why do they seem to avoid a normal woman? they say they dont want drama yet seek dramatic younger women with nothing but their looks going for them.

There is always guys, who are not normal. Because normal can be boring

... well I might start a crowdfunding campaign for those poor girls, that can't afford proper clothes

For the same reason that some women imagine things about older men.

I'm not an older man but I imagine it's because we start with idealization and often end with denigration, we just want what we want. Part of dating is identifying what other people want and putting some effort in to align yourself with that.

Define "normal" woman.

Is normal based soley, on the woman's age.

Humm ... first of all what is normal as far as what one prefers?

Just cause a man/woman is older, why should they only see those that are their age..

Men/Women are no different even older women seem to at times happen to look at the younger guys.

Besides we all like to be proud of the one we are with even if it is for a bit of eye candy~~~

Life is too short to stick with what some call normal~~~~

Most older, single men have been through the following:
1. Having and raising children
2. Job disappointments
3. A health scare
4. A divorce
5. A reduction in their financial status
6. Adaption to a single lifestyle
7. A lack of an acceptable sex life

So now comes the question of what are they looking for? Are you and what you want what they are looking for? Some enjoy the thought of again being in a close relationship, perhaps even something close to marriage. Others are enjoying the freedom of being single and having a single lifestyle. They are not much interested in a relationship that would change their lifestyle. Where do you, as a "normal" woman, fit into what older, single men are looking for?

Somewhat older women may have been through the following:
1. Having and raising children
2. Job disappointments
3. A health scare
4. A divorce
5. A reduction in their financial status
6. Adaption to a single lifestyle
7. A lack of an acceptable sex life

But guess what: we deal with it!
It nothing special you know. It's called "LIFE".

And not everyone has had:
2. Job disappointments
3. A health scare
5. A reduction in their financial status
7. A lack of an acceptable sex life

Nor problems with
6. Adaption to a single lifestyle

Many older men experience problems with getting older -more so than women.
Men derive their sense of worth from status like a good job, money, a house, a nice wife and so on.
As they age they notice they cannot keep up so much anymore. Younger men are faster, have new knowledge and education and so on.
The so called midlife crisis. They seem to feel they can resolve these problems by getting a young woman, just like you often see old geezers drive a sport's car.
Kind of to say "See, I'm still worthy! I still matter!"
Apparently men also experience more hormonal changes than has been assumed for a long time.

Some men may realize as they get older it's time to pass the baton. Younger men in relationships are leaders, drivers and providers. As they age you see the wife making more decisions, doing the driving etc. A younger woman, besides being a partner, will take over more decisions, can drive & will become the care giver to the older man, as he realizes his own mortality.

Yup...

not many women take the time to understand this.

Many of us have spent the last couple of decades working to raise the children and pay the bills. The children grew up. And then there's another man, knackered old husband cant compete, and is cast aside like an old rag doll..
An old rag doll, I tell you Sepiasands. :)
I think people deal with this in different ways.
I want a partner similar to my own age. As I think most do.I think the younger woman thing is a re assertion of masculinity. Pretty much what you said really.

And I say it's also foolishness.

Far too many older women have been through marriage and relationships and still think the high school football quarterback or the white knight on a steed will come over the hill and rescue them. A lifetime of reality doesn't change the things they expected in high school.

Lately Normal is pretty bad.
I'm looking for exceptional.

What's normal?

I've dated women my age. I've dated younger women. The woman I've been seeing for a good while now is younger than me by 20 years. She's 37. And so far I've been with this one longer than most I've been with. It seems to me, this is just my experience, Most of the women I've dated that are my age, all they seem to care about is what I have. Many of the women my age, by the 6th, maybe 8th date they are already telling me how they want me to spend my money on them.

When a woman starts that with me she winds up getting kicked to the curb. But so far the younger women are interested in me. They actually want to spend time with me and it doesn't matter where we go or what we do. We don't have to go anywhere or do anything. She says she is content just being with me.

