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The laws are slowly changing to be gender neutral but will always penalize the more productive one of a marriage and reward the unproductive one. With our social welfare system, it is to the benefit of the state to make sure the unproductive one has some level of support or resources so that the state doesn't have to support them.
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Topic:
Where are you from guys xx
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Home base is in Minnesota. It is winter so I'm a little further south near Branson, MO, All in the USA.
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Topic:
living together
Edited by
oldkid46
on
Sat 02/19/22 06:39 AM
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This is why some will never get married again!!!!
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It seems that single women seldom put themselves out there in public where others can meet them. Usually when they do it is part of a larger group. If you are part of that larger group, most others are not going to attempt to get to meet you! If you are looking for a man with certain characteristics, you need to be visiting where he will most likely be.
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Topic:
Do mother's teach men to ...
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The more confident a man is with meeting his domestic needs, the bigger the challenge for a woman to show her qualities that he will appreciate.
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I suspect most of us just live our lives as we choose and do not waste the time feeling sorry for ourselves. The difference may be where our lifestyles differ and the geographic area we call home or areas where we visit. Those who live close to a large metro area have a much better opportunity to meet possible interests than those of us where the supply is significantly constrained.
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Not afraid of the commitment but of the divorce if it comes!
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Don't think it is just you!! What you describe is a common affliction of older men. It seems that many of us are destined to spend our last years seeking but not finding.
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Topic:
Voting In November ...
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I need to get my other 2 voter registrations done before the deadline!
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The only things different when fall gets here is that it will be cooler and the leaves will change color. The rest of the **** is just going to get deeper until we, as people, change the direction.
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Topic:
age and distance
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Yes, we all get some useless mail and there are some filters although they do not work very well for some folks. Just remember when you set those filters that you may be eliminating a number of potentials by setting your filters too tight. Sometimes people have a perception of what they are not willing to accept based on some negative experience and apply that perception to all who fall within a similar demographic. For instance, he/she is too far away. What you may not know is that he/she is moving in your direction or just happens to have family living in your area and visits regularly. Same goes for age limits, not everyone of a given age is the same in appearance or attitude. Better to cast a wider net and throw back a few rejects.
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Topic:
Minnesota chat
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Being safe and practicing good Covid mitigation are the most important things for the weekend. I'm very concerned there will be a spike in cases over the next couple weeks. Gov is considering shutting down all the bars again; if he does, it probably would be effective on Friday. Thankfully, the liquor stores will still be open!!!
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Topic:
Police brutality ...
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I wanted to put this out before I forget ...  I was listening to one of my shows I like ... and never thought about it this way ... there have been 3 black hangings and they are saying it is suicide... really they expect those to believe that ... being all the violence with the police ... sounds like to me it is the white supremacists groups ... reverting to their old ways ... but what I heard was ... could be a serial killer ... found that interesting ... and if it is ... that group is across the united states ... and not ashamed of who they are ... or what they do to blacks ... they might be able to prove it but will be hard ... since their are some raciest cops ...they might have had a hand in it ... becouse of the charges brought about the police in those ...killings... of the innocent black men ... and yes slavery still is going on now ... along with female & men sex trafficking... wonder if Jeffrey Epstein used young black women or girls ... and how many rich use different nationality's to work for them almost for free ... or even kidnapping ...I heard goes on with some... I did not look at anchamima syrup as being racist ... I just thought it was a very good syrup ... but they have to do what they need to do ... with all the food names ... Thank you so much mystical. There have been so many things brought up here to address in this thread. First, I am saddened by the 'some people have it worse' argument. BEing beaten AND raped my be worse than just being beaten, but that has nothing to do with whether being beaten is bad. Immmigrants do have it worse for very hard work, which means that should ALSO be addressed. IT is an additional issue, not one that somehow negates other issues. Second, about the hangings, I can at least understand