Topic: How bawsy & courageous are you?
Stu's photo
Sun 12/30/18 06:56 AM
I'm sorry. Yes, I'm only 55 and feel life is over, and technically it is. I wish you luck and hope you find a way to do what you want with the rest of life. flowerforyou

Riverspirit1111's photo
Sun 12/30/18 07:06 AM


A little over a year ago I would have said I lost my drive.

Over the last year that has changed, I've taken more risks than I can count over the last ten years. Especially in the last couple weeks with leaving Colorado and coming to New Hampshire with no job in sight.

It feels great and has opened the door for me to explore new things and find my true purpose, I seem to have lost that somewhere along the way a while back.





Yes, I was thinking of you as well, haha. You basically were thrown out of your comfort-zone when you lost your home, right?
In general, sometimes the Universe throws something brutal on our path when we need to get off our rear end and don't do it. In retrospect it then turns out to kind of be a blessing in disguise. Much like the Tower Tarot card.
I'm truly happy how things have worked out for you!
I don't really know you, but I have seen on here from your answers and postings how much you have grown the last year, year and a half (not entirely sure, I don't keep logs, lol).
Again, don't know you, but your self-confidence levels seem to be so much higher! I never mentioned it, I didn't know if you were/are aware of it yourself, and it's quite personal to say.
But it has made me smile at times. :heart:


Thank you Crystal, yes the hurricane was the Universe's blessing in disguise!

And I have noticed, it's nice to see others have as well :heart:

sofiyudin tembongwah's photo
Sun 12/30/18 07:07 AM
When young we usually just go for things, we don't think too much about it. We like it, we want it, we do it. We often cannot fathom that some things might be too risky as we lack life experience, or we simply don't care so much.

As you get older, you get a bit wiser, you have learnt a few things, got smacked around the head a couple of times too, hihi.
Could be good as it could help you to make healthier decisions & choices in life. But it can also cause you to become stagnant.

How is this for you? Do you still dare take risks or -when totally honest- are you too careful now? Maybe so much so that you have ended up stuck in life?

Do you dare do something new? Dare go out of your comfort-zone?

Compared to when you were younger, how much have you changed in this?
Are you now afraid to undertake 'bawsy' things or have you simply lost your drive?


Riverspirit1111's photo
Sun 12/30/18 07:18 AM


Crystal,

Can what you want to do for a job be done over the internet?

I can certainly relate to your situation. I went from a 45k a year job with full benefits and insurance to nothing in one fell swoop. After 4 years of being turned down for jobs because of physical limitations, I applied for disability. That took another couple years. Now I have nothing and scared to.

Yes, if done over the internet. As long as I can sit up straight with my neck/head. That's why normal office work isn't possible as it always requires some form of paperwork (putting files away, working off paper to do stuff on PC etc.) and then I get in serious trouble.
What I want to do is coach people online in groups, not 1 on 1. There are no jobs for doing that. Which leaves starting as freelancer/own company which is a tremendous risk, huge step, especially with physical ailments. Then you're not covered if you fall ill, temporarily get no clients and so on and so forth. Plus, tax eats about 40% of revenue, so you'd have to have an awful lot of clients EACH month. I know people who do it, made a frigging fortune that way, but they also could invest a lot of time. I may not be able to do that cos of my problems. Stress makes it worse, it's the one things I have to avoid.
So I feel I'm stuck. I do not want to do nothing for the rest of my life. I'm only 52. And then there's the never having money for anything. Not handy when you want to date. Technically I cannot even buy clothes, even decent food is difficult.
Not how I want to live.
If only I COULD get disability. As far as I know, you can then earn extra, do volunteers work and so on. With the benefit I got, I can't. Not allowed to. I tried disability, but my ailments cannot be proven by science so I'm s(r*wed that way.
Difficult situation...
So I get your story!

Stupid things is... if I had a partner I COULD generate money because then the restrictions that come with the benefit would fall away... Isn't it ironic, haha.
.
.
.


I can very much relate to what you have said Crystal. I'm 56 and when I started out a year ago I had nothing, no savings and no vehicle. If not for the seasonal work that offered housing, I would not have been able to leave the Keys and start over.

It's very difficult to do what you want when there are many limitations standing in your way. It takes faith in the Universe to trust everything will fall in place if we do the foot work. I see you as having that and I believe any of your efforts to start living will be blessed fully!

