Keep 'em guessin'

I can't stop laughing here ...

jeeeeez .. this is so funny... you won my admiration
/ still laughing here ../

I have a read a lot of profiles that say something along the lines like:

My children are the most important thing in the world to me!

or...

My kids, who are my life and are God's greatest gift to me!


or....


Mother of 5 BEAUTIFUL children who are a blessing!!

---


But I haven't seen ones that lean the other way.....strange.

Perfect example right there, flew over my head like a plane over Iraq. It's alright though, my X thought I was joking when I first met her and told her that usually I have no clue whats going on, so I just sit, smile, and be quiet. After we broke up, she told me, "I honestly thought you were smarter, most guys who are quiet are." LOL guess I showed her :P

I think there is 2 aspects of this thread....1 is about ppl and their ability to be articulate and spell well.....then theres an element of online personas and expectations.

Not everyone is perfect with Grammar, we all have different strengths and abilities. Where 1 person may be very precise and adamant about proper spelling, another may be great at practical subjects or sports. Also, when some ppl come on here, they dont really know wat to write and maybe look at other profiles for guidance. In my honest opinion, there is also ppl who r fakes online, and make up any old sh1te to amuse/shock/entertain ppl.

Secondly, why do ppl have expectations of other ppl who mean nothing to them? Who cares wat others have in their profile? unless u r connected to them in some way, why would it bother ya? Personally, i dont look at profiles on here as a general rule, i only come on to keep up with friends and participate in forums. Ultimately, i think it is wrong to expect everyone to be intelligent, because intelligence is not ONLY shown thru good grammar. I am not intelligent on an academic level, but i feel i am intelligent in regards to wat i have learned in life, my experiences, etc.

I dont judge ppl on their poor grammar, but rather the content of their writing, or the context. If someone comes across as an azz or a fake, then it is that which makes me judge them.

Being alone = our own choice

It is easy to find someone to find the ideal one is harder to find the perfect one almost impossible.

When you look for an image of someone or a preconceived idea of what she/he should be then you'll never find it.

The more difficult we are the harder it will be to find the one.

I cant help but love what I read. By the way 7 smurt men is not "many". I only hope that your wrong. Good read.

Just or the record, i think there are MANY, MANY intelligent men and women on here. Whether they promote that in themselves is quite another thing.

Usually smurt people dont advertise. How many profiles read My Name Is Bob and I am Intelligent

Hey Lex-I-Con!!

What truly constitutes a bad profile?

People put in there what they want is all!

I completely changed mine... Thought I put a little to much out there so I reigned myself in a little-no a lot

Stop being so stuffy. Come dance with me! Let me loosin you up! LOL

I'm just trying to have some fun and make a point (OK, maybe a couple of points) at the same time. Obviously some get it and some don't.

Gossip, as to your question about what constitutes a bad profile --

There are a lot of things that can factor in; what I'm mainly talking about here is the profile that's just the same dozen cliches that are on every other profile. It just strikes me as odd when so many profiles say "I'm the most unique person you'll ever meet!" and the rest of it is exactly the same as the last 117 profiles I read.

Maybe many people are afraid to be unique. They might think they will be perceived as being weird if they show their true selves in their profile. So in that sense you are right when you say people write what they think they are supposed to write. They write what they think people want to hear.

Of course some people just dont have the right attributes to beable to put together a good profile. Not everyone can have a vivid imagination or an ability to put some decent words together.

I guess with your profile, Lex, that many people will find it intimidating. Not the words you have written in it necessarily, but more the length. Maybe many people pass you by because they dont want to spend that much time reading it all. Anyone that has a particular interest in you should want to read it all, but in the initial meeting phase, maybe it turns a few away. If you were writing a resume for a job, for example, and the employer has a hundred others to read that were two pages long, and in the pile was your 10 page one, yours could just go straight on to the reject pile, totally unread.

That's pretty much how it seems to me. You have thousands of people writing exactly the same thing: "Looks don't matter," "It's what's on the inside that counts," "Looking for someone nice and fun," and so on -- just seems to me that if any of this stuff was true, we'd be seeing a lot more people actually getting together (or making the attempt) than what we're seeing in reality.

Here's the problem -- if I, as the discerning profile reader (that's almost an oxymoron!), can't distinguish any difference whatsoever in any of the last 4219 profiles I read, where's my incentive to want to know more about that person?



