of relationship, then men can have sex with their female friends... you see where you are taking us? ((lol....I'm seeing many heads nodding so cheerful, now)) Also, it's not about culture differences... trying to move the topic to other field of study is hopeless and helpless... because basic instincts are universal among all species, alike is the social behavior. So, culture does nothing in this regard. Finally to your notice... any man in your culture can has many friendships with many females, BUT only one relationship with one femal... correct me if I am wrong. While, to your remind... In my culture... a man can have as many friendships with females as he like.... and ALSO as many relationships as he like... some limit it to four women (wives) only... some say it's open. Mohammad the Conquerer, just Like King David and King Somalian, has over 100 females in his harm. (call them wives, call them girlfriends.. I don't care now). Somalian is said to have over 700 females in his palace. So, if there's any cultural problem, then it is not in my culture... I (or we) know the difference... You see...?? it's not about difference between cultures... it's about the difference between the two things: Friendship & Relationship. So, what do you think??? ---------------- Anyway... here's my argument for the topic: Friendship & Relationship. I will start by a tough question forwarded to all women. If you are a woman reading this, please, answer those two questions put in black below: If friendship and relationship are one thing, do you accept your partner in your relationship to have other relationships with other women??? you know... relationship is just like friendship.. so, do you allow him to have many relationships??? I guess the answer undoubtedly NOOOOOOOOOOO WAAAAAAAAAAAY. well, why?? Because friendship is not like relationship... Now, what about the other way round??? what about friendships with other females??? Is it acceptable to you (as a woman) to know your partner has many friendships with many women???? I guess you would be consent with this... maybe tightly, but it's ok. as long as we are speaking about friendship, then it would be ok. You see the difference between your answers to these both questions???? to one question you answered with NOOOOOOOOOOO and to the other question you might answered with YES. Why??? why have your answer changed? if friendship and relationship are one thing, then why do you accept one and reject the other? Hence, I have proved to those with blurry understanding that friendships and relationships are not the same! But why? What is The Difference??? Like I said....cultural diffrences... |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Relationship can be a tricky word. While a friendship is a type of relationship, being "in a relationship" most commonly means a long term romantic type of relationship. Otherwise the word generally has a reference in front of it. If someone is having a fling, they might use the term "sexual relationship" to describe it. If someone is dating someone now and again over a period of time, they might say "off-and-on relationship". If someone is staying with a partner they don't get along with but they both enjoy their "sexual relationship" too much to wish to stop seeing one another, the term "love-hate relationship" could be used to describe it. And friends with benefits or regular booty calls might fall under "casual relationships". That should just about cover you. Happy hunting. I have read your answer a couple of time... and I got an important conclusion from it: between a male & a female, there's no friendship. they might be all the names you gave above: long-term relation (romantic: it includes sex) sexual-relation (fling: it includes sex) off-and-on relation (dating: it includes sex) love-hate relation (sexual relationship) casual relationship (friendship of benefits: meaning sex) What do you see in all these kind of relationsships??? they all have sex... So, none of them is considered friendship... even the last one that you mentioned, you said it is between friends, but they both have mutual benefits. but again... I want you p notice, the sex might be there without a complete intecourse... I mean, the relation might be built on sexual attraction... if this is the case, then it isn't friendship... it is another kind of incomplete relation. in Friendship, there is no sexual interest. If you are my friend, then you would be just like Jack, William, and Mehmet! got it? |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Like I said....cultural diffrences... good then... Answer this question... Do you accept it that your wife has other relationships.. say with five other men??? You know... relationship in your culture is the same as friendship, so, it would be accepted to you, then. Nothing personal... I'm just curious about men like you in your culture. Answer please! do you accept? |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
A friendship relationship is not always sexual, even if it is a Man and Waman. A sexual relationship can be just about sex, no real friendship. A couple who is committed to each other has sex and friendship. this is the best answer until now... but please, lady allow me for some editing... as a designer who scrutinizes in every detail, I can't resist put my touches on your details... I would like just to retouch the first sentence only... only the first one. A friendship relationship is not always sexual, even if it is a Man and Waman. you should have said: A friendship relationship is always none-sexual, even if it is a Man and Waman. I just replaced the 'not' with 'none'... my hat off |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I don't think my friends would let me do the things I do to a lover  though I am sure some of them could easily be persuaded . 
