Topic: The one that got away
msharmony's photo
Sun 02/17/19 07:56 AM
It seems movie stars and celebrities go through many break ups and marriages. It must be hard to live life under that constant microscope, constant gossip and tabloids making up things about your relationship or your partner. It must be maddening on some level.

I notice, perhaps due to being a female, more MEN seeming to display true remorse and brokeness over whatever choices led to the demise of their relationships.

Robin Thicke, has not seemed the same since he lost his wife Paula. Although I still am a huge fan of his music anyway.

Channing Tatum always appears empty to me, faking life, since he lost his wife Jenna Dewan.


Ben Affleck has been in and out of rehabs and seems to only barely be existing since he lost his wife Jennifer Garner.


There is such sadness in the eyes of these men that makes me think their wives were truly the best things they had going.

Have you noticed this trend in any women? It just seems to me that the women bounce back easier, but it could just be appearances.


Do you think the men mourn their relationships harder than the women do?

Totage's photo
Sun 02/17/19 08:12 AM
I don't think either gender mourns harder than the other. There's differences in how each gender handles and displays emotions. Of course, each person and relationship is different as well, which adds more complexity to how we handle our emotions.


Bob's photo
Sun 02/17/19 09:00 AM
I think women are overall stronger, especially emotionally, though men try to hide it more.

msharmony's photo
Sun 02/17/19 09:01 AM

I think women are overall stronger, especially emotionally, though men try to hide it more.



I was thinking about that too. In all my examples, kids are involved. Generally speaking, mothers are left much more busy caring for them and perhaps that serves to distract them or help them be strong enough to move on a little easier.



Dodo_David's photo
Sun 02/17/19 09:32 AM

It seems movie stars and celebrities go through many break ups and marriages. It must be hard to live life under that constant microscope, constant gossip and tabloids making up things about your relationship or your partner. It must be maddening on some level.

I notice, perhaps due to being a female, more MEN seeming to display true remorse and brokeness over whatever choices led to the demise of their relationships.


IMHO, way too many female celebrities think of themselves as being too hot to remain single for very long. So, they don't worry about a relationship breaking up.

msharmony's photo
Sun 02/17/19 12:58 PM
Interesting perception. Do you think in today's age of totally casual sexual encounters and appearances, that marriage still would be what they would opt for just to avoid seeming to appear single?


No1phD's photo
Sun 02/17/19 01:25 PM
I think it's a point that women tend to close a door on a relationship hard.. when it is done... they don't tend to look back.. they are forward-thinking.... if they weren't they would never go through the pain of childbirth..lol...

We're Men however.. tend to live in the moment.. that's why we are so easily distracted.. buy a pretty girl walking past...
. We don't really give thought to the consequences of our actions... until the reality of our actions come to nest....
Then we freak out... oh my God she's not here to make my sandwich anymore.. what am I going to do..lol


msharmony's photo
Sun 02/17/19 06:30 PM

I think it's a point that women tend to close a door on a relationship hard.. when it is done... they don't tend to look back.. they are forward-thinking.... if they weren't they would never go through the pain of childbirth..lol...

We're Men however.. tend to live in the moment.. that's why we are so easily distracted.. buy a pretty girl walking past...
. We don't really give thought to the consequences of our actions... until the reality of our actions come to nest....
Then we freak out... oh my God she's not here to make my sandwich anymore.. what am I going to do..lol





poor guys ... lolhappy

Bob's photo
Sun 02/17/19 07:13 PM
Besides their jobs, women are the care givers and maintainers of the home. When they split they still do the same work with one less problem, the man.
Men go to work & come home to a functioning home at night. With the woman gone the man's life changes drasticly.

Lpdon's photo
Mon 02/25/19 01:15 AM

It seems movie stars and celebrities go through many break ups and marriages. It must be hard to live life under that constant microscope, constant gossip and tabloids making up things about your relationship or your partner. It must be maddening on some level.

I notice, perhaps due to being a female, more MEN seeming to display true remorse and brokeness over whatever choices led to the demise of their relationships.

