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| Topic: Admit It, Ladies, You Don't Want "Smart" | |
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 Oh my bad. I so got into answering your comments I forgot to answer the beginning OP .. YES. I have to have an intelligent man. I graduated Summa Cum Laude from college for a reason. I also got divorced for a reason. He could not keep up with me in stimulating convo. My philosphy is to need a man who can challenge and satisfy me both in bed and in banter. Now THAT'S sexy 
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Edited by
Monier
on
Tue 08/10/10 07:55 PM
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Man, it really depends. I have an adaptable intelligence. I am the most philosophical when by myself, but with another person, it's more about personality inspired by the person of interest's persona.
Wow, people are sure different. One person may say that I act like a 12 year old, the next will say I have the dark humor of a cynic, to another I'm an arrogant jerk, and yet to another I am the sweetest caring wonderful man. Aha!!! I am indeed all of those things!! Now saying that, who is better to judge my intelligence other than myself? Surely not somebody that I am dating or considering to date. I realize at least 30% of their reactions to me are because of me and influenced more than likely based on emotion and/or past experiences having little to do with intelligence, theirs nor mine. I would think that wisdom would be a much more important quality |
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2+2= 5 right?
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2+2= 5 right? *pats Goof on the head and smiles* Yes dear .. that's right ........................... 
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Ahhhhhhhh dear Lex. I have deleted what I find redundant and will answer what I feel pertinent. Sorry time is short here  1 - WTH is OGP????? 2 - "Ward Cleaver in a business suit" .. sounds kinda hot to me ..  3 - "Wants you to become the opposite of what she was attracted to in the first place" .. THIS is true of all relationships miscommunication. Here's why. The EXACT thing they were attracted to you for has TWO sides. Yep, that's right. There is the positive side they LUUUUUUUUUUV and then the negative side of same-said mannerism or characteristic they detest. This is true of ALLL behaviors we are attracted to. eg .. I may LOVE the fact that you are soooo gregarious and charismatic .. but I HATE the fact that you use that with EVERYONE not just me. You will actually put the cashier first because you are so social and I stand there ignored. SIGH. But I DID love it in the beginning  nuf said. 4 - "Looks don't matter" ?????????????? What PLANET are these women from Lex?   Of COURSE looks matter. Everyone is attracted to someone else they have tendencies to be attracted to. Note I did not say "attractive" but "attracted". Moving on ...................... 5 - Would the Martians have Milky Ways? or will I need to check the MILKY WAY for that .. yummy  Speaking of knee-jerk responses .. this is NOT one of them. I took my time. Heck I even wrote it in purple 1. OGP = "One Glorious Profile." The thread Aaronzdad started back in WWII or thereabouts which is still running and is now on its 6th Part. 2. Well, I suppose there is a possibility that "Ward Cleaver in a Business Suit" would appeal to some people. Of course, my hunch is that all of those people died before 1970, but with all the miraculous advances in medical technology, anything is possible. My point (and this is assuming there is one, which is not necessarily a valid assumption) is that I am not Ward. As much as I would like to hang out with Richard Deacon and give Wally a hard time about losing his jacket, I just don't see that as a viable future for me. 3. But if that's true, then all relationships are doomed. Oh, wait, you're right! Oooops. Maybe my "90 days and out" philosophy was more realistic than I had realized! 4. Well, that's the whole issue about looks. I see profile after profile where people say "Looks don't matter to me, I'm only interested in who you are on the inside," but you rarely see Quasimodo getting a girlfriend on a dating site (I'm deliberately ignoring HunchbackOfNotreDameDating.com because I really don't want to think about that). Looks DO matter, don't they? To differing degrees to different people, sure, but I think we all have some sort of implicit idea of what's attractive physically vs. what isn't. 5. I actually like Milky Ways better, so let's go with that. |
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2+2= 5 right? Only if the 1 is silent. You never know, just because you don't see the 1 does'nt mean that it's not there. |
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Edited by
MelodyGirl
on
Tue 08/10/10 08:04 PM
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2+2= 5 right? I'm in love!!  Goof, you're so pretty!