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
in need for coffee now... I might as well make it an Irish coffee :)
I have very closed friend and happen to be female.... we never crossed the line to act or being sexcual active as if we are in relationship... maybe somthing wrong with US 
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
In my life female 'friends' may have as many friends as they want, male or female because I don't own anyone, nor do I expect anyone to adhere to my personal morals.
I can be friends with a woman that is in a romatic relationship with someone else, I don't feel threatened, cheated or jealous. If I enter into a romatic intimate relationship with one woman. I am not chaining her to me. She has the ability to end the intimacy anytime it suits her as well as I have the ability to end it if it suits me. Just because we are sexually involved does not mean I own her or she owns me. I see marriage differently. Marriage is a commitment and dedication to one person that implies exclusivity. Not because we own each other but because of the dedicated commitment we have towards each other. Having multiple sexual partners weakens those dedications and is frowned upon to the point of divorce. In a culture that sees women as property, women lose their independence. There is a weakening of the qualities for which a woman (or man) is individually cherished above all others. Where it works for some cultures it doesn't work in my life. For me, the difference between friendship and love is the degree to which I cherish the woman above all others. Don't get me wrong, I cherish all my friends because they are my friends but the one woman I am vulnerable to is the one woman I cherish beyond all others. When that is reciprocated, it is love in the purest sense of the word to me. Everyone has their own definition of love and friendship. I can only relate what they mean to me. For I do not walk the path of others and I don't see from behind anyone's eyes but my own. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
<<<<Reading with popcorn and water in hand preparing not to choke
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
In my life female 'friends' may have as many friends as they want, male or female because I don't own anyone, nor do I expect anyone to adhere to my personal morals. I can be friends with a woman that is in a romatic relationship with someone else, I don't feel threatened, cheated or jealous. If I enter into a romatic intimate relationship with one woman. I am not chaining her to me. She has the ability to end the intimacy anytime it suits her as well as I have the ability to end it if it suits me. Just because we are sexually involved does not mean I own her or she owns me. I see marriage differently. Marriage is a commitment and dedication to one person that implies exclusivity. Not because we own each other but because of the dedicated commitment we have towards each other. Having multiple sexual partners weakens those dedications and is frowned upon to the point of divorce. In a culture that sees women as property, women lose their independence. There is a weakening of the qualities for which a woman (or man) is individually cherished above all others. Where it works for some cultures it doesn't work in my life. For me, the difference between friendship and love is the degree to which I cherish the woman above all others. Don't get me wrong, I cherish all my friends because they are my friends but the one woman I am vulnerable to is the one woman I cherish beyond all others. When that is reciprocated, it is love in the purest sense of the word to me. Everyone has their own definition of love and friendship. I can only relate what they mean to me. For I do not walk the path of others and I don't see from behind anyone's eyes but my own.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
In my life female 'friends' may have as many friends as they want, male or female because I don't own anyone, nor do I expect anyone to adhere to my personal morals. I can be friends with a woman that is in a romatic relationship with someone else, I don't feel threatened, cheated or jealous. If I enter into a romatic intimate relationship with one woman. I am not chaining her to me. She has the ability to end the intimacy anytime it suits her as well as I have the ability to end it if it suits me. Just because we are sexually involved does not mean I own her or she owns me. I see marriage differently. Marriage is a commitment and dedication to one person that implies exclusivity. Not because we own each other but because of the dedicated commitment we have towards each other. Having multiple sexual partners weakens those dedications and is frowned upon to the point of divorce. In a culture that sees women as property, women lose their independence. There is a weakening of the qualities for which a woman (or man) is individually cherished above all others. Where it works for some cultures it doesn't work in my life. For me, the difference between friendship and love is the degree to which I cherish the woman above all others. Don't get me wrong, I cherish all my friends because they are my friends but the one woman I am vulnerable to is the one woman I cherish beyond all others. When that is reciprocated, it is love in the purest sense of the word to me. Everyone has their own definition of love and friendship. I can only relate what they mean to me. For I do not walk the path of others and I don't see from behind anyone's eyes but my own. Beautiful writing there Tom 
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Thanx for the compliment.