that suicides do happen this way, and that current times may make some folks suicidal. I do not believe that is the case with ALL of these hangings, but I understand the tendency to rather think they were than to think they were homicides. Third. I hate to hear people talk about employment and wages as if it's like going outside to pick your favorite weed. As I have stated before, there are many factors, like region one lives in and what employment is available IN that region, and what qualifications and/or numbers are competing for the job opening, and whether pay is commiserate with the expenses to go to a job, like potential child care and transportation and wardrobe costs, et cetera. It is not just a simple 'just get a job' equation. And the assumption of whether those needing or receiving assistance are just 'sitting' on welfare. Welfare does not even allow people to 'sit' on it anymore. The stereotypes must stop. The wages MUST keep up regionally with the costs of living. I personally think the subjective standard of the 'value' of work should be set at a minimum in all regions, based on the minimum cost of living for an individual residing there. AS to the racist brand names, I feel honestly that people are too soft and triggered by too many things. The names are based upon the names that were founded, and as brands, and understanding the context of their founding, I am not personally upset or in need of them to change their brand names. I feel like, with retail items, market will determine whether something is wanted or not. I buy Aunt Jemima because it tastes good and it is the name I know, not because I don't like the particular image of a black woman they chose. However, each brand or company should be able to decide if they want to change branding or image. The market will direct them along the way. Finding a job is almost as easy as going out and picking your favorite weed, and a single person should be able to survive on something close to minimum wage. The issue becomes when a single woman with 3 illegitimate kids gets a job they have to find someone to watch those kids and they have 4 mouths to feed and shelter instead of just 1 and generally they have no skills or experience to bring to the table to make them worth a higher wage, even people with college degrees often have to start at a low wage until they have experience in the field. And if a guy has child support to pay he's in basically the same position as the single mom just without the daycare responsibility. I've been thru the 4 simple steps to keep a job that many cannot fallow. 1. Show up on time. 2.show up everyday. 3.do your work while you are at work. 4. Act professional while you are at work. Millions are able to do this everyday, however many are not able to preform these tasks often because they just don't have respect. Life choices at a young age can affect not only you but possibly generations to come. There are good jobs out there in construction and production and they are willing to train the right people, but these people need to fallow the 4 rules. I haven't really been following the hangings but I will say when a loser like Floyd becomes a hero some people who are just not right may see this as a way to make a name for themselves. While others may have been supremacists who feel the blacks are gaining too much power at this time. However I don't believe there is any kind of police conspiracy going on. With all the video being taken in this day n age its hard to believe at least something would not be picked up somewhere. There may be a rouge officer here or there, but for the most part not only blacks, but also other nationalities are getting killed by cops because of their fighting, fleeing, and going for the officers weapons. These cops are making life and death decisions not only of the suspects, but also their own lives and public safety. I think many have been pushed so hard so many times that it becomes only a matter of time before something happens. In a lot of ways these officers go thru things similarly to soldiers in some of the crime infested neighborhoods and yet are still expected to function as an ordinary person on a daily basis even though we've become all too familiar with the difficulty many returning soldiers have adapting back to civilian life. This seems very judgmental and misogynist. What does it matter if a child is 'legitimate' and how is any child not? Life spans over many years, and many things can and do happen that leave people as single parents besides just some 'illegitimate' situation. Here in Vegas, minimum wage is about 8.50. That means, if you get 40 hours, 340 a week, before tax, before any kind of insurance. If one does not mind living amongst roaches and drugs and crime, they may get a one bedroom for 750 dollars. IF we do not consider taxes or insurance, that leaves roughly 500 a month for their gas, electric, telephone, grocery, and transportation, that is IF they do not mind living with roaches, drug and crime. And then, as I said before, you do not just go out and 'get' a job. In such areas, the competition for even low wage will be high, and employers paying those wages do not want seasoned workers who are not as easily moldable or trainable, and possibly more skilled or wise than they are. I do not know what type of jobs you have competed for as an adult, but I believe the outlook expressed here to be idealistic and narcissistic. Many people have many various situations. You being able to do something, does not make those who can or do not do it any less or more 'lazy' or disrespectful than you. As for Floyd, I do not know who says he is a hero or why he needs to be for his impact upon societal views and possibly societal change to be recognized. |
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Topic:
Looking for Minnesota man
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You might try putting your post in the Minnesota forums, might be some Minnesota men there!