I made quite a bit over the summer but in my two months of taking a break, I pretty much depleted what I had saved. So financially I am no further ahead than I was a year ago. Only difference now is I'm willing to take that chance on me to get to where I want to be... which is to live fully and enjoy this life I've been blessed with.

And yes, I agree, doing it on your own is very difficult and eliminates some of the things we'd like to do. Having a safety net, friends, and resources available to help make it possible has been a blessing.

flowerforyou :heart:

FeelYoung's photo
Sun 12/30/18 08:03 AM
Guitar Sam and Crystal - I am in a bit of the same boat. I've had Fibromyalgia for 40 years, before it really became a recognizable disease. Its never fatal and there is no "cure". Three years ago I could no longer take care of my house and huge yard, it foreclosed and I moved to apt. in small town.
I retired from Corrections (prison) and started a small business, but without a huge amount of customers, ended up selling inventory on Ebay. And THEY are not doing well now. I can still do most things, I have no problem striking a conversation with any person on the street or grocery store, but that only lasts a few minutes. Our lawn is mowed and snow is scooped by apt. management. I still drive and do wildlife photography. Would very much like to find a male companion, but at this very moment am sitting here with tears going down my face as had to delete (google really make it impossible to actually delete) messages from someone I had hoped to meet. I thought things were going well and was trying to save flight money, but this weekend got a message WE CAN NEVER BE TOGETHER. Easiest way to forget him is delete all my messages and photos. Risk? My second husband was a huge risk, but we were married 23 years until it ended. Guitar it sounds like you would work if you could and Crystal, have you seen a doctor that could ease your neck pain? I know what its like to have lots of things to do and yet waste a day that God gave me. I think most of us would take a risk and make changes if our health was way up to par. I wish both of you good luck in moving forward, and River - I just know you are going to do well. Keep on keeping on !

Rock's photo
Sun 12/30/18 08:33 AM
Crystal, over the few short years
we've been on m2 together, i've always
seen you as one of the most courageous
people here.


IgorFrankensteen's photo
Sun 12/30/18 08:44 AM
I see this whole subject a bit differently.

First, there's a big difference from my vantage point, between "being willing to take risks," and "being entirely ignorant of the risk you are taking." Most of the eagerness for adventure in youth, comes under the latter heading.

And when it comes to my decision making now, there is also a difference between "refusing or being afraid to take a risk," and "recognizing that it isn't a RISK, it's a near guaranteed failure."

When I was very young, I usually LITERALLY had nothing to lose. Risking all in a venture, doesn't take nearly as much "bravery" when "all" means fifty bucks, versus when it means your house, you ability to regain employment, your future income, and so on.

And in the area of romance and love, after learning what I did in my youth, it wouldn't be RISK, to take on another mentally ill mate, it would be emotional suicide.

Rooster35's photo
Sun 12/30/18 09:23 AM

When young we usually just go for things, we don't think too much about it. We like it, we want it, we do it. We often cannot fathom that some things might be too risky as we lack life experience, or we simply don't care so much.

As you get older, you get a bit wiser, you have learnt a few things, got smacked around the head a couple of times too, hihi.
Could be good as it could help you to make healthier decisions & choices in life. But it can also cause you to become stagnant.

How is this for you? Do you still dare take risks or -when totally honest- are you too careful now? Maybe so much so that you have ended up stuck in life?

Do you dare do something new? Dare go out of your comfort-zone?

Compared to when you were younger, how much have you changed in this?
Are you now afraid to undertake 'bawsy' things or have you simply lost your drive?


I didn't find "bawsy" in the dictionary but Courage is in the eye of the beholder.
Some 70 years ago, it was considered courageous to save a wounded fellow soldier away from the heat of battle. Nowadays, when a woman delivers a scathing rebuke to a sexist VIP on Twitter, she's called "courageous"...

But to answer your questions:
-Do you still dare take risks or -when totally honest- are you too careful now?
There is no such thing as "too careful", especially these days when ONE misplaced word can cost you a whole career.
As far as "totally honest", there is a place and time, and a certain company to keep, to be totally honest with and total strangers do not belong to that category. Not all questions demand and/or warrant an answer.
Being "stuck in life" is subjective. No one is ever "stuck" unless they have accepted the illusion they, or others, have built around them.

-Do you dare do something new? Dare go out of your comfort-zone?
I still "dare" to try new things, as I've always done before. I've always been adventurous, curious and interested. Yet with age and experience, Reflexion wins over Impulse and the risks are weighed much more seriously.

