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Topic: So many matches, but no one comes near.
notbeold's photo
Sat 04/28/18 10:19 PM
Yes over 100 matches apparently, hardly any within a useful distance to visit, no interest in me whatsoever amongst the lot of them, and despite many "mutual matches" unable to meet a single one of them, or even a partnered one of them .

Some of my 'matches' are the same woman in a different photo under a different name, none of whom want any contact, even though they are even more 'matched' than the others.

I don't understand this matching process. what

no photo
Sun 04/29/18 10:33 PM
I would like to add that mutual matches are in my experience not mutual after all as i have asked the men that matched with me and they seem to be clueless about it slaphead

no photo
Sun 04/29/18 11:33 PM
I don't understand it either, but if you live in Australia you must be 11000 miles away from me so I guess I'm no help.

no photo
Sun 04/29/18 11:34 PM

I would like to add that mutual matches are in my experience not mutual after all as i have asked the men that matched with me and they seem to be clueless about it slaphead


You didn't want someone my age or I would have written, but was not allowed.

no photo
Sun 04/29/18 11:45 PM


I would like to add that mutual matches are in my experience not mutual after all as i have asked the men that matched with me and they seem to be clueless about it slaphead


You didn't want someone my age or I would have written, but was not allowed.

I do have filters set up but its more than just age. I guess youve read it in my profile :angel: has mutual match ever really been mutual for you sir?

Tom4Uhere's photo
Mon 04/30/18 12:13 AM



I would like to add that mutual matches are in my experience not mutual after all as i have asked the men that matched with me and they seem to be clueless about it slaphead


You didn't want someone my age or I would have written, but was not allowed.

I do have filters set up but its more than just age. I guess youve read it in my profile :angel: has mutual match ever really been mutual for you sir?

First, Notice this disclaimer on the Filter Settings page:
PLEASE NOTE: Mail filters apply only to the FIRST message sent between two parties. Once you've sent a message to someone, they can send mail back to you regardless of whether they meet your filter conditions. You can still block those users individually if you wish.

Then, realistically, the only match assessment that has any significance are the ones made after contacting that person and getting a reply back.
Everything else is just nonsense.
No free dating site is going to do your work for you.
I don't even use the search feature anymore.
I scan the hits on my profile in the Who Viewed Me results.
I scroll thru and look for clues of interested parties that fit my location and age preferences.
If a woman in my location, age range and has multiple repeated views of me, I send her a short message.
Most never answer but some do.
Sometimes it takes up to a month.
Of those that do answer me, so far nobody works out as a viable meet.
Sometimes its her but most of the time it is me.
I just realize that it is only going to take one.

The only TRUE matches are the ones that respond.
For me, in my area and my age range preference I am running roughly .05%.
Most of my hits for views are from profiles that are in their 20s & 30s.
Most of those are scammers and fakes.

What I am waiting for is repeating views from someone in the forums fitting my preferences.

I get many Added To Favorites notifications.
I get a lot of Friend Requests.
The ONLY friend requests I approve are ones fitting my preferences and are recognized in the forums.
I decline around 99% of all Friend Requests.
I report some but I block less.

That is how I find value in the matching section of M2.

eurekarem's photo
Mon 04/30/18 12:21 AM
Hi how are you? your profile says that I am not eligible to contact you, I don't understand why? :)

Tom4Uhere's photo
Mon 04/30/18 12:38 AM


your profile says that I am not eligible to contact you, I don't understand why?

People's preferences are set for their own reasons.
It doesn't matter why you can't message them, if you can't, move on to the next.
Personally, I set my preferences for contact loose. It allows near matches but keeps most of the non-matches away.
If a woman is near my match preferences but doesn't qualify, with my preferences loose, I know she is certainly not a viable match.
For instance,
I have my preferences set to 100 miles and 10 years younger and 5 years older. My actual preferences are 20 miles away and 5 years younger and older.
This way, a woman that is 47 can still contact me but a woman that is 45 can't. While I could make a match at 47, it would be a hard to justify match.
Optimally, I would give a woman that is 57 a perfect match for preferences. Likewise a woman within 5 miles of me would also have priorty over one that is 100 miles from me.