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Topic:
Face-Mask Hoax Being Spread
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masks won't stop you from getting sick...that is the first hoax they need to debunk If you are at risk (or scared), then don't go out. You quarantine the sick, not the healthy. (Although you get an A+ in modern thinking. SUE!! SUE!!! SUE!!!!!!) |
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Until people smarten themselves and care about humanity and vote out the idiots in office the better off we will be. People always whine about the ones in office, but you mustn't forget that those were chosen by a majority of people who see things the same way. Change has to start with the people. So that's slightly different, it's not about voting them out, it's about people having to change. The US has a helluva lot of problems, one of which is the B & W issue that's been going on for as long as American has been founded. Lord knows how to change that. There's always a lot of good people on both sides, unfortunately the ones that aren't so nice to the other party are more powerful. Both B & W would have to change and become willing and open towards the other party. Black people discriminate just the same, there's even whole areas where white people cannot go for their own safety. That chit has to change. Another HUGE problem in the US, probably mostly in the southern states, is religion. Then there's other major problems, like healthcare, proper housing for everyone so people don't live on the streets, in shambles, or caravans anymore. Good minimum wages, automatically getting days off when you work etc etc. All arranged by law. None of these are easy things to sort as everyone is use to how it is, feels entitled, is resistant to change, and so on and so forth. I'm glad I'm not the one who has to sort it out. But it's like I said before on here: the world won't get stable until the US sorts its chit out. Not because you are überpowerful like many Americans think, but because you are part of a whole, a cog. The whole cannot work properly if a cog is still stuck or broken. Let's hope it'll work itself out, sooner rather than later. And none of this btw is meant to be offensive. Just reality. |
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Topic:
Police brutality ...
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Don't mix up minimum wage and living wage. They are often very different things. The other part of reality is when minimum wage increases, wages for skilled workers will also go up. Yes inflation is often the end result.
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Topic:
Police brutality ...
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I agree. We also acknowledge what it costs in a region to pay for basic living expenses like rent/mortgage, gas, electric, internet, phone, food, and whether pay in that region is enough to sustain it. And we need to acknowledge which jobs are actually open in a region and how much competition there is for those jobs. That acknowledgment, I think, would follow with the acknowledgment that it is not so simple to just 'get a job', if the purpose of working is to have basic living expenses. |
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Topic:
Police brutality ...
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It seems that the new rule for the police is never shoot anyone who isn't an immediate mortal danger to you or someone in the immediate vicinity. What the criminal did in the past or may do in the future is not relevant. Now we need legislation to protect the police from liability when they let someone who resists arrest run away. For instance the Friday night death in Atlanta. The police could have just given him a summons for DUI and let him go. Had he stumbled into the street and gotten killed by a car, the police would be sued. Had he went home angry and beat up his wife, the police would have been sued. Had he hijacked a car and then killed someone on the road, the police would have been responsible. Why did he resist arrest when it became obvious they were going to take him in and book him? Was there an arrest warrant out for him? Was he not who he claimed to be? It seems that most black men that have been killed by police were either fighting with the officers or running away. What were they trying to hide? Normal people do not resist arrest for most crimes. I think it is a different cultural mentality. I think violence begets violence mostly. Less violence begets less violence, like a cycle. Treat people as a threat, and they start expecting to be seen as a threat, and making poor choices to defend themselves from that. I think also that the UK is much more whitewashed in many places than America, making it easy to see the bad apples as still 'one of us', than here in the US where there are more types of minorities that can be seen as 'them'. These are just thoughts, of course. But I find many countries that have policies that would be decried as 'socialist' here do seem to have more regard for human life and caring about the community and not just the self. Here in the US today, we have those 2 extremes: large urban areas and small rural areas. The people who live there have very different perspectives on life especially when it comes to self sufficiency. There is also much less racial conflict in small cities as there are very few minorities especially African-American. Those that are in the area tend to meld in and be part of the community. Kids all go to the same schools and have the same opportunities and teachers. When you are in the same class, have lunch together, and all support the same sports team for many years you don't recognize that many differences. There is also a much more uniform exposure to role models and people in the community. The larger the cities, the more social and racial dysfunction that exists. I don't know if that is true. Slavery wasnt exactly 'self reliance' and 'caring for oneself' A lot of knowing how to exploit others for the benefit of oneself was involved in that founding, and is still involved in maintaining the status quo, IMHO. I think, when push comes to shove, the difference is the skin color and being able to relate to "us vs "them". Making profits off of the work of others is the comparison. That is a bit more complex than merely 'self reliance' or 'caring for oneself'. Self reliance is great, but rarely the simple absolute that the cliche implies. People rely on people. No one lives in a bubble. It is when that wage is set by the masters and not by living standards.I agree though that people will always disagree on their subjective views about what people 'should' be able to do and what they 'could' do for themself. |
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Always a few smartazzes on here!!
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