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2+2= 5 right? I'm in love!! Goof, you're so pretty! My theories are always so easy to prove! I should be a scientist!  |
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It's also fair to say that cultures and economies of people around the globe differ in the criteria by which they define intelligence. Is it hands-on knowledge that evokes a sense of intelligence, as in the examples of fixing a flat, changing the oil, laying tile in the foyer? To some women, that's the epitome of manliness, a take charge do-it-yourself guy. Yet, to others intelligence is more an aesthetic characteristic, evinces a knowledge of history, politics, travel and a cosmopolitan view of the world. I liken that to taking the Foreign Service exam, that diplomatic intelligence which reveals your fine liberal education. Yes, traditionally, we in the Western world classify intelligence with a Stanford-Binet or Wechsler AIS, or popularly carrying a Mensa card in your wallet (or purse, as the case may be). My point is this, depending on your social or economic strata and with whom you rub shoulders, that will determine how you're typecast. In some circles, what is common knowledge would be considered high-brow conversation. Engineers, physicians, lawyers all have their own circles of life, as do truckers, iron-workers, etc. Life is a melange of meeting people who are, or are not, your peers, your intellectual equals, or your moral equals. One has to be willing to be genuine with that other person on those issues which are most valued in your respective lives. That said, I'd not get into a relationship with anyone who wants to compel a dramatic change in either person, as it just will not likely work. Perhaps the Indian caste system has it right after all, one stays endogamous to their own.
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A$$ needs Smart like Exercise needs Pointless |
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Ahhhhhhhh dear Lex. I have deleted what I find redundant and will answer what I feel pertinent. Sorry time is short here 1 - WTH is OGP????? 2 - "Ward Cleaver in a business suit" .. sounds kinda hot to me .. 3 - "Wants you to become the opposite of what she was attracted to in the first place" .. THIS is true of all relationships miscommunication. Here's why. The EXACT thing they were attracted to you for has TWO sides. Yep, that's right. There is the positive side they LUUUUUUUUUUV and then the negative side of same-said mannerism or characteristic they detest. This is true of ALLL behaviors we are attracted to. eg .. I may LOVE the fact that you are soooo gregarious and charismatic .. but I HATE the fact that you use that with EVERYONE not just me. You will actually put the cashier first because you are so social and I stand there ignored. SIGH. But I DID love it in the beginning nuf said. 4 - "Looks don't matter" ?????????????? What PLANET are these women from Lex? Of COURSE looks matter. Everyone is attracted to someone else they have tendencies to be attracted to. Note I did not say "attractive" but "attracted". Moving on ...................... 5 - Would the Martians have Milky Ways? or will I need to check the MILKY WAY for that .. yummy Speaking of knee-jerk responses .. this is NOT one of them. I took my time. Heck I even wrote it in purple 1. OGP = "One Glorious Profile." The thread Aaronzdad started back in WWII or thereabouts which is still running and is now on its 6th Part. 2. Well, I suppose there is a possibility that "Ward Cleaver in a Business Suit" would appeal to some people. Of course, my hunch is that all of those people died before 1970, but with all the miraculous advances in medical technology, anything is possible. My point (and this is assuming there is one, which is not necessarily a valid assumption) is that I am not Ward. As much as I would like to hang out with Richard Deacon and give Wally a hard time about losing his jacket, I just don't see that as a viable future for me. 3. But if that's true, then all relationships are doomed. Oh, wait, you're right! Oooops. Maybe my "90 days and out" philosophy was more realistic than I had realized! 4. Well, that's the whole issue about looks. I see profile after profile where people say "Looks don't matter to me, I'm only interested in who you are on the inside," but you rarely see Quasimodo getting a girlfriend on a dating site (I'm deliberately ignoring HunchbackOfNotreDameDating.com because I really don't want to think about that). Looks DO matter, don't they? To differing degrees to different people, sure, but I think we all have some sort of implicit idea of what's attractive physically vs. what isn't. 5. I actually like Milky Ways better, so let's go with that. NOW you're talkin ............. |
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A$$ needs Smart like Exercise needs Pointless I think you've discerned the essence of this thread! |