-Compared to when you were younger, how much have you changed in this?
I've changed proportionately with the times and in accordance with my observations on the state of our society today. Things I used to do or thoughtlessly jumped into 30 years ago would certainly now cost me my freedom, if not my life.

-Are you now afraid to undertake 'bawsy' things or have you simply lost your drive?
That depends on what those "bawsy things" actually are and who is involved, if anyone. And there are now, for me, health matters to take into consideration. I would still go parachuting but not bungee jumping anymore. I could and still would manage a department store or direct a crew of 20 on a multi-million project but I would not go about it now the same way I have before.
People change...and often for good reasons.


SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Sun 12/30/18 10:17 AM

Crystal, over the few short years
we've been on m2 together, i've always
seen you as one of the most courageous
people here.



Thank you, Rock, that dang near makes me cry!
I am not a quitter, I am not negative about the future either, I haven't given up. I have dreams and goals I want to manifest and am working on that.
I also KNOW it IS possible to build something for myself, to become independent. I mean, if others can do it successfully, making millions even!, why wouldn't it be possible for me? It's a matter of mindset and sometimes I'm there, but I can't consistently hold on to it.
I won't give up on that though! I have manifested an awful lot this year so I know I can do it, I know there's plenty of people who want what I have to offer.
Now it's overcoming the fear and belief that I can't make enough.
So you're quite right in your observation, hihi. It's just that sometimes I get so freakin' scared of having to do it all alone.
flowerforyou

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Sun 12/30/18 10:34 AM

I see this whole subject a bit differently.

First, there's a big difference from my vantage point, between "being willing to take risks," and "being entirely ignorant of the risk you are taking." Most of the eagerness for adventure in youth, comes under the latter heading.

And when it comes to my decision making now, there is also a difference between "refusing or being afraid to take a risk," and "recognizing that it isn't a RISK, it's a near guaranteed failure."

When I was very young, I usually LITERALLY had nothing to lose. Risking all in a venture, doesn't take nearly as much "bravery" when "all" means fifty bucks, versus when it means your house, you ability to regain employment, your future income, and so on.

And in the area of romance and love, after learning what I did in my youth, it wouldn't be RISK, to take on another mentally ill mate, it would be emotional suicide.

Hmm... in a way risking all when you only have $50 can be much scarier...
But in a way you're making it too difficult, hihi.
What about things that aren't a guaranteed failure, but ARE out of your comfort-zone, maybe way out of it. Do you still then dare do such things?
Or do you maybe not even care about that anymore, just sit in your comfort-zone and that's it?

I think when younger we either go out of our comfort-zones with much more ease, possibly because our comfort-zones are larger than when we're older. But thing is, if we never go out of it, it won't get larger. It gets smaller by never doing things outside of the comfort-zone.

no photo
Sun 12/30/18 11:34 AM


Crystal, over the few short years
we've been on m2 together, i've always
seen you as one of the most courageous
people here.



Thank you, Rock, that dang near makes me cry!
I am not a quitter, I am not negative about the future either, I haven't given up. I have dreams and goals I want to manifest and am working on that.
I also KNOW it IS possible to build something for myself, to become independent. I mean, if others can do it successfully, making millions even!, why wouldn't it be possible for me? It's a matter of mindset and sometimes I'm there, but I can't consistently hold on to it.
I won't give up on that though! I have manifested an awful lot this year so I know I can do it, I know there's plenty of people who want what I have to offer.
Now it's overcoming the fear and belief that I can't make enough.
So you're quite right in your observation, hihi. It's just that sometimes I get so freakin' scared of having to do it all alone.
flowerforyou

darlin you are never alone. even if it's just virtual support and a virtual mingle kick in the buttflowerforyou

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Sun 12/30/18 12:07 PM



Crystal, over the few short years
we've been on m2 together, i've always
seen you as one of the most courageous
people here.



Thank you, Rock, that dang near makes me cry!
I am not a quitter, I am not negative about the future either, I haven't given up. I have dreams and goals I want to manifest and am working on that.
I also KNOW it IS possible to build something for myself, to become independent. I mean, if others can do it successfully, making millions even!, why wouldn't it be possible for me? It's a matter of mindset and sometimes I'm there, but I can't consistently hold on to it.
I won't give up on that though! I have manifested an awful lot this year so I know I can do it, I know there's plenty of people who want what I have to offer.
Now it's overcoming the fear and belief that I can't make enough.
So you're quite right in your observation, hihi. It's just that sometimes I get so freakin' scared of having to do it all alone.
flowerforyou

darlin you are never alone. even if it's just virtual support and a virtual mingle kick in the buttflowerforyou

Thank you, Eric! And yes, I know people online can be of great support!
flowerforyou

Richie Rich's photo
Sun 12/30/18 01:48 PM

Especially in the last couple weeks with leaving Colorado and coming to New Hampshire with no job in sight.








