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Topic: How many widowers out there?
5x10's photo
Thu 07/08/10 10:49 AM

I was married for 19 years and have been widowed for the last 2



Welcome flowerforyou
If there is ever anything we can do, let us help. We all have very big shoulders and will gladly listen. Join in on the forums and get to know us. Great bunch of people here. Mary

no photo
Thu 07/08/10 11:27 AM
brokenheart
I have been divorced twice last time nineteen years ago. Between first and second marriage nine years. I have basically been single and not in committed relationships. It takes two to make it work so I have devoted my life to the Lord so with these years I looked within and have grown into the woman I should be. I also never dated much because of the types I met were not doing well in life so I was more as a friend. Most of my relationships have been based upon a roommate situation. I never had children because of not having a committment and this is due to a lot of travel and enjoying myself in life period. I have had the same ups and downs as others, but mainly stay to myself. I watch others struggle with family, divorce, and so I always stayed around singles just for having fun from work and school. Most of my education in the past was self education. I have found interest again at the University. I deal with a lot of responsibility and always have with no outside help or very little.
Marriage was good for what it was and I still think how nice it would be to find someone mature who has the same ideals.

5x10's photo
Thu 07/08/10 12:59 PM

brokenheart
I have been divorced twice last time nineteen years ago. Between first and second marriage nine years. I have basically been single and not in committed relationships. It takes two to make it work so I have devoted my life to the Lord so with these years I looked within and have grown into the woman I should be. I also never dated much because of the types I met were not doing well in life so I was more as a friend. Most of my relationships have been based upon a roommate situation. I never had children because of not having a committment and this is due to a lot of travel and enjoying myself in life period. I have had the same ups and downs as others, but mainly stay to myself. I watch others struggle with family, divorce, and so I always stayed around singles just for having fun from work and school. Most of my education in the past was self education. I have found interest again at the University. I deal with a lot of responsibility and always have with no outside help or very little.
Marriage was good for what it was and I still think how nice it would be to find someone mature who has the same ideals.


Welcome to M2 flowerforyou
We all have our stories on here be it from our loved ones passing or through divorce but the outcome remains the same, a sad broken heart. Some are ready to move on, some come to this site for companionship and friends. We try to be a shoulder to cry and lean on in times of sorrow and a cheering squad for when things are going great. Join us and get to know the wonderful caring people on here and make some new friends. Mary


5x10's photo
Thu 07/08/10 06:40 PM
Edited by 5x10 on Thu 07/08/10 06:41 PM
opps...double post


carold's photo
Thu 07/08/10 06:56 PM

I was married for 19 years and have been widowed for the last 2

Welcomewaving I was married 18 on Christmas Eve it will be 5 years

carold's photo
Thu 07/08/10 06:57 PM

brokenheart
I have been divorced twice last time nineteen years ago. Between first and second marriage nine years. I have basically been single and not in committed relationships. It takes two to make it work so I have devoted my life to the Lord so with these years I looked within and have grown into the woman I should be. I also never dated much because of the types I met were not doing well in life so I was more as a friend. Most of my relationships have been based upon a roommate situation. I never had children because of not having a committment and this is due to a lot of travel and enjoying myself in life period. I have had the same ups and downs as others, but mainly stay to myself. I watch others struggle with family, divorce, and so I always stayed around singles just for having fun from work and school. Most of my education in the past was self education. I have found interest again at the University. I deal with a lot of responsibility and always have with no outside help or very little.
Marriage was good for what it was and I still think how nice it would be to find someone mature who has the same ideals.

Enjoy the forums

ladybug17's photo
Sun 08/15/10 07:31 AM
Edited by ladybug17 on Sun 08/15/10 07:32 AM
was going to be married21 years but loss my hubby in jan

no photo
Tue 05/24/11 08:55 AM
I was married for 31 years and lost my husband 2 years ago after a very long illness.

Fate has been good to me, and I'm now in a relationship with a widower who lost his wife 15 years ago.

I never intended dating him when we first met, but we did have 'widowhood' in common. Both of us lost our partners to cancer so have had many similar experiences of the nightmare of the 'Big C'.

We found that we could talk to each other in ways that you can't talk to other people that have not lived through the same experiences. It's not so difficult during the first year, but, all too soon, everyone thinks you should be 'over' it and people just don't want to talk about it any more.

Somewhere in all of this, we developed a very strong bond. We talk openly about our former partners, look through old photos together and chat about times past with no jealousy.

Now, our relationship has moved on, and we're making our own plans for a future together. It's bittersweet that we've both been through so much, but, in an odd way, it was our experiences that brought us together.

We are planning on marrying later this year.

Sharris's photo
Tue 05/24/11 09:41 AM

I was married for 31 years and lost my husband 2 years ago after a very long illness.

Fate has been good to me, and I'm now in a relationship with a widower who lost his wife 15 years ago.

I never intended dating him when we first met, but we did have 'widowhood' in common. Both of us lost our partners to cancer so have had many similar experiences of the nightmare of the 'Big C'.

We found that we could talk to each other in ways that you can't talk to other people that have not lived through the same experiences. It's not so difficult during the first year, but, all too soon, everyone thinks you should be 'over' it and people just don't want to talk about it any more.

Somewhere in all of this, we developed a very strong bond. We talk openly about our former partners, look through old photos together and chat about times past with no jealousy.