I don't know why it's always been this way with me. It just always has. The woman I'm with now, I've been with her a little over a year. And not one time has she ever mentioned selling my shop or my land. Not one time has a younger woman I was dating ever tried to tell me what they wanted me to do with my "stuff".


The last woman I dated that was my age, she thought she could tell me what I was going to do about my grown son. How I shouldn't spend my money on my sons. And how we were going to sell all my stuff and use the money to travel and take her places she wanted to go and see.

I just don't seem to have these problems with younger women. You can believe me when I say, I've met some doozies. (older.) There have been a few goofy minded younger women that have come and gone in my life. But when I stop and think about it, I've had more trouble and aggravation out of women my age.

One last thing. I don't mean this to be insulting. But it's just the truth as I've seen it. Many times in my life dating younger and older I have found that the younger woman has less emotional baggage than the older woman. The older a woman is usually more withdrawn. Many of them seem hard to reach. Some still run around with their heads in the clouds. Some seem to have these high minded ways. They can find 15 reasons not to date this guy. Nothing is good enough.

I even came across one that tried to compare me to her dead husband all the time. Nothing I did was right or good enough. "Tom" would have done it differently. Emotional baggage.

Many younger women haven't had to go through as much crap. Hence, less emotional baggage. More dateable. Just my experience.

Many of us guys just take it as it comes. We figured out status is garbage. Some do put status as something to attain. Then guys like me look at the status seeker, and say to them in their mind, 'You idiot'. One I knew pretty well, we put him in the hole a couple years ago. The only person I have to keep up with, is me. Midlife crisis? Never saw it. You could say I did, because I ride. But since I started at age 12, I never stopped. A few past girlfriends thought I'd stop when I got involved with them. Instead, I got uninvolved with them. No woman is more important than me riding.

That's what I'm wondering...
On the defense of younger women, I've known a few (not a LOT) of 25 yr olds that totally have their heads attached correctly, they are matured - over the partygirl mentality and would make a GREAT wife.

On the other hand, I've met a few 50 yr olds that were as crazy as a loon, and acted like they were back in their teens, irresponsible, air-headed, and I'll refrain from going as far as the B word... Perhaps they had grown tired of being mature and decided to just say F it all... Not sure as I didn't know them in their 40's.

I can only speak for THIS "older guy" (to drag myself back to the topic for this thread), but I'm searching for that rare and special woman with maturity and responsible, but ALSO still able to have a child, and preferably not have grandchildren already. This kind of precludes women over I say about 42 or 44, but maybe THAT has changed over the years as well... I operating from what I understood USED to be the age for menapause.

I realize that is different for every woman, and I have heard of 50 yr olds having babies, but I'm guessing those are far and fewer between than the mature 35 yr old.

i must agree with you its my experence too

I was going to just post this to the OP but I can't because I'm too old by a year, kind of ironic huh?
Anyhow I don't avoid any women or try to put them in a categories, everyone is unique. In the past 6 months I've dated women from 27 to 64 and from waitresses to a lawyer. None of them (I'm still seeing three) have asked me for money and a couple who I could tell were either down on their luck/had younger kids passed when I offered them small loans. I do always insist that if we are going on a date I pay for babysitters and things like that and I'm "old school" I guess, I don't believe in her paying for well anything really.
There are women out there (probably more older than younger) that will have a long list of qualifications that must be met before dating them and I will admit that if the list is too long I just won't involve myself to start.
In fairness I know that I'm pretty set in my ways as I'm sure many men are so I try to not be too quick to judge.
For the most part treat her right and she'll do the same, if not it show fast and you can get away...

Don't forget "normal" is just a setting on a washing machine anyway.

Most older people have been through some life experiences that have changed them. Who they are today is different than who they were in their 30s and 40s. Their current outlook on life substantially affects their choices in who they would be interested in as a future companion or partner. Until we older men and women actually engage in meaningful discussion of the necessary characteristics of someone we would like to find, we will continue to look without much success until we give up.

oldkid, I agree with what you're saying here but I have to say that you seem to have a very negative attitude. If you're negative that's what you'll attract. I'm saying this respectfully because I respect my elders, just my opinion.