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| Topic: Throwing in the Towel | |
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So, I have thrown in the towel as far as dating and relationships. I am not angry or sad as I just don't care. So I am curious if you have given up on finding someone or are you still keeping your dream alive of finding your soulmate. Enquiring minds want to know.
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Welcome to the Mingle
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Mon 04/25/11 09:52 PM
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I don't believe in the 'soul mate' concept. I feel complete in myself and I don't feel I need to have someone to "complete" me like a soul mate.
I don't think of it as "giving up" on anything. At this point I'm more interested in learning the secrets of the universe and the finding balance and good health and learning to be more creative and enjoying life to the fullest. There is something to be said about being free. I hate to sound 'negative' about relationships but sometimes they can have a way of taking the wind out of your sails - as two people attempt to find someone as perfect for them as they feel they deserve (or want) and they proceed to go about trying to change each other... Only making each other miserable. I believe that as we evolve spiritually we are meant to find less of a need for a member of the opposite sex in order to give our lives meaning. We are never really alone when we make a connection to our inner being which I believe is also a connection to all that exists. |
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I don't believe in the 'soul mate' concept. I feel complete in myself and I don't feel I need to have someone to "complete" me like a soul mate. I don't think of it as "giving up" on anything. At this point I'm more interested in learning the secrets of the universe and the finding balance and good health and learning to be more creative and enjoying life to the fullest. There is something to be said about being free. I hate to sound 'negative' about relationships but sometimes they can have a way of taking the wind out of your sails - as two people attempt to find someone as perfect for them as they feel they deserve (or want) and they proceed to go about trying to change each other... Only making each other miserable. I believe that as we evolve spiritually we are meant to find less of a need for a member of the opposite sex in order to give our lives meaning. We are never really alone when we make a connection to our inner being which I believe is also a connection to all that exists. Very well said. I feel the same way that you don't need anyone to complete you. I feel exactly the way you described; I like being free and honestly relationships take too work for me, to much of my time, too much compromise. I never thought of evolving spiritually but I agree I certainly have found less of a need of having a man in my life. When I look back on it; I was never truly happy in a relationship; I was always happiest single. Thanks for your very intelligent insight on this topic. |
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So, I have thrown in the towel as far as dating and relationships. I am not angry or sad as I just don't care. So I am curious if you have given up on finding someone or are you still keeping your dream alive of finding your soulmate. Enquiring minds want to know. Realistically, I gave up ages ago. I still sort of keep the door open for the remote possibility that someone worthwhile and compatible might come along, but I have no expectations for that. What I've learned is that, as far as I have been able to determine, women don't want a guy who deviates from mainstream at all. They want a guy who will value booze and babies above all else, a guy who won't question anything, a guy who will turn off his brain and be a good little cardboard cutout of a man. I just don't see any appeal in it. If I happen to run into someone who thinks about something deeper than shoes and "American Idol," great. But I'm not holding my breath. |
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My first instinct was to defend and cheerlead the virtues of a relationship.
But in truth, one does get to a point, where it really doesn't matter. Trust and acceptance being the standard If it exists and I stumble upon it, then I'll give it a shot Being comfortable in one own's core, usually brings a cerain level of peace. |
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having someone around that cares about you is always a good thing, but it is not the most important. I gave up on "the one" a few years ago, but that doesn't mean that shes not out there. if she happens to come around, i may or may not even notice it now, but i still like to have fun with women... i just quit looking, and if i am alone the rest of my life, it won't bother me too much now...
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What I've learned is that, as far as I have been able to determine, women don't want a guy who deviates from mainstream at all. They want a guy who will value booze and babies above all else, a guy who won't question anything, a guy who will turn off his brain and be a good little cardboard cutout of a man. I just don't see any appeal in it. What you say makes sense. I guess I am not the norm as I like a man that challenges me. I don't want a "yes dear" type and never have. I hate when someone thinks they have to accompany you to an event when they really don't want to. One should feel free to express themselves without repercussion. |
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Im with LEX, as far as my door will never be closed to opportunity, i am not rushing or forcing something that does not exist with someone, but i am not actively searching. I am open minded about who i will go out with though. I have gone on several dates and some are not so compatible and some you just know are not realistic but they do help pass the time. i do hope one day to find that one person to settle down with though....maybe one day.