Now, our relationship has moved on, and we're making our own plans for a future together. It's bittersweet that we've both been through so much, but, in an odd way, it was our experiences that brought us together.

We are planning on marrying later this year.

many congratulations to you...

no photo
Tue 05/24/11 10:24 AM
Thank you Sharon. :smile:

5x10's photo
Fri 05/27/11 06:28 PM

I was married for 31 years and lost my husband 2 years ago after a very long illness.

Fate has been good to me, and I'm now in a relationship with a widower who lost his wife 15 years ago.

I never intended dating him when we first met, but we did have 'widowhood' in common. Both of us lost our partners to cancer so have had many similar experiences of the nightmare of the 'Big C'.

We found that we could talk to each other in ways that you can't talk to other people that have not lived through the same experiences. It's not so difficult during the first year, but, all too soon, everyone thinks you should be 'over' it and people just don't want to talk about it any more.

Somewhere in all of this, we developed a very strong bond. We talk openly about our former partners, look through old photos together and chat about times past with no jealousy.

Now, our relationship has moved on, and we're making our own plans for a future together. It's bittersweet that we've both been through so much, but, in an odd way, it was our experiences that brought us together.

We are planning on marrying later this year.



Yes, the universe has been good to you. It goes to show, if God has plans for you, it will happen. I am happy for you!

TXSW's photo
Wed 06/01/11 09:24 PM
I hope that people are still posting on this topic
I was married for 26 years and have been a widow for 2. I am still having problems adjusting. My husband died suddenly,thankfully my boys were in their 20's and I was able to find a good paying job but, the loneliness is almost untolerable at times.
I have girlfriends but, eventually they return home to their families.
I just don't know if life will ever improve. I feel I am taking all the steps I need to do. Maybe this is the best that it gets.

mssilverfox's photo
Thu 06/02/11 07:34 AM
I was married 26 yrs when my husband passed 4 yrs ago..Being older I didn't have to go to work but I did do some volunteer work.. The evenings are the worst.. I used to cry and scream out load.. My neighbors probably thought I was losing it!..lol A friend suggested I go on a dating site about 9 mo after he died but I wasn't ready to date.. However I did check it out, met some very nice people, men and women, that helped me thru that Xmas holidays.. It was about 2 yrs before I dated but sure was nice to have someone to talk to and it helped pass the time.. Don't worry about what someone might think, do what you feel is comfortable for you.. Good luck

no photo
Thu 06/02/11 07:44 AM
On the 5 this month it will be six years. Been out with only groups of people. No singular person has entered my life. I do believe the walls are thick and tall protecting myself from being hurt once again. I have many lady friends, It is grand to just at times have someone to just talk with.

RainbowTrout's photo
Thu 06/02/11 10:32 AM
It has been six years for me now and I am adjusting just fine. May 4th of this year made the six years. I meet a lot of ladies at work. One of my nurse friends at work leant me ten bucks for gas to make it to next Thursday when I get my pay check. I have learned that I am only alone if I choose to be. Emerging myself in work to help others has helped me to cope and even have a social lifestyle that I can be happy.:smile:

62easygoing's photo
Thu 06/02/11 03:14 PM
guess for me its about 29 years. I still get , pizza every once-in-a-while.:heart:

winterblue56's photo
Sat 06/04/11 07:55 AM

I hope that people are still posting on this topic
I was married for 26 years and have been a widow for 2. I am still having problems adjusting. My husband died suddenly,thankfully my boys were in their 20's and I was able to find a good paying job but, the loneliness is almost untolerable at times.
I have girlfriends but, eventually they return home to their families.
I just don't know if life will ever improve. I feel I am taking all the steps I need to do. Maybe this is the best that it gets.


I'm very sorry for your loss. Losing the person you shared everything with has got to be very hard. When my brother lost his wife/bff it was years before he could function. People would be telling him to get over it. Me...I told him do not listen to those people. Your heart will heal in it's own time. I've lost loved ones in my life also ...but I still feel them very close to me. Like a shadow watching over me and helping to guide me in my lifes journey. Life will improve. It's your heart that guides you.
Embrace the greiving, remember all the wonderful times and try to leave an open space in your heart for love to grow again. Hugs Sherry

Sharris's photo
Sat 06/04/11 08:05 AM

I hope that people are still posting on this topic
I was married for 26 years and have been a widow for 2. I am still having problems adjusting. My husband died suddenly,thankfully my boys were in their 20's and I was able to find a good paying job but, the loneliness is almost untolerable at times.
I have girlfriends but, eventually they return home to their families.
I just don't know if life will ever improve. I feel I am taking all the steps I need to do. Maybe this is the best that it gets.

Hi, I'm Sharris
It's been 6 years this July. A week afterwards, a "good" friend told me to suck it up and get on with life. Grief has it's own life, listen to you...you cannot force it. I went through all the motions...I will just say this, you will know when it is better, in the meantime, come here, talk to us, laugh a little on The 50's threads..Topicless..most everyone here would appreciate to get a note sayin... Hi..or I'm strugglin or..anything..some real understanding folk here. Take Care

jemilinia's photo
Sun 07/24/11 07:00 AM
I am widow for 15 years, i understand the feeling of being a widow.

Sharris's photo
Sun 07/24/11 08:12 AM

I am widow for 15 years, i understand the feeling of being a widow.

Hello, I hope you will find friends here. Many of us understand though each situation is different. I am sad for your loss.

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