Does honesty carry more weight than ones physical appearance?
How does communication create healthy decisions?

Honesty and communication are very important to me. If I can't trust someone completely I can't be with them. Physical appearance is much lower on my list than honesty and integrity.

Oh YES!!! Honesty is everything..... looks are just material

Honesty to me is the number 1, but at the same time, I want to be attracted to my man.

I've come to the realization that, when you first meet a person (man or woman), that neither is 100% completely honest. Think about it. Have you ever said something that you knew was a "white" lie, simply because you were attracted to someone and you wanted them to like you? Of course most have, and if you say you haven't then either you are a rare person, or you are fooling yourself. It can be something silly. Like saying you love to jog five miles a day, and when that person asks you to join them for a job (simply because they believe you will like to accompany them) you then feel like you have to go.

My point is that their is a fine line with the whole honesty thing. Of course I want to be with someone who is honest about who they are and all that. Who doesn't? What I am saying is that a lot of time, relationships are built upon false pretences. Just an opinion.

hm id have to say someone who knows what they one and dont have committiment issues or ex issues did i meantion im sick of game players

I kinda see this actually. I guess its hard to be brutally honest, I guess honest without regard for the others feelings; especially in the beginning of a relationship. I think life doesn't grant us a lot of second chances (with people), so we do jump into impulse situations without thinking things through. We've all been there. Haha, I was once dating a guy who liked to hike, I mean really liked it. (former boy scout) I'm not much of a hiker but I wanted to try it just to see if its me or not. Of course I complained like a woman the higher we got. He found it funny, I was so embarrassed. I didn't want to hurt his feelings by saying I'm not really into it. So in those situations it does suck to be completely honest, I should have been in the beginning, maybe avoided the outcome, or in this case utter humiliation.

I think sometimes there's a fine line with what you put there vs. who you really are. Some of us don't know who we are in the whole package. I guess with that it takes years of acceptance. I think that's why I like to try new things, like the hiking thing. False pretenses surface for a lot of reasons. Too many to name. Its hard to be your authentic self sometimes. You think no one is going to get it.

I have deleted a several post from this thread please let me remind all that we have filters for a reason those that feel the need to by pass those filters are indeed breaking the site rules...Just because you put these signs @&*%$ in place in order for the word to be posted you are still breaking the rules. And will be dealt with.

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Kristi

yes it does carry more weight. first of all i don't judge by appearance because i'm not the sexiest horse in the stable for one. lol and it really is about what attracts you to someone. personally i'm attracted to accents. always have been lol..communication is key. secrets create barriers. i'm a blunt person most times and for some its intimidating but i don't like secrets and i don't like lies so i figure i'll be up front with you and the least you can do is be up front with me. Most people end up realizing i'm a very open minded person :)

In the long run it does cus its d most important yet ironically appearance cmes 1st, its wat gves honesty a chance to exist in da 1st instance.