Using the preference system, in combination with personal response to my opening message and the content of the response message dictates which additional actions I might choose.

no photo
Mon 04/30/18 01:32 AM
I decline around 99% of all Friend Requests.


I feel so special. Thank you for accepting my request. smitten

Tom4Uhere's photo
Mon 04/30/18 02:11 AM

I decline around 99% of all Friend Requests.


I feel so special. Thank you for accepting my request. smitten

You're welcome.
I've gotten to know you a bit.
While we sometimes don't agree on the details, you are generally honorable and express wisdom. Two things that are few and far between. Two things that I hold in high regard.
You honor me with your friendship.
I honor you by accepting.

no photo
Mon 04/30/18 02:20 AM


I decline around 99% of all Friend Requests.


I feel so special. Thank you for accepting my request. smitten

You're welcome.
I've gotten to know you a bit.
While we sometimes don't agree on the details, you are generally honorable and express wisdom. Two things that are few and far between. Two things that I hold in high regard.
You honor me with your friendship.
I honor you by accepting.


Thank you. Coming from you, that is high honor. You made me smile. I think I may quote you in the "Nicest Thing Someone Said to You" thread. Lol

Tom4Uhere's photo
Mon 04/30/18 02:27 AM



I decline around 99% of all Friend Requests.


I feel so special. Thank you for accepting my request. smitten

You're welcome.
I've gotten to know you a bit.
While we sometimes don't agree on the details, you are generally honorable and express wisdom. Two things that are few and far between. Two things that I hold in high regard.
You honor me with your friendship.
I honor you by accepting.


Thank you. Coming from you, that is high honor. You made me smile. I think I may quote you in the "Nicest Thing Someone Said to You" thread. Lol

I'm sorry that was the nicest thing said to you.
Its sad that more people don't respect you.
I am weird, abnormal, unique because I do treat people with respect.
To me, that is sad.
I'm also honest. I've been told 'Thank You' from the heart by just being honest and honorable as a baseline.
Its sad that honesty is a rare thing in today's world.
That being honest is noteworthy.
It should be common, just like respect.
Its not hard and it doesn't hurt but it does spread hope.

no photo
Mon 04/30/18 02:31 AM
It's the nicest thing that someone said to me today, that is, not ever. Don't worry. I get plenty of respect. Lol

Tom4Uhere's photo
Mon 04/30/18 02:37 AM

It's the nicest thing that someone said to me today, that is, not ever. Don't worry. I get plenty of respect. Lol

:thumbsup: waving

notbeold's photo
Mon 04/30/18 08:48 AM
Most of my matches are OK except for being in other countries, or interstate regardless of my settings. tongue2

At least it is interesting seeing pictures of who I may have loved if only they were real and much closer. smitten

And I would really like to have a 26 year old 5 foot 7" gorgeous foreign girlfriend, but they never materialise. tears

yellowrose10's photo
Mon 04/30/18 09:02 AM
Mutual match has ONLY been meant as a game. A fun way to connect. People will get matches 2 ways

1. Computer generated by your search criteria

2. Members can manually match by going to a profile and click match with

Don't rely on mm. It has never been meant for nothing more than a game

no photo
Mon 04/30/18 09:32 AM

Mutual match has ONLY been meant as a game. A fun way to connect. People will get matches 2 ways

1. Computer generated by your search criteria

2. Members can manually match by going to a profile and click match with

Don't rely on mm. It has never been meant for nothing more than a game
:thumbsup:
And there ya have it folks. Welcome to the show! rant laugh

notbeold's photo
Tue 05/01/18 04:43 AM
I don't have any clever replies.

If any of my 'matches' are real, and nearby, and really interested, then please contact me, I'm not playing games. happy

Larsi666 😽's photo
Tue 05/01/18 05:19 AM

Mutual match has ONLY been meant as a game. A fun way to connect. People will get matches 2 ways

1. Computer generated by your search criteria

2. Members can manually match by going to a profile and click match with

Don't rely on mm. It has never been meant for nothing more than a game


Took me a while to find this out. But still checking from time to time, just to find out how wonderful and pretty my special one is. There ain't no match for her anyway love

Siouxsie_Q's photo
Wed 05/02/18 10:42 PM

I don't have any clever replies.



Me neither. But I can rake up a few 'clever' emoticons:

smokin drinks shades smitten drinks frustrated

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