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I'm going to go out on a limb here because, well, what the hell difference can it possibly make at this point? (That's a rhetorical question, by the way. You don't have to answer that one. It won't be on the final.) OK, here's the scenario. I read lots of women's profiles. I have to. That's where I get the material for OGP. And most of them say "I want to meet a guy who's intelligent" or something along those lines. And most of the women I've been involved with have commented on my intellect, some of them almost non-stop. "Oh, you're the smartest person I've ever met!" they say with a tinge of admiration (or is that jealousy, or premeditated murder?) in their voices. Well, I don't know. Considering most of them have grown up in environments where a llama wearing a red hat would be considered a genius, I don't know how much stock to put in these assessments, but I guess they're still better than being married or having to eat broccoli. I mean, OK, I'm pretty smart, as these things go, and if that makes me sound like an Arrogant Narcissistic Conceited jerk, well, I'm OK with that. I don't believe in false modesty, and I'm not entirely convinced that true modesty is such a great idea, either. So, here's the problem -- once I get comfortable in the relationship (or as close to "comfortable" as I can let myself get, at this point), there's always this sudden change where she wants me to TURN MY BRAIN OFF AND BECOME A CARDBOARD CUTOUT OF WARD CLEAVER IN A BUSINESS SUIT. In other words, she wants me to become the very opposite of the person she was originally attracted to in the first place. What's wrong with this picture? (Rhetorical again. Not on final.) Now, maybe there is a woman out there who really does want an intelligent guy. And maybe all of the profiles that say "Looks don't matter, it's what's on the inside that counts" are being totally honest, too.... And maybe Martians will visit us tonight and give us all Snickers bars. I also know that anytime I post anything that calls people's behaviors into question, 500 of them will immediately say "I'm not like that!" -- which is a nice, knee-jerk, reflexive response. I'm calling BS here. THAT will be on the final. Well then the only psychological solution is that it is possibly true instituting variables for degrees in the differences of level of intelligence of each individual to determine how far intelligences have to be for one partner to feel intimidated enough that they may not be intelligent enough to keep and hold the said intelligent ones attention.......to other degrees of personality characteristics that may or may not conflict or compliment each other....too many variables to state women do not wish to date intelligent men..... |
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Ha. Acting dumb will get you trim!
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I do think there are a lot of women out there who want a man who is smart, but not smarter than they are. I think it has a lot to do with security.
I will admit that it is a little intimidating if he is smarter than me. However, it gives both of you a chance to learn new things. I say take people as they are...smart or not-so-smart, don't think they have to change just for you! |
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Well then the only psychological solution is that it is possibly true instituting variables for degrees in the differences of level of intelligence of each individual to determine how far intelligences have to be for one partner to feel intimidated enough that they may not be intelligent enough to keep and hold the said intelligent ones attention.......to other degrees of personality characteristics that may or may not conflict or compliment each other....too many variables to state women do not wish to date intelligent men..... Hey, don't confuse the issue by using reason here, it messes up the whole thing.... |
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I like Doritos. Well, I don't see what a Mexican wrestler has to do with anything, but OK. |
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Well then the only psychological solution is that it is possibly true instituting variables for degrees in the differences of level of intelligence of each individual to determine how far intelligences have to be for one partner to feel intimidated enough that they may not be intelligent enough to keep and hold the said intelligent ones attention.......to other degrees of personality characteristics that may or may not conflict or compliment each other....too many variables to state women do not wish to date intelligent men..... Hey, don't confuse the issue by using reason here, it messes up the whole thing.... Yes it does get quite complicated doesnt it.....and why not? whats wrong with reason? |
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Well then the only psychological solution is that it is possibly true instituting variables for degrees in the differences of level of intelligence of each individual to determine how far intelligences have to be for one partner to feel intimidated enough that they may not be intelligent enough to keep and hold the said intelligent ones attention.......to other degrees of personality characteristics that may or may not conflict or compliment each other....too many variables to state women do not wish to date intelligent men..... Hey, don't confuse the issue by using reason here, it messes up the whole thing.... Yes it does get quite complicated doesnt it.....and why not? whats wrong with reason? Well, I'm trying to make a point here, and in order for it to work, I have to use something we writers call "suspension of disbelief." Reason and logic tend to get in the way of that sort of thing! |
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I love intellectual men and would have no problem with a man who is "smarter" than myself as long as he did not find it an advantage to be so.
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