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Topic: Dating a minister
no photo
Sun 06/24/12 08:39 PM
I started dating a Baptist minister and we have talked about being together in the future, BUT do I really need to convert in order to be accepted?

I am devoted to my faith and wouldn't want to choose between him and God what

lilott's photo
Sun 06/24/12 08:44 PM
He believes in god too.

CowboyGH's photo
Sun 06/24/12 08:55 PM

I started dating a Baptist minister and we have talked about being together in the future, BUT do I really need to convert in order to be accepted?

I am devoted to my faith and wouldn't want to choose between him and God what


Why should you have to convert in order to be accepted? Sounds like he already accepts you for whom you are.

PacificStar48's photo
Sun 06/24/12 09:30 PM
Inner Faith relationships are growingly common so I would think you could do just fine if you can work out the details.

You are young enough that children might be involved and that usually means so are Grandparents so I would think some premarital agreements would be wise.

Being the spouse of a minister is not for the faint of heart. Often you are a very public figure and subject to scrutiny, gossip, criticism, and unfair treatment in a multitude of ways. Many times your needs are going to be put not only behind God's calling but the needs of the flock. If you are not married to someone who really puts their marriage on the same level it can get very tough. It will even if they do.

I would not rush into anything and avail myself to programs that minister to the minister at your regional or national meetings so you know what you are getting into.

Good luck.

Ladywind7's photo
Sun 06/24/12 09:36 PM
May I ask how long you have known each other?

no photo
Sun 06/24/12 10:05 PM

Inner Faith relationships are growingly common so I would think you could do just fine if you can work out the details.

You are young enough that children might be involved and that usually means so are Grandparents so I would think some premarital agreements would be wise.

Being the spouse of a minister is not for the faint of heart. Often you are a very public figure and subject to scrutiny, gossip, criticism, and unfair treatment in a multitude of ways. Many times your needs are going to be put not only behind God's calling but the needs of the flock. If you are not married to someone who really puts their marriage on the same level it can get very tough. It will even if they do.

I would not rush into anything and avail myself to programs that minister to the minister at your regional or national meetings so you know what you are getting into.

Good luck.


Thank you for this wise advice. I know I would never compromise. He can but he will be kicked off from his job cause he is serving in the military. I know it will be an issue if people in his church wont see me with him during service activities.

We have thought about some other ways and still working it out.

We once called it quits but it didn't help, we both know that we can't let go of each other.


--------------------

Ladywind, we been dating not so long but as matured individuals we know what we wanted, just got stuck with this religion issue for now, but hopefully things will be better soon.

s1owhand's photo
Wed 06/27/12 06:30 AM
waving Hello Newg78!

Nice to see you back!

flowerforyou

Dodo_David's photo
Wed 06/27/12 02:21 PM
newg78,

Can I talk to you about this in private?

Since your mail filter setting won't let me send you private messages, either you have to change the setting or send me mail.

Just a thought.

AdventureBegins's photo
Wed 06/27/12 07:14 PM

I started dating a Baptist minister and we have talked about being together in the future, BUT do I really need to convert in order to be accepted?

I am devoted to my faith and wouldn't want to choose between him and God what

Think it out.

He is a Minister for an entire community. If you take him as your husband you must accept his 'job'.

As his wife you should aid him in his job (else why become his wife).

For the sake of the community he 'ministers' faith unto community. He needs, by his side, one that the community will accept.

God is in all things.

Only you know if it is necessary for you to 'convert'.

Without the 'conversion' you will be unable to assist him to the Apex of Prosperity and Salvation that the community expects from him (within that community).

Without him his 'flock' will not find that Apex either.

Redykeulous's photo
Thu 06/28/12 01:01 AM

Would you really be choosing between a man and God or are you more concerned about the differences in behaviors between two different religions?

If you believe in a god and someone else believes in a god, but neither of you believes there is more than one god - then is it possible you both believe in the same god and that the differences in behaviors between your religions are a man made construct?

Perhaps the questions you should asking yourself would be more along the lines of what AdventureBegins has laid out.

And perhaps one other - if there is love and respect in your heart as you interact with people and nature, what offence could you commit in the eyes of any god?

Fixingme's photo
Mon 09/03/12 10:16 PM
A Christian preacher would not date outside of his faith. The Bible forbids it. He may not believe all that has been written. Too many "preachers" today were not called by God. Many are doing it for the money or the power or the prestige or whatever reason they have.

Ladywind7's photo
Tue 09/04/12 12:51 AM
I think it would be hard, but forbidden? Please show me in the bible that it is forbidden for a preacher to marry outside their christianity?

CowboyGH's photo
Tue 09/04/12 06:14 AM

I think it would be hard, but forbidden? Please show me in the bible that it is forbidden for a preacher to marry outside their christianity?


To the best of my knowledge, a "preacher" has no special rules/laws to abide by in comparison to a normal person.

2 Corinthians 6:2
14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

msharmony's photo
Tue 09/04/12 12:23 PM

I started dating a Baptist minister and we have talked about being together in the future, BUT do I really need to convert in order to be accepted?