No, but they could do something other than cut-n-paste the same drivel they see everywhere else. Not everyone has great writing skills, but humor and perspective can often make up for it. Of course, this necessitates that the person have some humor and perspective, so you may have a point there.



I don't ever want to be accused of being the guy who didn't provide enough information!

If length is an issue, they can read it in sections -- a lot of people have told me that's how they did it.

I'm looking for someone with whom I have some common ground here; and that's not an easy thing to find -- I want to be clear about what matters to me, because I DON'T want people to waste their time if there's no point.

Part of my thinking, with the profile, is that it's just impossible to really find out anything about the people whose profiles I read. They just don't put anything in there. So I make sure mine is complete and definitive, and if that appeals to anyone, they can tell me about it. Saves me the time of sending out dozens of e-mails to people who haven't given me the first clue as to what I should write to them about.

I do see it as somewhat different from a job application, in that a prospective employer isn't going to need to know about 97% of the stuff in my profile. They're not going to care that I wrote some books, or that I was in a bad marriage, or that I have a phobia about being turned into a goat. They just want to know if I can stack toasters on a shelf, or whatever.

Hey LexFonteyne,
I'm agree with the points in you post , its so true but let me ask you something:

1. To whom you address your post - to the ppl with native English language or to all , including foreigners?

2. If I'm a foreigner or someone who grew up and was living long time abroad and my grammar is not good but by my post I can prove that I'm not only highly educated but I have also equal deep and serious knowledge are you going to count me .. ermm not intelligent and disable for an intellectual discussion ?

And I'm apologize but the claim:"I'm the most unique person you'll ever meet!" is absolutely true ! Each one is absolutely unique person and if you try to understand the ppl you talk and meet , you'll be really surprised to find out this. And that most of the ppl don't meet your expectations is other point here.

I don't think that the thread you created about profiles will help someone to improve their profile or their style of writing or the way of thinking but only to feel insult .

She (my assumption) must be one fiery pepper. You have my permission to send a message to this mingler to that effect. lol

As a general rule, I have found that the non-first-language-English-speakers tend to write BETTER profiles than the "natural" English speakers. (Same with e-mails, too.) There are exceptions, but they're not particularly prevalent. I'm not sure if this reflects more of a DESIRE to be clear (on the part of the nons), or if it's an indictment of the state of the American school system. Probably a little of both.




No, because there's more to intelligence than simple word order, etc.

I really only know 2 languages -- English, and Russian (4 years in high school). If I had to create a profile in, let's say, Portuguese, for a dating site, it would probably be a mess. I'm aware of that, and if it wound up on the Portuguese version of "One Glorious Profile," I'd be OK with that.



I have a problem with someone who claims to be unique and then goes on to write exactly the same thing everyone else writes. That does not conform to my understand of "unique."

Now, if you want to say, "Well, this person has unique DNA nucleotide encoding patterns!" then, sure, you've got a point. They usually don't say that in the profile though.

I may be a little more sensitive to this aspect of things, though, because I've spent most of my life struggling with people who CLAIM to be outside-the-box but who have, in reality, never seen past the inside bottom of the lid.



You'd be surprised how many people have written to me and said "After reading your post about profiles, I decided to go back and look at my own and make some changes."

Whether those changes were for the better, or were effective or not, I can't say.

As for insulting -- you'll notice I didn't name any names here. If someone takes it upon themselves to feel insulted, that's their choice. To those people, I would say, "Lighten up, it's a thread on a dating site forum."

Okay. Here's a question. When a woman says she's looking for a smart man...

Does she want a guy that can outscore the contestants on Jeopardy, or a guy that would be a champion on The Newlywed Game?

Neither....we just want them to dress nice! lol!

In my experience -- and this is a statistically limited sampling -- "I'm looking for a smart man" means "I'm not looking for a smart man, I'm looking for a guy with a large hole in his back where I can insert a steering wheel."

Or, to put it another way: "I'm looking for a guy who I can change into the kind of guy I want." Of course, you can't SAY that because it's a huge red flag and no one would reply. Well, almost no one.

This begs the question of why not just LOOK for the kind of guy you actually want, instead of trying to find one who isn't and then CHANGE him....?

But maybe there's no challenge to that....

I don't know. As I say, my experience is not statistically significant. Your mileage (and steering wheel) may vary.