As I understand his questions it appears he is trying to understand the significance of friendship and intimacy as they apply to other cultures, different from his own. Since I am not an authority on anything that I have not personally experienced, I can only relate what I feel on the matter. Back up my clock a few decades and I would likely have similar questions and concerns. Experience teaches wisdom if you pay attention. The important thing to remember is that he is seeking knowledge on something he doesn't quite understand. Hopefully he will get the wisdom he seeks and has the ability to apply it to his life. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Thanx for the compliment. As I understand his questions it appears he is trying to understand the significance of friendship and intimacy as they apply to other cultures, different from his own. Since I am not an authority on anything that I have not personally experienced, I can only relate what I feel on the matter. Back up my clock a few decades and I would likely have similar questions and concerns. Experience teaches wisdom if you pay attention. The important thing to remember is that he is seeking knowledge on something he doesn't quite understand. Hopefully he will get the wisdom he seeks and has the ability to apply it to his life. Thanks Tom… thanks for the tone you use. Actually… I am not trying to understand anything… I already know more than needed. “Fine then… why are you asking such an evident question?” I hear you say.. Well.. even thought it might look an easy silly question to be asked, no male until now was able to give a definite answer. However, it’s stated in the post above why I am asking. This question was meant to be a discussion point with those who stated some weird opinions about sex and relationships and how both relate. In general these people thought that relationships shouldn’t necessarily be based on sexual interest. Well, since I disagree, since reality tells us the opposite, since psychology proves the direct opposite, I came to ask this question so that those people may understand what they are saying. So, it’s not me to who needs to understand. “What is the difference (limit) between a friendship and a relationship?” A very easy question… Were Sigmund Freud here, he would have ended the quarrel with one word! Yet, no one showed up to answer it from his/her own experience. And those who did answer, spoke in virtual not in practical. And I am not surprised that only the females were too close to the truth; you know… most females understand such things ten times better than any man… however, those female didn’t say it directly, but their answers carried the key-word many times. So, what’s my argument -which is not divine inspiration- about the topic? Clearly, in real practices of life… Any relationship that is not based on sexual interest (of any form or degree) is nothing but a Friendship. Any Friendship that has sexual interest (expressed or repressed) is not pure friendship; it’s a distorted form of Relationship. Virgin love died centuries ago.. Frankly I only met it in novels and poetry; maybe it has never been a reality. As a result, Relationship is NECESSARILY built on, motived by, and seeking SEXUAL satisfaction. We mate to procreate! And this explains the behavior of those Kings and great figures of history… they wanted to vary their breeds and DNA that will one day inherit the throne. They were NOT looking for sexual pleasure as they already were married to the sexiest women known in the whole countries and lands. The other females were there only to provide better breed. King David even though already had six or seven wives, he forced another new woman to his palace… and she did it: Her son inherited the throne after his father David. So, in short… It isn’t how much LOVE and mutual understanding there is in the relation… A Friendship is identical with a Relationship in almost every aspect.. Except one: SEX! And this is manifested in this statement: I can be friends with a woman that is in a romatic relationship with someone else, I don't feel threatened, cheated or jealous. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
A friendship relationship is not always sexual, even if it is a Man and Waman. A sexual relationship can be just about sex, no real friendship. A couple who is committed to each other has sex and friendship. this is the best answer until now... but please, lady allow me for some editing... as a designer who scrutinizes in every detail, I can't resist put my touches on your details... I would like just to retouch the first sentence only... only the first one. A friendship relationship is not always sexual, even if it is a Man and Waman. you should have said: A friendship relationship is always none-sexual, even if it is a Man and Waman. I just replaced the 'not' with 'none'... my hat off Okay that's fine! 
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Age and motivation changes the reasons for intimate relationships.
I already procreated, I already raised my family. I faced my own mortality and survived but not without a toll. Most intimate relationships require a sexual component. Not for the sake of the sexual act but to bring intimacy to its highest degree. At a certain point in maturity, replication is no longer the driving force. Sexual activity can be a form of self-gratification or placed on the back burner to more important things like compatibility and companionship. As we age, our priorities change. You are asking questions and making assumptions to a wide demographic. If you restricted this discussion to only people in their sexual prime you would likely get different results. Additionally, you are making your discussion on a dating website that has people that have been hurt in relationships. If you posted it on a site of swingers only, you will get different results. When I was in my sexual prime and single, every relationship with the opposite sex had a sexual agenda. It was vital to the relationship that we had a healthy sex life together. Now, however, my priorities have changed a bit. While sex is nice, it is not a requirement for a relationship. Hormonal changes and all that jazz. I still like sex but I have learned to slow down and appreciate it more. I couldn't 'wham bam thank you ma'am' even if I wanted to, and I don't. I respect women too much for such a childish tactic. |
|
|
|
|
