It can.
Their choice: Be outgoing/sunny, or...not.

Who?

The name is what I make of it.

That's too true.
Talked with my honey tonight while she was falling asleep.
Saweeet...but not as sweet as being there.

If you do the slinky for your man, in front of other people, then the "end" result is fairly certain...if you can handle a quick response.

Can those brownie points be traded for outdoor lumber (since I need to build an elevated deck near the garden)?

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I cannot describe indescribable, but that is too oft the words that I retreat to using in my mind.
I cannot describe this scoundrel's soul, and now I fear that she knows my soul better than I do, and therein lies the answer; for she loves this man who I am becoming with her. She sees who I was, but was hidden from even myself, and she sees our future and she embraces and desires that life.
Is this the best description of my perfect soulmate; that already I trust her intuition and her heart, before ever I can use words that fairly describe her?
She took me, for herself, and I am just like a homeless cat purring on her lap, feeling at home already.
Home is within her.
She mates my soul.

It's Friday.

Whoop

De

Flucking

Do

Ever try selling Castor Oil to a guinea pig?

These comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country:

16 'You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through.'

15 'Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while.'

14 'If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document.'

13 'If you run, you'll only go to jail tired.'

12 'Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you.'

11 'You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?'

10 'Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?'

9 'Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket. '

8 'The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?'

7 'Fair? You want me to be fair? Lis ten, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop.'

6 'Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.'

5 'In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.'

4 'How big were those 'two beers' you say you had?'

3 'No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can.'

2 'I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.'

AND THE WINNER IS....

1 'You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here.'

The Snow Plough One winter morning at breakfast a couple was listening to the radio. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8-10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snowplough can get through."

The wife went out and moved her car.

A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 10-12 inches of snow today, you will need to move your car to the odd-numbered side of the street so the snowplough can get through."

So the wife went out and moved her car again.

The next week, while they were eating breakfast, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 12-14 inches of snow today and you must park..." Then the power went off!

The wife was very upset. With a worried look on her face she said, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street am I supposed to park on?"

With the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married to BLONDES exhibit, her husband said, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"

A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral.
A huge heartcovered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.
At theappropriate moment following the eulogy, as his friends andcolleagues watched, the heart opened and the casket rolled inside.
The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heartforever.

At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter!
When all eyesstared at him, he said, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my ownfuneral. I'm a Gynecologist!!"




That's when the Proctologist fainted.

Guy? A guy fixed it? Not like a "I want her to come back, again and again...or call me over to her place" kind of guy?

If I had your zip code (do they have those, in Canada?) or location, I might find a deal online for a computer that beats what you've got.

On the other hand..it could be your location/service. No matter how nice your system is, if your signal strength only allows one thing at a time, you're up the creek.

fire-inflating a tire in the mud

It's unbelievable, but real.

http://www.mefeedia.com/entry/interesting-tire-repair-technique/13813518

<--willing to dye my beard red.

Subject: It's Hell getting OLD
It's Hell !!!

Old people have problems that you haven't even considered yet!

An 85-year old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.
The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow."
The next day the 85-year old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.
The doctor asked what happened and the man explained,
"Well, doc, it's like this - first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.
"We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing."

The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?"

The old man replied, "Yep, none of us could get the jar open".

Be yourself; be cool; be patient; let Love find you by surprise.

It works for me.