Robin Thicke, has not seemed the same since he lost his wife Paula. Although I still am a huge fan of his music anyway.

Channing Tatum always appears empty to me, faking life, since he lost his wife Jenna Dewan.


Ben Affleck has been in and out of rehabs and seems to only barely be existing since he lost his wife Jennifer Garner.


There is such sadness in the eyes of these men that makes me think their wives were truly the best things they had going.

Have you noticed this trend in any women? It just seems to me that the women bounce back easier, but it could just be appearances.


Do you think the men mourn their relationships harder than the women do?


Affleck had a drinking problem long before he met Jennifer. She left him because of his drinking, he didn't start after she left.

Tatum has been with Jessie J since October and the two are very happy with Tatum attending many of her shows.

Liz's photo
Mon 02/25/19 01:03 PM
Haha, that's funny...and yet not

Liz's photo
Mon 02/25/19 01:05 PM
Men grieve...for a short time...but then they move right along to another relationship...i think faster than women.

no photo
Mon 02/25/19 01:35 PM
I just think it plays into s greater point and stereotypical pattern. And that is, men in general are just not as good as talking about their emotions, yes ladies, not even to their 'besty'
That's usually the hypothesis put forward as to why the suicide rate is higher in men. And personally I agree with that hypothesis

Lpdon's photo
Mon 02/25/19 02:00 PM

Men grieve...for a short time...but then they move right along to another relationship...i think faster than women.


That was a messed up thing to say. I haven't gotten over my ex wife, moved on or been with anyone else since my divorce in 2014.

JustBeHonest's photo
Mon 02/25/19 02:17 PM


I think it depends on who left who! After 2 yrs, My ex is still snooping trying to find out if I’m dating lol.

In general, men seem to take it harder. In my experience, men don’t like to be alone once they’ve been in a relationship.

Women cry and move on.

IgorFrankensteen's photo
Mon 02/25/19 03:09 PM

It seems movie stars and celebrities go through many break ups and marriages. It must be hard to live life under that constant microscope, constant gossip and tabloids making up things about your relationship or your partner. It must be maddening on some level.

I notice, perhaps due to being a female, more MEN seeming to display true remorse and brokeness over whatever choices led to the demise of their relationships.

Robin Thicke, has not seemed the same since he lost his wife Paula. Although I still am a huge fan of his music anyway.

Channing Tatum always appears empty to me, faking life, since he lost his wife Jenna Dewan.


Ben Affleck has been in and out of rehabs and seems to only barely be existing since he lost his wife Jennifer Garner.


There is such sadness in the eyes of these men that makes me think their wives were truly the best things they had going.

Have you noticed this trend in any women? It just seems to me that the women bounce back easier, but it could just be appearances.


Do you think the men mourn their relationships harder than the women do?


I think men and women are GENERALLY different in various ways about this, but I'm not sure one or the other feel romantic losses more deeply. Perhaps we "perform mourning" differently.

I know I've seen lots of people who broke off with their mate, and then very ostentatiously behaved as though they were absolutely in heaven because of it. But sometimes it was a charade, a sort of revenge.

I've known some who appeared to suffer horribly, too, but not all were suffering the same ways or for the same reasons. Some were really only in agony, because their ego had never before suffered such an insult. They weren't mourning the loss of their mate, they were worshipping at the great "poor me" altar.

Especially when I was younger, I was convinced that at least the girls/women who had claimed to love ME, easily recovered and moved on. But I'm of an unusual constitution, being genetically shy, and overly thoughtful; and the women/girls had plenty of easy to find replacements for me. I don't actually know whether they felt the hurt of failure any less deeply than I did, especially since I made it a point to stay away from anyone who I broke with.

When it comes to observations of famous people, everything is different. Lots of famous people I've watched, seemed to be in relationships for reasons other than a search for a long term partner to begin with. One thing I think I saw more than once, were famous couples that I was sure only paired up because they looked like each other. And that they loved THEMSELVES so very much, mating with a look-alike, was as close to having sex with themselves in another body as they could manage. Those kinds of couples always broke up a few years later, I think because they finally realized that the other person WASN'T themself after all.