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Sshshs I threw in the towel a long time ago....But does not mean that I'm not open to the idea of a relationship if it was to happen.........
 It is much easier this way I do what I want to when I want to and don't wait around till I find someone to do things with...I live my life and actually enjoy being alone.... 
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Edited by
axl_rose40
on
Tue 04/26/11 10:46 AM
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I actually think the someone in our lives will cross our paths in unexpected time so I don't really give so much of an effort. I make myself available for any opportunity though. And I don't believe there's a big possibility that my soulmate will be my "housemate".
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I don't know that I believe in soulmates, but I do enjoy meeting new people and dating. So, no, I won't give up on that.
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Edited by
EasternSquirrel
on
Tue 04/26/11 01:11 PM
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Booze? Babies? Cardboard cutout? Numbskull? Yes man?
(you forgot to mention players and womanizers) LMAO!!!! I closed the door a very long time ago. Only recently did I decide to unlock it. |
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Edited by
burgundybry
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Tue 04/26/11 01:18 PM
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Yep, pretty much. As much as it would be a fervent hope of mine to find a significant other. Realistically though, there are so many variables to work/sort through, that I simply don't have the means to make it happen, unless by some miracle, she were local or close.
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Booze? Babies? Cardboard cutout? Numbskull? Yes man? (you forgot to mention players and womanizers) Gotta save something for the sequel! 
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It can be frustrating, very much so. It may take a long time, far longer than we'd like it to. We may have to weed out many "bad apples" till one tree is bare and move on to another.
BUT............NEVER GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!! I've dealt with many a heartache and heartbreak in my life. Some of the things I've been thru would make alot of people just say forget it I'm done. I haven't, nor will I ever. To give up is not me, giving up does not exist in my vocabulary. It is too easy to give up when times are tough, by not giving up during those times shows the measure of your inner strength. |
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It can be frustrating, very much so. It may take a long time, far longer than we'd like it to. We may have to weed out many "bad apples" till one tree is bare and move on to another. BUT............NEVER GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!! I've dealt with many a heartache and heartbreak in my life. Some of the things I've been thru would make alot of people just say forget it I'm done. I haven't, nor will I ever. To give up is not me, giving up does not exist in my vocabulary. It is too easy to give up when times are tough, by not giving up during those times shows the measure of your inner strength. But one person's "giving up" is another's "facing reality." I don't think it's fair to phrase someone's decision in terms of failure when they're just doing what seems logical and sensible to them. |
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Tue 04/26/11 03:48 PM
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It can be frustrating, very much so. It may take a long time, far longer than we'd like it to. We may have to weed out many "bad apples" till one tree is bare and move on to another. BUT............NEVER GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!! I've dealt with many a heartache and heartbreak in my life. Some of the things I've been thru would make alot of people just say forget it I'm done. I haven't, nor will I ever. To give up is not me, giving up does not exist in my vocabulary. It is too easy to give up when times are tough, by not giving up during those times shows the measure of your inner strength. But one person's "giving up" is another's "facing reality." I don't think it's fair to phrase someone's decision in terms of failure when they're just doing what seems logical and sensible to them. Its a giving up of the struggle. When you struggle with what you think you lack, according to the universal law of vibration, you continue to perpetuate the situation and you continue to get the same thing you are getting because that is what you are focused on. Instead, make room in your life for someone. Clear out a drawer or a room. Expect them and they will come. Invite them. That is how I got all my kitties. Never in my life have I ever gone out and collected a cat. They always come right to my door. Mmmmm |
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So, I have thrown in the towel as far as dating and relationships. I am not angry or sad as I just don't care. So I am curious if you have given up on finding someone or are you still keeping your dream alive of finding your soulmate. Enquiring minds want to know. 
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Tue 04/26/11 03:50 PM
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So, I have thrown in the towel as far as dating and relationships. I am not angry or sad as I just don't care. So I am curious if you have given up on finding someone or are you still keeping your dream alive of finding your soulmate. Enquiring minds want to know. That is such a sexy Indiana Jones Look in this picture! 
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