I grew up in NH. I have lived in Pembroke, East Kingston, Exeter, Brentwood, Raymond and Northwood - my parents moved around a lot. I left in 1988 when I went in to the Marines, right after graduating H.S. How are you liking it? Beautiful place. Where abouts did you move to?

Riverspirit1111's photo
Sun 12/30/18 04:48 PM


Especially in the last couple weeks with leaving Colorado and coming to New Hampshire with no job in sight.








I grew up in NH. I have lived in Pembroke, East Kingston, Exeter, Brentwood, Raymond and Northwood - my parents moved around a lot. I left in 1988 when I went in to the Marines, right after graduating H.S. How are you liking it? Beautiful place. Where abouts did you move to?


That's cool! Yes it's beautiful here. I'm near Manchester, in Londonderry. Before this year last time I was in New England was when I was born, in Weymouth MA. My dad was in the Coast Guard, we only stayed there for a year or so.. I think.

JustBeHonest's photo
Sun 12/30/18 05:07 PM
Edited by JustBeHonest on Sun 12/30/18 05:13 PM
I wasn’t a big risk taker when I was younger but made some very foolish choices.

Now I am a risk taker. In the last 2 years, I gave up a secure but unhappy life, moved to a new town, bought a home hoping I can afford it alone, recently started a relationship with someone I probably wouldn’t have considered dating a few months ago. I am meeting new people. I am using power tools which is a definite risk, trying to do new things on my own.

I’m happy that I have taken risks. I am so much happier

:smile:

Dodo_David's photo
Sun 12/30/18 05:07 PM
If you Humans think that you are courageous, then try attending a Vogon poetry festival.

no photo
Sun 12/30/18 05:26 PM

If you Humans think that you are courageous, then try attending a Vogon poetry festival.

there is a fine line between courageous and suicidal. and vogon poetry is light years past that line david

Dodo_David's photo
Sun 12/30/18 05:53 PM
A Vogon poetry festival is a rare occurrence because planets voluntarily self-destruct in order to avoid hosting it.

Some Melmacians speculate that such was the real reason for the destruction of planet Melmac.

Vogon poetry is so bad that cats have been known to jump into the mouths of Melmacians in order to avoid listening to the stuff.

Once, I attended a Vogon poetry reading at a place full of cats. I didn't actually hear anything because I wore ear plug, but I did eat well.

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Mon 12/31/18 02:35 AM

I wasn’t a big risk taker when I was younger but made some very foolish choices.

Now I am a risk taker. In the last 2 years, I gave up a secure but unhappy life, moved to a new town, bought a home hoping I can afford it alone, recently started a relationship with someone I probably wouldn’t have considered dating a few months ago. I am meeting new people. I am using power tools which is a definite risk, trying to do new things on my own.

I’m happy that I have taken risks. I am so much happier

:smile:

Absolutely great!! flowerforyou
That's the thing isn't it: you are happier when you take more risks. Often these aren't even real risks, but only feel like that.

These days I deliberately get out of my comfort-zone more often, like going to a gig, a day in Amsterdam, tonight a NYE event.
I can get so nervous about silly things because I hardly ever do them so I'm not familiar with it. Like using public transport. Or finding parking space in a busy city I don't know etc. The latter is my worry for tonight, hihi. I really don't like Rotterdam, don't know the place, and I'm worried stiff about finding parking space. Sounds silly I know, but it makes me so nervous that I'd almost chicken out of doing these things. They feel like risks. Big risks, hihi.
Then I tell myself to not be silly. I've done all these things when living in Australia and Indonesia, and those were a strange countries. Then why worry about something as simple as finding parking space in my own country?

This is what happens when your world has gotten so small because for years you had lack of money and couldn't go out. Living in a remote area doesn't help either.
So I'm currently trying to change this around a bit.

no photo
Mon 12/31/18 07:42 AM
I'm still figuring out how ballsy I actually can be. Still searching for new experiences that are out of my comfort zone.