I am devoted to my faith and wouldn't want to choose between him and God what



traditionally ministers 'wives' are expected to be their partner, which means partnering in their religious calling as well

Im sure the modern times has examples of people who are religious but dont adhere as much to tradition,,,,

thats a discussion to have with your potential husband

Ruth34611's photo
Tue 09/04/12 12:28 PM
Edited by Ruth34611 on Tue 09/04/12 12:29 PM

I started dating a Baptist minister and we have talked about being together in the future, BUT do I really need to convert in order to be accepted?

I am devoted to my faith and wouldn't want to choose between him and God what


What does your boyfriend say about it?

I never date cops or ministers. No matter how nice they are. noway

Dodo_David's photo
Tue 09/04/12 06:43 PM
FYI, in 2 Corinthians 6:14, the Apostle Paul says, "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers." (ESV)

The creator of this thread has not explained what her faith is.
If she were a member of a Christian congregation that is not Baptist, then 2 Corinthians 6:14 would not apply to her.

If she is not a Christian, and that Baptist minister knows it, then something isn't right with that minister.

Ladywind7's photo
Wed 09/05/12 04:49 AM
Maybe the Minister simply fell in love. It does happen. I believe God prefers us to not be unequally yoked. But He certainly would not condemn. He is not a man that judges harshly. Mercy is greater than judgement!

wux's photo
Tue 09/11/12 02:18 AM
Edited by wux on Tue 09/11/12 02:23 AM

Maybe the Minister simply fell in love. It does happen. I believe God prefers us to not be unequally yoked. But He certainly would not condemn. He is not a man that judges harshly. Mercy is greater than judgement!


I am not so sure about this at all.

It says in the Bible somewhere, and I paraphrase, "God has his own inscrutable ways, and to pontificate and ponder or reflect on the nature of god, his way of thinking or his emotional movators to do something is not only futile, but it is blashpemous."

(this is actually the basis for the execution of starving 2,000,000 Immantonites to death in the Bible, page 2048.)

Therefore we can't look at the situation, if we were truly to be Christians, from the point of view of God; we can't allow ourselves to be as pretentious as to claim we know what God wants and with how much mayo on it, if any at all.

We must look at this strictly with a stance of secular judgement, which is also guaranteed by the Constitution of the United States.

(Author of this post wipes his forehead.)

Therefore:

I am also not sure if this Minister Boyfriend of the OP is truly a Babtist.

He does serve in the Military, for one. That is an absolute no-no fof Babtist Ministers. If it ever gets out, his job is going to be taken to the execution squad of the Church elders, so help me god.

If he is in love with you, OP, the Minister just signed the endorsement form that he is a biological being, with his own biological supercommands. He places his own biological call over and on top of the call of the Church, and thus he is unworthy of leading a flock to pasture. "If he can't get past 'er, he can't lead to pasture", as they say in my community.

The so-called and alleged Minister, who works in the military as a person-killer-on-command, is in love with a member of the visible minorities depsite his existence mainly in the church-belt or bible-belt, where ministers carry two colts and Gideon's Bible in their belts, and has several murders (on the battlefield) and lovers under his belt, I doubt extremely much if he is indeed a Babtist Minister at all by-and-large and at large. I am more inclined to believe that in reality he is an Anglican Archbishop, a Roman Catholic Mother Superior Nun, or a Muslim Dervish, than a Barbtits f minister.

wux's photo
Tue 09/11/12 02:30 AM
Edited by wux on Tue 09/11/12 02:36 AM

Maybe the Minister simply fell in love. It does happen. I believe God prefers us to not be unequally yoked. But He certainly would not condemn. He is not a man that judges harshly. Mercy is greater than judgement!


Lovewoman7, I must say that I have no doubt you are a devout believer in God, a fervent servant of God and all that's good in the world, but:

Please DO NOT CALL YOURSELF CHRISTIAN.

Christians are notoriously people who practice the teachings of the bible, and who follow its words. You seem to have shown contraband attitudes to these very basic and fundamental requirements of Christian life. Of course I can't command you what to call yourself, I take back my earlier remarque, but for you to say that you are a Christian, and in the next sentence argue with god, his word, and claim that you know better what god wants than god himself (as he has expressed himself on the issue clearly and unambigously, and yet you still wage a war with his words), is in my books either blashphemous, or silly, or not Christian whatsoever.

When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in Julia, do as Romeo does. When you claim you are a Christian, then believe, behave, and behove like Christians do.

Of which the number one rule is "Believe what's in the bible and for Christ's sake, don't argue against it."

wux's photo
Tue 09/11/12 02:41 AM
Edited by wux on Tue 09/11/12 02:44 AM
OP, the concesnsus here seems to be that the Babtist Minister you date is so far removed from his flock and from his duties, that you can do whatever you want with him, you will cause no harm to anyone if you marry him and you are Muslim or worse, a Catholic.

He has defrocked himself in several very serious ways, it seems, so what he does next is his own private business, he never needs to worry about any flock, and he never needs to worry about his job as a minister ever again.

You can marry him, and live happily ever after. His undisciplined insubordination to the bible and to the requirements of his job description with his actual lifestyle, has really placed him far from being able to perform in his job (as well as in the marital bedroom) as a minister.

Do with him as you wish. I advise you to make him go to tradesmen's college to study pipe-welding or electrical repair, 'coz he'll need a new job, too, soon. And none too soon.

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